A Single Line
by Atomic Lightbulb
Summary: Collection of Ryou and Yami no Bakura centric drabbles/oneshots based on a different line each story. Ch 79 - Bakura is being haunted by his conscience and Pluto is not a planet, among other things. Gemshipping. AU.
1. Midnight Muses

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A/N Well here's some background on this collection of drabbles. Basically it's a line that inspires a oneshot. The line will be posted at the beginning of the story. The line can be anything a song lyric, a phrase whatever my mind catches. Now each oneshot will be unique to itself when it comes to pairings so for this I would say it is a, tendershipping with yaoi goggles, brotherly love with het goggles or just midnight museings if you don't see anything. Oh, and I also take requests. Enjoy and Review!

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_You never get use to it. You just learn to live with it. ~ Broken Heart, Motion City Soundtrack_

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Bakura Ryou couldn't sleep. (He blamed the ring.)

It was so cold against his bare chest! Granted, the ring never was a furnace, but usually it had a pleasant vibe - like a soothing cup of tea. Or scorched his skin like fire. Both depended on what temperament the spirit who dwelled inside was in.

In fact, it was the spirit of the ring Ryou should be blaming, and not the ring itself. It was the spirit's fault the ring was empty (and by extension freezing cold) and it was the spirit's fault that he couldn't just take the blasted thing off.

Ryou was tired. Ryou was delirious. Ryou was mildly suicidal. All these things would explain why the white haired boy had arisen from his bed to search for a (proven!) murderous spirit.

He had covered ever square inch of his apartment by the time he had thought to look on the roof. So when he pushed open the door to the roof he was not surprise to see his reflection looking down – brooding. (The spirit seemed to do that a lot.)

To the untrained eye it would just look like the nice boy who lived in apartment number two hundred and twenty four had insomnia and his hair just looked especially silver in the moonlight. To Ryou it looked like an three thousand translucent spirit was plotting the destruction of the entire world.

"Hey!" Ryou said, giving up all hope for the stealth. Sneaking up on a thief was nearly impossible.

The spirit's posture changed – almost as if to pounce – and he gave a fleeting glare over his shoulder to Ryou.

Ryou was not intimidated. Mostly because he was to tired to think clearly.

The boy's feet trudged across the slippery roof to where the spirit stood. He stood for a long time, just looking at him, until the spirit could no longer ignore him.

"Is there something you want, yadonushi?" The spirit sneered.

Ryou's eyebrows furrowed. "Yes. You. In the ring. So I can sleep."

The spirit arched an eyebrow and scanned Ryou up and down incredulously before he scoffed and turned his attention back to the sky.

Ryou was in no mood to be ignored.

"I'm tired." he whined.

"I'm not stopping you from going to bed," the spirit said, as if to clarify because on many occasions he had done that.

"The ring is too cold without you, it's keeping me awake," said Ryou.

"Then turn up the heat," the spirit snapped, his hands beginning to clench. On a normally day Ryou would have recognize this as a sign to back off but instead Ryou kept pushing.

"It could be a hundred degrees and I still wouldn't be able to sleep. Besides, you shouldn't be out here. Thinking is only going to make it worst," said Ryou, inching closer to the spirit.

"What did you say?" the spirit glared, his version of Ryou's brown eyes flashing.

"I said," Ryou explained, taking a deep breath, "Thinking is only going to make worse."

The spirit starred, disbelievingly, at Ryou.

The white haired boy in question simply sighed.

"We share a mind. No matter how hard you try, some things slip through the cracks," Ryou said.

"You've been looking?" the spirit asked, regaining his composure. Which was a bad thing, seeing as the element of surprise was probably the only thing keeping Ryou unpunished right now.

"No," Ryou said truthfully, "The more I learn about you the more I like you."

Ryou's head bowed, "I don't want to like you."

"Well?" the spirit retorted.

"Well, what?" Ryou asked, starring up at the spirit. That had always confused Ryou, he could never figure out why the spirit always seemed taller if he took Ryou's form as his own.

"Aren't going to list all the ways I've wronged you. Proclaim you loyalty to the pharaoh?"

Ryou frowned. "No. I'm too tired to list them right now and Yuugi…," he trailed off.

The spirit let out a small chuckle. "Sympathy for the devil, yadonushi?"

Ryou glared (or did his best too) at the spirit.

"I don't think you're the devil. Just like I don't think Yuugi is a saint. I just think you're…confused."

"Confused?" the spirit smirked, "I know exactly what I'm doing,"

Ryou shrugged, "Doesn't make you any less confused,"

The spirit's triumphant looked faltered.

"I'm doing the right thing. And I will win," he turned away from Ryou and focused his attention back at the stars.

"No you won't," said Ryou, sighing.

"Oh, really?" the spirit said, "What makes you say that?"

"Because we never win,"

"We?" the spirit said, the smirk returning. Ryou blanched.

"I meant you," he assured.

"Of course you did."

"And even if you do win, it won't make you feel any better," Ryou said desperately, trying to change the subject.

"You don't know that," the spirit's words were reserved and definite.

"Yes, I do. You've been carrying around this hate for over three millennium, do you really think that a grudge that big will just go away?"

"This isn't about me. This is revenge for Kul Elna," the spirit said, eyes burning.

Ryou eyed the spirit up and down, almost sadly.

"Like I said, you shouldn't be thinking about it," Ryou turned away from the spirit, consumed in his own thoughts.

"Speaking from experience, yadonushi?" the spirit asked, eager to prey on Ryou's weakness.

Ryou's shoulder hunched, and he could almost hear Amane's laughter in his ears.

"Yes," there was a pause before Ryou said, "You should just let it go."

"Let it go!" the spirit barked and then let out a deranged laugh. The laugh, it _hurt_ Ryou.

"Are you saying I should just forgive and forget?! There will be no rest for me until the spirits of Kul Elna have had their vengeance,"

The spirit held his head high, above the people below them. Ryou let out another sigh.

"You don't forget or forgive – you just learn to move on," Ryou's words faded off into a whisper, and the spirit's tension slightly lessened.

The spirit and Ryou stood there, just looking at the sky, longer than either of them would ever think possible.

Ryou yawned.

"Will you go back in the ring now?" Ryou asked quietly, "I can't go to sleep without you,"

The spirit snorted, but Ryou knew he would comply.

Eventually.

(Probably not before sunrise.)

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	2. Hell

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_Hell is other people ~ Jean Paul Sartre_

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It was lunch and everyone was happy. Kids all across the lunch room were throwing their heads back in laughter and eagerly digging into their food. And Ryou sitting quietly at the end of the table, watching Yuugi destroy Jou in duel monsters. Watching Honda taunt Jou every chance he got for it and Anzu laughing with that gleam in her pretty blue eyes.

This was hell. (Ryou was sure of it.)

Some reasonable part of his mind would always try to disagree and say things like "If this was hell you wouldn't even have the little bit of happiness you do now,". But Ryou knew the truth. Ryou understood that in order to make everything hurt worst they had to make you think that things could get better. Make you think you had hope.

Perhaps he had died that night with his mother and sister and this was his punishment. Now instead of just protecting them (which he had failed to do), he had to protect the whole world from whatever lay in his ring.

And he _knew_ something was in that ring. He could feel it! Even when Ryou was all alone – he knew he wasn't. He wasn't stupid! Didn't this ring know the power it let out? The suffocating energy that it wrapped around him? Oh, how Ryou longed to just rip the ring off of his chest and throw it to the ground, screaming, _I know you're in there._ In fact just scream to the whole world that he knew the truth and that he saw through their lies and despite everything he didn't deserve this and – .

"Bakura! Are you okay?"

"Oh! Yuugi-kun, I'm fine."

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This is what happens when I decide I want to write insane!Ryou. Yeah, you know in the summary it said these would be drabbles and oneshots. This is of the drabble varity. I have to other chapters written...but I think I'll post the fluffy one next. You know, just to prove to myself I can post something fluffy.

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	3. One Last Game

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A/N Yes, I am posting two chapters at once, given that the next chapter, however short it is, is tendershipping and I know that's not everyones cup of tea. This is AU, what would have happen if Yami Bakura had beaten Yami. While I'm at this, I just want to think everyone who has reviewed! It really means a lot! =) Oh and this chapter includes death, both implied and remembered. Nothing gory though, MAYBE a 'T' rating.

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_Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something. ~ Francisco Villa_

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Ryou was losing. Which was fine with him because he hadn't expected to win anyway. He was still riding the wave of utter awe at what the spirit had done.

"Any last requests, yadonushi?" The spirit had asked.

(Ryou couldn't help but be bothered by the fact that he had called him yadonushi even though they were no longer sharing a body. Force of habit, he assumed. Like the way Ryou still referred to him in his head as the spirit even though the spirit was just as much flesh and blood as Ryou himself. Or how Yuugi had whispered "Yami" to the Pharaoh just as he died even after they had gone through so much trouble to find his name.)

The answer had come swiftly from Ryou's mouth, before his brain had anytime to process it.

"One last game!"

"Any preference?" said the spirit.

"No dueling," Ryou said, for obvious reasons.

"Anything else?"

Ryou shook his head and even though he wouldn't have been able to see his hand in front of his face, Ryou could tell the spirit was grinning.

"Let's begin."

And now they were sitting opposite each other, a game board in between them and only the smallest of candles lighting the pitch blackness that now consumed the earth.

Oh, and of course the spirit was winning.

"It's your move," he said, smirking.

Ryou shouldn't have be surprised because smirking seemed to be one of the spirit's defining attributes, yet the look in his eyes (his eyes this time, the eyes of the thief king) was just monstrous. And that surprised Ryou because lately he had been tricking himself into believing the spirit exactly might of had a soul.

(Everyone makes mistakes, he guessed.)

Ryou took the dice in his hand, and rolled a seven, much to his dismay. Not expecting yourself to win was one thing, but to lose so fast was disheartening. Even though absolutely everyone he had ever cared about was gone, Ryou didn't want to die. Especially not like some prey of a cat who had decided to play with its food before eating it.

It seemed fitting though. Whereas Jou, Honda, Anzu, and Yuugi had all died in a valiant way – refused to let go of their light and hope even as the last of their blood was drained. The Pharaoh hadn't died like that though, the spirit wouldn't allow it. He had died suffering with guilt and pleading for his friends to be spared.

The spirit wouldn't allow Ryou to die nobly either. No, Ryou would die here, alone in the dark, much as he had lived every since he got that ring.

Even though he literally had but minutes to live, Ryou couldn't help but appreciate the irony.

"It's your move, again," The spirit snarled, his impatience seeping out of him.

"I'm thinking!" Ryou snapped.

It was odd but the close proximity of his death was giving him courage. Not courage to fight the spirit, but to defend himself against him. Before when Ryou thought he had a chance, he would never dare saying anything to displease the spirit, but now… what was worst then death? Sure, the spirit could make him suffer but Ryou figured he was planning to do that already. Even though Ryou was to die a full blown traitor, he might as well die just a tiny bit of a coward.

Ryou moved his tiny lead figurine stopping on the square covered in candle wax.

"Can I ask you something?" Ryou whispered, not daring to look up.

The spirit pursued his lips. "What?"

"Killing myself, would that have made any difference?" Ryou was quivering, not wanting to know the answer but knowing he needed to.

The spirit paused, eyes flashing – not a dangerous way, but calculating.

"No."

Ryou looked up, and for the first time ever looked straight into the spirit's eyes.

"You're lying," he muttered, in shock. For why would the spirit resist taunting Ryou about the part he played in Zorc's return?

The spirit's eyes narrowed but simply said, "It's your turn. Probably your last."

Ryou, trembling, leaned in and curled his hand over the dice, clutching them close to him.

"I hate you," he said, surprised at how much truth could be in three words.

"I know," the spirit said, bored. "Roll."

Ryou did. Leaning in closer to the candlelight he saw snake eyes.

The spirit's eye twitch and Ryou himself gasped in amazement.

"It seems you'll last another turn," the spirit scoffed and Ryou nodded his head numbly in agreement.

The spirit rolled.

"You lose," he said.

Ryou didn't hear him. Ryou couldn't hear anything other than the beating of his heart. The loud banging in his ears, the sinking sensation consuming his whole body. Ryou couldn't hear anything but fear.

The spirit leaned in to extinguish the candle.

"Wait!" Ryou screeched. His mind simultaneously screaming _I don't want to die_ and _I don't want to die **like this**_.

The spirit glowered. "I already granted your last request, yadonushi."

"Please," Ryou begged, only now realizing his was crying, "I don't want to die in the dark."

"Too bad."

And the candle went out.

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	4. Belief

A/N **THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS TENDERSHIPPING. **There, you have been warned. I wanted this to come out as fluffy but it just...didn't. Gah. I've also notice a patterned starting, oneshot, drabble, oneshot, drabble. This would be the drabble. Review! Dedicated to run-for-your-life hikari, as requested.

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_There's a lot to be said for self-delusionment when it comes to matters of the heart ~ Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider._

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Ryou Bakura had always been very gifted when it came to denial.

Even when he was a little boy, when his mother had sat him down to explain to him that no, ghost or spirits do not exist and he should just give up on occultism (because it was really freaking out Amane); he didn't.

Instead, he flashed a polite smile and said, "I believe in them,"

And that was the end of that.

But even great gifts go to waste if you do not practice them daily. For Ryou, this took shape in his letters to Amane in heaven. And even when his father on a visit home for Christmas had discovered them leading to the fight that ended in Ryou's father screaming "She can't read them! She can't do anything! She's dead!"

Ryou simply furrowed his brow (politely, though) and said "I believe she can,"

His father hasn't been home since.

So as long the spirit of the ring would keep whispering words of love into his head during school hours, even after all the crimes the spirit had committed and all the ways the spirit had endangered his friends –

Ryou would believe him.

(He had a gift, after all.)


	5. Separation?

A/N I don't know if you would call this fluff, but it's not angst, and that's good enough for me! I don't really like this one but I hope you do. Review?

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_The trouble with normal is that it always gets worse. ~ Bruce Cockburn._

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It had all started a little over four months ago.

Ryou, after having had a completely normal day, was just returning from school. Ryou's school bag fell to the ground with a thud when he open the door.

"You," he said in awe and a hint of malice.

"Me," the spirit (who by the looks of it was no longer a spirit) said.

"But Yuugi – ," Ryou paused and took a step forward only to take two back. "How?"

The spirit shrugged, and arose from the chair he had been seated in. He began to walk towards Ryou in slow strides, deliberately trying to instill panic in the boy. Ryou eyes widened as the spirit moved closer and closer.

The phone rang.

Ryou dodged the spirit and quickly answered it.

"Hello?" he said.

"Bakura!" Yuugi chimed, "You're not going to believe this but – ,"

"Yuugi," Ryou sighed, eyeing the spirit up and down, "I know,"

"So Yami, I mean Atemu was right? _He's_ there isn't he?"

"Yeah,"

"What?!" Ryou heard the Pharaoh bellow even from the other end of the phone.

"Are you okay?" Yuugi whispered.

Define okay, Ryou thought feeling a migraine coming on.

"I think so," Ryou said.

"We're coming right over!" Yuugi declared.

"I don't think that's such a good idea," Ryou said, eyeing the spirit, who was scowling at him, suspiciously.

"I won't leave you there alone with him!" said Yuugi.

"Honestly, Yuugi-kun I'm fine. Besides I don't think he'd take so well to your presence…"

That earned a hiss from the spirit in question.

Over the phone Ryou heard Yuugi sigh.

"Listen you just try to figure out what's happening, mmkay? I'll make sure he's…under control,"

(Was Ryou the only one who thought it was ridiculous to think that _he_ could keep the spirit under control?)

"Alright, Bakura-kun. Be safe,"

"You too," Ryou said and after a thought said, "You should call Malik too, just to be safe,"

"Okay,"

And Ryou hung up.

Cringing, he turned towards the spirit.

"Are you going to kill me?" he asked.

"Not today," That was a good enough answer for Ryou.

"Are you hungry?" Ryou inquired, and the spirit shrugged.

(How could he be so nonchalant about this?)

Ryou took off for the kitchen, the shock of everything finally starting to get to him. The voice in his head that had tried to kill his friends on multiple occasions was here, in his living room, and Ryou was about to get him some dinner. Things couldn't get any weirder.

Only, they did.

About three hours later Ryou received a call from a frantic Yuugi who confirmed that yes, Malik's other personality had gotten his own body. Out of everything, this perplexed Ryou the most. The spirit of the ring and the Pharaoh had both existed outside of Ryou and Yuugi but Malik had created his other. (It only then just occurred to him that the other personality didn't have a name and neither did his own spirit.)

Ryou sighed and looked towards the spirit who was happily rummaging through his cabinets.

"Where are you going to stay?" he asked.

"Here," was the spirit's response, and Ryou's migraine was far too severe to make him want to argue.

"If I go to sleep, are you going to kill, maim or steal anything?"

"Probably not," the spirit said.

Ryou had low standards, and this answer meet them.

To Ryou's horror, when he awoke he found that the day before had not been some nightmare and the spirit was there, by his bed, waiting for him.

"Make me breakfast," the spirit demanded. Ryou glared.

"I'm not a housewife," he said, barely awake.

"We'll see about that," the spirit said, smirking.

Ryou eventually did make the spirit breakfast, as he had every day since. It didn't take him long as long as he originally would have thought to get use to the spirit's bizarre choice in food either ("You're eating that steak _raw_?").

It did, however, take longer to get use to calling the spirit 'Bakura'. He was hesitant at first, calling someone by his own last name was strange enough – but calling the spirit that? But the more he thought about it, the more it had made sense. He was his darker half, it seemed only fitting that the spirit take half his name.

It had taken even longer to get use to Malik and 'Marik'. (Malik had originally named his other that as a joke, most people commonly mispronounced his name, but it stuck). Ryou didn't like the pair for two reasons.

1. Battle City. Not only did Malik convince Bakura to stab him, Malik had been inside Ryou's head, using it like some sort of vessel. Ryou was not amused by this.

2. They were a horrible influence. Ryou spent most of his time trying to stop the spirit from doing all the things Malik and Marik did on a daily basis.

In fact, Malik and Marik would have still been in Egypt if it hadn't been for those stairs. Ryou had gone to the grocery store, about three days after Bakura's arrival. The stairs were slippery and he fell breaking his arm.

But he didn't just break his arm, Bakura, Malik, Marik, Yuugi and Yami (they had all given up on calling him Atemu, partly because Yuugi always forgot and called him Yami and the fact that whenever someone would say Atemu, Bakura got a look of death on his face.) did as well.

They soon realized that whatever had given the two spirits and one split personality, separate bodies had bound the pairs together as well. Whatever happened to one, happened to all.

(This put a bit of a damper on Bakura's kill the Pharaoh plans.)

This caused Malik and Marik to move to Domino, so they could keep a close eye on the other pairs. If fact, it was the sole reason why Marik and Bakura started attending high school.

Despite all of Malik and Marik's flaws, Ryou had to admit that they had succeeded in making sure Bakura didn't kill Yami. Not that Bakura needed a lot of convincing, he liked living.

However the lack of eternal rage didn't stop Bakura from insulting Yami every time their paths crossed.

That was fine with Ryou. If truth be told, Ryou had come to expect it.

(But then again, Ryou was starting to expect and accept a lot of things.)

Regardless of all the changes, some things stayed exactly the same. Bakura still called Ryou 'yadonushi' it was just more literally now. He still wore that black jacket that billowed ridiculously out from underneath him. And occasionally, Ryou would find things in their apartment he was sure hadn't been there before.

If anything, living with the spirit was better when they had separate bodies. This way when Ryou didn't have to deny things he knew he did and he could hang out with his friends without having to worry about some evil spirit stealing their souls. Always a plus.

Yuugi loved Yami having his own body.

"It's amazing how well everything has turned out, isn't it?" Yuugi said, positively beaming at the sight of Yami. Even though they still didn't know how, what or why behind the separate bodies, Ryou was beginning to accept it. This was his life now and he would life it.

(With Bakura, instead of against him.)

"Yes, amazing,"


	6. Of Letters and Promises

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_For every promise, there is price to pay. ~Jim Rohn_

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"I want Ryou to read it, momma!" Amane cried.

"Amane," her mother scolded, "I don't even know what letters we got today, so just hold your horses,"

"But it's been almost two months since his last letter! It has to be here, it just has to! Doesn't it Ryou?"

"Amane," the boy in questioned said, mimicking the tone of his mother.

"So kids, no letter," their mother said and by the looks of her devastated children hastily added, "Your father has a very busy and important job. He'll write when he can,"

"I'm going to be an archeologist just like daddy," Ryou boasted and gave Amane a bright smile.

"Oh," she mumbled, hiding her eyes behind her white hair.

"What's wrong?" he asked, tilting his head.

"It's just daddy never writes when he goes away – but you'll write, won't you Ryou? Forever?" she stared up at her big brother with wide green eyes. He laughed.

"Of course Amane, I'll write to you every day!" He reassured her, but the anxiety didn't leave her eyes.

"Promise!" she demanded, stopping her foot.

Ryou chuckled and then wrapped his sister in a tight embrace. (She smelled of violets.)

"I promise, forever,"

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A/N -The drabble was originally going to end with 'Two weeks later she was dead' but I don't know, I took it out. Was that a bad call on my part? Review!


	7. Interchangeable

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_There's always a good chance you could die right in the middle of your life story ~ Chuck Palahnuik_

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The spirit was taking over again. There was no warning, no sign anymore, the spirit was to use to throwing Ryou to the wayside.

(_He's like a mechanic, switching out the parts. I'm broken and need replacing._)

Ryou didn't even bother to fight it anymore. He welcomed the sensation. To him it felt less and less painful and more like sleeping. Like dying.

(_I am dying._)

Dying, death, dead had there been a time when each of those words meant something unique? A time when he had use those words separately for different things? He couldn't bring himself to remember. Dying, death, dead. He did remember those words though, just in a different way. There was a time when those words scared Amane, which Ryou could never understand. To him they were always meaningful and when she died they became powerful. But now as the walls of his soul began to materialize and cage him in he realized something profound. Those words meant nothing to him now. Less than nothing. It seemed to him that the spirit of the ring drained everything of its meaning. It did not hurt anymore to think about Amane dying, to think about her dead. In fact it seemed the most natural thing in the world to remember her as she was in her casket. Really, what was more natural then death?

(_I'm ready now for you death, I'm ready for you to take me too._)

In an odd way, Ryou should be thanking the spirit for taking the meaning away from his life. Now instead of remembering Amane as an untouchable ray of light and goodness he remembered her for what she was; a picky little girl with a short temper but a good heart. Ryou now could remember the little fits she'd throw or how her nose was a bit too big for her small face. Each day Amane became realer and realer to him, and each day Yuugi became more like a faded away photography. Surely there had never been at time when they had called each other friends.

(_It's not real. It never was real_.)

He should stop dwelling and dreams of things that were never real, that never could have been real. Yuugi was just a figment of his imagination. But he could have sworn he remembered his laugh though, how warm and welcoming and forgiving it was. Ryou could remember (when he tried harder enough) when the ring had put these awful thoughts in his mind. Maybe everything was just the ring or the spirit. The ring or the spirit and the spirit and the ring. Ringspiritringspiritringspirit. And it just didn't matter anymore which was which because they were interchangeable just like life and death and hatred and love and nothing was separate and nothing was real.

(_No that's not true, Amane was real. Is real._ )

Amane used to use the words life and story interchangeably. At first Ryou had found this idea to be fascinating, to be the main character in the story but as he grew older (and deader) he had begun to found this to be false. Yes he did have a life, no matter how hard the spirit tried to take it from him, but he had no story. There's was Yuugi story, in which he could have had a supporting role but now he was just an antagonist. An obstacle for Yuugi to overcome – and he would overcome it too. Ryou had to believe Yuugi would stop the spirit, because he had to believe something, anything. Because if he didn't hold on to this hope (tight, so it would never get away) he would be forced to be in the spirit's story. In which he played the role of the host, a sweet innocent body to carry out unspeakable horrors. A prop, something to dispose of when ready. Nothing. Less than nothing.

(_I just want to die already, why won't I die?_)

Perhaps he'd had a story once, centuries ago. Where Amane smiled sweetly at him, his father loved him and he was something more than an innocent face. A time when he was real. But something had gone wrong. Maybe his author's typewriter had malfunctioned or maybe the Fate's had cut his string too soon and had hastily tried to sew everything back up. Whatever the case, something had gone horribly wrong. Now his father hated him, and Amane, cold pale Amane could never smile again.

(_Who am I kidding? I am dead. Nothing. Less than nothing._)

If she could smile at him again, would she? How could she look at him now in the corner of this dusty room, in the corner of his dusty soul, curled up tight in a ball and smile? How would she even be able to stomach him after what he let happened to her? Big brothers are supposed to protect their little sisters. Big brothers are supposed to put themselves in front of harm's way, instead of rolling away and watching the fire start to consuming everything and watching the blood ooze out of their little sisters. Big brothers are supposed to always, always succeed when it came to caring for the little sisters – and he. He. He failed. Just like how he fails to help Yuugi. Failure, failure. Forever.

(_This is what I deserve. I need to be hated._)

Punishment. This was his punishment. Everything was his fault. He let himself put on the ring, he let himself lose control. It was he that agreed to befriend Yuugi and he that agreed to betray him. And it was Ryou that insisted that Amane have the front seat, right next to his mother, when they drove to grocery store and it was he that had lived and let his sister die in his place. Yes. He had always been the villain of this story all along. And all the memories were he had been good and kind and loved were lies. There was only him and the spirit and those words were interchangeable.

(_Hate me Yuugi, because I am him._)

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A/N I know I haven't updated in forever, and any one who reads this I am soooo thankful. I've been just really busy and out of inspiration. So please review because I am really, really rusty at this and need some positive feedback!


	8. Dawn

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_The most important of life's battle's is the one we fight daily in the silent chambers of the soul ~ David McKay_

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Today was a new day.

The sun had not yet fully risen, but bits of pink still pushed through the dark sky, signaling the sun's imminent arrival. The air was still crisp and bits of dew were on the grass, twinkling almost like the now dimming stars.

Ryou had always loved dawn most of all.

He had loved it when he was younger because it was at this time that only he and his father would be awake. His father would tell him of treasures in far away lands and somehow the stories always seemed so in tune with the rising sun. As if with every inch the sun climbed up the sky, his father would become more alive. It made Ryou feel alive too.

He loved the dawn now because it was at this time he felt the closest to being free. The spirit had retreated deep into his ring, tired after whatever atrocities he had committed that night. For just a few short hours it seemed as if Ryou was alone in his mind. Perhaps being alone and freedom had become the same thing to him now.

But now he leaned against the balcony, just feeling the dawn, being the dawn. It was beautiful.

(It wouldn't last.)

Today was a new day, but also just another battle. Fighting to keep whatever it was the dwelled inside the ring at bay. Fighting to make sure that no harm would come to Yuugi and most of all fighting to keep just a little piece of himself separate from the spirit.

Yuugi would be all right, he had the Pharaoh.

(And Ryou, he had the dawn.)

The ring glowed, and Ryou felt darkness creep back into his mind.

And he slung his backpack over his shoulder confident that even though he would loss the battle, the spirit would lose the war.

* * *

A/N Because I deserve to write something half-way optimistic. As always, each and every review is loved!


	9. Just A Day

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_There is just one life for each of us: our own. ~ Euripides_

_

* * *

_

Ryou woke up.

The clock read 8:07. He reached out his hand to turn of the alarm clock, thinking how odd it was that his nightstand had gotten bigger over night.

_Aibou, you must get going or you'll be late for school._

Ryou froze; eyes widening he recognized that voice. He recognized how the voice said things. But that would mean that, that -

The Other Yuugi, the Pharaoh was inside his head.

Ryou threw off his blankets (which weren't his blankets, his blankets were light blue not green) and ran down the stairs. Which was strange because his apartment didn't have stairs. He turned the corner and came face to face with his reflection. Really his reflection. White hair, brown eyes, everything was in place. If anything he looked better than he could remember. His skin did not seem so unnaturally pale and his eyes were free of bags. He looked...healthy.

This must be the most bizarre dream he's had in years.

"Morning, Bakura!" Yuugi's grandpa said with a hearty laugh, "Better hurry or you'll be late for school,"

Ryou smiled sheepishly and blushed. It had been so long since someone had greeted him so warmly.

This had to be the happiest dream he's had in years.

He ran back upstairs, so he could get change into his school uniform and start the day. No harm when it was just a dream right? Just a dream for a day. Finally, Ryou found his way back into Yuugi's room, and began to tear threw his wardrobe. In the back of his mind he heard a chuckle. But it was different then the kind of chuckle he was use to. It was kind and filling and didn't make his skin crawl.

(And it didn't seem to hate him either.)

"Oi, Bakura!" a rough voice called out, and Ryou recognized instantly as belonging to Jou. "Are you ready yet?"

"Coming!" he called back and hastily pulled up his pants. All while a strange kind of girlish glee seized him. He had friends to walk with him to school. As soon as he was fully clothes, Ryou dashed down the stairs, slipping his shoes on while he jumped two stairs at a time. When he reach the bottom he saw both Jou and Honda were there, waiting for him. Ryou smiled. What a great day this was going to be.

He waved goodbye to his, Yuugi's grandpa and followed the two boys out the door.

---

It was lunchtime, and he, Honda, Jou and Anzu were all just leaving art. They were making idle conversation that Bakura occasionally joined in, but most of the time just sat back and enjoyed the sound of their laughter. So far nothing had turn this dream into a nightmare. In fact, the dream seemed realer than ever. Maybe the life Ryou remembered (and was beginning to forget) had been the dream and all along this had been his life. Maybe now he was finally waking up.

And if not...it had only been a couple hours. What had Yuugi missed?

(Yuugi...)

"Oh hey guys, where's Yuugi?" Ryou was trying to hide his desperation, his need to know where Yuugi was. Because if Ryou was beginning to realize (with a strong sense of nausea) if he was here...

"Who's Yuugi?" Jou blurted. Anzu rolled her eyes.

"He's in our English class, he transferred here a couple months ago remember?" she said.

"Oh yeah," Jou trailed off, "It's a good thing you don't need a great memory to be a great duelist!"

"Ha, yeah Jou," Ryou agreed, feeling nausea wash over him yet again. This wasn't real. This wasn't right. He shouldn't be enjoying this so much. This was just a cruel trick by the spirit of the ring, just a dream.

(Oh God, please don't let me wake up.)

The rounded the corner and walked into the cafeteria, laughing and maybe even a few of Ryou's smiles had been genuine. The nausea had long since passed.

It was then that he saw Yuugi.

He was sat alone at the farthest end of the lunchroom, shoulders hunched over and his face twisted in concentration. With sick fascination Ryou realized what Yuugi was fighting. Ryou strayed away from his - Yuugi friends (because they belonged to Yuugi and not him, it was selfish to keep this going, but it was only for a day. Just a day) and as if being pulled by a puppet master moved towards Yuugi.

"Oh hey, Bakura-kun," Yuugi smiled a sad, pathetic smile.(Ryou's smile.) And then taking a second look at Ryou's disgusted and horrified face added, "You don't look so good,"

_He's right, maybe you should see the nurse._

"No! I'm fine, I'm fine," Ryou assured them both and sat down across from Yuugi.

The white-haired boy had never been a fan of mirrors, but looking at Yuugi was far worse than anything he could have possibly imagined. Every flaw on Yuugi's normally glowing face was so startlingly, because they were his flaws, they were his scars. The huge bags under his eyes, trophies of midnight strolls courtesy of the spirit of the ring. Yuugi's posture, clear signs of weariness and submissiveness. Even the smallest things like the reddish "dirt" caked under his fingernails. What's under your nails, Yuugi? Ryou thought bizarrely. You can trust me, I won't tell anyone…

He reached out to touch Yuugi's hand, and Yuugi pulled back abrupt and confused.

"Is there something you want, Bakura-kun?" he asked, nervously. Meek. Weak.

"There's something under your shirt," he said, almost spat out. No, Ryou couldn't see it. But it he know it would be there.

(It's always there.)

"What!" Yuugi's eyes widened with shock and terror. "I – I," he was stuttering now, scared. I know what you're scared of Yuugi, Ryou thought; I'm scared of him too.

"This is my millennium ring," Yuugi said, with sudden eloquence, pulling out said ring "My father gave it to my while at an expedition in Egypt," For your birthday because he didn't even want to see your face and hoped something exotic looking would make-up for it, Ryou finished for him.

_I have a strange feeling about him, aibou. I don't think we can trust him._

Ryou knew that the Pharaoh was right, that he couldn't be trusted because the spirit of the ring was stronger than he was, and the spirit of the ring was stronger than Yuugi since apparently Yuugi and he were one in the same, but the spirit had now taken control of Yuugi just like all the times Ryou himself had been forced out his body and forced to bare looks of suspicious from the Pharaoh because the Pharaoh knew like Ryou knows and, and, and.

Ryou vomited all over the lunchroom table.

(And all over Yuugi's blood-caked fingernails.)

"Bakura!" Yuugi's friends cried out in unison and rushed over to the barely conscious Ryou. He was mildly aware of Honda picking him up and swinging him over his shoulder. He was mildly aware of the spirit in Yuugi's body cursing him and the Pharaoh whispering words of concern and love.

I just want to go home, he thought. (Or maybe he said that aloud. It didn't make a difference either way.) I just want to go home to mom and Amane or the Game shop but not my apartment. Please don't send me back there my day's not even over yet. All I want is a day, Yuugi won't mind me borrowing his life, he's a good friend. Such a good friend. Please, please just let me have another life. I swear I won't mess this one up!

Ryou was beginning to see things. He could see now,(Anzu's anxious face) which became then, (Amane's smiling face) which became what never was, (Amane a grown women with gentle eyes) which became what never should be (Yuugi with the millennium ring.) And they all blurred together into nothing, and then everything and nothing again. All the while being intuned with this most horrendous ringing -

Ryou woke up.

(Again.)

The clock read 7:08 and Ryou reached out to turn the alarm off. There was blood under his fingernails.

And somewhere in the back of his mind he heard the spirit of the ring chuckling.

* * *

A/N In case you're wondering, the reason why Yami doesn't notice Ryou's increasingly crazy thoughts is because he doesn't read Yuugi's (and therefore Bakura's) mind. Only talks through a mindlink. That and it's a dream. Please, I live off reviews, so review!


	10. Burning

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_This is how we'll stand when/when they burn our houses down/this is what will be, oh glory ~ Let the Flames Begin, Paramore_

* * *

Everything burned, was burning and will burn.

These were facts, carved in stone with blood and bone. You must always be stronger, faster, smarter, if you wish to survive. Because given the chance, everyone (everyone!) would watch you burn. The thief was stronger and faster and smarter than even the great Pharaoh himself, and his plan was fool-proof. He would burn the entire world like they had done to his village. He would watch Egypt be reduced to nothing more than embers. And he would destroy the world before it ever got the chance to destroy him.

Yes, the thief could see it now, looking over the desert sands. He would become its master by becoming its destroyer. He.

(_**...**_)

They. They were raging. Hot lashes of fire to his skin. Angry at his resting, angry at his subtlety. The thief can't help but let out an unhinged laugh into the crisp desert air at that. They think he has forgotten what happened to them. How silly, how ridiculous. Even after all these years, they still have not come to understand that all he is (and all he ever will be) is them. Their hate, their thirst, their burning. Him! Him! Him!

They've calmed, comprehending that he can not move across the desert when they are in furies like this. They've settled, back to what the thief is use to, what he can handle. He could hear their voices (always.) even when they weren't raging. It had become something like a pulse to him.

(_Get up,get going,**avenge us**,get up,get going,**avenge us**_)

The thief closed his eyes (silhouettes of those sacrificed for greatness) and exhaled (the charred remnants of his village, his home.) And like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, he knew that soon he would emerge from the smoldering remains of Kul Elna victorious.

(_Get up,get going,**avenge us**,get up,get going,**avenge us**_)

And slowly the King of Thieves rose to carry on with his destiny.

* * *

A/N Wow. I can't believe, ten chapters. What a ride this is. Firstly I must thank everyone who has ever reviewed, reviews really do mean a lot. Secondly, it took ten chapters for me to write about Thief King Bakura? Hopefully, I'll be able to sneak more of him in.


	11. A Shade of Grey

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_The record of my unspeakable crimes, in previous lives, in previous times ~ Reprehensible, They Might Be Giants._

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* * *

_

It had started innocently enough.

A birthday present from his father, the archeologist. Yes, it had been exotic and beautiful it that strange way that only Egypt had mastered, but it had been normal. Ryou, over time, had become accustomed to such gifts, to such beauty. The ring should have been nothing more than something that would make a good icebreaker when guests were over. It wasn't supposed to mean anything.

(It wasn't suppose to be apart of him.)

Ryou fumbled with his tie, not because it was crooked but because he just needed to feel that the ring wasn't there. Double check. He released a sigh. These kinds of thoughts were what he was supposed to have left in Domino. He should be thinking of how to impress his could be future employer and not of things long since passed. And yet...

It had been three years. And still the spirit never left his mind, not even for a second. Ryou could still hear him (that voice, like a ghost, like a whisper, like a breeze that simply blew away); he could still _feel _him (around his neck, in the chambers of his mind, in the darkest depths of his soul). It had taken time and effort for Ryou to finally realize that the spirit would never be gone, never could be gone.

Ryou was the spirit.

To think that he and the spirit were one in the same, in all ways, was truly horrific. To realize, to accept it, was worst. Far, far worst.

"Mr. Moore," said the Secretary, as she had done for the last three people, "Ms. Decker is ready to see you now,"

A young man, maybe just a couple years older than Ryou himself got up and followed the Secretary down the brightly lit hall. Ryou watched him go and for a split second, hated him. He shook it off rather quickly because it was absolutely ridiculous, he knew nothing about this boy and it was most certainly not the boy's fault that he had never sold his soul to the devil for revenge a couple thousands years ago...

Ryou licked his lips, a habit he had picked up from the spirit. His Yami, his darkness. (Ryou had heard Yuugi referred to the Pharaoh as this once or twice and for Ryou it never ceased to be accurate.)

He chuckled slightly and was then immediately disgusted. You're becoming more and more like him everyday; he thought to himself and accepted this as fact because it was true. No point in denying it any longer. Ryou was like white paint and some child had decided to mix him with black. Perhaps the child hadn't understood that the moment you drop a bit of black into pure white, no matter how hard you try and how much white you pour back in, you'll never get white again. Only lighter shades of grey. Sometimes Ryou expected to hate this fact, to deny it as he had done so many things, but a soul was different. You can't deny who you are.

(Or were, or will be.)

The concept of souls and the beyond had always fascinated Ryou, so by extension so did the nature of reincarnation. He had always thought of it as very straight forward. Your body dies, your soul gets a new one, a cycle repeated until infinity. And for some he assumed it was. Yuugi came to mind, from what he last saw of him the resemblance to the Pharaoh was startlingly. Maybe a bit sickening too. But Ryou, he had not been so lucky. To think that he had been born without a complete soul still haunted his dreams. To think that the other part of his soul was (some of) the spirit of the ring still haunted his reality. At one time he had been a full person, nothing less or extra. A self proclaimed King of Thieves whose village had been slaughtered in order to create the Millennium Items. (Near the end, the spirit had been less protective of his thoughts, and the burning of Kul Elna had slipped by him and found its way to Ryou.) But there was great darkness in the Thief King and Ryou was hesitant to call it evil (but then again, what else was it?) that had taken control of all the Thief's motives and desires. Such a passion he had for revenge that he willingly divided a piece of his soul and mixed it with part of the demon Zorc, sealing in the ring. Reincarnation tried to continue its cycle uninterrupted. The result was Ryou, more than a body, less than a person. (He cringed a bit at that.) Looking back though, it now made sense why the ring had always come back to him, no matter how hard Ryou tried to get rid of it. The fragments of the Thief's soul were trying pull themselves back together.

The lady with brown hair and red lipstick next to Ryou coughed and he found himself feeling slightly dizzy.

He let out a deep sigh, but it was more of an excuse to hear himself exhale, to know that yes, I'm still here, I'm still breathing. With or without part of my soul. Would it always be this way? The part of his soul that had been in the ring must have been destroyed, so would reincarnation continue as if nothing had gone wrong? Or would it simply stop? If one part of the soul is annihilated perhaps it would just be best if all of it was. Another sigh.

Ryou prayed silently to whoever was listening that his name would be called soon. He needed to go home, write a letter to Amane, and have a drink. Above everything he just wanted to forget about past lives, forget about this life. He could sit forever thinking of all the horrible things he had done to the world, and all the horrible things the world had done to him. But Ryou was so tired. He could no longer pity himself or play the victim. (Such a shame really, because he had become so good at that part.) He just wanted to live. That's all he ever wanted, really.

Was that so much to ask?

It didn't seem fair to be blame for things had no real memories of, but it was the law of the universe. This life suddenly made so much more sense when he saw it in terms of karma. Life, the one he was living now (Ryou constantly had to be reminded of this as he was prone to forgetting), was a punishment. He was paying for a debt that he been acquired thousands of years ago. At one point, this realization had stung so badly he could barely left his head up. Everything horrible that had ever happened to him (that car crash, his father, **_that ring_**), he had deserved. But the feeling had passed now and he had long since been left with a perpetually bitter tasting mouth.

Sometimes he just wanted to scream out, "I'm sorry!" to anyone, to everyone, just so they'd know. If he could, he would take everything back. If he could, he would erase him self from existence. But he couldn't. What is done can not be undone, no matter how vile, no matter how horrible. So all the tragedies of his life were his scars to bear. It made perfect sense though, he was more of the thief than the spirit ever was, and these scars belonged more to him.

(Nothing less than you deserve, some part of Ryou reminded him, nothing less than the sins you've both committed.)

"Mr. Bakura, Ms. Decker is ready for you now," said the Secretary, with feigned kindness (is there any other kind? he wondered.)

Ryou arose from the chair and did his best to smile.

Yes, there is kindness. Yuugi had been kind. Amane had been kind. And once upon a time he himself had been kind. Sometimes he forgot this. Sometimes his mind was wrapped too much around the darkness in his soul. After all it was much easier to be condemned than redeemed. And he wanted that, he needed redemption. Even if it was small, even if it paled in comparison to his atrocities, he needed it.

(Everyone needs a reason to breathe, after all.)

* * *

A/N So that was my boring theory on the nature of Ryou, Thief King Bakura and Yami Bakura's soul. Which basically be summed up as TKB = R + YB; YB= TKB + Zorc. Reviews are complete and total love and are always greatly appreciated!


	12. Then

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_Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering. ~ Paulo Coelho_

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* * *

_

Silence.

It was deafening, and thick and black like the darkness. They both expanded, consuming him and finally confining him.

And then as soon as it had started it was over.

He tried to open his eyes, like he did when he had a body. But there was nothing to open and nothing to see. It just was. Almost senseless, but - but... Ah, there was feeling. Different than what it used to be, but there. Being. He was alive, what had happened had worked. What had happened?

Something began to change. That feeling was growing and he could, well he didn't know what is was, but it felt like seeing. His memories were leaking out of him, in such a way it made him remember what it had been like to breathe.

And then he remembered.

(What had happened, what he'd done, what he had to do.)

The darkness became thicker, as if to acknowledge its own presence. He in turned concentrating on the remember breathing and wasted lifetimes watching his own. Soon, (too soon) he had memorized every word, every look, every failure. He would not fail again. Even if he had to wait forever. The darkness agreed with him, but too late. Memories, feelings, souls, swirled around him until everything was one.

And then - there was just emptiness.

Now there was no one and nothing. Forever. He and the darkness - they - it searched desperately for something, but there was nothing to find. Nothing. Forever. Only this. Forever...

(Hours ticked away years, minutes decades, seconds millennia.)

Forever...

Suddenly, there was something. A spark, or maybe a sting. A blinding light pierced through the darkness, through him.

And then there was sound.

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A/N Okay, I have to admit the lack of reviews is kind of depressing me. But whatever, I have a question for all those who do read this, which chapter was your favorite? Why? Feedback is adored!!!


	13. Dear Amane

* * *

_The most common lie is that which one lies to himself; lying to others is relatively an exception. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche_

* * *

_Dear Amane,_

Ryou's pen glided across the lined paper, rewriting the line he had written so many times previous. It had become second nature by now.

_School's getting better. We've started learning about Ancient Egypt in social studies, and it's very interesting. Which reminds me, yesterday I got father's letter. His said that they have been finding pots and such almost every day and they think that they are going to find a breakthrough soon! Isn't that exciting? I thought you might -_

The pen fell out of Ryou's hand, caused by a sudden jerk. A chill had ran through his body, no - it was almost as if the chill had come from within him. He shivered and shook it off. It was January, these things were to be expected. No point in getting upset about. It was probably nothing.

_I thought you might like that. Father also says that he will be home sometime this summer. I'm trying not to get my hopes up, you know, just in case, but I'm really looking forward to seeing him again! It's hard to believe that it's -_

There it was again! That feeling, that coldness. Only now Ryou was certain it was coming from outside his body and it seemed to be centered on his shoulders. No matter. Ryou placed his pen delicately down next to his letter, and went to his bedroom to fetch a blanket. (These chills were becoming increasingly more distracting and Ryou simply would not have any more of it.)

The only light on in his whole apartment was the reading lamp sitting next to Amane's letter, but his apartment was small enough that the lamp had enough light to carry. It did however, create lots of shadows, dark masses that seemed to wiggle and squirm upon further inspection. That seemed to grow. That seemed to breathe. Ryou let out a small, helpless laugh. He was getting himself all worked up for what? Shadows. They were probably nothing. Finally, after rummaging through his room, Ryou saw what he had been searching for. A quilt, with all different stitches, some with plaid patterns, others intricate landscapes and his favorite of all a square with the names of everyone in his family. He made a mental note to tell Amane he still had it and bent over to retrieve it.

//What else are you planning on telling her, yadonushi? More lies?\\

Ryou bolted upright, quilt clenched tight in his grasp. He could have sworn he heard something, something almost like a voice. With a shake of his head, he realized it was most likely the neighbors upstairs, sound always traveled through the ventilation. It was probably nothing. Everything was fine. He draped the quilt around him like a cape and sat back down to finish his letter. No more interruptions. Ryou needed to finish his letter as soon as possible, he hadn't written Amane in almost a week. Besides, it was getting late and he had school tomorrow.

_It's hard to believe that it's been almost two years since I've seen him. From the pictures he sent me, he still looks that same. He even still has the same silly grin. He's really happy in Egypt, happiest he has been since you and Mum left._

//Happier without you.\\

Ryou cringed, for a second he could have sworn he felt someone whisper into his ear or the wind blow past him. But he quickly came back to his senses. A voice and whispering? Such absurd thoughts. There was no one here except himself; he was alone.

//Heh. Yadonushi, you are never alone.\\

Ryou clenched tighter onto his pen. There was no one here but himself, everything he was hearing could be explained. The voices were just neighbors, the whispering was probably just a draft, and the shadows that seemed to have a life of their own were nothing more than tricks of lights. Nothing. There was absolutely nothing to be afraid of.

//Oh, really?\\

Ryou's pen broke.

He let out a hiss of surprised, his pale white hands stained with black ink. Swiftly, he pulled Amane's letter out of the ink's way and raced to the kitchen to fetch a towel. What a mess, he thought miserably, I hope it doesn't stain. Ryou sighed heavily, it seemed as if the universe was dead set against him finishing his letter. He let the water from the sink run down on his hands a little bit longer than what was necessary, musing about this. It was probably nothing, just his own negative thoughts impacting his actions. Ryou wiped his hands on a towel and returned to his desk to finish Amane's letter.

(No matter what it took.)

_That's not to say he doesn't miss you two though. We both miss you and mum, so very much. But your happy now right? Are you happy? I hope so. I think I'm pretty happy, like I said school is getting better. I've made some friends -_

//Friends, yadonushi? Why do you even bother writing lies to someone who will never read them?\\

Ryou heard his noisy neighbors and felt that draft again. But he pursued his lips and drew his quilt closer to him, his new pen quickly picking up where he left off.

(After all, it was probably nothing.)

_I've made some friends, too. They're really nice and let me tag along with them when they play games._

//Go on, tell her what other fun games we will be playing soon. It's only a matter of time before the shadow games begin again...\\

_I really like them, but I don't want to be a bother. But still, I get to see them every day at school. One of them, Yuugi, is my science partner._

//Isn't there something else about Yuugi that you want to say?\\

_It's a very strange coincidence. Yuugi has a puzzle that is almost exactly like my ring! I told father about this but when never said anything of it in any of his letters. So it's probably just nothing. Still, rather interesting don't you think?_

//Very interesting, indeed, yadonushi.\\

_I have to admit though, living by myself is hard. I get really lonely and sometimes -_

Ryou paused, wishing that he had written in pencil so he could erase that last line. He frowned for a second and decided to continue on without white out. This was Amane he was writing to, he could trust her.

_I get really lonely and sometimes I hear things, like a voice. I'm sure it's nothing, but I can't shake the feeling that even though I'm lonely, I am not alone._

Ryou paused for he was shaking and he didn't want to ruin Amane's letter. The chill was back, even through the quilt. It was as if there was ice on top of his shoulders or snowy breeze wrapped around his frame. And very clearly he could hear the wind in his ears, although all of his windows were closed.

_It doesn't matter though. Like I said, I'm sure it's nothing. I'm sure I'll get use to it. I miss you, Amane._

_Forever Yours,_

_Ryou_

_

* * *

_A/N - This was born out of me wondering what Ryou's letters to Amane would be like. Diary Entries? Lies? It didn't turn out like I wanted it too, so that's why the quote doesn't really match up. Oh well, I never said these quotes described these stories, just that they were based on them. On the other hand, Wow! Fifty reviews! I just again want to express my gratitude to all those who review! THANK YOU SO MUCH! Review again?


	14. Good Enough

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_Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? ~ Abraham Lincoln_

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* * *

_

Despite everything, Ryou did in fact like the ring. It was beautiful. Mysterious, dark, enticing many times a day he found himself tracing it through his clothes. The ring was almost soft to the touch and always warm, always alive.

The complete opposite of the spirit. He was sharp, in appearance and voice, icy and above all lifeless. Whenever the spirit would take Ryou's form (twisting it, distorting it until it was something Ryou did not recognize at all) he could see it in his eyes. True there was hate, but only on the surface. Past that there was nothing but emptiness.

(Maybe he did recognize those eyes after all...)

The spirit snorted, Ryou could hear it echo through his mind. Dropping in on Ryou's private thoughts had become custom now and Ryou himself had come to mind this less and less.

He gave one of the rings tassels a jiggle.

"Do you think, under different circumstances we could have been friends?" Ryou said aloud, because that was what both he and the spirit preferred. Feigning indifference is easier when you are not being addressed directly.

No answer.

A small smile found it's way to Ryou lips. It wasn't a no.

And, somehow, that was good enough.

* * *

A/N I wrote something that was not horribly depressing! Review?


	15. And Ever and Ever

* * *

_I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad/The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had ~Mad World, Tears for Fears._

_

* * *

_

Ryou's soul was falling apart - in the most literal way.

The thick cream walls were disintegrating, dissolving rapidly into a sort of black mist. A huge roaring sound seemed to accompany this whenever a particular big chunk disappeared. The few scattered possessions that lay within his soul room melted into white glowing ooze, which then turned into the same black mist. All except Amane's old worn out picture which simply stared back at Ryou oblivious to the chaos surrounding her.

Ryou shuddered.

Almost have of his soul was black mist now, Ryou noted in apathy. The mist drifted and flowed away from him and towards the holes of his soul room. From where he was standing, he could see the mist leaking out into the hallway that connected he and the spirit's soul.

The spirit.

Ryou's face twisted into a grimace. Is your soul falling apart too? His glare weakened. Are we going to die together?

Cautiously, courageously, Ryou took a step forward pressing his foot into the white ooze. It flung it's self out of the way and quickly reformed to cage him in. This continued with each step with the same tenacity. (Ryou's head was beginning to feel light.)

There were no walls anymore, only a thick veil of black mist, tinged with hints of midnight blue on the ends of the wisps. The roaring had been reduced to a slight hiss. Ryou cringed.

"Oh, Ryou there's nothing to be afraid of, it's not like it's going to hurt you," said a voice, confident and self-assured.

Dazed, flabbergasted, horrified, ecstatic Ryou turned around to see Amane smirking at him.

Amane, talking, breathing, living!

Ryou let out a laugh. She returned it.

"I take it you're glad to see me?"

Ryou had no words, so he just laughed again.

(Or was it cried?)

"Come on," she bounced forward to Ryou, the white ooze making way for her. Amane latched onto his arm, the way she use to when they were children and she had wanted her big brother to go on an adventure with her.

"There are so many things I have to show you," she gave Ryou a tug, and he stumbled but swiftly followed her lead.

"You've grown up," he said in awe, because she had. She was no longer a little girl but a young woman. Her face had slimmed and she wore her bluish neck-length hair in gentle waves instead of the tangled mess she had as a child.

She eyed him up and down. "So have you,"

(And with some horror and pride, Ryou realized he had.)

"I've missed you, so so much," he blurted out, still being dragged.

"I know," she scoffed, "I got your letters,"

Ryou looked away sheepishly at that. She rolled her green eyes.

"Come on," she said exasperated, tugging on him more, "If you keep moving so slow we'll never reach the darkness,"

What she said held some truth, because it seemed as if the short distance between the ooze and the mist lasted eternity. Ryou didn't mind though. He could stay here with Amane forever. (And ever and ever.)

But alas, they reached the mist, _his_ mist as it was derived from _his_ soul. The mist hissed in either welcoming or warning, Ryou didn't know which. Amane stepped towards it.

"Wait!" Ryou grasped Amane's arm, pulling her back. Fear, the first genuine emotion he had in years, scrawled out all over his face.

She jerked away in mild anger. "You're not the boss of me, Ryou," she sneered.

"I can't lose you again," he begged, and her face relaxed.

"It's alright – it's just you," and she plunged herself into the mist.

Without a moment of hesitation, he followed. Ryou would follow Amane to the end of the Earth, no matter what.

The mist was just that - mist. It was dense, but Ryou could still make a few things on the other side. (The spirit's side.) There were many blobs of a goldish color and someone in red. Then, abruptly with no warning, the mist changed. No longer was it black, with very dark shades of blue but the complete inverse. Dark, but most definitely blue with black on the ends of the wisps.

And it hit Ryou. This was no longer his mist, but the spirit's.

Amane slipped her hand into Ryou's.

"Don't worry, it'll be easy,"

Ryou didn't bother asking what; just tighten his hold on her hand. He promised himself he would hold onto it forever. (And ever and ever.)

Not once had Ryou ever been within the spirit's soul room, and he couldn't help but feel some regret when he realized it was completely destroyed. There were only a few possessions that had not been totally consumed by the ooze. A few piles of gold, a skeleton… The spirit himself stood in the middle of everything, his mist circling and howling at him. He was wearing a red robe which clashed painfully with the spirit's form of Ryou's pale skin. It was as if he was wearing his own blood.

But what the spirit wore was not as horrifying as what he was doing. He was laughing. Not the sadistic chuckle that Ryou had come to know, to fear but a loud, echoing laugh. It seem to radiate from deep within him and more important than that, it seemed sincere. The spirit was actually happy about something, actually found something funny.

Amane was not fazed.

(Ryou thought he was going to hurl.)

The laugh did not stop. In fact, it felt as if it had been going on for eternity. As if the spirit had been laughing forever. (And ever and ever.)

"Please stop," Ryou pleaded so softly that he would have been surprised if Amane, standing right next to him, heard.

The laughing stopped.

"Yadonushi," said the spirit fondly, stalking towards them. "How nice of you to stop by,"

Ryou froze, feeling both petrified because the spirit had most obviously lost what little sanity he had to begin with and disgusted because he was afraid. Amane was alive – next to him. That meant he was a big brother again and big brothers aren't suppose to be afraid. Not ever.

Amane didn't look scared at all. Her face was pouting, she was impatient and getting bored.

"You both take really long to die," she said, crossing her arms.

"What?" Ryou gasped, turning towards her. She regarded him in a childish "Well, duh" look.

The spirit simply let out another laugh.

"Didn't you know yadonushi? Didn't you know?" he laughed again, coming closer and closer to Ryou.

"We're dying," he said simply, like it was the simplest thing in the world.

"About time too," Amane added in a huff. The spirit didn't regard her, his eyes always remained on Ryou.

"Even though you were so naïve, I would have thought that even you would recognize death,"

He reached out a hand, cupping Ryou's face. Ryou was motionless, transfixed with the horror of the scene before him. The spirit's body was dissolving, just like the walls of his soul room had. His body turning into blue mist that quite simply blew away.

"You were a good host," and the spirit smiled, as if the two had been good friends. The best of friends. Friends that would be by each other's side forever. (And ever and ever.)

And just like that he was gone.

"You're next," Amane said happily, sitting down crossed leg.

Ryou went to wipe away his tears, but there was no hand. He had no hands. Just arms that spilled out black mist when they should be spilling out blood.

He sat down next to his dead sister. She gave him a hug.

"Don't worry, it'll be alright. Promise!" she winked and Ryou gave a smile, sad, broken smile. It was the happiest he had been in the longest time.

"I believe you," and he rested his head on her, thinking this is how he would stay forever.

And ever. And ever.

* * *

A/N Dedicated to **Bakura's Guardian Angel **as requested. I hope you like it (even though it's not at all what you wanted)! In fact I hope all of you liked it. If you did then press the button and review! If you have a request, simply put it in your review!


	16. Hey Ryou, wanna go for a ride?

A/N Um slight chance that there might be some angstshipping subtext here, (which is crazy because I don't even ship that), but only if you want to see it. This was intended as friendship. Just thought I should give you a heads up though! As always, your reviews are what keep me updating. This takes place post-series.

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_A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway. ~ Fr. Jerome Cummings_

* * *

(Again!)

Ryou has gotten himself into it again. He doesn't know how, or why he's agreed to this (-yet he does, but the reasons are buried too deep inside of him, tangled up into something unfathomable, something to broken to fix-) because he has done this before and did not like it then either.

Their speed increases, Ryou tightens his grip on Malik's waist. The wind is blowing through his hair and the sensation is almost pleasant. (_Almost._) Then Malik makes a sharp turn and all thoughts prior to that are replaced with nausea. And, again he wonders why he ever agreed to take this ride with Malik, wonders why Malik would even ask him at all.

But then he thinks (losing himself for a second to the open air) that Malik must have his own tangled reasons for asking him too. For Malik is just as broken as he as, just as guilty, just as exiled, just as condemned. Perhaps the worst thing (that's an exaggeration, not the worst, not even close) is that their isolations are self-induced. Regardless of what their others (and Ryou refuse to see them as anything but shadows, and they were not the other halves of their souls) did previous. They have chosen to accept their fate and live their lives like the shells they are. Even though they have never talked about anything close to the nature of these thoughts that are invading his mind, Ryou can see it. Mostly when Malik turns his head to give him a happy smirk and lavender eyes meet brown.

It's almost as if they're kindred spirits.

Their speed increases.

(And Ryou clings to him tighter.)


	17. After the End

* * *

_Maybe I should hate you for this/never really did ever quite get that far ~ You're So Last Summer, Taking Back Sunday_

_

* * *

  
_

Two weeks.

It had been two weeks (and twenty hours, thirty five minutes, five seconds) since Ryou had returned from Egypt. Two weeks since the Pharaoh had crossed over. Two weeks since -

Ryou's breath hitched and for a split second he found himself unable to breathe. He closed his eyes and allowed the wind to caress his face.

Two weeks, he willed himself to finish his thought because his thoughts were his again and there was nothing to be afraid of (nothing to be afraid of), two weeks -

His eyes were closed tight, seeing only darkness. Fists clenched. Not breathing.

Two weeks (and thirty five minutes, ten seconds, eleven seconds).

Two weeks since Yuugi defeated him. Destroyed him.

There! It was done. The truth had been spoken. The spirit was gone for good, Yuugi had said that the ring was never to come back (even though he had said this before and again and again; and the spirit always came back, despite what Yuugi and his friends said, despite everything because the spirit had promised to Ryou that he would be a part of him forever –) and Ryou was alone.

He was alone.

Ryou let out a sob or a sigh of relief (he had stopped being able to tell the difference long ago) but his eyes remained closed. He looked almost as if he was waiting for something magnificent (and horrible, oh so horrible) to happen. It almost looked like he was praying. For who or what even he didn't know.

(But he did know, didn't he? And lying wasn't going to make things any clearer. Stop lying. Stop lying.)

It should be this complicated. The spirit was gone; he was alone! No more fighting for control, no more alienating himself for fear of something happening to friends he didn't even have, no more whispers in his head…

(He was alone, now.)

It couldn't be this complicated. The spirit had been evil. The spirit had been the darkness. Those were facts, those were simple. Sometimes, just sometimes the world really was just black and white and there was good (the Pharaoh) and there was bad (the spirit). Just good and bad. And to even think about justifying what the spirit had done, was absurd because it was so clear (painfully, perfectly clear) that some people just didn't deserve to be forgiven.

So Ryou should hate the spirit. So Ryou should thank Yuugi. That would be simple. That would be black and white.

(And the spirit had been gone for two weeks, twenty hours, thirty five minutes, fifty-four seconds.)

But it didn't matter how simple it should be, it wasn't. It just wasn't. There was no reason behind (_no_ he would _not_ say _that_ word) the spirit, no reason in this hatred he felt towards Yuugi. No reason other than Stockholm syndrome, no reason other than jealousy.

(And both of those reason were lies, attempts to justify what cannot be justify. To understand what cannot be understood. To make the black and white of grey separate again. No, the world would be grey to him forever. And just because the spirit was gone didn't change the fact that he had been and all the things Ryou knew then he still knows now. No, no, no. Those things were permanent, like the ring around his neck, and not even Yuugi could change that. Yuugi who had taken from him and it would only be fair if Ryou took from him as well, make him feel this pain, this ache – )

Completely unjustifiable hate didn't exist, though. There had to be a reason though, there was always a reason. The reason he wrote Amane letter's even though she had been died for years is because he missed her (he was alone) and he refused to let her go. The reason his father never wanted to see him is because Ryou reminded him to much of his dead mother and not enough of his dead sister. The reason Yuugi had befriended him in the first place was because Yuugi was pure untainted white, and white always tries turn grey back into white. Even though it's pointless, even though it's impossible. The reason Ryou was still waiting for that ring to return was because –

Because. Because! Because -

Because, it didn't matter. What the spirit had done. What Yuugi had done. What their intentions had been, what their actions had been . In the end –

He was alone.

(Anyway, always.)

(Two weeks, twenty hours, thirty six minutes, ten seconds.)

It didn't matter! It didn't matter! It didn't matter!

The spirit was gone and if it pleased Ryou he never had to talk to Yuugi again.

He had a life again; he was no longer a host to some parasitic monstrosity. He should be happy! There was freedom and he could live and do all the things he had always dreamt of (What had he dreamt of? He knew there was a time before spirit, he could feel that but after. This was after and he still felt…nothing. Hollow.) and he should be happy.

Oh God, why wasn't he happy? He just wanted to be happy. He deserved that, didn't he?

Ryou inhaled, held in, exhaled.

He was overreacting. He was just seventeen, after all. There was plenty of time to become happy, plenty of time to dream. Most kids his age still have no clue what they are going to do with their lives. There was no rush. The spirit was gone and life was no longer so definite. There was time.

(Just breathe, Ryou, one breath at a time.)

The cars drove by his apartment noisily and Ryou didn't hear a thing.

Again, he bent his head as if to pray.

_Yuugi thank you so much for saving me but I think I hate you. I think I never wanted to be saved in the first place. Some people don't deserve forgiveness you know. Some people deserve to suffer. You should have let me suffer._

(It had been two weeks, twenty hours, thirty six minutes, forty seconds, forty one seconds.)

_Spirit, I hate you. With all of my soul, I hate you. But you weren't suppose to leave, now I am –_

(He was alone.)

God, he sounded like a broken record. He was alone, two weeks, twenty hours, thirty seven minutes, and nine seconds, it didn't matter. Repeat(alone). Repeat(seconds). Skip. Repeat(didn't). Repeat(matter).

Repeat, repeat, skip ("Some people deserve to suffer for all eternity, yadonushi,") repeat, repeat.

Repeat, repeat, skip ("Everyone deserves forgiveness, Bakura-kun, everyone makes mistakes,") repeat, repeat.

Just a broken record.

He closed his eyes tighter.

(Twenty hours, thirty seven minutes, and twenty seconds, twenty two seconds, twenty three seconds…)

And it didn't matter.

He was alone.

The spirit was gone.

The Pharaoh was gone.

It wasn't fair!

Yuugi had been able to say goodbye, Yuugi had been able to say whatever he had wanted while Ryou had just awoken dazed and confused to find that he was alone. Yuugi had denied him everything!

Ryou, who had been denied the right to tell the spirit he hated him, tell the spirit that he forgave him or just tell him goodbye. And Ryou who had been denied the right for closure and happiness and everything else that he was entitled too, that he deserved but didn't at the same time and he was alone and it didn't matter! It shouldn't matter! Because the spirit had seen Ryou as nothing more than a vessel, something to use, and Yuugi had seen as nothing more than a vessel, something to save.

There! It was done. The truth was spoken. He hated them. Both of them.

He was alone.

(Twenty hours, thirty eight minutes nine seconds, ten seconds.)

This was the end. Of an era, of a life. Time to move on. Time to let go.

The spirit was gone; he was alone.

Ryou opened his eyes.

The sun was setting.

Slowly he arose. He would have to write his father and tell him he planned to move. It was not possible for him stay in this city.

(Thirty eight minutes, fourteen seconds, fifteen seconds.)

He would also have to write to Amane as well. And tell Yuugi, perhaps wherever he went they could write to keep in touch. After all (despite everything) he was the closest thing Ryou had to a friend. And the spirit, he could write the spirit.

All right.

He could permit himself to do those things.

(Seventeen seconds, eighteen seconds.)

He closed the balcony door behind him, wiping off his tears on his sleeve. Ryou would have to get on these things immediately. He had so much schoolwork to catch up on.

(Enough. He's gone.)

So much life to catch up on.

* * *

A/N This completely and totally turned out wrong. Ugh. Please review though, reviews are what keep me going!


	18. Rain

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_Healing rain is a real touch from God. It could be physical healing or emotional or whatever.__ ~ Michael W. Smith_

* * *

Ryou ran a finger down the sliding glass door of his apartment, tracing the rain.

(It was so beautiful.)

The dark clouds were billowed into something ominous and powerful, sunlight was gone, the world was cast into a deep wondrous grey.

(So, so, so beautiful.)

His palm pressed hard against the door, desperate for the sensation of rain. Yet, as always, he remained inside, watching only through his glass window. What held him back (the same thing that always holds him back, that will always hold him back) was stronger than his desires.

And then control was snatched from him. Only control. Ryou saw perfectly his body throw open the door and step into the rain. The contact was sharp and painful (and very, very beautiful).

The spirit withdrew from his body, and took form beside him. There were no words - words would only break whatever right now was. No, only silence and the sound of rain hitting the ground. They stood perfectly still like that (for a second, for an eternity) before Ryou worked up the courage to steal a glance of the spirit.

His face was solemn, framed by soaking wet hair, palms opened upward towards the sky. (What are you remembering?, he thought in almost childish curiosity). There was something hidden deep in his eyes, one of those rare flashes of almost kindness. Or maybe regret. He closed his eyes before Ryou had the chance to figure it out.

(Ryou did his best to commit every aspect of that to memory, anyway.)

The rain poured down harder and Ryou, too, closed his eyes.

(He felt almost cleansed.)

* * *

A/N The irony is that I am writing this when it is completely sunny out. Reviews are cherished, so review!


	19. A Surprise Visit

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_A bad father has never a good son. ~ Latin Proverb_

* * *

This was it.

Seven months of living off Ramen Noodles and working overtime for both of his two jobs to save money for plane tickets had finally paid off. He was here in Egypt, again, (he reached for something in his shirt, only to realize it wasn't there and hadn't been for a long time) and was at his father's digging site. Here, he was finally, here.

Inhaling, Ryou took a step forward into the blazing Egyptian sun.

(He would not let that breath out until it was too late to go back.)

The dig site was packed with archeologists of all varieties; some tall and old, others young and skinny. But they all bore the same look of steely determination and childish excitement.

"Excuse me," Ryou said, pulling aside a man with dark hair who looked to be in his mid thirties, "Do you know where I might find Katashi Bakura?"

The man gave him a rather nasty look, obviously not fond of outsiders.

"I'm his son," Ryou added, giving the man a half hearted smile.

The man blinked and then realization dawned in his blue eyes, "Oh, oh I see,"

He grasped Ryou's arm and pulled him further away from the crowd, "Listen, kid I'm sure you've come a long way but honestly Bakura is not as young as he use to be. I don't think his heart could take this kind of surprise. I'm sure he would love to get to know his long lost son but –,"

"Excuse me?" Ryou hissed, jerking away his arm. "He knows very well of my existence and has every since the day I was born!"

The blue-eyed man in turned responded with a cruel sneer, "I've known that man for three years and never once has he mentioned his son,"

Ryou's eyes narrowed and he lost his façade (or was it gained an old one?).

"Perhaps that's why I am here," he took a step towards the man, who had suddenly lost his confident smirk, "You will tell me where he is or I'll find him myself,"

"He – I," the man stuttered and Ryou pushed passed him roughly.

"Idiot,"

Ryou scanned the crowd, looking for his father. He shouldn't be hard to find, his hair was blue for goodness sake.

Then, as if someone had shined a spotlight down, Ryou saw his father. Tall, slightly tanned, striking blue hair and he was laughing with another man and thoroughly seemed to be enjoying himself.

(And suddenly Ryou's heart was filled with rage and hate that had long ago been defeated.)

He let out the breath he had been holding in and tried to compose himself.

Ryou had come here to talk. Nothing more and nothing less.

Plastering a fake smile, he walked with his head up to his father.

"Hello," he said softly as he tapped his father's shoulder. (The way he did when he was young and he needed his father to reach something on the higher shelves.)

"Hello, do we know you?" said the man next to his father, who was considerably more good-humored then the other archeologist Ryou had meant. Quite older too, he would have made a good Santa Clause. His father then turned, and almost dropped the pot he was holding.

"Ry, Ry – Ryou!" he stuttered out in surprise, while trying to catch the pot. The man next to him let out a jolly laugh.

Ryou smiled softly and allowed his father to try and regain his self-composure.

"What are you doing here?" he accused.

"You're not happy to see your son?" Ryou pouted, playing up the hurt in his eyes for his father's friend to see. He wanted that man to hate his father like he hated his father.

(Hatehatehatehatehatehatehate. It was like an unquenchable fire, burning a hole into his heart. He needed this. Ryou needed to be free of this hurt, this festering hate burn.)

"Well of course I'm happy to see you," he added nervously at Santa Clauses' questioning stares. "It's just, how?" Clearly, his father was having a hard time being coherent.

"I've been saving my money for a while since you never visit," Ryou let his voice tremble out that, "I just wanted to see you!" he smiled hard and hopeful.

(It was painful to think how true that had been not even a year ago.)

"I didn't know you had a son, Bakura," His father let out another nervous laugh. It was so fake and pained. So satisfying to Ryou.

"What are you taking about Jerry?" Katashi Bakura pulled Ryou close to him, "I've must have mentioned Ryou here. He's my pride and joy!" Another laugh.

The man, Jerry, cocked a brow and Ryou's father continued on his rant.

"Yes, he has accomplished so much and couldn't ask for a better son! I mean his doing excellent in college; you know his majoring in…" Ryou's father trailed off, squirming under Jerry's intense gaze.

"I'm going to be a teacher, _dad_," Ryou said emphasizing the one thing he never thought his father was.

"Right! Of course. It's nothing really, my memory just is not what it used to be," Jerry nodded and gave Ryou's sweating father a small smile.

"Well I guess I leave you two alone, you must have so much to catch up on!"

"Oh that's not necessary, Jerry. Jerry!" Ryou's father called out to the man, but he was gone.

Ryou turned to his father, who face looked like he had just seen a ghost. That quickly turned into anger.

"Don't you think you could have given me a warning before you come to visit?" he snapped and Ryou pursued his lips.

"How do purpose I would I have warned you? You don't read the letters I send, you never answer my calls. Honestly it's a miracle I found you at all!"

Ryou's father could only stared, brown eyes wide with shock.

"Don't use that tone of voice with me, young man!" He scorned, puffing up his chest in a vain attempt to feel less intimidated by his own son. "Just what exactly did you pay for this trip anyway? I work hard for that money, and you are not spend it frivolous,"

Ryou let out a laugh that wasn't his own, but let it out anyway because he knew it would make his father's skin crawl.

"I bought the ticket with my own money, from the two jobs I work," Ryou said, voice returning to its monotone.

His father let out a small "Oh," sound. "What are you doing here?"

"I just wanted to see you," he said, sarcastically, truthfully, agonizingly.

Again, his father's face shaped that "Oh,"

"Is there something you need? I mean honestly, a letter would have sufficed,"

"I told you, you don't read them," Ryou sighed and for a second the hurt he had been hiding began to slip out.

"That's not true, I read them! It's just sometimes I don't have time to write back – ,"

"I haven't written to you in over a year," Ryou's words were like a blunt and dulled, like his eyes. "For all you know I could have been dead,"

Ryou's father's face lit up. "Ryou I – ,"

The boy (because he was just a boy in the end, just a desperate orphan searching the world for some kind of unconditional love) in question laughed. But it was more his laugh this time, more broken and pitiful.

"You really don't get it do you?" he said and all the rage, all the hate in his heart seem to melt away. It left him feeling emptier and hollower than ever before. Ryou turned away.

"You left me all alone," he muttered to himself.

Katashi Bakura placed a hand on his son's shoulder.

"I don't understand," he admitted, "Isn't it every child's dream to live on their own? Trust me, if you could you would chose to live by yourself Ryou – ,"

Ryou turned around sharply, grapping his father's wrist.

"No, I wouldn't have," and the words were said with so much truth and power, his father shrank away.

His father cringed and then shook it over with a laugh. "I'm sure you'll understand when your older, Ryou. You'll see how lucky you were,"

"I am older, and I don't understand," Ryou said, unmoved. "Coming here was a mistake; I don't know why I did,"

(What had he been expecting? To come here to see a monster dressed up as his father? Or perhaps a saint?)

Ryou, brown eyes wide and completely vulnerable, took one last glance at his father.

"Do you even love me?" (Say yes, please just say yes. I can forgive you for everything else, I want to forgive just say – .)

"What?" His father gasped sharply. "What kind of question is that? Of course, _of course_ I do,"

(But, for once, both Ryou and his father knew the truth; he was lying.)

"I'm leaving,"

"Ryou, wait that came out wrong! Just – ,"

But Ryou's back was turned and (for better or worse) he was not ever going to look back again.

* * *

A/N Okay in my mind Ryou's family was like this. Ryou's mother was English with white hair and green eyes. Ryou's father is one half japanese, his mother was English as well and his father was Japanese and that's why their surname is japanese. So that would make Ryou one-quarter japanese? Does that work? Anyway, lame chapter is lame and I feel really bad about that because of all the amazing reviews I got last chapter! I loved them and just for anyway who is reading out there, I don't mind anon reviews at all. Drop me a review anyway you can!


	20. The Little Boy

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_You are never coming home, never coming home. ~ The Ghost of You, My Chemical Romance_

* * *

It was a perfect spring day.

Sun shining, a gentle breeze, chirping birds and blooming flowers. Everything. Little girls would be braiding flowers into their friends hair and little boys would be playing in the dirt and staining their clothes.

The little girl was braiding flowers into her mother's hair.

(The little boy was kneeling at a double grave, staining his new pants.)

He, however, did not speak with carefree childish words like all the other little boys. He spoke words with only coldness and understanding.

But it was _such_ a beautiful day.

The first true day of spring. People who were not particular close to the family but came only because of how severe the situation was would use this as a way to start their condolences to the father. "They're smiling down at you," or "This is their way of saying everything will be alright," And the father would allow himself a small smile then get lost in stories of those who had passed on. He never mentioned the little boy.

The little boy who not could feel the sun shining, or hear the birds chirping nor smell the flowers or relish the breeze.

(The little boy who was knelling and looking down at names carved in stone with vacant empty eyes.)

And then the little boy spoke with adult coldness and adult understanding.

"You never wanted to stay here with me. Either of you,"

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A/N Update back to back because I wont have time to update again until Wednesday. (I think it's hilarious that I am acting like that's a long time to wait for an update.) Plus I just love all your reviews, reviewers! Oh and one more thing - TWENTY CHAPTERS. -dies-


	21. Rewind

_Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. ~ Soren Kierkegaard_

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* * *

_

The millennium ring shines brightly in the sun, sparkling and captivating.

(He eyes it askance.)

Then slowly, hesitantly Ryou places the ring around his neck.

-0-

The voice promises to help them. Yuugi and Jou and Honda and Anzu; promises to help his friends escape. (His friends, Ryou repeats this to himself because it has been so long since his mouth has been able to say those words and he loves the taste.)

And he won't put them in danger. The voice is dangerous; the voice is made of shadows.

_I will not harm them_, the voice assures, _I am only trying to help. You need my help._

The voice is right and Ryou knows it. He had promised himself never to be a danger to his friends again, but how could he deny help when it was offered to them on a silver platter?

_Just put the ring on_, the voice cajoles and Ryou bits his lip.

They really do need to escape. And after all everyone deserves forgiveness right?

(Everyone.)

Could the voice really be trusted? After everything it had done? He grasps the ring tighter, eyebrows furrowing in the process.

(Everyone?)

Indecision would be the death of them. It was now or never.

(And yet – )

Ryou holds the ring up to the light, trying to examine it further.

-0-

Ryou opens his eyes, feeling familiar dizziness. Images bombard his mind and he takes a few minutes to sort out the ones that are happening now. The dizziness wears off just a bit, just enough so that Ryou can see Yuugi sprawled over the Monster World, board eyes closed. He is not breathing.

Ryou feels his heart shatter and cannot bring himself to look for the others who are surely in the same position. (Because of him and what he had done.) And some part of him is thankful that they will never wake up, so he will never have to face them. Because Ryou knows he should have tried harder to stop them; he should have forced them out of his apartment the moment they stepped in.

But it felt so good to have friends.

(And with a pain, Ryou realizes that that one sentence will always be in past tense.)

He closes his eyes, wishing there was some way he'd never have to open them again.

"Bakura!"

Ryou's eyes snap open.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi says rushing over to him.

The newest of all feelings surrounded him. Gratitude, disbelief, happiness.

(Happiness…)

He is happy!

"Yuugi-kun!" he calls back, just as excited.

"We did it Bakura-kun!" he says happily, violet eyes shimmering.

(Ryou thinks maybe his eyes are shimmering too.)

"Yeah, we did it," he agrees, smiling. Smiling because now he has friends, now there will be no more blackouts and no more of those shadows.

Finally, the cycle is broken.

-0-

(Happiness…)

Ryou is starting to remember that feeling. It had been so long. Living by himself was lonely and isolating, monogamous to the point of insanity. All days blurred into each other, some days blurred out completely. In fact, sometimes Ryou would wake up and not know how he had gotten some place or what day in was. In fact, sometimes it seemed as if the shadows in his apartment were moving. In fact, sometimes Ryou could swear he heard someone, even though Ryou was alone.

(Always alone.)

But that had all started to change around that day Ryou found a box waiting for him at his door. The set to Monster World. He had ordered it after his father had sent more money in his monthly checks than usually, but he had never imagined that the game would be so much fun. Of course at the time he had no one to play with, but simply admiring the lead figurines sparked enough in him where he could almost remember a time when life had color.

It was a few weeks after this that he had meet Atsushi. Atsushi loved games just as much as Ryou did and it had taken him another few weeks to invite the boy to his house.

But Atsushi was here now and Ryou was almost having fun. Ryou rolls the dice, or at least tries to but –

The world is blurring.

(The world is losing all of its color.)

Shadows take over.

Ryou wakes up some time later, dizzy and unable to concentrate for a few minutes.

Atsushi does not.

-0-

Ryou doesn't quite understand why he always has the ring on.

It is not as if he is proud of it. (Well he is, secretly deep down inside. Something about the way it shines in the sun…) not overtly so, at least. When he wears the ring, it is always hidden underneath his shirt. Ryou figures this is because of bullies, he does not want to give them another reason to tease them. But secretly he wonders if it is because the ring does not want to be seen.

Still doesn't explain why he wears though. It is not as if Ryou enjoys the ring. He doesn't particular like it at all. It is intriguing (and perhaps even beautiful) but it is also…oppressive.

He scoffs to himself, that's just silly. It's just a ring. It does have a will or mind of its own. He is not afraid of it. He could take it over anytime he wanted.

(And yet – )

Ryou never goes a day without wearing it, regardless.

-0-

There is a box waiting for Ryou at his door.

Pleasantly surprised he bends down to get a closer look at it. There is also a letter. Ryou already knows who it's from.

(He is still surprised though.)

Carefully, as he is currently unaware of the contents of the box, he brings it inside his apartment. He sighs heavily and opens the letter.

_Dearest Ryou,_

_I'm sorry I'll not be home for your birthday. We are just making too much progress for me to leave now. Hopefully this will make up for it. The man at the bazaar said it's called the millennium ring and had something to do will that card game you enjoy so much!_

_Sincerely,_

_Your father_

He hates that his father always signs his letters to him that way, but the reasons are too numerous and tangled to think of now. Again he sighs, but not because of disappointment. It's not like he had had been expecting his father to come home anyway. He lets his knapsack fall to the floor and begins to rummage through the box. His hands grasps something that gives him a sting (or was it a more of a spark?) and he pulls it out by its rope.

The ring. It is very Egyptian; Ryou wonders what it is doing here with him instead of a museum on display. Almost beautiful too, in a haunting sort of a way. The eye in the center of the ring pierces through him and for a split second he cannot breathe.

Ryou holds the ring up to the light, trying to examine it further.

The millennium ring shines brightly in the sun, sparkling and captivating.

(He eyes it askance.)

Then slowly, hesitantly, Ryou places the ring around his neck.

* * *

A/N This is the weirdest mix of all the animes, and the manga. Like monster world and the fact that Ryou voluntary puts back on the ring during Duelist Kingdom. Yes this chapter is written chronological backwards so you might want to reread this chapter frontwards (starting with the last section and working your way up) and see if you catch anything. Review, please!


	22. Like A Candle

* * *

_To light a candle is to cast a shadow. ~ Ursula K. Le Guin_

* * *

Ryou had never been so thankful for a candle in his life. Granted, he had known that the storm would be harsh, but he hadn't been expecting a power outage. He placed the candle on his desk and tried to get back to the homework he had been working prior to the loss of electricity.

(The candle flickered, sending the shadows into a sort of chaotic dance.)

It was literature, easy enough right? He just had to write a personal narrative. "The most life changing event in your life thus far". Ryou starred at his blank sheet of paper, and told himself that any snickering he heard must have been the wind.

(The candle flickered on, the shadows now resuming their composure and wrapped themselves around the light.)

The answer to that prompt was easy. But it was also unbelievable, frightening and tragic. Something best left unspoken.

(The candle waned and the shadows quickly pounced on it, trying to extinguish the light while it was down.)

Ryou found that scene to bear an uncanny resemblance to his life. It seemed as if every since he had gotten that ring, he was always fighting. Pushing back the shadows, trying to keep his light. Pointless as it was, because the shadows were stronger, (he was just one candle after all) because he had been tainted anyway. These thoughts didn't hurt as much when he removed himself from the equation and viewed the world from outside of his body. Away from things like emotions and memories and saw things as they truly were. He was but a candle that was slowly being blown out.

(And yet, the candle flickered on.)

Thunder roared, lightning flashed and Ryou felt the ring's familiar warm glow against his chest. Ryou sighed and took one last look at his shadowy apartment before willingly giving up control.

(The candle was still flickering when he blacked out.)

* * *

A/N This chapter = Meh. Okay so it's been ten chapters since I last ask this question, so I guess I'll ask it again. What chapter is your favorite? Why? Has anything changed, anything stayed the same?


	23. Balance

* * *

_You seem to be maintaining the status quo...well, that's not _so_ bad. ~ Brain Age_

* * *

"Hey, hey Yuugi-kun!" Ryou called out, running desperately towards Yuugi, Anzu, Honda and Jou.

"Wait up!" he stumbled over the sidewalk, almost falling flat on his face. Finally the four students turned around.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi exclaimed, a wide smile on his face. "Would you like to walk to school with us?"

Ryou just nodded, to worn out to say anything else. Soon they were all walking in stride, and the dull lull of conversation had begun again. Ryou nodded and smiled slightly at the appropriate times, but he had no idea what on Earth they were talking about. His mind was a bit distracted…

(There was a pain in his heart, like someone had a blunt knife and was twisting it deeper and deeper.)

Yuugi threw his head back in laughter, unconsciously cradling his puzzle closer. Ryou noticed Yuugi did this a lot, almost pathologically. Ryou did not like that at all. Yuugi's hands always blocked his view of the puzzle. The perfect, beautiful puzzle –

(Deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper…)

Yuugi turned to Ryou and smiled; a quiet laugh at Honda and Jou who arguing about something that was no doubt very trivial and not worth the effort both of them were emitting.

(…and deeper and deeper. Ryou had grown to love that feeling.)

He returned the smile whole heartedly. Ryou really did like Yuugi, despite everything. He was sweet and naive, like a newborn kitten.

(Just as easy to manipulate, too.)

Also, Yuugi always was something that was entirely Ryou. When Ryou thought of him (and him only, not the item that he cradled so delicately in his hands.) there were no traces of the spirit in his thoughts. That in itself was refreshing. The spirit seemed to becoming more intertwined with the undercurrents of his mind, so much so that Ryou struggled to notice it anymore. Not that that fact bothered Ryou. (How could it? The spirit, after all was inevitability.) It was just, refreshing to know that there was still a piece of him that remained untainted.

Jou and Honda were still arguing and it was getting worst. They might have been arguing with more heat for a while longer, but it had just caught Ryou's attention when Anzu stepped in.

Anzu always seemed effectively resolved whatever squabble Jou and Honda were having at the moment. Ryou had noticed (as he does with many things because when you are a shell there is not much to do but watch and notice) that Jou and Honda were very much like a seesaw. They were constantly teetering on the edge until Anzu would come and provide for the losing side, until balance was restored. In fact, Ryou had come to see life this way. Very fitting in a way, life was but one childish school game.

(And Ryou loved games very much.)

"So, how is the game shop doing?" Ryou said casually to Yuugi, whose eyes had glazed over for a second.

"Oh, it's doing great, business hasn't been better!" He gave another one of those smiles that were both full of happiness and compassion, but turned his head away signaling the conversation was over. He must have more important conversation to continue, Ryou thought without a trace of bitterness. And he too turned his head away.

Yes, despite the inevitability (of betrayal, instrumentality, redemption) Ryou did like Yuugi.

And despite the inevitability, Ryou would protect him.

(And him only.)

Ryou trailed along after Yuugi and his friends when they reached the hallways.

It was nice just being on the outskirts of their friendship. He had always known he was not truly part of their group (he, after all had a very keen eye and was good at observations) and never could be, no matter how hard he tried. That didn't bother him. Their friendship was like a bond fire, he was far enough away where he could still feel the warmth, but not too closed to where it burned.

(A perfect balance.)

And it had been so long since he had been given any warmth at all. He had frozen himself away from any type of friendship for a reason; he could not afford to lose anymore friends. That wasn't to say he didn't enjoy the figurines. Oh, no. Ryou loved all of them! He played with them still, even though some of them were quite old. It was just that there couldn't be anymore. His mother use to always say there is such a thing as too much of a good thing.

("Remember Ryou you must always have moderation, a balance,")

To Ryou's great surprise, they were already inside the school.

Alas, Ryou had to turn away from Yuugi and his friends to retrieve the books from his locker, which was on the other side of the school. He had science for first period, and his textbook was a requirement. Leaving the warmth didn't matter that much because science was one of the few classes that he with Yuugi Anzu, Honda and Jou, so he would be seeing them in a matter of minutes.

Besides, he was getting spoiled. He mustn't walk with them tomorrow. Perhaps he wouldn't even go to school tomorrow and just let the spirit have his way for a day. Then maybe his body could get a good night sleep for once.

Ryou sighed loudly; he was never good at making decisions.

He quickly filed into the classroom, taking a seat at the far edge so Yuugi and his friend's could have the middle.

(Not to close, he remembered himself; he must not get to close. He just might get burned.)

Soon, Jou and Honda walked in spitting insults at each other, Anzu rolling her eyes and Yuugi was wearing that small smile.

He wasn't cradling his puzzle though. No, the puzzle was hanging free and unblemished against Yuugi's school uniform.

They sat down in the seats that Ryou had assigned them even if they were unaware of that fact. Tentatively, Ryou leaned forward to stroke Yuugi's puzzle.

"I can't believe you managed to put all those pieces back together, Yuugi-kun,"

"I know, neither can I," he laughed, but his chest swelled with pride none the less. Ryou still ran his fingers across the puzzle.

"Tell me again how you came to have it?"

And Yuugi happily told his tale, the words losing all meaning when they reached Ryou who was still caressing the puzzle.

(Ryou closed his eyes; savoring that delightful shock and the fantastic knife twisting that followed.)

The puzzle was cool to Ryou's touch, and very smooth like river stones. Soon, it would be his…

(Ryou eyes snapped open and he quickly retracted his hands back.)

_I won't let you win, spirit._

("Hey, Yuugi would you like to come over to my house tomorrow?")

_But I won't let you lose either._

* * *

A/N I have been meaning to write a story to the quote for forever. I seriously mean that. When I conceived this idea for this collection, Midnight Musings quote and this quote inspired me at the same time. So many lines in my head that I had been planning to use for this quote have ended up in other stories. I am just so happy that I finally wrote it! Reviews are a necessity, I want to know your thoughts on this story. ^^


	24. Flail

A/N Takes place in the same timeline as Separation, because everyone has separate bodies.

* * *

_To move vigorously or erratically; thrash about ~ Definition of "flail" _

* * *

Ryou was panicking.

It was bad enough that the apartment was completely trashed and that Malik had spent the night after a fight with his yami (and was still here!),but add on to the fact that his father's flight had gotten in early there was only one possible outcome. Disaster.

There was just so much to do! He had to clean out the his bedroom, (the one that Malik had been so happy to destroy while Ryou slept on the couch), because that's where his father would spend the night. ("Yadonushi?") And he had to tell his father that he traded up apartments because he needed two bedrooms now that Bakura was here and good lord he would have to explain Bakura! How do explain something so bizarre and far fetched? Something like, "Hi dad, remember that ring you got me? Well, turns out there was an evil spirit inside. He placed my friend's souls into game pieces but his a lot nicer now that he has got his own body!" This was the first time his father had visited in almost four years and he was going to think Ryou was completely insane.

(And for the love of everything sacred and holy why couldn't Malik pick up his underwear when he took it off?!)

"Yadonushi!" Ryou was suddenly flailing about in the air, Bakura having simply lifted him off his feet. Apparently, the former spirit of the ring did not like to be ignored.

"Let me go!" Ryou struggled, letting out the most pathetic mix of cry and whimper. "My father will be here any minute and I need to clean!"

Bakura snorted, but thankful let Ryou fall to the floor. Without any hesitation, Ryou was picking up trash and putting things back in their place. Oh god, not only would his father think Ryou was crazy, but a absolute pig. ("Oi! Good morning, Bakura!" "Don't _touch_ me,") Not to mention Malik. How would he explain having both of them here? There was just no way, this was just too much to handle –

The door bell rang.

("Hey Bakura…did Ryou just faint?")

* * *

A/N This was almost too much fun to write, because it's so much different that what I usually write. Reviews are loved tremdously!


	25. To Watch the Fire Burn

A/N And now back to your regularly schedule program: angst. Dedicated to **Peaches-Destroyer**, as requested. May be some (easily ignored) tendershipping subtext, not sure though. I'm always bad at knowing what's subtext and what isn't. Oh and this is AU.

* * *

_Lies will take you somewhere, but never back. ~ Jewish Proverb_

* * *

The night is harsh and unforgiving - like his master's eyes.

His master is smirking; of course he is, because they won. There is no emotion, no happiness or anything that could resemble feelings (because feelings are signs of the soul and the boy knows…), just confidence. As always. The boy does not know what else he had been expecting. (The boy always seems to expect too much.)

He tries his best not to shy away from his master's stare, but to it frightens him. Everything about his master frightens him. His master sharpness, his coldness, his utter lack of everything. But tonight the fire they lit is in his master's eyes and there is something in there. Deep down inside those cold endless eyes. For a second the flames reflected makes it seems to be some sort of emotion hidden inside. But it is only a second and it is only a reflection. Like the boy himself is nothing more than a diluted version of his master; a washed out twin. And again he reminds himself that this is what he chose, and therefore this is the life he would lead.

(Nothing, nothing will ever change that. He repeats this to himself three more times for good measure,)

His master turns away from him, and he is glad (though he's not, not really). This fire tonight is particular bright, brighter than the others he has watch burn. The flames also seem more chaotic than normal, flaring up and then collapsing into themselves. It could be considered magnificent. Watching fire takes a special kind of person though, something that the boy is not (no matter how hard he tries) so to him it is just terrible.

The boy steps forward, trying to get closer to his master. He doesn't like being alone, especially after the things he had done today, so he longs for that closeness. But (of course, of course, of course, of course) not to close and always a least a step behind his master. There is that unspoken rule, that fully conscious order of "I will lead and you will follow," ("And I'll follow you, to the gates of hell and back again. You won't care though,") that seems to always command the boy's actions. He's a good servant in that way.

The fire flares up again, burning the brightest it has yet. The boy simply stares because there is nothing else he can do. He cannot stop it, for (his master) the fire is far too strong. He cannot save the people inside because they are already dead. And he cannot turn back time because if he could he would not be standing here thinking about it. So he stares, as does his master but for entirely different reasons.

(Or maybe none at all.)

The boy shifts his attention away from the fire (and away from what it is burning) and towards his master. So unlike the boy, in every way but one. They are identical, save the subtleties. At first that gave the boy hope, perhaps they were meant for each other in that way. Yin and yang. But time has passed and the boy is less of a boy then he was before and he realizes that sometimes there are simply bad people.

(And people like him, who are bad but do not enjoy it.)

The fire burns on, oblivious to the regrets the boy has for starting it.

The fire has no heat, the boy finally realizes, and for a brief second panic attacks his heart. The fire has no heat, his mind screams terrified, the fire has no heat. The fire has no heat. Again and again until the boy snaps himself out of it. They are so far away and it is an extraordinary cold night. Of course it would seem as if the fire had no heat. All fires have heat. He knows this as fact. The boy has the scars to prove it.

(But the fire had no heat...)

He shakes his head, white bangs obscuring his vision. The boy longs to say some something to his master, just to hear someone say anything. But he says nothing. And his master does not turn around to provide comfort to the boy. Or turn around at all.

(And that still hurts him, even though the boy should know better by now.)

The flames are not reaching as high as they had before, and the boy is very thankful for that. It would still be awhile until it was done, though.

He remembers the first time he saw fire like this, the kind that blazes none stop, the kind that illuminates the night with its glow. (The kind that kills.) If the boy had spoken to the people inside, he would have comforted them. He would have told them that he knows how the fire works and hopefully the smoke will kill them before the flames. And he would mean that, every word (because late at night he still hears Amane's screams, because late at night he remembers that he has been and always will be a coward.).

The boy's heart is beating faster again and he needs his master to turn around and look at him even if his face is twisted with disgust. As long as his master is looking at him, not simply gloating. He just needs something, anything, everything - but there is nothing. The boy wants to go home now, before the flames and the screams and the ashes, when he was acknowledged. Maybe even loved. But the world he lives in is only full of following, of watching flames, of regrets and of no befores and only afters.

(And this makes him weak in the knees even if it is only the same as every other thought that passes through his head.)

_Just look at me,_ he pleads silently, _just one real look. I need it, please, please…_

There is nothing.

There never was anything to start with.

And the boy knows he should not act so surprised, because he knew this all along. He was not lied to, everything he has done the boy did because he had wanted to do. Maybe not on all levels, but at least on a few. And that is enough to for him to be condemned.

The flames touch the sky for one last time, and retreated back within the ashes to slowly die.

Sometimes the boy dreams about leaving his master (about not having to say the word master ever again) and returning. He didn't know who to or where he would go back too. It doesn't matter. The boy just wants to go back to something that was familiar and right. Maybe if he stopped all this he could be forgiven. Be welcomed home with open arms. And the yearning starts in his body again, the wanting, the physical need for some kind of contact, for some kind of support.

There is nothing.

(- But the smell of smoke and useless regrets.)

* * *

A/N And one last thing - I have to thank all of you again for the amazing support of last chapter. Seriously, you guys and all your reviews blew me away! (I'm over a hundred now! =DDD) No, but you don't understand how grateful I am. Keep them coming!


	26. Storytime!

* * *

_So fall asleep love, loved by me...for I know, I am loved by thee. ~ Robert Browning_

* * *

"Tell me a story, Ryou!"

Bakura Ryou opened his eyes to see two bright green eyes staring at him impatiently. (He cringed.)

"Amane," he said words slurred and barely recognizable, "It's bedtime, go back to sleep...,"

"I can't," she whined, snuggling closer to her brother who had rolled back over in his bed. All the poor boy wanted was a few hours of sleep. "Tell me a story,"

(Ryou closed his eyes tighter.)

"Please," Amane begged, giving a gentle tug on his hair, "You tell them almost as good as Dad,"

Ryou turned over. "Amane, it's far too late for a story, we have school tomorrow,"

She simply looked up at him, her lower lip pouting and blue hair framing her overly innocent face. Ryou sighed, defeated. No one could say no to that look unless they didn't have a soul. "Fine,"

"Yay!" Amane launched herself into Ryou's arms again and twisted herself in his blankets. She rested her head on his shoulder. (He smiled.)

"Okay, let's see. Once upon a time," ("That's a stupid way to start a story, Ryou...well don't look at me like that! I was only kidding, geez,")

"In the sands of Egypt, the King of Thieves was being pursued by the Pharaoh's guards...,"

(They were both asleep by the end of the first line.)

* * *

A/N I think this fluff. I'm pretty sure it's fluff, and I'm so happy about it. Finally after twenty-six chapters this is something that you might be able to call fluff. Of course, the quote in context of the story refers to sibling love, not lovers. Review, pretty please?


	27. Trapped

_Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. ~ Albert Einstein _

_

* * *

_

When he opened his eyes again, he knew he had lost.

The last thing Ryou could remember was the ring glowing, the pain and that laughter. And he knew that he had lost.

(Regardless, he still ran to the door trying to get out.)

"Let me out!" Ryou screamed, pounding against the door. "You can't do this!"

And that last part made Ryou feel worst, like a child who had a misbehaved and needed to be sent to his room. When in reality Ryou had been locked inside his own mind so that the spirit (or whatever he – it was) could steal his body.

(He stopped pounding on the door because of this.)

He was trapped. There was no denying this. Whatever that thing, that manifestation in the darkest corners of his mind (his soul to more precise) was stronger than he was. Resistance was pointless. Everything was on Yuugi's shoulders now.

(Ryou had faith, though.)

He turned away from the door after finally realizing that no, glaring on the door with all his might would not make it open.

Needless to say, Ryou was rather disappointed at the physical manifestation of his soul. His soul room.

(It was plain.)

The walls were a light blue, the color of the sky, but were coated with a thin layer of dust. A lamp was hung from the ceiling, illuminating the windowless room. There was a bed, directly in front of the door. Ryou bit his lip, it was the bed he had when he was a child, before all the moving. (And before something else, too.) It had white sheets with light blue sheets around the pillows but no blanket. There were many things hung up on the wall, all in perfectly straight rows and columns. Hesitantly, (which Ryou would later scorn himself for. This was his soul, there was nothing to be afraid of) he walked towards the right wall.

There were only pictures on this wall and they too were coated with dust. He leaned towards the frame that was placed dead center in the wall. It was grayscale, dustier than the others. His father was laughing, wrapping an arm around his mother who was giving a small smile. Below them was Ryou smiling like his mother and Amane playfully messing with his hair. Ryou inhaled sharply, and took the sleeve of his arm to wipe the dust from the picture. It didn't come off.

(So he stopped trying.)

Only a couple other pictures were grayscale (Atsushi playing monster world, his tenth grade school photo, and a picture of the desert) and only the picture of Yuugi with his friends did not have the dust the others had. Most were simply snapshots of things that had been important, but he did not see the use of them now. Ryou scanned for another second but when he saw that nothing else of interest was here he turned away.

The past was in the past and he would not (could not) dwell on it.

The left wall had frames too, all hung in that perfect order, but most frames did not hold photographs. The last column on the right had framed Monster World figurines and the first column consisted entirely of drawings Ryou made as a child. Directly in the center of this wall, was a mirror. He couldn't see his reflection though, because of the dust. Above that was the millennium ring (Ryou shivered, even if he knew that it was obviously not the real one) and to the right of that an article about the new museum exhibit. Starting from the center, Ryou could see that in some strange way everything in the frames was connected to each other. But even knowing that, there were so many oddities the frames held, Ryou simply could not believe they were all significant enough to house his soul.

He sighed and retreated to his bed. There was nothing to do now but wait. Ryou leaned his head against the pillow, but instead of something soft and fluffy his head meant a small hard chest.

Curious (and not at all frightened, he lied to himself) he pulled the chest from the pillow case. And like Pandora, he opened it to reveal hundreds of letters. Amane's letters.

(Though his heart sank like a brick in water somehow he didn't feel as alone.)

Clutching the letters, Ryou closed his eyes and lay back down on his bed wondering when the spirit would let him out.

(_**...**_)

That was odd. For a second he swore he heard an echo.

-0-

When he opened his eyes again, he realized that falling asleep had been a mistake.

Any sense of time Ryou had before was now forever lost. How long had he been sleeping for, seconds, minutes, hours?

(And of course there was that part of him that was screaming centuries, but he, like everything else, repressed it.)

Ryou stood up, suddenly overcome with that sinking dread feeling and loneliness. The world could be ending outside and he would have no idea. He was completely isolated, completely detached from the world. There was nothing he knew about the world right now. Yuugi could be dead. He could be dead.

He pressed his hand against the door and begged for it to open. Begged for it to let him out.

(_**Let me out**_**,** the walls echoed,_**please let me out.**_)

Ryou let out a cry of surprise, but quickly calmed himself. Those were simply his thoughts; there was nothing to be afraid of.

(_**Nothing to be afraid of…**_)

Ryou cringed. With nothing else to do, he was trapped after all, he crawled back into bed. The millennium ring frame caught his eye and his gaze traveled to the right of it.

That was odd. Why would there be an empty frame on his wall?

(_**Be afraid of…**_)

-0-

When he opened his eyes again, he found himself not to be in his apartment.

A surge of panic bolted Ryou upright but he quickly calmed himself. Why was he acting so scared? There was nothing to be afraid of. (For a split second, it sounded to Ryou like he heard an echo.) He had just moved, and combined with the fact that he could still feel the lingering dread of a nightmare (something about a boy and his puzzle and himself but not himself…) he was just overacting.

He shook his head and allowed a few more seconds in bed to really wake himself up. The feeling of dread did not pass. Something still felt wrong.

This room that he was in was not his new apartment. He was sure of this.

(Wasn't he?)

Ryou turned his attention to the walls, every inched filled with frames. One wall had all rather dusty pictures, pictures he recognized, pictures of his life (and one empty frame that strangely had less dust than the others). The other wall had frames too, but didn't have pictures.

He pursued his lips, and despite every inclination of his body, walked towards this wall. Were those figurines from that Monster World game he had just order? And that one, right above the mirror, was the millennium ring his father had given not too long ago.

Surely this must be his apartment. There were no other possibilities. He obviously must not have gotten a good night's sleep and that's why the room looks so unfamiliar. Shaking his head and scolding himself for such a stupid reaction, Ryou tried to open the door.

It didn't budge.

(Ryou's palms began to sweat.)

"Hello! Can anyone hear me?" he cried out, hoping that his new apartment complexes' walls were thin and somebody would hear him. "I'm trapped!"

"Could someone please let me out!"

(_**Please let me out…**_)

Ryou let out a gasped as the light blue walls of this prison began to vibrate.

(_**Please, please let me out…**_)

Ryou's breathing became uneven and he struggled to keep himself from tears. This is not happening he assured himself, this is a dream. Wake up! Wake up!

(_**Please, please let me out, please, please let me out…**_)

"Who are you?" He shouted at the door, tears pushing out from his eyes. "Leave me alone!"

(_**Alone, alone, alone…**_)

Ryou jerked the door open with all his might, trying to get away from that voice. That horrible, horrible voice. It seemed to be getting closer, like the room itself was getting smaller. Closing in on him, soon it would devour him!

(_**Let me out…**_)

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" he covered his ears, but still that voice, a twisted version of his own made it through.

(_**Please, please let me out…**_)

No, he had to get out! He screamed and the sound echoed through the walls, even though Ryou did not open his mouth. The boy charged at the walls, trying to force them to stop talking, trying to get out of the room. He clawed at the wall; peeling away it's light blue paint and dust. He clawed at the wall; peeling away the skin from his finger tips.

(_**Let me out, let me out, let me out…**_)

Ryou shrieked– it was high pitched, gurgled and completely undignified. He fell to the floor in a dead faint a few seconds later.

(_**Please, please let me out, please, please let me out, please, please let me out…**_)

-0-

When he opened his eyes again, he did not know where he was. Ryou was on the ground, which was weird because it was always Amane that didn't want to sleep in her bed not him. (He was always a good boy.)

He stood up, slowly feeling extremely uncomfortable with his body. Ryou looked at his arms, they were so long. Did he grow overnight? His mother said that this would happen, he would wake up one day and be big but she said it wouldn't be until he was much older.

Ryou scratched his head, confused about what he was doing in such a strange room. The walls had scattered frames on them and lots of dust imprints like someone had just taken some pictures down. He knew some of them, like that bright and colorful picture of his family in the center of the wall. So he must know this room…

There was a bed too, his bed. But it wasn't his room. He walked closer, curious and not the least bit frightened, and saw a bunch of letters all of the bed. Delicately, he picked one up.

Dear Amane, it read but the date was all wrong. It was almost ten years from now!

Unless…

Ryou looked down at his arms; they weren't just longer but older too. There was a name for this, he remembered his father talking about it. Was it amnesica? Amnesia? Anlesia? Something like that. His father said it was when you lose your memories.

(Ryou looked at the mostly empty walls, wondering how much he had forgotten.)

He took a step for the door; he was going to have to go straight to an adult for help.

But the door didn't open.

Ryou pouted. "Hello? Could someone please let me out?"

(_**Let me out…**_)

Ryou's eyes widened. The walls talked.

The walls _talked_.

That was so awesome!

He placed a hand to the walls, right over some small red streaks on the light blue paint.

"Hello, my name's Bakura Ryou! I think I'm trapped. Could you please let me out?"

(_**Let me out**_, the walls rumbled.)

Suddenly, Ryou was uneasy and he dropped his hands from the walls.

"Yes," he said, trying to remain assertive like the way his father had taught him when he was dealing with someone mean, "I can't get out,"

(_**Can't…please, please let me out…nothing to be afraid…**_)

The last of the frames on the wall disappeared and Ryou let out a startled cry.

(_**Can't get out…**_)

The walls were moving. Crawling, inching toward him. With each breath he took the walls swelled and with each breath he let out they stayed in place. (Ryou began to cry.)

The bed had melted into the floor and it too was crawling towards him. Each breath he let out the bed goo would creep up his leg and with each breath he took the goo would solidify. (Ryou began to die.)

(_**Can't get out…**_)

And then everything was upon him.

-0-

When he opened his eyes, he knew he was lost.

The boy arose from the middle of the unknown floor of an empty room. Where was he? He tried to remember what he had last been doing, but found nothing but haze and fog. Oh gosh, he couldn't remember anything, not even his own name.

The room was not bringing up any memories either. It was completely empty, save a small light on the ceiling. The walls were light blue like a child's room. Is that where he was, a child's room?

Oh, thank goodness! There was a door right there now all he had to do was get out of this room and find someone who would help – .

The door did not open, didn't even budge.

"Hello? Can anyone hear me?" he called out with trace of desperation, "I'm trapped. Can someone please let me out?"

(_**Please let me out**_, the walls answered back, _**let me out.**_)

"Hello! Who's there?" Panic consumed the boy's heart, but he quickly calmed himself. Surely everything seemed worst because he couldn't remember anything, his mind was playing tricks on him. He hadn't heard a voice. Really, there was nothing to be afraid of.

(_**Be afraid of…**_)

* * *

A/N That has to be the longest thing I've ever written. If you liked it, review! Because you all know how much I love reviews!


	28. Victories and Losses

* * *

Chess is mental torture. ~ Garry Kasparov

* * *

The spirit of ring was in a great mood.

(Ryou was sulking.)

For many reasons he would admit to himself, not to mention all the ones he wouldn't. But the main ones being: 1) The spirit of the ring was happy (and that was never a good thing). 2) The spirit of the ring had decided to share his good mood with Ryou in the latter's soulroom and challenge Ryou to a game of chess. 3) Ryou was losing.

(Not that number three matter in the long run. But still.)

"You're a very ungrateful little landlord. I thought you would enjoy the company."

And the spirit says that with the tone of smirking, without smirking which is probably what Ryou hates most about the whole ordeal. Even more so than the chess metaphors that the spirit loves rubbing in his face. (Ryou has known for a long time he's just a pawn, he doesn't care anymore.) Something about that glint in the spirit's eyes or how his voice drips with contempt, just infuriates him. Ryou much prefers the spirit as a brooding voice in the back of his head to the "happy" one siting across from him now.

(All that frustration leads to Ryou saying -)

"I'm not ungrateful. You're just a lousy tenant."

And it's true, because Ryou still remembers the "wishes" the spirit had granted him in the form of friends in never-ending comas and more figurines than he could handle. Ryou hopes that will anger him, so that Ryou would feel better. It doesn't. The spirit just chuckles; he found Ryou's small acts of defiance to be rather amusing, like a kitten trying to pretend it was a tiger.

(And Ryou knows this, but he also knows that small victories where better than none.)

Ryou moves a pieces, and tries to pretend no meaning lies behind it, tries to pretend that this is just a game.

(A laugh followed by "You are my favorite game to play, yadonushi.")

Ryou sighs, and pushes his pawn to make room for his bishop. Quickly, the spirit's knight takes his bishop.

The spirit smirks, revealing sharp canine teeth.

"Checkmate."

(Ryou tries to pretend this doesn't mean anything either.)

* * *

A/N I wanted to make nicer soul room experience for Ryou. It lead to this. I don't know how, either. Reviews are adored!


	29. A Different Kind of Strength

* * *

_Nothing is so strong as gentleness. Nothing is so gentle as real strength. ~ Frances De Sales_

* * *

"Those guys are such jerks," Anzu huffed out, "I can't believe they tried to do that to you."

"Yeah," Ryou agreed, and ran a hand through his hair, cringing at the thought. Ushio and his band of unremarkable thugs had almost flushed Ryou's head down the toilet and he was pretty sure that they had planned to do a lot more than that afterwards.

"It's okay, Bakura-kun, they pick on me to," Yuugi said, giving Ryou a comforting pat on the shoulder.

"I guess it was a good thing you too have us, then!" Jou laughed and playfully wrapped his arm around Yuugi.

"Yeah," Ryou agreed.

(But didn't.)

Everyone always underestimated Ryou.

It wasn't that he didn't appreciate Honda and Jou for saving him from Ushio and his gang of thugs. He was really grateful, flattered even that they cared so much to do so. But the thing was, he really didn't need saving. He could have handled it.

Maybe not in the way they Honda and Jou had, or even the way the Voice in the back of his head recommended. But in his own way.

(He had been handling things his own way for quite some time.)

One of Ryou's earliest most vivid memories was the first day of preschool.

He had been petrified, not only was he going someplace completely knew, but also he was going completely alone. Amane wasn't starting school until the next year.

(And Ryou had never been good at making friends like Amane was.)

The schoolroom had been very colorful, filled with bright posters on the wall and pictures students had drawn.

(But it had also been very empty.)

When his mother had left, Ryou instinctively shied away to the darkest corner of the room while the other kids played getting ready to start the day. Instincts, he would realize later, had to be one of the greatest keys to life. After all, some people are natural born predators.

He doesn't remember that little boy's name anymore, but Ryou can still see him in his mind as if he were looking right at him at this very moment.

The boy certainly hadn't looked like a five year old, that's for sure. He was bigger than most second graders and there was a large scar over his right eyebrow. His blue eyes were like daggers, looking straight into them made Ryou feel as if he was being impaled.

Instinctively, the boy had been drawn to Ryou's dark corner where he had been trying to complete a puzzle.

(After all, some people are natural born prey.)

Ryou would admit to himself that after this the memory became a little fuzzy and only bits and pieces were clear. For instance, he can remember clearly when the boy he asked Ryou what he was doing and the sensation of pain and tasting blood in his mouth but he was not at all sure how he got from point A to point B.

Not that it matter, really, because he could still remember perfectly the one part that counted.

(What he did after.)

He had cried instantly, more from the shock of such pain than anything else, but Ryou had quickly calmed himself and wiped away his tears. Then he wiped the blood from his mouth and looked up at the boy.

He was grinning, ear to ear.

Ryou had simply shaken his head, gathered his puzzle, and walked away.

He never told his teacher, or his parents, or Amane.

(He hadn't needed to.)

The boy had never come near Ryou again.

"I wish the teachers would just expel Ushio already," Yuugi said, scowling, "How does he get away with hurting so many people?"

Anzu responded, but Ryou didn't really pay attention to what she said. Yuugi's words had already taken control of his thoughts.

Many people got away with hurting others, far more than what would be fair. Every school Ryou had ever been to there was that "he", that "he" that could get away with whatever "he" wanted at the costs of others. And, instinctively, they always found him.

The bully from his first year of Junior High stood out the most though, because that was when it finally escalated from pushing, naming calling and things of that nature to punches and black eyes. What had his name been again? Miki? Makoto?

Makoto, yes, he was pretty sure his name had been Makoto. He had dark brown eyes and really big fists and that was really all Ryou could remember about him. Again, it didn't really matter because he was just another bully in the sea, and it was more what he did and not why he did it.

It had been the third month of the year when Makoto had beaten Ryou to a pulp. His body had been covered in bruises, a tooth had fallen out and he had a black eye. He had been so proud of himself though. The entire time that Makoto had beaten him up Ryou never once screamed, cried, begged him to stop or fought back.

Ryou was better than that.

(Ryou was stronger than that.)

Makoto never bothered Ryou again after that.

And that's what Jou and Honda didn't understand, could never understand. To be strong you don't need to attack. Rocks are strong, and for the most part they only sat in one place, unmoved and unchanged. You had to be like a rock. Because the wind can howl at a rock, but it does not move. Rain can pound at the rock, but the rock simply takes it. Retaliation only fuels whatever keeps those types of people going. But when you do nothing, they in turn can only do nothing. Force is almost never needed, sometimes you only need to be gentle.

And that knowledge, that still rang true to this day, made Ryou smile a kind of secret hidden smile to himself.

Everyone always underestimated Ryou.

He didn't mind though.

(It just made his winnings all the more satisfying.)

* * *

A/N **HEY GUYS I WROTE A STORY. A _CHAPTERED_ STORY.**

Yeah, it's called "Fireproof" and it's vaguely based on chapter 25. You can find it by clicking on my profile. So it's an AU filled with demonic magic, Ryou and Bakura, and many other character who have yet to appear in this story (Like Yami no Malik, who shall be called Marik). So you it would be awesome if you gave it a try because updates will not be as frequent here while I'm working on it. I hoped you enjoyed this chapter, regardless though! Review!


	30. Puzzle Pieces

* * *

_A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.__ ~ Oscar Wilde_

* * *

"No. I don't think it matters, at least, not in the long run," he says the words sincerely but cautiously. He is being careful. Maybe for fear or loyalty (but there is always the question of which side he is playing for and the answers to that only lead to more reasons for being careful, so maybe that question too does not matter in the long run...) or maybe even because that is his way.

He has always been careful. He has to be. He, this ordinary high school student, this little boy, is dangerous.

(So dangerous.)

His - (he wants to say friend and he is sure the boy across from him would have no objections to this but perhaps he just answered his own question. This boy throws around the word freely, so it has become meaningless.) - _classmate_ knows this too. Maybe not consciously, but his classmate does know that he is dangerous. And that's why he curls back a bit once the words he had spoken set in.

"You really mean that, Bakura-kun?"

"Yes," he says, but now is not sure.

"How?" his classmates stares, wide eyed, naive, innocent. He assumes his eyes once looked like that too.

"It's simple, really," he lies, "There is good in everyone. Everyone deserves a second chance. Even him."

Him. His other. His darkness, his yami. Maybe he believes what he just said, maybe he doesn't. It really didn't matter in the long run. After all, for better or for worse, they are each one half of the same whole.

(He has taught himself to accept this by now, just so he could stop lying to himself.)

They compliment each other, in an odd way. His other sees in the broad scheme of things, while he can only see pieces. He sees them perfectly, each detail of each piece. He knows how they fit and what purpose they serve (host or friend) but he can never see the completed product. His other can though, his other swears he will see his plans come to fruition, and plots and plots moving each piece but not knowing each piece.

Together, (he is sorry to know this, because his classmate is so kind and he regrets that they are now enemies, but he and his other are one.)

Together, they could solve the puzzle.

"Wouldn't you agree, Yuugi-kun?"

* * *

A/N So I was feeling really angsty (mostly because of how sucky last chapter of Fireproof was) and I whipped this up. Hope you all enjoy it! Review!

* * *


	31. Always

A/N - Takes place about six years after the series end.

_A friend is someone who is there for you when he'd rather be anywhere else. ~ Len Wein_

Ryou never has a Saturday to himself.

-0-

He spends the morning and afternoon with Yuugi.

Yuugi always calls the night before and asks Ryou if he would like to come over for brunch the next morning (even if their meetings are so routine they have practically become tradition, Yuugi always calls) and Ryou responds, as always, that he'd be delighted and will be there around ten thirty.

Ryou thinks what he tells Yuugi every Friday night is the truth, or has at least become the truth over time. He does enjoy Yuugi's company, at times. Yuugi is like the sun. A bright, radiant light that shines on everyone indiscriminately, with or without their approval. And that is good because Ryou is constant rain.

(But perhaps it is bad for the same reason.)

Regardless, it's nice change of pace not to have to cook so every Saturday without fail Ryou shows up on Yuugi's doorstep.

He'll knock twice and by the time Ryou has counted to ten Yuugi opens the door. Ryou's sure that doesn't mean anything other than how ritual everything has become; a habit with so much power that it could not be broken. Ryou finds that…comforting.

Yuugi smiles, not as wide as he use to and some days it doesn't even reach his eyes (but it's more than Ryou has ever been capable off, so there is no room for judgment), and ushers Ryou in.

The Game Shop looks exactly the same even though Sugoroku has passed away. Yuugi takes good care of it. They walk to the kitchen and the pungent smell of eggs mixed with the plastic smell of the shop. It somehow always manages to make Ryou lose his appetite.

(He'll clean his plate though, always.)

The next part is probably the only thing that varies with each of Ryou's visits. Some days they will chat about small things; Yuugi will ask how Ryou's job at the museum is going and Ryou will in turn question about the Game Shops profits. Other days they will talk about bigger things; Ryou will ask if Yuugi has received anything new from Anzu in New York and Yuugi will in turn question about how Ishizu is settling in to her job at the museum. But most days they just sit in silence, enjoying each other's company.

(Ryou taking in a sunlight that had long ago been stolen from him and Yuugi watching the rain.)

Ryou always finishes eating first and then take his plate to the sink to wash it off. Yuugi protests but Ryou always insists and that's the end of that. Whatever they have is far too fragile to push.

They play Duel Monsters next. They don't duel. There are no duel disks or holograms, or people's lives at stake. It's just them setting on a table playing a card game where the only meaning of sending something to graveyard is putting that card to the pile on the side.

It's refreshing, and sometimes even fun. Yuugi always wins though. But Ryou is getting better. He is beginning to pick up on the subtle hits Yuugi gives away whenever he draws those certain cards. Looks, lingering and completive that do not suit Yuugi's bright violet eyes at all, always follow. Ryou could ask what Yuugi is thinking but then he'd have to know. (And Ryou is sure he'd never be able to understand anyway…)

So he gives Yuugi a minute and pretends that it didn't happen, but does change his strategy accordingly. Yuugi doesn't notice. After Yuugi wins and they've cleaned up, Ryou tells Yuugi that the breakfast was excellent and he had a very nice time. Yuugi smiles and tells Ryou the same. It's a polite exchange, but it makes Ryou feel like he has a friend, even if he doesn't deserve it. He turns to go and his pace does not falter until Yuugi calls out behind him:

"I hope you have a good day, Bakura-kun."

-0-

Ryou spends his evenings with Malik.

Malik never calls, he simply shows up. Ryou will be reading or cleaning when he hears a loud, banging knock at the door. Malik never stops knocking until Ryou opens it. The lilac eyed boy still has his helmet on his head and gives Ryou a look of disdain (which Ryou always responds with a quiet hello and a restrained glare). Then Malik commands, not asks but essentially orders Ryou that they are going to go out for drinks so hurry up because the motorcycle is still running. Ryou always sighs, grabs his jacket and follows Malik out the door.

He tells himself that he only goes for Ishizu, because she is such a pleasant co-worker. This way he can keep an eye on Malik and make sure he doesn't get to drunk and that he gets home safely. Ryou is sure that is the truth, because he can't stand Malik.

At all.

Malik is loud and crude and completely selfish; everything Ryou is not and therefore despises. Perhaps if there wasn't so much history between them, Ryou could have just taken Malik in stride. (But there is and Malik had used Ryou as if he was nothing more than a body, a vessel and not a soul, a person. And most damningly, Malik had sided with him, his darkness who is always right there –) Under his skin. Malik always finds away under the skin. So though he mentally promised Ishizu that he wouldn't let Malik get too drunk, Ryou always buys him a drink.

Malik never returns the favor. Ryou doesn't drink anyway, alcohol tastes like cough syrup and burns his tongue. He'll order a ginger ale though, just to pass the time. Malik always makes that same derogatory comment that was never clever to begin with and most certainly has not gotten funnier the more times he says it. Ryou thinks about telling him this, but doesn't and just lets Malik get away with it every time.

Within thirty minutes, Malik is already drunk. Thankfully, Malik isn't really an angry drunk, just a talkative one. Ryou sits through Malik ranting from something as trivial as a spill on the counter to yelling about how Ishizu and Rishid don't trust him and treat him like a child. Because you are a child, Ryou figures as he looks at Malik. He never responds to Malik's tantrums, Ryou simply looks at Malik.

The more Ryou looks, the deeper Ryou can see into Malik and it readily becomes apparent that Malik is still just a child. A very broken child. And deep within Ryou's heart compassion starts to stir (because really, he looks like that too, doesn't he?) but Malik will always ruin it.

No one ever brings up Ryou's other to his face. They have more decency and respect for that. Whether or not Malik mentions him in passing or in full, he says these things to Ryou as if they are common place, as if it is not a festering wound inside Ryou. It makes him hate Malik even more. (And it's hate and not at all jealousy at the fact that Malik might have known the spirit better than he did.)

Ryou is sure of this.

Next Ryou drags Malik to his motorcycle and starts it himself. There was no way he'd ever let Malik drive them home but that's not what he tells Malik. When Malik asks Ryou always says that Malik insisted on driving and that he almost got them both killed. For some reason, that makes Malik happy and for some reason, Ryou does that one small thing for him. (Maybe they really are friends, after all.)

When they reach Ryou's apartment, Ryou always has to practically break Malik's arms to get them off of his waist. Malik always squeezes to tight. It's a battle to get Malik up the stairs but eventually Ryou manages to get Malik onto the couch in his apartment, unharmed. Ryou then dials Ishizu's number and happily calms her down with the knowledge that Malik is here and that she can come pick him up.

Finally, after many awkward questions ("You're gay, aren't you Ryou?" "You already asked me that one,") asked by a half-passed and completely wasted Malik, Ishizu knocks at Ryou's door. Ryou is happy to get Malik out of his apartment and even allows himself a small smile as Malik falls off the couch. That is all quickly sucked away because, always, without fail, Malik looks up at Ryou and smirks:

"You look more and more like him every time I see you."

-0-

But Ryou always has Sundays alone (utterly, completely alone –there aren't even shadows), which is much, much worse.

A/N Lot's of angst, right? Anyway because of some RL complications, Fireproof's next chapter has been delayed till next Friday. Sorry!

Oh, and please leave a review!


	32. Brand New Day

* * *

_Once you choose hope, anything is possible. ~ Christopher Reeve_

_

* * *

_It's not until the Pharaoh crosses over to the afterlife and the cavern begins to crumble around him that Ryou realizes that this could be the end.

He runs, trying to escape the falling pillars. Over the stairs and into the midday sun, Ryou waits.

(Waits for the worst. Waits for the knowledge that the darkness is still there, residing somewhere in his soul. Because it has to be, it never leaves him and Ryou knows that but...he can't help but hope that the voice might be gone and he might be – )

Alone.

There is no cruel laughter ringing in his ears (saying I'll be here forever, yadonushi), there is no blinding light that comes when he loses control, there are no tassels of the millennium ring digging into his skin.

There is nothing and no one but him.

(Freedom! His mind shouts and his heart soars with gratitude towards the Pharaoh, Yuugi, everyone! _It's over_, he thinks and his heart returns from its flight to a calm, contented state.)

_It's finally over._

He steps forward into the Egyptian sun and laughs, loud and happy.

Genuine.

And once again he mutters thanks, and promises that he make the most of the brand new day.

* * *

A/N So I realized that I've updated Fireproof twice and haven't update here at all. I was rewatching the Millennium World Arc the other day and saw this quote in a magazine and this plot bunny was born. I hope for Ryou's sake he was happy about the outcome, just because the other options are too depressing.

Anyway, review!


	33. The Chronicles of Ryou Bakura

A/N So this monster of a chapter is the reason why the new chapter of Fireproof has been delayed until Friday. Sorry! Okay now for the warnings. Mentioned in passing polarshipping and vague hints of gemshipping.

* * *

_When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free. ~ Catherine Ponder_

_

* * *

  
_

-1-

When he wakes up, he is_ starving_**.**

Something, (like so many other things, so many…) he has grown accustomed to by now, the spirit seems to enjoy depriving his body of simple needs. He is also confused and practically tumbles down the staircase simply because he didn't know he was on one.

He staggers into Jounouchi's arms and is vaguely aware of how funny they (Yuugi and his friends) are looking at him – but the ache in his stomach is far too great for him to care.

And there is another ache, one that is not familiar and well unpleasant wasn't the right word it was simply foreign.

Ryou faints shortly thereafter.

-2-

When he wakes up (again), he is lying in a hospital bed. Which isn't at all unusual, so Ryou does not think much of it when he pulls himself into a sitting position.

"So you're finally awake."

That voice is not unusual either, but the hairs on the back of Ryou's neck stand straight up regardless.

But it is different too. Instead of it echoing through the chambers of his mind, it seems as if the voice is right beside him.

It is.

Out of the corner of his eye, Ryou sees a man with white hair that is unlike his own, the man's hair is almost grey…and he's sneering and saying something that Ryou can't understand because the world is crumbling around him and –

Then there was darkness.

(Ryou almost welcomed it.)

-3-

He knows what that ache was now.

"Even Malik?" He whispers in disbelief. Ryou pulls his knees close to his chest, covering up the place where the ring used to lay.

Yuugi nods and gives him a small smile.

He does not reciprocate it.

"And the…" Ryou wants to say "Voice" or even "the Thief" but it comes out "other me". He prays to all the gods he knows, especially the Egyptian ones, that he and the Voice are separate beings entirely. He doesn't want to be connected (chained) to that.

"He's outside, everyone – especially Atemu, thought it would probably be best if I explained it to you first," he says, eyes still shining bright.

(_How do you do that Yuugi_, he wonders, _how are you so bright?_)

"I'm glad it was you and not him," those words come out more venomous than intended, but it cannot be helped. Ryou feels poisoned.

"Yeah," Yuugi gives another nod and small smile; which, again, Ryou doesn't return. Instead he turns away ever so slightly and stares at the ground.

"I know this is a lot to take in, trust me I didn't believe it at first. Atemu didn't believe it at first! And I know it must be even harder for you…but I think they're here now for a reason and that we should make the best of it! I think, I think he can change if you help him. And we're friends, Ryou-kun, so you know I'll always be there for you when you need it!" Yuugi is expressive and naïve and stupid and his _friend _–

Friends.

All he ever wanted in life was someone to call him friend; to want him to be there for them.

It doesn't seem fair that this is the price he must pay for that. That voice, that voice that was – is, **is** cruel and cold and completely devoid of humanity now has flesh and blood. Ryou feels the world spinning again and he –

And he…

He…

He cringes for one. He trembles too, when all the information finally hits him, and thankfully Yuugi doesn't seem to notice that.

"Are you…are you alright, Ryou-kun?" Yuugi asks timidly and places a hand on his shoulder.

_Of course I'm alright, why wouldn't I be? I mean, he only ever stole my body and my friend's souls and tried to kill but everyone deserves forgiveness right? Even monsters right? Right, Yuugi-kun?_

"Ryou-kun!"

"What did you call me?" Ryou asks (it comes off as a hiss) as if he the awareness of what Yuugi had been calling him those whole times had just hit him like a ton of bricks.

Ryou. Yuugi called him Ryou.

No! It was dirty, it was _wrong _for Yuugi to call him that…only Amane, only Amane had ever…

Yuugi blushes and bashfully begins to scratch his head.

"Well," he starts, avoiding Ryou's intense gaze, "_He_ wants to be called Bakura so I thought I should start calling you Ryou – "

"He wants to be called Bakura."

Ryou does not look Yuugi in the eyes when says this (says, not asks).

It figures, he muses. From what Yuugi has told him the man is a thief.

(And what else was there to take from Ryou but his name?)

"Don't let him near me, Yuugi-kun."

"What? Ryou I really think you should –"

Ryou turns on his side and Yuugi shrinks back, realizing he has out stayed his welcome. The boy turns to leave, head bent and eyes down cast. He does not say goodbye to Yuugi, even though Ryou can feel the boy's stare burning through his clothes. Finally, the door closes shut and Ryou hears a lock clicking. He is safe now.

(Isn't he?)

He closes his eyes and hears laughter.

-4-

"You have to meet him sometime, Ryou," Yuugi cajoles as Ryou flees across the Egyptian sand trying to get to the tent before the Thief.

"No, I don't." _He is not my friend, Yuugi. He is not the other half of my soul and I am not his reincarnation and I am mostly certainly not his hikari. The only thing I ever was to him was a host._

"Ryou," Yuugi takes his hand and squeezes it tight. "This is hurting you more than it is him. Just meet him, just once."

Ryou looks into Yuugi's eyes and sees only the best of intentions, even if Yuugi is going about them all the wrong way. But Yuugi cares about him, something no one has done in such a long time and Ryou feels he owes him.

"Just once."

-5-

"So you finally got the courage to meet me face to face."

The Thief is mocking Ryou, and he sounds exactly like the Voice. Ryou's not sure what he was expecting the Thief to sound like, but somehow that disappoints him.

(Somehow it hurts him.)

"I am not afraid of you," Ryou says, but they both know he's lying. It was just something that needed to be said.

The Thief chuckles darkly and something gleams in his grey eyes. The scar on his face looks sinister.

"I hate you." The words have no convention, but Ryou is sure that he means them. After all he has done, how could Ryou not?

The Thief just lets out a quieter laugh and turns to follow the Ishtars into the tombs.

Ryou hopes that they find out how the Thief and the Pharaoh and Malik's darkness all came to be. He hopes, despite what Yuugi hopes, that it is only temporary and whatever those three are fades away.

(And he hopes that he is shaking out of anger and not fear.)

-6-

The Thief, as Ryou has made his mind up to call him (he will not call him Bakura, because that's was his name and his mother's and his sister – and the Thief does not deserve it) is rather childish.

Now that Ryou has overcome having to meet the Thief, he simply watches him. Somewhere in the back of his mind Ryou hopes that the Thief feels him watching, feels him judging like Ryou felt all those times he had the ring on.

Ryou watches him interact with the Pharaoh. From what Yuugi had told him he expected their hatred for each other to move the Pyramids with its force but in reality it was all rather petty and juvenile. Name calling was very elementary school after all.

Ryou watches him interact with Malik. This relationship too is rather childish. They bicker a lot and the Thief calls him brat on more than one occasions. That makes Ryou like Malik a little bit more, to think that the Thief can't stand him. Sometimes Ryou goes to talk to Malik, just to irk him. (That too is petty, but Ryou is watching the Thief and not himself.) Malik and he are more alike than he thought, even though Malik had been inside of his mind during Battle City. Ryou thinks maybe Malik hates his darkness more than Ryou hates the Thief.

Ryou watches him interact with himself, too. At times he and the Thief's eyes meet and a shiver runs down Ryou's spine. Before he has time to collect himself, the Thief smirks. Or when the Thief had draped a golden chain around his neck in the middle of the night and whispered, "Payment."

Ryou shivers again.

He decides to ignore this.

(And every emotion other than hate he decides to ignore too.)

-7-

The Ishtars still have not found anything.

"We will keep looking for answers for you Pharaoh," Ishizu promises at the airport. After all, he, Yuugi, Jounouchi, Honda, and Anzu are still very much in school and have missed enough days as is. They had to go home eventually.

And Atemu probably can't stand the thought of leaving Yuugi alone.

Ryou is tired and longs for the safety of his apartment, too, so he isn't entirely upset with the fact that there is no way to send the Thief back.

-8-

"He's not staying with me."

Those words are definite. Ryou, who had spent his life conforming for others, twisting and contorting himself to make things easier for everyone but himself, stands tall.

The airport continues around them as if the impossible had not just happened.

"B-bbbut," Yuugi stutters over his words as if he can't possible even fathom why Ryou wouldn't the Thief to stay with him. "His your other half, your darkness – "

_Why would I want my darkness around? I couldn't control him last time what makes you think I can control him now? His not Atemu, Yuugi._

"I won't have him live with me. He can stay here in Eygpt."

"Why? Look, I know this hard but, Ryou-kun, even Malik – "

Ryou in desperation cuts him off, "I'm not Malik."

But what he means to say is _I'm not you, Yuugi_.

He's not, after all.

(And he can't bring redemption to the Thief like Yuugi did with Atemu. His light is not bright enough for that.)

So Ryou turns to leave Yuugi behind, and all the ideals the boy still clings too.

(_Forgiveness, Redemption, Salvation, Hope…)_

Ryou is not bright enough for that.

-9-

Ryou opens the door to his apartment, he hasn't opened that door in at least two months, and the inside is still the same; unchanged.

He does not know rather to be relieved or horrified.

There is school work lying on his desk, untouched but now Ryou figures he will finally be able to get his grades back up. The small luggage full of the clothes he bought while in Egypt falls to the floor and that small noise echoes through the empty apartment.

Empty…

He is alone now.

But he's free now, too. From the Voice and the Thief…no, they are the same person, the same thing, the same –

It doesn't matter.

He's free.

(Isn't he? _Isn't he?_)

-10-

"He's at it again." That's the first thing Malik says when Ryou answers the phone. It's been two years since those fateful days in Egypt and Ryou knows he should be used to Malik's random phone calls.

But –

"What!?" Ryou asks, groggy and barely coherent. Apparently Malik forgot about the time difference between Egypt and Japan.

"Your yami. He's stealing again."

Ryou cringes at the use of that word.

"So? I don't see how that's my problem. Tell the authorities." Ryou snaps. Malik always seemed to bring out the snippiness of Ryou.

"Pfft. He's your responsibility, not mine."

"How is he my responsibility?"

"You're his hikari right? You don't see my yami killing all the people he wants."

"He's _killing_ people?" Ryou says with a hint of hysteria, "I thought you said he was just stealing!"

"Relax. It was just hypothetical situation. He's not killing anyone…yet."

It takes everything Ryou has not to hang up the phone right then and there.

"How do you know all this anyway?" Ryou borderline sneers.

"I talked to him yesterday." Malik says nonchalantly, as if it was the most common thing in the world.

Ryou's mouth drops open. He doesn't speak for a good three full minutes.

"You still there, Ryou?"

"I'm going to bed, Malik," Ryou says flatly, "Goodnight."

"Hey! That wasn't all I was gonna say, Ryou!"

"Goodnight!"

-11-

He's doing pretty well in college, all things considered.

His textbooks lay across the floor of his apartment, many things highlighted and scribbled notes in the margins. It's hard work, since so many things he should already know from High School he doesn't (because of the blackouts and the games of darkness…) so he always has to work harder than the average student.

But it's paying off. He has honors.

Ryou looks at his alarm clock.

It says 1:45.

Yeah, perhaps he could allow himself some sleep now, just a little rest and then he'll go right back to studying…

There's a knock at the door.

Ryou's eyes snap open and he races to answer. Did he order a pizza or something? He couldn't quite remember, but what else could it be?

He opens the door without hesitation and a man steps into the light of the porch lamp.

"Y-yyy-you," Ryou stutters out and steps backwards. "How, why? You."

The Thief smirks. "Did you miss me?"

Ryou tries to speak but finds he has no voice.

"Heh. You're still pathetic. Now are you going to be a good _host_ and let me in?"

_Host. _

He had heard that word, that leer, so many times in his head –

("But isn't that what you wanted, _host_, friends that would stay with you forever?" "Such a weak and pathetic _host_ I have.""You promised to help me collect all seven items, _host_. I hope you have forgotten." And again and again and again…)

– But to put a face to it, to see the way the Thief's lips twist into such a snarl, to have to watch it unfold…

Ryou loses it.

His fist connects with the thief right where the scar on his face lies.

The force of the blow sends the Thief stumbling into the wall.

The glower on his face evaporates and Ryou backs away, completely stunned. He must have put all his rage that had ever been inside into that punch because now he only feels empty and (he hates to admit, hates to prove the Thief right) afraid.

Afraid. Adrenaline pulses through Ryou's veins and every inch of him is screaming at him to run, but Ryou is frozen to the ground.

The Thief does not change his scrunched position against the wall when he tastes the blood on his cheek. Nor when he laughs or looks up with frenzied eyes.

The only thing Ryou sees after that is fists, sometimes his own.

-12-

When Ryou finally regains consciousness, the Thief is hovering over him.

He has a few bruises on his arm and his cheek is swollen, but Ryou can already feel that the damage done to him is much worse. Ryou still chalks it up as a victory to him.

"What are you doing here?" The words come out more tired than threatening.

The Thief regards him with disdain, but relaxes ever so slightly. "I came to see you."

Ryou stares up at him.

"Why?" The word comes out more hopeless than demanding.

(Maybe because Ryou is more hopeless than demanding.)

The Thief smirks and brushes Ryou's bangs out of his face.

Ryou again just stares while his mind tries to process the meaning of that action.

(It was almost gentle…)

"I don't belong to you!" Ryou sneers to try to hide the anxiety and panic in his voice.

The Thief merely laughs and turns to leave.

-13-

Though it's been two years, Ryou knows the Thief is still watching him.

Ryou wills himself to ignore it, like he ignores everything about the Thief's existence. But he feels this. Especially on the days he goes to visit Yuugi and Atemu.

It doesn't matter, he tells himself, there is nothing connecting him to the Thief.

At all.

They are different.

(Different like the other side of the same coin.)

-14-

"Hello? Fa-father?"

"Hello, Ryou. It's been awhile since we've talked."

"Uh- yeah. Why are you, why are you calling me?"

"I heard you graduate from college. With honors! I'm very proud of you but…"

"But?"

"Well, I think it's obvious you know how to take care of yourself, and you're not a child anymore. I just feel it's time – "

"You're kicking me out."

"I feel you should find your own place, yes."

"When?"

"The lease runs out in four months, so that should give you plenty of time to look for more affordable apartments and a job of course – "

_-click-_

-15-

Ryou cannot believe he is doing this.

(_Have I really sunk so low?_)

He sneaks through in alleyway into an "abandoned" warehouse, the very one the amateur pick-pocket had pointed out to Ryou. His heart is beating faster and he is already flustered even though for all he knows the pick-pocket had been lying to him…

(Then again, who other the he would go by the name King of Thieves?)

Ryou pushes the door to warehouse's back entrance and it opens with a creek. With each step he takes inside the more he regrets the last step more and more. Honestly, being homeless wouldn't be so bad. There would probably be shelters and maybe even eventually he would get called back for a job interview.

But who would ever hire him without an address?

Because of all his inner debating Ryou doesn't not even notice the Thief lurking in the shadows.

"Landlord," the Thief purrs and Ryou lets out a vaguely girlish squeak.

He smirks at that.

"What are you doing here?" But the way the Thief says it makes it seem to Ryou as if he already knows.

"I –," Ryou starts but again finds his voice has left him. The Thief smirk grows wider.

"I –," Ryou tries again and finally has to close his eyes to block out that smirk, "I was wondering if…"

"If what?"

"Look. I don't have a lot of money," Ryou pauses and looks away from the Thief's very amused eyes, sighing heavily.

He takes another breath. He's already here, might as well finish his proposition.

"I need a roommate." _I need a thief._

The Thief leans in closer, leering. "And?"

Ryou looks away, face flustered and twisted into a grimace.

"I need you."

The Thief just looks at him and smirks.

He is satisfied.

-16-

"I'm glad you two are living together. I think it will be good, for both of you!" Yuugi says very suddenly. Though Ryou had been sort of expecting it, seeing as how they had been dancing around the subject for the entire meal.

"Yeah." Ryou doesn't know what else to say but that and doesn't know if he is agreeing with Yuugi and or agreeing with what Yuugi actually said.

(The thought of any of it still aches, but not a bad ache just foreign…)

They go back to the conversation about Kaiba's latest invention, Jou and Mai's engagement and Anzu's latest show.

But Yuugi seems a lot happier now, and that makes Ryou smile a few times too.

-17-

"Ha! I knew you'd come around someday, Ryou."

"Shut up, Malik. Please."

"Oh don't feel bad, we are _all_ doomed to have to live with are darker halves!"

"That makes me feel so much better."

"I do always know just what to say. Besides, what did you think would happen once he showed up in Japan? Wait, don't answer that. Gotta go, Rishid's calling me."

"Bye."

-18-

The Thief is different than the Voice.

He realizes this now, after about a month of living with him. The Voice did not have a speck of humanity but the Thief, the Thief has his moments.

Ryou comes home late one night from pulling double shifts at the museum (he was trying very hard not to have to rely on the Thief's income any longer) and he sees the Thief passed out on the couch. Not a very pleasing sight but certainly not out of ordinary.

Ryou creeps passed him and towards the kitchen but before he can get there, he hears something.

"Please don't, don't hurt them – leave me alone! Please, no!"

His cries are muffled into the couch, but they're still cries.

Ryou stares – amazed. His heart swells with compassion, something it hasn't done in a long time and it takes Ryou a second to realize that yes, it is compassion and empathy and –

Forgiveness.

He knows very well he can't just give the Thief a hug (because deep down Ryou knows there is just a scared little boy who needs to be held) so the next morning Ryou he does the next best thing.

"Your village didn't deserve what happened to them. The Pharaoh was wrong. You're right."

-19-

"I got a job."

"Congratulations," says the Thief dryly and does not bother to look up at Ryou.

"It pays pretty well."

The Thief doesn't even dignify that one with a response.

"I mean I can support both of us with the money I make."

The Thief looks up, eyes narrowing into slits. "Is there something you are trying to say?"

Ryou looks down, eyes stuck to the floor. "You don't need to steal anymore."

"Heh. I like stealing."

Ryou closes his eyes and braces himself. "I don't want you stealing anymore."

"Too bad."

"You can't live here if you keep doing that." The words come out of Ryou's mouth slurred and rush but the Thief understands.

He glares.

Ryou sighs and turns away.

"I mean it."

(_Please just give it up. I don't want you to leave._)

-20-

"Just tell me you want to stay."

_Tell me you need me._

Something flashes in his other eyes and he recoils. Ryou assumes he is accessing the situation to see what will be in his best interests (he is a Thief after all, and thieves are by nature selfish creatures). That knowledge does not keep the few seconds that pass from feeling like lifetimes and it does not stop Ryou from seeing their entire lives with each tick of his kitchen clock.

Tick. (The creation of the millennium items; the screaming of Kul Elna.)

Tock. (The last kiss his mother ever gave him; the last hug of his sister.)

Tick. (The first moment the tassels of the millennium ring dug into his skin; the first moment in three thousand years he saw light.)

Tock. (They first time either of them had been truly free of the darkness.)

Tick/Tock/Tick/Tock (And all other moments past and present and future blur together like the ticking of the clock.)

"I want to stay."

The Thief does not look down, but he looks away and he says the words so softly, so gently, Ryou thought maybe he had actually been the one to say it.

But he hadn't said it.

His yami had.

The Thief sneers and says something that Ryou does not hear over the ringing in his ears. _He admitted it!_ His mind cheers, _He needs – wants to stay…_

That comprehension slowly warms his body like the first sip of hot cocoa and Ryou smiles.

A real smile.

(Genuine, pure and _bright._)

And for the first time in seven years Ryou feels truly hopeful.

And free.

* * *

A/N LOL OOC, Right? Well it kind of has a basis in canon. I was rewatching the Japanese Millennium World Arc and I noticed something. Well normally Thief King Bakura's voice is Yami no Bakura's voice but there was one scene where Rica Matsumoto used her Ryou voice for Thief King Bakura. Naturally I took this way to seriously and looked up the dubbed episode and found that Ted Lewis did the same thing. So yeah. This could happen. Maybe. -is ashamed-.

Review! Please?


	34. The Ocean

A/N Warnings: Eyesore first paragraph - but serves some kind of visual/metaphorical purpose. Hopefully. And references to the manga.

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_Everything flows and nothing abides, everything gives way and nothing stays fixed. ~ Heraclitus _

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Ryou had never been one from confrontation. He had always dreaded it as a child, made a conscious effort to avoid problems (_"No, no mother, really Amane can have it…I-ii was done playing with it anyway.")_. Naturally, because his father believed that having a child who would do as he's told no matter what was a good thing, Ryou never outgrew it. He lived life like sea foam on the ocean, drifting with each wave, never breaking from the current. That was all he knew. And when he receives the ring, it is still all he knows. He can never take it off, never wants to take it over and sometimes he'll wake up not knowing where he is but he accepts this. Ryou accepts, Ryou reacts but never does he disturb the established flow. He'll hear a voice, harsh but strangely soothing, like waves crashing against the shore. (_Give into me, yadonushi, give me control…_) And he listens, and he transfers from school to school, like the sea foam goes from wave to wave. Just to keep afloat, just to keep moving and then there is – Yuugi _("Monster World huh? That sounds like fun Bakura-kun!_) – who is a disruption, who sends ripples through Ryou's world, shakes it up so much that he can't fall back in sync with the waves and that voice is there again and that voice is hurting his friends – his friends! – (_You will not ruin this for me. I will have the puzzle!_)

**No!**

He breaks away from the flow. Starts a new current.

And he holds his head up high, his eyes burn with a sort of resigned fury; defiance in the face of certain failure.

**I won't let you hurt them.**

**

* * *

**A/N Just want to say thanks for the amazing response last chapter! Each review warmed my heart.

Review again, please!

(So. Fireproof readers should go to my profile ASAP, after they are done reviewing of course.)


	35. Chance Encounter

A/N Post-series. Again. Maybe like eight years after the last episode.

* * *

_(It's alright with me)/It's okay by me/It was a long time ago ~ Speeding Cars, Imogen Heap_

* * *

"No, no Elisa, those boxes go to first floor, not the second."

"Sorry Mr. Bakura!" said the young girl, Elisa. She turned around quickly and headed back to the first floor.

Ryou watched her go. It was odd, he mused, being back in England. After all the time that had passed, this was where he ended up. Of all places, he always thought that when he moved to Domino he would have stayed there forever…

He shook himself out of his daze and returned back to his work. There was an exhibit to set up after all; he wasn't being paid to daydream.

Egyptian artifacts lined the walls and lights dangled from the ceiling, their wires showing. There was still a lot to be done before the exhibit would be presentable.

Ryou sighed.

So much to do, so very much to do –

"Hey, hey! You!"

Ryou froze. Was that man speaking Japanese?

Bemused, Ryou looked over his shoulder and saw the speaker. He was a very tan man with blonde hair and bright purple eyes. A shiver ran down his spine, though he didn't know why. And when Ryou tried to think of why, his head simply became fuzzy and _dim_ like, like –

(Like being drowned in darkness.)

The man took a step forward.

"You're name is Bakura, Bakura Ryou right?"

"Yes." Ryou had to force the word out. His whole body had clamped up. Why was he having such a strong reaction? He couldn't ever recall meeting this man and there certainly wasn't anything to be afraid of, the man couldn't be any older than Ryou. He certainly didn't look intimidating.

"You don't remember me, do you?" He sounded almost bitter. Or sad. Ryou couldn't tell which.

"No… I'm sorry; I've always had a bad memory!" Ryou faked a laugh to go with the last bit he had hastily added on when he realized how bitter and rude the first word had come out as.

The boy moved even closer to Ryou.

Ryou, instinctively, took a step back. His eyes narrowed.

(Both reactions where almost…involuntary.)

"My name is Malik Ishtar," He said, and Ryou could sense the man's arrogance all of a sudden.

Malik Ishtar.

It was odd, that name sounded familiar and when he said it in his head, it wasn't in his voice instead it was in Yuugi's.

(Yuugi…)

"You were in Egypt with us?" He said this more to himself, but Malik nodded.

"Are you a friend of Yuugi's?" Ryou had to ask because he honestly couldn't remember. Those couple of years when he was sixteen, seventeen were cloaked in a black fog. Whenever he tried to think, there was always something that choked – suffocated him. He could never find anything in that darkness.

Malik blanched. "I guess."

"Have you talked with him lately?" Malik questioned, he was eager to divert the conversation to Ryou.

Ryou felt his body stiffen.

"_I'm happy he's gone, you know. So you can stop looking me like that. Like I'm about to break any second."_

"_I wasn't – ,"_

"_Don't _lie_ to me, Yuugi!"_

"_Bakura-kun?"_

"_I'm…I'm sorry, Yuugi-kun. I didn't mean to raise my voice."_

"…"

"…"

"_Bakura-kun, let me help you. Please. You're my friend. I don't want you hurting."_

"_I'm fine." _

"_Bakura-kun you don't have to do this by yourself! I'm here and I know what it's like."_

"_No you don't. You don't have any idea."_

"_What are you –,"_

"_I should go." _

Ryou willed himself to stop thinking about that. It was all so long ago. Years, almost a decade.

Meaningless.

It was all meaningless.

"No, actually I haven't."

"Oh, that's too bad." Ryou thought he heard a hint of sarcasm in that.

They stood there, wrapped in a silence that was particularly awkward. Why had Malik even wanted to talk to him? Ryou had only seen Malik briefly in Egypt. Had they even ever talked? And how did Malik know Yuugi so well again?

"Battle City! You were there weren't you? ... Oh."

_That's_ why Malik had recognized him.

(He'd spent plenty of time in Ryou's body.)

"Um…yeah." Malik's eyes suddenly found the floor very interesting.

Mechanically, Ryou's hand found the spot on his arm where he had been…hurt. The memories washed over him with the force of water breaking out of a dam. They crashed onto him and dragged him under to their darkest depths.

He remembered.

The deal that Malik and the, and the (_**just say it**_!) spirit of the millennium ring (Ryou had began to tremble, but he quickly clenched his fists to make himself stop) had made. Being thrown back into his bleeding body in the middle of duel, at _Malik's_ urging and the spirit of the millennium ring, he remembered the spirit of the millennium ring!

The trembling had already turned into shaking. Malik must have seen this because he cringed.

"Are you – are you alright?" Malik asked, seemingly genuinely concerned.

"Of course," He snapped, no longer caring about polite facades. This boy had invaded his mind on multiply occasions, what could Ryou hide from him that he didn't already know?

"Look." Malik closed his eyes and he shook, as if he was swallowing down a very big pill (or maybe his pride?).

"Would it mean anything if I told you I was sorry?" The words were both desperate and incredulous.

"I – what?" Ryou blinked, completely stunned. No one had ever, no one had ever apologized to him – not his father for abandoning him, not Yuugi for making decisions that took away apart of himself (even if it was the darkness) no one.

Malik rolled his eyes, but then a solemn expression overcame them.

"I'm sorry, Bakura Ryou."

Ryou's mouth dropped open.

They stared at each for a minute, and then Ryou did nothing. Malik was waiting for something, acceptances of his apologize probably, but all of Ryou's words had dried up.

So he said nothing.

(And Ryou curled back into himself.)

Something flashed through Malik's eyes.

"I get it," he said, with that same bitter pleading tone to them as he had everything else.

Malik walked away.

Ryou watched.

He remembered after all, Kul Elna and the hate the – the spirit of the millennium ring – had carried around. And he – Bakura Ryou (different, they were different) – he didn't want to be that. He couldn't let himself be that.

He wouldn't.

(Forgiveness, something the spirit never knew, but Ryou could at least try...)

"Wait!" Ryou called out, rather loudly.

Malik turned around a bewildered expression on his face.

"Yeah?"

Ryou felt all the courage he had drain from him. The words pushed at the roof of his mouth, but somehow his tongue would not heed them.

No.

His fears, his hates, his _guilt_ would not rule him.

Not anymore.

The past was the past. Everyone deserved a fresh start.

(_Even me, yes even me._)

He looked into Malik's confused, vulnerable lilac eyes with determined confident brown ones.

"Would you – would you like to come over for tea?"

* * *

A/N I would just like to see today is the six-month anniversary of this fic. I can't believe I've been writing this for six months, which may not seem a lot to you, but it seems like forever to me. At this rate in another six months I will have 70 chapters! -mind boggles-

Anyways, review!


	36. Dreams & Nightmares

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_I have had dreams and I have had nightmares, but I have conquered my nightmares because of my dreams. ~ Jonas Salk_

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_

It's a dream.

The darkness swirls around Ryou, tendrils of blackness lick at his heels. Same as always. There are two doors, one to the right of where he stands and the other the left. The darkness billows out from the right and Ryou's door glows rather dimly. Just as it did the night before because the dream (yes it's a _dream_, just a dream) is always the same. Though, to the spirit's credit, the monogamy and fixed outcome does nothing for his fear.

The shadows crawl up his body in sync with the frantic beating of his heart. Ryou takes in a deep breath trying to calm himself, because it is just a dream. This slows the darkness down, but does not stop it. After all Ryou is only ever capable of stalling, not stopping. (Or saving, sorry Yuugi, so sorry...)

"Yadonushi," the spirit leers and Ryou knows he is smirking, even though the spirit is not within sight, yet.

"Go away," he says, trying to say it loud and clear only to have it come out cracked and shaking. As it did yesterday.

"Why? This is what you wanted."

"What? No…no! I would never – why would I ever – ?" He's made a fatal mistake. He should know by now not to ask questions.

(Not when the spirit was so willing to answer.)

"Punishment, yadonushi you wanted punishment. And here I am."

Ryou's eyes widen and he can feel the spirit force his own memories onto him. Memories of his sister's bright green eyes, and how he promised to protect her. And failed.

The spirit laughs.

Ryou hates that laugh; hates it with more passion than he's ever felt for anything in his entire life. More than he'll ever feel for anything else after. (And this too he hates, because Ryou had never wanted to hate anyone – he had been forced.)

His heart is beating faster and the darkness flares up to his chest. Ryou breathes in. No, it's just a dream. He won't let it be a nightmare.

(Not yet.)

With that pledge, Ryou lets the darkness consume him.

* * *

Long drabble is almost too long to be a drabble. But whatever. Just want to say thanks to all the reviewers last chapter, you guys make my day.

Review! =)


	37. The Four Seasons

A/N Okay. Warnings: strong _hints _of tendershipping, vague heartshipping and angstshipping keep in mind most of this was intended as friendship. Oh and the seasons do go chronologically, but there is a bit of a timeskip for summer. Hopefully it's easier to follow. Dedicated to **Fiver**, as requested.

* * *

_What do you mean I don't love you?/I'm standing here, aren't I? ~ Tiny Little Fractures, Snow Patrol_

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_

-AUTUMN-

This was a very beautiful city, at this time of year.

Though, Ryou mused, all cities must look beautiful during fall. When the trees shed their leaves is a very beautiful sight, a very beautiful time of year. Bright yellows, oranges and reds all lit up the trees branches. Ryou would have to go to the park soon, it must be gorgeous there. Plus, there is a crisp wind in the air. Not cold enough to be uncomfortable, but just the right temperature to wear a jacket and be perfect. The cool breeze was always refreshing to Ryou.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to have to live by himself here.

(But that one vaguely hopeful thought is drowned out by a million doubts so Ryou's shoulders still remain slumped.)

He takes his time walking to his apartment, taking in the pretty trees the complex had planted and looking at the cars. Ryou was trying to make everything familiar. He walked up the stairs and went to the door marked 204. The door took some fiddling but he eventually gets it opened.

His apartment is big, and he knows that he should be thankful his father can afford it, but it just makes the apartment feel emptier.

(And makes him feel more alone.)

The living room is very wide and open, with the door the balcony on the right wall. There is a hallway leading to his bedroom and bathroom he presumed, and the kitchen was to the left off the door. Ryou walks to the refrigerator and that's when he sees it.

A small brown box, marked with a return address of Egypt.

(_Father…_)

Hesitantly, Ryou begins to open up the box. He tries to calm himself, because the chances of it being a birthday present were so slim even if you don't consider the fact his father hadn't sent him a present in two years…

Inside the box was another box, this one wrapped in bright paper (like the colors of the leaves outside) and a letter.

Ryou opens his birthday present (a small grin overtakes his face at that word) first.

It…well he didn't really know what it was. At least, he didn't know what to call it. It was beautiful, in an odd sort of way. Haunting, almost. Eerie too, but it also had a calming factor. Ryou kind of wanted to wear it. Was that what he was supposed to do with it? There is a small loop where string could go…

Ryou looked through the box and found a piece of rope. So he _was_ supposed to wear it.

Next he opens the letter.

_Dear Ryou,_

_I wanted to get something special for your birthday, something one of a kind. I found this at the local bazaar. I don't know if it is real gold and I know for certain it isn't an artifact because the merchant said it had something to do with that Duel Monsters game you like so much. But it certainly is interesting right? Oh and the merchant who sold it to me called it the millennium ring._

_Happy Birthday!_

_I love you son._

_~ Your father._

Ryou puts the millennium ring on and can almost see his father smiling at him and mouthing those four words:

"I love you, son."

It seems like it was five autumns ago that his father had said that to him. But now Ryou has this ring to prove his father does at least care for him, if only a little…

(So he's never going to it off, he'll wear everyday and through all of the autumns it takes for his father to say I love you again.)

-WINTER-

Domino has frozen over.

Everything is encrusted with ice and a coating of snow lies over it. In the morning it had sparkled in the sun, but now the afternoon has made the sky grey so the snow too looks grey. As Ryou hurries across the park (it was a shortcut he took from school to his apartment, because the faster he got home, the better) the snow crunches beneath his feet. The snow was definitely packing snow. That's what Amane would say, she did always love to make snowballs…

Ryou tries to summon the memory (memories of Amane are all that keeps him going, now) but all he sees is darkness. What could possibly be blocking his memory?

The millennium ring digs deeper into Ryou chest as if to answer him.

Ryou's hands begin to shake and his shoulders slump. His is almost brought to his knees but the sheer force of his hatred for the spirit of the ring.

(_Not even that, you can't even let me have that?_)

His knees give out and he falls to the ground. The snow really doesn't do much to soften the impact.

Ryou closes his eyes, trying to hold back tears.

No, no. He was so sick of being weak and fragile, he had to be strong. Strong because the spirit was strong and he had to protect Yuugi and Yuugi's friends (they had been so kind to him and didn't deserve what Ryou had brought upon them…) – he had to defeat the spirit.

But his legs have no strength and Ryou cannot get up.

(A few tears slip out, but Ryou pretends they don't.)

Something caresses his skin and Ryou clutches his arm in fright. There was nothing there (though his arms felt slightly wet). Ryou looks up towards the sky and sees white dots falling from the grey clouds.

It's snowing.

Snow always made Amane happy, so it had made Ryou happy too. (_And no, you can't take her from me, spirit, no matter what!_)

But now, it's just cold and wet when it reaches his skin. It means nothing.

Ryou rises from the ground and hurries home.

Maybe he makes it to his apartment.

Maybe he doesn't.

Ryou can't tell because with each step he takes the house to right off him dissolves and falls into a black abyss that has appeared on all sides of him. The only thing left from the real world was the pavement he had been walking on and now it only leads one way. Ryou turned his head to see the blocks he had walk dissolve too.

It's the spirit's doing. Ryou already knows.

Only the spirit could create something so dark.

Ryou follows the path set out for him because he can do nothing else.

A few steps, that was all it took before Ryou saw a small platform come into view. The spirit was there, arms crossed, waiting for him.

(And Ryou's heartbeat quickens with something that could only be dread.)

The pavement ends and Ryou climbs onto the platform. Finally the last little bit of the real world melts away and it is only he and the spirit of the millennium ring standing there in the darkness of their souls.

"Yadonushi," The spirit smirks.

"You," Ryou glares.

They don't ever call each other by real names, because they both shared a similar thinking pattern.

Ryou would not give the spirit a name because the spirit was nothing more than a shadow – darkness already had one name and real names were reserved for people.

The spirit would not address Ryou by his name because all Ryou was to him was a host – yadonushi would suffice and besides names were meant for people, not tools.

"You act so cold," the spirit says and starts to circle Ryou, "Even after all I've done for you."

Ryou's fists clench. Memories come spilling towards him (but only painful memories, the only type of memories the spirit allows Ryou to have) of laughing, of playing games with his friends, of how glassy their eyes became after the game ends, just like the glassy eyes of his figurines.

"I never wanted any of that! Any of the things you've brought to me!" Ryou shouts, (_and you're only saying that to hurt me, you only did those things to hurt me, you don't care about my wishes, it's just sadism –_)

The spirit scoffs, but something in his eyes burn.

(Maybe he really does just like watching Ryou squirm.)

"You did want me though. Remember; remember your promises, yadonushi? Do you think I will just let you forget them so easily?"

Ryou takes a step back.

"I don't know what you're talking about," his voice is shaking and his clenched fists begin to tremble.

The spirit's smirk grows revealing canine teeth. Ryou shivers.

"You promised to help me collect all seven of the millennium items and that is a promise you will _keep_." The spirit's voice is low and powerful and Ryou feels his defiance weakening.

(He is scared.)

"No, I didn't…I would never…" Ryou's words break and dissolve much like the pavement had earlier.

"You did. The day put on the millennium ring."

Ryou has no words, he has no voice.

(Had he wanted this? Did he deserve this? To help the spirit of the ring to get the millennium items so he could…destroy the world…avenge Kul Elna?)

"You will help me."

"No!" Ryou shouts with such force the platform they stand on vibrates.

Ryou faces the spirit head on; shoulders back, chest out, and eyes locked with the mirror reflection of his own brown eyes.

He is no longer afraid.

(_I think I do want to help you…just not like that…if you'd let me help you differently, maybe…maybe…_)

The spirit does not flinch or step back but his mouth does press into a fine line. He takes a step forward, grabs Ryou by his collar (he does not shriek or call out or fight, Ryou simply holds the spirit's intense gaze) and pulls Ryou close, so close their faces are almost touching –

And –

(Ryou's heart is beating faster and faster; out of panic, out of the instinct – though all of his instincts are going off right now and he can tell what a frantic heartbeat _really_ means anymore – )

And –

And that is all.

The spirit lets Ryou go, and Ryou is sinking into the black space, falling and tumbling like the snowflakes in the sky had.

Ryou thinks about reaching out for the spirit, to try to hold onto his hand (if only to see what it would feel like) but his common sense stops him.

The spirit is cold-blood, ruthless – a murder.

Ryou shouldn't care.

( – Even though all the spirit allows him is bad memories, so he hears the village being burned sometimes, hears the cries in his sleep like the spirit must have heard for three thousand years – )

He doesn't.

So he lets himself fall through the darkness.

(And besides, the spirit's touch would probably just hurt him – like the stung you feel when you first touch ice.)

-SPRING-

It's spring.

By now little green buds have appeared on the trees, the snow having melted away a long time ago. The lawns would be dotted with flowers of every color, birds would be chirping and the sun would finally start to shine again. (Probably, since Ryou really hasn't been out of his apartment to see.) But it was a great time of year. Spring meant rebirth, renewal, hope.

So why did Ryou still feel as dead and cold as he did in winter?

(Worse even, but if he thought about that it meant…meant things that made no sense.)

There's a knock at the door.

Ryou's eyes narrow. He doesn't want to see anyone; he just wants to be alone (because now he was truly alone what with the millennium items being gone).

Another knock. Whoever they were they were persistent.

Ryou turns his attention back to the mirror. It didn't matter who the person at the door was. They would have to give up eventually.

Yet another knock, louder than all the ones before it.

Ryou, snarling under his breath opens the door.

Yuugi stands there innocently and smiles up at him.

All of the anger Ryou had felt prior to that freezes into a lump in his throat. He pursues his lips.

"Hello, Yuugi-kun."

"Hi, Bakura-kun!"

Yuugi reaches out to grab his hand. Ryou recoils.

"What do you want?" Ryou speaks the words monotonously, no emotion either way. Cold indifference.

Yuugi appears to be taken back by this, maybe even hurt and most definitely surprised. Ryou was never rude.

"I…I wanted to invite you to go look at the cherry blossoms. They're blooming in the park!" Yuugi's voice is ridiculously hopeful, it makes Ryou feel so sick.

(He wants to be like that, to be able to smile again.)

"Thank you, but no," Ryou says curtly, "I'm sure you Anzu, Jou and Honda will be fine without me."

Ryou closes the door, but Yuugi wedges his foot to stop it from closing completely.

"I didn't invite them," he says, the hopefulness now slightly dimmed.

"You...you didn't? Why not!" Ryou says it almost angrily, just because he is so confused.

(And the only way to understand was to look at everything in his life piece by piece, and Ryou didn't want to do that. He couldn't. It was so much easier to just hate, instead of forgiveness…)

"I thought it would be just better you and me," Yuugi says and diverts his gaze to ground; "I remembered you told me how much you loved them once."

"You remembered that?" The façade he had put up was starting to thaw like snow in spring and was revealing what really lied beneath his indifference.

Pain.

Yuugi gives a small smile and nods vigorously.

"Yeah, I remember everything you tell me. Like your birthday is September 2nd or that you're favorite food is creampuffs…" he trails off.

Ryou stares at Yuugi, both amazed and horrified.

"So," Yuugi looks up from the ground, straight into Ryou's eyes (which are starting to soften), "Will you come with me? You haven't talked to me in a long time and I'm worried about you."

Ryou's eyes harden once again.

"There's no need to be worried about me. I'm fine," he sneers.

(_You don't even care about me, do you? You just think I'm a threat? That I'll turn out like him? _He_ wasn't even…_he_ never…_I'm_…_)

"No you're not," Yuugi says and suddenly he looks very old and tired. Not at all like the way Yuugi should look.

Before Ryou can retort or defend himself Yuugi is smiling again. A soft, sad smile.

"I miss you," he says, "A lot."

"I miss you too," Ryou says, the words just spurting out of his mouth. But he means them, even if he doesn't want too.

"Come with me, Bakura-kun," he pauses, and for the first time, Yuugi's smile falters.

"Please," Yuugi whispers.

"_Why?_" Ryou looks up at Yuugi (up, because he has been slouching this whole time, the only time he ever stood up straight was when the spirit of the ring –) and his eyes are red. He's desperate for answers, for consolations, for apologizes, for a reason why this happened to him…

Yuugi looks down, and smiles sadly. He knows.

(And better yet he _understands_.)

"Because we're friends. Aren't we Bakura-kun?"

Ryou lets everything wash over him (-**everything**-) and stares at his feet.

"Yeah."

He raises his head looks at Yuugi and smiles, no matter how broken it is and even if it is just barely reaching his eyes, it's like the way flowers slowly break through the frozen ground. Ryou just needs time and he'll bloom.

"We are. No matter what."

Yuugi's eye lit up like a carnival and he pulls Ryou into a hug. It takes Ryou a few seconds to remember what he is suppose to do (it had been such a long time since he had been hugged…) but he does remember. And he hugs Yuugi back.

Then Yuugi smiles big and bright enough to unfreeze both of them.

-SUMMER-

It's nice a summer day.

The air is thick, and while it's only in the seventies the humidity makes it feel much, much hotter. Ryou doesn't mind though, it's better than the rain they've had for the last few days. At least now the sun is shining. The sun is the one reason why Ryou is at the park at all today. He usually prefers to study within the comfort of his apartment, but the sunshine was too good to pass up.

It's just so…_nice_.

(That word is still foreign on his lips, even though there are more occasions for him to use it than ever before.)

Ryou diverts his attention back to the textbook in front of him and reaches for his highlighter. The park is so quiet today, which is surprising but nevertheless Ryou enjoys it very much. Peaceful, that's word. It was very peaceful.

"Hey Ryou! Ryou!" A loud voice calls out from behind him, ruining his perfect silence. There were only two people in the entire world who ever called Ryou by his first name, and only one of them was going to college in Domino.

"Hi Malik," Ryou says and his voice already sounds exhausted. He doesn't even bother to look up.

"Put away your cruddy books, we are going on a road trip!" Malik declares.

Ryou ignores him. He has become so use to Malik's seemingly random demands by now; they no longer rile him up.

"Did you hear what I said?" Malik asks, sneering a bit.

"Yes, I did," Ryou says dryly, flipping the page of his textbook.

"Then why are you still reading?"

"I have an exam in two days, Malik. I need to study." Ryou explains, almost patronizingly.

Malik rolls his eyes.

"You want to pass an exam by studying that tripe?" Malik eyes Ryou's textbook with disdain, "Trust me, Ryou. They have no clue what they're talking about it."

"I know." Ryou says, because he does. He knew when he first decided to major in Egyptology that he would know more than any of the professors or textbooks.

"So why do bother reading it?" Malik says slightly accusatory and sits himself right next to Ryou.

(Ryou doesn't mind Malik being so close.)

"Because I have an exam based around this textbook, Malik. However inaccurate it may be."

"So you mean to tell me that you are going to waste a perfect day like this reading and memorizing information that isn't even accurate?" Malik scorns.

"Yes."

Malik lets out an aggravated snort.

Amazingly, the actually sit in silence for a few minutes. Ryou even manages to read something about hieroglyphs before –

"Ryou I'm bored." Malik whines, sounding like such a bratty child.

It never fails with him. Malik was always craving for adventure, to just get up and get going. He had changed his major about a dozen times, because he got bored with his studies. Ryou knew it had something to do with living in the catacombs all those years. Even though his family's mission had been accomplished, maybe somewhere in the back of Malik's mind he feared that he would have to return and wanted to do all he could now. That's why Ryou lets himself be dragged along for many a stupid stunt. They were friends, after all.

(And Ryou wanted nothing more than to see Malik happy.)

But – Ryou was not so lucky as to have a big sister to pay his way through college like Malik did and he was only making by his scholarships that he was making ends meet, so his studies were very important.

"Maybe you could do something with someone else," Ryou suggests and turns the page of his textbook.

"I don't want to go with anyone but you Ryou," Malik says and means it. Truly means it. Ryou can tell by the way he's usually arrogance is absent, and there is no bitter connotation. The words are spoken bluntly and truthfully. Ryou's not surprised. They are, after all, both damaged goods. It was only natural they'd find solace in each other.

(Maybe that's why he lets Malik call him Ryou.)

That knowledge makes Ryou smile; sweet and serene.

Malik scoffs.

"Well don't just sit there, _looking_ at me. Let's do something!"

"Like what, Malik?" Ryou asks. Obviously Malik was not going to let Ryou study. And it wasn't like his exam was tomorrow so if Malik had something reasonable in mind that only took a few hours, Ryou would consider it.

"Skiing. Let's go skiing."

Ryou blinks.

"Malik, it's summer."

"Well, then let's go to Colorado or something," Malik grumbles.

"It's summer in America, too."

"Well there has to be somewhere in the world where it's snowing!"

Ryou cocks an eyebrow and then bursts out laughing. The sound is full and unburden and joyful.

(_I'm so glad I'm here with you._)

Malik glares at him, mouthing hanging open. That only makes Ryou laugh harder.

The blonde glare turns into a stare and to Ryou it looks like he is considering something.

"…I am being kind of ridiculous aren't I?" Malik asks after a moment.

"Yeah," Ryou says the ghost of his laughing fit still there, "Yeah, you are."

Malik lets out a loud groan and then buries his face into his hands.

"I can't help it," Malik moans through his fingers, "It's just so boring here."

"You could have stayed in Egypt," Ryou reminds him and gently pats him on the shoulder.

"I'm so sick of Egypt," Malik hisses and jerks himself out of Ryou's contact.

Ryou can already feel the guilt crawling up to his throat and making him say things that he really shouldn't say (but some part of him feels he needs to nonetheless).

"Hey," Ryou reaches out again to touch Malik, "There must be something here you want to do?"

Malik eyes Ryou askance and Ryou gives his best "I'm completely innocent and really, _really_ agreeable" smile.

"Well…," Malik looks away, but not before Ryou catches the devilish glint in his eyes, "I've always wanted to climb Mt. Fuji."

Ryou's mouth drops open.

"Please tell me you're kidding."

"Don't be such a baby, Ryou. It's not that hard at all! I was doing some research and really the only major difficulty is the thin air!"

"Thin…air…?" Ryou chokes out. But the thought of him climbing a mountain isn't as bizarre as the idea of Malik doing research. It must really be important to him.

Ryou's heart sinks and he could feel the color draining from his face. Malik notices that too.

"Come on Ryou it will be fun and so entertaining!" Malik urges.

"Is that all I am to you, Malik? Entertainment?" The words were supposed to be sarcastic, but they come out half-way true.

"Of course," Malik scoffs, as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

Ryou is taken aback and he can feel his body tense (the way it does whenever some hurts him).

Malik looks at him up and down.

"That's why we're _friends_, Ryou," He emphasizes that f word because like Ryou knows how much Malik needs **freedom**, Malik knows how much Ryou needs **friends**.

Ryou gazes deep into Malik's lilac eyes. There is no hidden agenda in them.

And that's enough for Ryou.

(He doesn't want to overanalyze right now, because what they have is _nice. _And that's all he wants, he doesn't need something epic. )

"But really, climbing Mt. Fuji?" Ryou says and his voice shakes just a bit.

Malik smirks.

(Everything is alright between them.)

Before Malik even says it, Ryou know what's coming.

"You have to live your life, Ryou! Take a few risks, for once," Malik sneers the last two words out. Just like he always does.

"There's a difference between taking risks and stupidity."

"If you are too scared to do it for yourself, at least do it for me," Malik demands, rudely and obnoxiously. His stare pierces through Ryou and the white-haired boy knows his been defeated.

Ryou sighs, yet somehow he can't stop himself from smiling.

"It'll be fine. I won't let anything happen to you."

Malik (with a cocky smirk) offers Ryou his hand.

Ryou takes it.

"Fine, Malik. I'll do it."

(_I'll do it for you._)

A warm summer breeze ruffles through Ryou's hair and he knows everything will turn out fine.

* * *

A/N Guys this story kicked my butt so hard. SO HARD. I had so many ideas for this quote I just squeezed them all into one story. I thought it would turn out awesome...but. Well I apologize but at least you can't say I didn't try. I tried so hard. It's kind of okay.

Review for me? Please?


	38. Whispers

A/N Manga based. References of Monster World RPG and the fact that in the manga Ryou couldn't hear Yami no Bakura until he touched the puzzle.

* * *

_A neurosis is a secret that you don't know you are keeping. ~ Kenneth Tynan_

_

* * *

  
_

Ryou hears things sometimes. Whispers.

He'd never admitted that to anyone, not even himself. Even now the thought is no more than grazing the conscious part of his mind. It's not even a thought, it is that unformed. It's more of a _feeling_.

He feels it (especially at night) like a blanket of darkness that surrounds him, cloaks him (because no one seems to notice him anymore, no one seems to care and those that get too close…the comas –) and suffocates him. Sometimes he can't breathe.

(Sometimes he hears laughter.)

Ryou would just ignore those feelings, suppress his intuition – but it's changed him. Like the way he wakes up not knowing where he is or the way his ears perk up at not just his own name anymore, but also at the word "host"…

He shakes his head.

No, there is no need to think about this now. He needs rest. (He needs to just close his eyes and not be afraid of the darkness beneath them.) Ryou forces his eyes shut and wills himself to sleep.

After all, tomorrow he starts his first day at Domino High.

* * *

A/N ASFKJLDAFJL! OMG YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING. 200+ REVIEWS. -is speechless- -mouths 'please leave a review'-

But honestly, thank you so much for all those reviews. It's unbelievable.


	39. The Lesser of Two Evils

A/N References to the manga. (Monster World and how Ryou first "met" the spirit of the ring). Takes place during Battle City, episodes 68 - 96 to be exact. Koe = Voice, Yadonushi = Host, Landlord etc. The usual random Japanese.

* * *

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend/somewhere along the bitterness/and would I have stayed up with you all night ~ How to Save a Life, The Fray._

* * *

He looks at the reflection of himself.

That sentence sounds strange to Ryou's ears, because for once there is no hidden meaning to it, no himself but not himself. It is just him. Calm white hair. Pale skin. Scared eyes.

_Me._

The glass is smooth underneath his hand as he traces his reflection (savoring it because he has come to realize he will never be able to look into a mirror and see only himself ever again) and it is firm and cold ("I granted your wish, yadonushi. Now you'll never be alone again." A laugh comes next and, even if it's just a memory, chills go up Ryou's spine.) but strangely soothing underneath his scratched and bloody hands.

It looks fragile, Ryou muses, this glass wall that cuts through my soul room.

But it's not.

His bruised and bloody hands can attest for that.

Ryou remembers the first time he saw the glass. It was after _they_ (he thinks that loudly, as loud as he can and knows the darkness can hear him) defeated the Voice, the darkness in the Monster World RPG. Again, the Voice had stolen his body and shoved him into his soul room and then the glass had appeared, rose through the ground and ripped across his room. The glass barrier sealed him even farther away from the door and sealed him from most of the picture frames hung on his soul room's walls.

(His memories.)

The Voice would not be satisfied in just stealing his body, it had to steal his memories too. He knows he has forgotten, things about his mother and how he lived without the millennium ring have become fuzzy at best, and he knows he is forgetting. Ryou feels it, when he rests his head on the glass and something trickles out of him like sand in an hourglass. But he knows there was a time when he defeated the Voice. He won't allow himself to forget that day (and after so many other memories have faded, Ryou clings to this one with all force he has left in him – Yuugi, smiling at him and he got to smile back.)

If he could only return to his body, have full control (not the diluted version the Voice gives, but a real _life_) he would put a stop to whatever it was the Voice was planning.

No matter what it takes.

His reflection's expression hardens and his eyes narrow. Ryou almost looks like…

Pointless.

Such thoughts were pointless.

He's changed. He _knows_ that.

But then as if to mock him, his reflection looks as innocent as ever.

Ryou, frustrated and trapped and hopeless, throws himself at the glass.

(_Please just let it shattered, like it break – even just a crack, please, please, pleasepleaseplease._)

The glass remains perfectly flawless. Ryou can already see a bruise forming along his arm. A wave of déjà vu hits him and Ryou has to step away from the glass. He's going to go crazy here. He can feel it in the way tears will no longer fall down.

The Voice, the spirit that dwells in the millennium ring is using his body to hurt Yuugi. (Yuugi, who was kind and so trusting, who did nothing bad other than wanting to be his friend.)Ryou knows it. It's not even a matter of when; he knows the spirit is doing it right now.

The glass blocking the door of his soul room is unbreakable.

The Voice is going to hurt Yuugi.

And there is nothing he could do to stop it.

Ryou, devastated, overwhelmed broken, slides down the glass. He buries his face in his heads, trying to rid himself of such horrible (truthful) thoughts.

They don't go away.

There are footsteps and quick as lightning Ryou is on his feet. It's the Voice, and even if he really is just a shell of his former self, Ryou will not let the Voice see him so broken. He will not give him the satisfaction.

The door to his soul opens with a loud creak and Ryou expects to see not one but two reflections through the glass.

Instead, he sees a boy with bright lilac colored eyes, tan skin, blonde hair…and a millennium item.

"And who are you?" The boy says, voice oozing confidence.

Ryou stares, speechless. This boy is in his soul and is asking him who he is?

"You look like Bakura," He says as he walks along the glass wall, never taking his eyes off Ryou, "But you're not him."

"I am Bakura," Ryou says firmly (because he is and there is nothing the Voice can do to take that away from him), "Who are you?"

The boy gives him a look; one that makes Ryou feel incredibly violated like the boy is looking through him and judging him with to high of standards.

"Oh, I see. You must be his host. Yeah, I think he talked about you once."

His host. Ryou cringes at that.

"How do you know about that?" Ryou asks, eyebrows creasing.

"We're partners, for the time being," and as an afterthought he adds, "My name's Malik."

"Partners?" Ryou can't hide the fear in his voice.

"Yeah."

"You made a deal with the spirit of the millennium ring?" Ryou gasps. It was unfathomable, the thought of the Voice working _with_ someone and not just controlling them but with. How was that even possible?

"Yes, I just said that. You're not very smart are you?"

The boy doesn't even bother to look at him when he says this; he is too busy fiddling with Ryou's picture frames and brushing the dust off the walls.

"Could you please stop that!" Ryou exclaims, because even the Voice shows more respect for his soul room then this Malik does and Ryou can't just stand there and watch his soul be vandalized.

Malik turns his attention back to Ryou.

"So what's your name?"

"I told you," Ryou sighs, "It's Bakura."

"He's name is Bakura. And you can't both be named Bakura. That's just stupid."

"My first name is Ryou. But everyone calls me –," Ryou stops midsentence as what Malik says finally processes.

Malik still only looks vaguely interested.

"We are _not_ both named Bakura!" Ryou shouts exasperated, "_He_ stole that name from me and my family. _He_ doesn't have a name or a body, both of those he took from me! _He_ is just a voice."

(_I won't, _**I won't**_ let you become anymore than that._)

Malik rolls his eyes.

"You're just as temperamental as he is."

Ryou feels like he's going to puke. "I am nothing like him!"

"Whatever, _Ryou_," Malik sneers.

("Whatever, Ryou. I know my big brother well enough to know you'd never tell on me!")

"Don't call me that," Ryou says voice dangerously low.

Malik, sensing the challenge, steps closer to the thin wall of glass that separates them.

"I'll call you whatever I'd like. You're weak, that much is obvious. What could you possibly do to stop me?"

All at once everything Ryou hates about himself is exposed. Malik is right; there was nothing he could to do.

(And if being the owner of the millennium ring had taught him anything, it was that no matter how hard he tried, there was nothing he could ever do.)

Ryou shrinks away from the glass.

"Please… just go away. Why are you even here? _How_ are you even here?" Ryou honestly didn't mean for so many questions, they just exploded out of him.

"Millennium rod," Malik says and it glows slightly in his hands. "And I thought I should have a look around in my new tool's mind."

"Tool?" Ryou questions with somewhat of a scoff. The Voice was many things, but tool wasn't one of them.

"I'm sorry," Malik leers, "Did I offend you? Are you two friends or something? Does he keep you locked away to protect you?"

"We're not friends," Ryou says and when he hears how hurt his voice sounds he quickly adds, "I hate him."

Malik is a bit taken a back from the bluntness of the statement, but soon he regains his arrogance when he snorts at Ryou.

"What about my other questions?" Ryou inquires, hesitantly.

It was strange; even though his mind was being invaded by Malik he wasn't as angry as he should be. (Ryou almost _wants_ to talk with him.) Though both Malik and the Voice see Ryou as something to use, perhaps Malik was…what did his father call it?...the lesser of two evils.

A horrific thought consumes him.

(_Is that what you think about me, Yuugi-kun? I am the lesser of your two evils?_)

He is snapped out of his thoughts when Malik actually responds.

"I came here because this was the only door I could open," Malik says with a shrug.

"Why did you make a deal with him in the first place?" Ryou feels his heart racing now in anticipation for the answer.

"Simple," Malik says and leans about against one of Ryou's soul room's walls, "We both had something to gain from each other. He wants the millennium rod and I want Yuugi dead."

"What?" Ryou cries and suddenly his world is spinning very fast. Just when he almost – No, not Yuugi, he _had_ to protect Yuugi! He takes in a breath, and tells himself that knowing Malik's plan would help him at least try to stop it (even if only a part of him wants to hear Malik talk for that reason.)

"Why Yuugi?" Ryou asks, calmer now but still frazzled.

Malik's face which had previously just been home to a permanent sneer was now twisted into some awful mix of several emotions. But he does not respond.

"Why?" Ryou asks again; completely desperate.

He wants to know, _needs_ to know. Why does he hate Yuugi so much? He was used to the Voice's hatred for Yuugi but the Voice was the darkness, so it was in his nature to hate the light. But this boy, he did not seem as otherworldly as the Voice does. Malik, that's his name (and is that part of it, knowing that he actually has a name?)seems human. Angry and arrogant, but human none the less.

Malik stiffens.

"Why?" Ryou pleads again and places a hand against the glass. He must know why Malik wants to kill Yuugi (he needs to know that even someone as good as Yuugi can be flawed, he needs to know that there might still be hope for someone like him, who is flawed and damaged but maybe not beyond repair…).

"The Pharaoh will pay for what he has done to me…" Malik whispers so quietly Ryou is sure that if it wasn't for the fact that he could hear everything in his soul room ("Hey, Ryou! Mum and I are going to the grocery store, you should come with us!" **every ** "Your mother and sister aren't coming home, son." **thing**.)he would have missed it.

The Pharaoh will pay for what he has done.

That phrase is so familiar to Ryou now; he has begun to accept that the Pharaoh must have been awful. But the past is the past and it's not Yuugi's fault the millennium puzzle chose him. (Just like…just maybe…it's not his fault the millennium ring chose him?) He should not have to bear the consequences for his other actions. No one should.

Ryou stares at the glass, hopelessness threatening to consume him once more. (_I'll never be able to protect you, will I Yuugi-kun? I'll never be able to make up for the darkness I've brought to you._) Lazily, he claws at the glass even though he knows it won't break.

Malik, who had returned to looking at Ryou's picture frames, now looks at Ryou and the glass. He strolls towards them both.

"I could probably break this," Malik muses and taps the glass with the water. A ripple shudders through the glass and Ryou looks up at Malik amazed.

"You could set me free!" he says astonished. Ryou's brown eyes bore into Malik with hope and expectance; Malik looks at him with disdain.

Malik gives it another tap.

"Yes, I could."

For the first time in what feels like eternity, Ryou smiles.

"So you'll let me out?"

"No," Malik scoffs.

Ryou is devastated. He can't even fully comprehend.

"Wwwhy…why not?" Ryou stutters out.

"Why should I?" Malik sneers.

"Why shouldn't you?! Do you know what it's like to have your body stolen from you? Stolen from the darkness that lies within you? To be trapped within yourself, to have to see all the horrible things someone does with your body and not be able to protect the ones you care about?" Ryou's voice breaks several times, but he doesn't care anymore.

He means all those words and if something doesn't change soon he doesn't know how much longer he'll last.

"Malik, please."

Before Malik can response, the door to Ryou's soul is opened. The Voice, wearing a distorted version of Ryou's own image, saunters into his soul.

Ryou feels the blood rush to his face and the pure rage he experiences at the sight of the Voice makes him light-headed.

"Yadonushi," The Voice says with an odd mix of regality and indifference.

"Koe," Ryou says with an odd mix of hate and awe.

Malik looks at them incredulously and then snorts. (He seems to have forgotten all Ryou had told him just moments before.)

"Koe? Yadonushi? So you _both_ have cute little nicknames for each other?"

Malik chuckles at his own joke and Ryou feels his fist clenching. That boy had no right to be here (inside of his mind – his soul) much less be making fun of him. He realizes that he is shaking, for once not out of fear but anger – pure anger with a hint of betrayal even if he had just only meet this boy (he remembers – "You've always been such a bad judge of character, yadonushi." – )it doesn't change the fact that he had trusted him…and to think that he was parading around Ryou's mind like he owned it – like Ryou was nothing more than a vessel, a _**host**_ – …made Ryou so angry, so frustrated he couldn't even think. Couldn't even breathe. All Ryou ever wanted was to fight his own battles (alone, like he deserves, like it should always be and if had just accepted that fact sooner he never would have befriended Yuugi, never would have touched the puzzle, and heard that voice…) and all he wants is for Malik to just –

"Get out," the spirit says, his voice even but his eyes flashing dangerously.

Ryou turns from the glass, bale rising in his throat. He doesn't care who wins the spat they're having. He doesn't care about either of them. He just wants them _out_. Besides there is no such thing as choosing a lesser evil. Evil is evil. There is only black and white. He should know that by now. Once condemned, no one deserves salvation.

(Not even…not even him.)

Time passes. He loses more of himself.

He hears footsteps, not of just one person but of two. Ryou presses closer to the glass. It had to be the Voice and Malik. Both of them, together.

This couldn't be good.

The Voice steps in first, scowling deeply. Malik follows shortly thereafter wearing a very pleased smirk.

(Ryou's heart begins to beat frantically.)

"Well, do it!" Malik leers to the Voice, "Don't you want to win the duel?"

The Voice glares at Malik but lifts his hand up and –

And – (the glass becomes like water and he falls through it – )

And! (He's falling, tumbling, watching all the things he had experienced in his soul room drift away from him and old memories forgotten come back to him –)

He feels it before he sees it.

Pain.

("It hurts! It hurts!")

Sharp and hot like fire in his left arm, and instinctively he reaches out to clutch it and finds a bandage and blood and a duel disk – and what's is going on?! Ryou looks up around him to see monstrous eyes and lips in a blood red sky. And floating cards? A duel, is he in a duel?

Ryou looks up a sees Yuugi.

Yuugi!

His heart swells and all of a sudden he feels a lot safer, but still very confused.

"Yuugi-kun!" Ryou calls, because he trusts him and knows that Yuugi will help him, "Where am I? Why am I here? Why do I have this wound?"

"Bakura!" Yuugi shouts but does not answer even of his questions. He says something to a man in a cloak next to him, but Ryou doesn't understand any of it. The pain is so great, he can't really think about anything else. Though, his mind does catch the word Malik and it sounds vaguely familiar.

Everything blurs together, though he knows for certain that he is in pain and Yuugi is not helping…

And suddenly he is ripped from his body and sent back into the depths of his own mind.

Then, he remembers.

Ryou looks out from his soul room, (for once he is on the other side of the glass) and sees something incredible.

The Voice must have really hated Malik's partnership or maybe the Voice could have even –

(Don't you dare, he warns himself, don't you dare think that he could have possibly wanted to save _you_ because of _you_…)

"Koe," he calls out from his empty mind.

No. The spirit of the ring was not good. (He needed to stop thinking such thoughts!) He was darkness. Pure and simple.

(Simplicity, he just wants simplicity. He wants to know who to hate, who to protect and who would protect him. Those roles should be static and not ever-shifting like they had become.)

"Thank you," Ryou says and for once he is not sure if the Voice could hear him or not.

As the spirit is banished (though Ryou knows in the pit of his stomach it is only a matter of time before he comes back) Ryou slowly fades back into control of his body.

He is surrounded by people who do a great job pretending that they care about him. Ryou feels consciousness drift away from him and he allows it. He doesn't want to think.

He doesn't want to change his mind about who was right and who was wrong.

(_No lesser of two evils, just good and bad, because that decision is so much easier to make_…)

Ryou returns to his soul room.

Time passes. He loses more than he regains.

The Voice comes back (it always does) and Ryou can do nothing but endure being pushed back through the glass.

The glass is not as strong as it usually is. When Ryou pounds on it with all his force sometimes it actually cracks. The Voice must be using most of his power on something else. Like shadows…

So the Voice must be preparing for a game of darkness. But with who? Ryou racks his mind for possibilities but finds that he doesn't care. Whoever it was, it wasn't Yuugi. And maybe if it had been Yuugi he still wouldn't have cared… –

(And, regardless, he couldn't save them anyway.)

He sinks to the floor of his soul room (hardwood floor, like the house he and his father lived in for a year after his family died) and bows his head.

There is no hope.

(Was there, was there ever? He couldn't remember…)

The sound of footsteps breaks Ryou from his misery. The door of his soul opens and a boy with blonde hair and a millennium item steps in.

Malik.

"What are you doing here?" He laments, "Can't you just leave me alone?"

(_I just want to be alone._)

Malik looks away, almost guiltily, but holds his head high nonetheless. He takes a step closer to Ryou.

"You once asked me even if I knew what it was like to be trapped. To not be able to protect the ones you care about…I know what it's like now…to have the darkness steal away your body," Malik says, stepping closer to the glass.

Ryou perks up; his mouth is pressed in a hard line signaling disbelief, but his eyes are hopeful. (His eyes always betray him.)

Something passes through Malik's eyes and Ryou knows that Malik is talking more to himself than Ryou.

"But I won't let him kill Rishid!"

(_"I won't let you hurt Yuugi!"_)

Ryou doesn't know who Rishid is, but if someone like Malik cares about him he must be good.

Malik presses a hand to the glass and the action startles Ryou.

"You have to understand, I can't let Rishid die. And I don't know where…I don't have anywhere else to go…"

"…I understand."

Ryou however cannot look Malik in the eyes.

"You're not here to free me are you?" Ryou asks.

Malik shakes his head, "No."

Ryou is not surprised, and he does not look up at Malik's face.

"Another deal with _him_ right?" Ryou accuses. Malik nods.

"My darkness, we are going to duel him. Together, I know we can beat him – I have to stop him. I'll give him the rod afterwards, as long as I can get my body back. But if we lose…we lose everything. That's the reason I'm working with him, to make sure the game of darkness goes our way. There's a saying about this right? Something about the lesser of two evils," Malik chuckles, but it is different than usually. It has humility.

"And your darkness isn't so bad. Not like – " Malik stops himself and Ryou is glad. He doesn't think he can take anymore.

"You don't know anything about him," Ryou hisses and turns his gaze away from Malik and to the empty frames of his mind.

Malik follows his gaze and for once keeps his mouth shut.

They stand there like that for some time; Malik looking at Ryou and Ryou looking away.

"If you ever get out of here," the lilac eyed boy says, breaking the silence, "You probably won't remember any of this."

"I won't," Ryou says, because it has happened before (and again and again) and it is always the same. He remembers all that happens within the walls of his soul, but when he is outside of them, he remembers none of it.

(_**Nothing.**_)

"That's good."

Ryou wonders if that's Malik apology.

Whatever it was, Malik's eyes are sincere. So finally Ryou presses his hand to the glass where Malik's hand is too.

"Why are you here?" he asks quietly.

Malik looks at him and there is dullness in his eyes.

Ryou looks at him with disgust, but more pity than anything else.

"If we lose, you'll be sent to the shadows too."

Ryou tenses, but forces himself to calm down. It's not that big of deal. He's not that important, as long as it meant that somehow Yuugi would be safe (he still wants Yuugi to be safe, because it was the Pharaoh who refused to help him, not Yuugi, Yuugi would always help…),he wouldn't mind never seeing light again.

"But why are you telling me this? Why not tell him?"

"He already knows. I just thought you deserved to know, too."

Ryou eyes (against his will) light up with hope again. Deserved – that word meant that someone thought he had been worth something. No one ever thought he was worth anything, not his father, and most definitely not the Voice – only Yuugi had ever hinted but that wasn't the same as saying…

Malik turns to leave.

It was darkness against darkness. Either way evil was going to win. There was no lesser, but if the Voice won Ryou would still have a shot at (Redemption? Salvation?) protecting Yuugi. Besides the Voice had come back for him, had saved him (for whatever reasons, Ryou doesn't want to know, Ryou doesn't think he can handle it if the status quo changes) and maybe it was okay to just this once, (just this once) side with the Voice.

"**Koe**. _Malik_. Yuugi-kun," Ryou whispers.

His reflection looks at him with wide brown eyes. Inside of them he sees a desire for all three of them to be content, even if all their plans and hopes and goals contradict (and even if wanting them all to be happy is a contradiction as well, after all the things he has said and meant) –

"I hope you win."

* * *

A/N Two days of editing and I'm still not happy with the way it turned out. Ugh. At least I wrote something within canon this time. A nice break from all the post-canon oneshots. Also, if Ryou's dialogue seems a bit wonky during the duel, it's because it's taken directly from the fansubs of the anime.

Anyway, I hope you like it and review it! =D


	40. Making New Friends

A/N Dialogue only. Takes places in Separation continuity, because of separate bodies and fanon etc.

* * *

_The making of friends, who are real friends, is the best token we have of a man's success in life ~ Edward Everett Hale_

* * *

"Are you just going to stand there and watch him all night, are you going to enjoy the bar too, Bakura?"

"Malik. Your presence never ceases to annoy."

"Yeah, I missed you too. So I'll ask you again, are going to just watch Ryou have fun or are you going to have a couple drinks yourself?"

"Go away."

"If you weren't so stubborn you would see that he really wants to be your friend, too. I mean, it's Ryou of all people, he forgave you ages ago and you still just sulk around or ignore him. You should just try talking to him for once; instead of just looming in the shadows all scowls and glares. I don't find it the least bit intimating, but you know Ryou. He can be such a girl."

". . . Perhaps you should be more worried about your other than mine, _Malik_. Where is he, anyway?"

"Oh he and Rishid are trying to get past their differences. Bonding time, you know?"

"…And he agreed to that _willing_?"

"Ha! No. I tied him to a chair while he slept."

"..."

"I was wondering if something similar would work with you and Ryou."

"You _wouldn't_ **dare**."

"Maybe, maybe not. You know me, I can be very unpredictable. But maybe if you'd just go _talk_ to him…"

"**...!**"

"..."

"I'm doing this only so I don't have to listen to you talk anymore, brat."

"_Sure_, Bakura. I believe you."

* * *

A/N First attempt at dialogue only. How did it go? (And lol no parentheses! -is a sign of the apocalypse-)

Review, please!


	41. Another Normal Day

* * *

_First we make our habits, then our habits make us. ~ Charles C. Noble_

* * *

His alarm clock rings, and another day begins.

As always, Ryou wakes up at the first ring of his alarm. He never presses the snoozes button. He doesn't knows how long he'll be in control anymore and the few precious minutes of consciousness he has, he will not waste on sleep that will only be plagued by nightmares.

(Or worse, dreams.)

Ryou pushes the covers off of himself and then neatly makes his bed. He doesn't like an untidy house. Ryou is many things (too many for one person), but the one thing he can pride himself on is that he is not a slob.

Ever the busy body, Ryou brushes his teeth while he makes sure all the homework he had been assigned is finished. (It never is, at least not anymore, but Ryou checks regardless. He is a creature of habit.) When he is done brushing his teeth, he puts on his clothes and makes sure the ring is tucked carefully underneath his shirt.

He always lingers at this part. Always.

(_Maybe I could rip out; maybe it will be a part of me forever._)

Ryou dashes down the stairs, not because he is in a hurry, but because he does not want to catch his noise neighbor Mrs. Saito. She likes him and that was reason enough to avoid her. Walking to school was relatively easy, all things considered. Occasionally a girl or two would follow him, but most of them never made contact so the spirit of the ring kept to the ring. For now.

School was a different story. It always was a different story.

Yuugi.

It was all because of Yuugi. He would never say it was Yuugi's fault though, he would never blame Yuugi – because the spirit blames Yuugi and Ryou needs to keep some part of himself separate from the spirit, he needs to know that they are _different_. (Even if that is the most blatant of lies, because the spirit is his other, so therefore they are one in the same.)

He walks into school and like clockwork he is fifteen minutes early. The teacher's don't mind though, because he's quiet and harmless.

Quiet and harmless…

Well, at least half of that is true.

Ryou files into his homeroom seat even before Mr. Watanabe himself. He could work on all that unfinished homework, but he wouldn't understand it anyway. Most of the time he has no idea what is going on in any of his classes. So instead he stares out the window, committing every single thing he sees to memory. This way, he'll have a piece of freedom to keep him going when he is once again imprisoned in his soul room.

The first three periods blur together, they always do. Ryou enjoys that, though. Drifting through a day is better than actively fighting through one. Or not being part of it at all.

But he and Yuugi have fifth period together.

The spirit is restless then.

Not that the spirit is impulsive, no, if anyone knows patience it is his other. But the spirit is _restless_ and Ryou can feel control draining from him. The spirit wants control, the spirit wants power and Ryou can do nothing but spend the period holding desperately onto the tiny thread of power that's left. He is used to it though. Ryou spends every day fighting like this. In fact he doesn't even know who teaches this class, he is so preoccupied.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi calls from the seat to the right of him, "Are you paying attention?"

"Huh? Oh, well I suppose I dozed off there for a bit," Ryou smiles, "Sorry, Yuugi-kun."

(_So, so sorry._)

He hates himself, more than anything and everything, he hates himself. Yuugi doesn't deserve to be deceived, his only crime was just trying to be Ryou's friend and yet Ryou doesn't try to push Yuugi away. The spirit wants him to keep a modestly close relationship with Yuugi and Ryou will do it. (Because he can't, can't, survive trapped in soul room, he'll go crazy – go crazy for _good_…)

He is a coward.

This realization hits him every day and at 1:25 exactly Ryou heads to bathroom stall and vomits. There is laughter in the back of his mind, but he doesn't care as long as it _stays_ in the back of his mind.

The next period is always the worst because the lack of any sleep the night before (he knows the spirit does not let his body have any rest) finally catches up with him. And as Ms. Sasaki (or was it Ms. Suzuki?) drones on and on about something, Ryou begins to drift away.

He drifts out into the blue sky, the one he memorized at the beginning of the day and floats. For a minute, maybe ten, the floating doesn't matter – it's what happens next.

Ryou is flying. He is souring high above everything and enjoying himself (he is free!) until he looks down and sees the spirit, his other falling. It shouldn't, but his heart tightens and he flies towards his other and reaches for his hand.

Reaches, reaches, reaches…

And Ryou reaches out an unstained hand for his other, and his other reaches back (which amazes Ryou to no end and fills him with such joy. Yes, he wants to help his other and his other is _willing_ "Please, please let me help you!"). Their hands grasp tightly onto each other and then his other face twists into a smirk and he is pulling Ryou down, down, down into an abyss – a void, "where no one will ever find you, yadonushi. Where you will belong to Me, the Darkness, forever." – and he is falling, falling, falling –

He lands.

Ryou is broken and cold and alone (and it is so dark here, so very dark).

Then, suddenly a burst of light illuminates his dark hole and someone is calling his name. In the distant he can see Yuugi crying out for him, reaching out his hand for Ryou to take. He wants to pull Ryou back up.

And he tries to reach back for Yuugi, but in Yuugi's light he can see the blood on his hands. Two arms wrap around his torso and nails dig into his chest like the tassels of a ring. Whispers ("I've tainted you, yadonushi. You'll never be good enough, pure enough for them.") and Calls ("Bakura-kun! Tell me what's wrong, please. You know you can tell me anything.")

The calls are nice to listen. But the spirit of the millennium ring is right; his _other_ is right. Because Ryou can tell by the crimson smeared on his palms, _smeared_. The blood is not his and he did not put the blood on his hands. It was smeared, smeared when he reached out to help – (and the nails dig into his chest even deeper) –

The spirit.

"You." He trembles and shakes and tries not to cry.

The spirit leans in closer so he can hear.

"You got blood on my hands."

His other laughs (and laughs and laughs) until Ryou is laughing too, because it's just so funny – the blood, the blood it's so funny and red and all over his hands. It won't come off, it won't ever come off and that only makes Ryou laugh harder, and he just stares at his hands.

Just stares and stares. (Laughs and laughs.)

It's so funny after all, so very funny. There is blood on his hands.

There is blood on his hands.

The school bell rings and Ryou picks up his books quickly and quietly. He doesn't want to be noticed or make a scene. All he wants is to fade into the wall. The last period goes by quickly and the only hard thing left is to fake a smile at Yuugi as he leaves school.

He walks as slowly as he can home, savoring every minute of moving his muscles the way he desires. When he gets to his apartment complex, he even runs his hand along the railing relishing the feel of metal against his skin. He can't feel anything when he is locked away in his soul room, so anything he can feel he'll try his best to feel.

Ryou draws closer to his apartment door. The whispers are no longer just in the back of his mind.

The whispers, they say things, always, all day and every day the same things…

Whispers. ("There, yadonushi, are you satisfied? I've paid my rent.")

He ignores them.

Across the hall, Mrs. Saito was just leaving. She sees Ryou and smiles grandly.

"Hello there, Mr. Bakura! How was school today? Did you do anything interesting?"

Ryou smiles.

(_Whispers, whispers, whispers…_)

"Oh, you know Mrs. Saito, the usual."

* * *

A/N I AM SO SORRY THIS CHAPTER IS SO LATE AND SO SHORT. I really am. But my computer didn't work for like two days and then I started writing this chapter and it got way out of control to the point where I am seriously considering making it an entirely separate fic. So I wrote this oneshot in the original chapter's place.

But I hope you enjoyed this chapter, if only for the angst.

Reviews are loved!


	42. Acceptance

A/N Takes place post-series.

* * *

_A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are. ~ Unknown _

_

* * *

  
_

"And will that be all for you two tonight?" The waitress asks as she finishes writing down their order.

"Yes, thank you," says Ryou and he smiles. The waitress' eyes widen as if she is not used to such kindness but then heads back to the kitchen.

Across the table from Ryou, Malik snorts.

"You always do that," he half-scorns, half-sneers.

"Do what?" Ryou asks.

"When you smile, you close your eyes. I didn't think you knew, but I guess on some level you're aware of it."

The hairs on the back of Ryou's neck stand straight up and he tenses.

"Aware of what?" He asks and knows he'll regret it.

Malik smirks.

"Your eyes. It's like no matter how good you get at pretending – the laugh, the mannerisms – it's your eyes, Ryou. They always give it away."

Ryou breath catches and he tries to hide his surprise (his fear) with a glare. Malik chuckles under his breath.

"No need to get angry, it's not like _I_ mind. I liked him too."

Ryou stares at Malik for a long second. He knows he should be insulted (it is everything he'd ever hated), but some how can't help but find that little piece of acceptance…comforting.

* * *

A/N Yeah. Okay so my inspiration is running a little low so if you ever saw a quote you think might make a good oneshot, now is totally the time to request!

Hope you liked the chapter and please review!


	43. Of Memories & Time

A/N I don't even know guys. I don't. I really, really don't think this is tendershipping and I'm not sure it's friendship either. Dependency? Is that something? Anyway takes place in the Millennium World Arc right after Yuugi and co. defeat Zorc but before the Ceremonial Duel. Major thankies to **Bakura's Guardian Angel **who recommend the song.

**Bolding **- Yami no Bakura's memories.

_Italics _- Ryou's memories.

* * *

_I have woken now to find myself/I'm lost in shadows of my own/I'm longing to be lost in you ~ Away From Me, Evanescence. _

* * *

Time has passed.

Ryou doesn't know how much time (he never does) but he knows that it has come and gone. And is passing right now. He feels it, sitting alone in the corner of his dusty soul; he feels it slip away from him like desert sand through a closed fist. When he presses his hand to the walls, sometimes he can feel his own heartbeat and that is comforting because at least then he knows he is alive. He presses his ear to the wall and hopes for sound.

He hears it.

It's not soft murmuring voices like the sounds Ryou has heard in the past. No. It is loud and thunderous…and very far away. Ryou leans in closer, because never had something so strange entered his monotonous life while locked away in his soul room. It persists as it moves, as if whatever was making the sound was traveling parallel to Ryou's soul room. He scurries along the wall, trying to figure out what the sound is – a train, a thunderstorm – no, none of his world's sounds seemed right, this was something totally different…this was something –

The sound stops.

Eyebrows furrowed, Ryou arises to stare at his soul room's door. It couldn't be a coincide, after the past few years Ryou knows there is no such thing as coincides. He places his hand around the doorknob. It doesn't burn him like usually, but Ryou does not know if that is a good sign or not. The doorknob hadn't burned once before and Ryou had foolishly allowed himself to be hopeful and tried to open the door and then spirit had just laughed and laughed…

He tightens his grasp around the knob and ever so slowly (_please, oh please let this work_) he twists it and then gives the door a small push and a trickle of light comes into his soul room but the door is creaking, creaking – oh gosh someone might hear and **laugh** at him – creaking, creaking…

The door opens.

Wide.

Wide enough for Ryou to see the spirit of the millennium ring's soul room door is open too. Wide enough for Ryou to that the spirit's soul room is falling apart.

The spirit is standing in his doorway, a mirror image to Ryou, and blocking a complete view into the spirit's room. But Ryou does see some things, at the bottom of the spirit's feet. He sees sand.

(And blood.)

The spirit isn't even standing tall. He (he, Ryou decides to call him…only because he is stilling uses Ryou's form) is slouching, panting and his face is twisted by great pain.

Ryou **almost** feels sorry for him.

He takes a step forward (either towards the spirit or away from his soul room, Ryou didn't know which at the moment) but stops immediately. Never had he been allowed to be so free in his own head, why should now be any different?

But he is completely out of his soul room…and he is fine. No excruciating pain, no invisible force pushing him back in. He is standing in the hallway that connects both of their souls unscratched.

And the spirit isn't even doing anything to stop him.

He is just _lingering_ there, nails dug into his doorway and glaring at Ryou with deep bottomless brown eyes (that will betray no emotion, because Ryou has stared into those eyes long enough to have them memorized)… that have a hint of fear.

_**Fear**_.

Suddenly, Ryou's eyes widen and his own heart is gripped by fear. If the spirit is afraid of something (very afraid, if Ryou can see it so clearly in his eyes) then shouldn't Ryou be worried, too?

A loud cracking sound breaks Ryou out of his thoughts and he turns and looks back into his soul room to find one of his pictures has fallen right off the wall. Ryou stares, not knowing what to do. No matter how many times he had tried to tear those frames of the walls, they had never even budged. But now there was a frame, fallen and broken on his soul room's floor.

Out of instinct, Ryou moves toward t to place back on the wall, but before he can even make one step – the frame is gone. Dissolved into a light blue, almost white sphere of light, just floating there and then it rises like a small sun (slowly, very slowly) and it's just _floating_ there. Ryou takes a step closer and quicker then he has time to process the sphere turns into the beam and pushes through him making this horrible –

– _ripping sound, he is so familiar with that sound. How many times had he ruined a shirt by trying to struggle out of a bully's grasp? They always find him, no matter how many times he changes schools; they are attracted to him like moths to a flame. (He can __**burn**__ them too, if __**he**__ wants, if he __**wants**__…)No! He doesn't want any trouble, it is trouble that finds him, and he just wants them to go away. He doesn't want them to hurt._

_He doesn't want them to hurt._

_He doesn't – _

_Ryou lets out a strangled cry when the expected blow finally comes. A trickle of blood leaks out of his mouth (how __**dare**__ the do this to __**him**__!) and Ryou looks up with pleading eyes. The scene is so familiar…in the back of his mind he knows what happens next._

"_Please just leave me alone. Please," he begs, grovels and he is (__**weak**__, __**pathetic**__) just trying to save them from something he cannot seem to find the words to name._

"_Aw, does the little baby want his mommy?" The biggest one mocks, Ryou doesn't even know is name, all the bully's blur together in his mind…they are so very much the same. Familiar._

_(And Ryou knows what happens next…)_

_A kick this time, right to his chest. Ryou let's out a small, low scream at the one, the kick seemed to have pushed the tassels of his millennium ring into his chest and oh God, it hurts…_

_But __**he**__ welcomes the pain, and the blood leaking out of the corner of his mouth does not stop __**his**__ smirk. _

_Ryou sees the world go fuzzy and he feels like someone is dragging him down, down, down – _

_And everything goes – _

Ryou stumbles back, clutching the doorway of his soul room. He's panting and his face is twisted by great pain. He looks towards the spirit, hoping for a smirk or a laugh – any sort of sign that the spirit had done this too him, that the spirit was in control. But when he looks into eyes that for all extends and purposes are his own (yet so very dissimilar from him) he sees nothing but confusion…and pain.

"Did…did you feel that?" Ryou asks and immediately regrets it. They had never spoken, not really. The spirit did not talk to him; it simply did what he wanted to Ryou without any sort of conversation. Occasionally, he would hear directions or snide remarks in the back of his head but they were never directed to him. It was more like the spirit was talking about him, but Ryou was never really there. And Ryou did not talk to the spirit because the spirit was something taboo and omnipotent, something that Ryou could not talk too. He would have nothing to say.

But all the reasons and analysis were pointless now, because the question had been asked. The spirit glares at him (**hates** _him_) but slowly nods. It sends shivers down Ryou's spine, because the spirit had always been in control. But now, the spirit had not controlled, he had reacted.

(Maybe even malevolent gods are only human…)

The spirit opens his mouth to say something but a beam of dark blue light flies out of the back of his soul room and straight through the spirit's heart. Before Ryou realizes that the exact same thing had just occurred to him moments ago, the dark blue light bursts from the spirit's chest and is now flying towards him! Ryou covers his head and braces for impact and everything goes –

– **black. Pitch black, darker than the nights he lives in – the nights have stars and the moon but here there was only blackness. The thief tries to move his arms, but they are bound by rope. How very foolish. With ease that could only be accomplished from years of experience, he wiggles out of his bonds. He doesn't even have to use his knife. Those that had captured him must not have realized who they were dealing with.**

**He was a king.**

**The thief can feel his village smiling at him, proud of his accomplishments. They were always so quick to doubt him, doubt his passion – even though he was born out of their hate and he only lived to serve their revenge – doubt his **_**strength**_**. But he always conquered in the end. He always got what he wanted. **

**He hears the guards approaching; he'll be free faster than he'd ever dared to hope.**

**Then he would set all of Egypt – the world even! – on fire for his village. For their justice, so they could be happy and proud and **_**together**_** they would watch the fires burn and burn and burn and – **

Ryou lets out a gasp as he falls backwards.

"Yyyou," he stutters, "Was that you?"

The spirit looks up at Ryou from across the room (somehow the blow from the light had knocked him to his knees) and glares. With his sleeve he wipes blood from the corner of his mouth, like the way Ryou had done so many times when he faced bullies.

Horrified, Ryou looks down and finds his wrists have rope burns.

"Us, yadonushi, us," The spirit says, the words come out pained and stunted but give Ryou goose bumps nonetheless.

The spirit returns his gaze to the ground and claws desperately at his doorway, trying to get up. He can't.

Instinctively, Ryou goes towards the spirit to help him (because Ryou is always trying to put broken things back **together**, ever since he was a child) but before he can reach him something tears through his chest and Ryou can feel it –

– _burn. He feels his heart burn every time he looks at a picture of Amane laughing and his mother smiling (though his father has taken most of them down, there is still that picture hanging in his room). He feels it burn every time his father looks at him with cold, dark eyes. Ryou wonders if he would be looking at Amane with the same eyes if he had let her out of the car first (like she'd wanted) and Ryou had been the one still in the car when the drunk driver plowed into them. Ryou would have been the one trapped as the fire burned (and __**burned**__ and burned) and it would be Ryou hooked up to all those wires and beeping machines now instead of Amane. If that had happened, would his father look at Amane the way he looks at him? Would he hate Amane the way he hates him?_

_And even though he is young, he knows better than to ask. He just might get an answer._

_He feels it burn the worst though right now, when he is riding in their other car (the car that wasn't burned). The car is so empty. There is no Amane making her demands heard loud and clear, no Mother to quiet her down. There is his father, but he hasn't told Ryou one story since Amane and his mother have been in the hospital, so he might as well be gone too. _

_He'll tell Amane a story though, when they get to the hospital. And Ryou will get to hold her hand and ask her to wake up, beg her to wake up but by the time the story is over, Amane will still be asleep._

_He heard the doctor once say she'd never wake up, but Ryou doesn't believe him. Amane always overslept. On weekends she'd sleep till noon! So she was just sleeping extra late. Ryou was sure one of these stories would wake her up and then she'd would bounce on Mother and get her to wake up, too. _

_(His father must believe the doctor though, because Amane's room has already been packed up.)_

_They park the car and Ryou follows his father into hospital. Before the reach Amane's room, his father grabs Ryou wrists. His father pulls Ryou towards him and gazes long into Ryou eyes. Ryou stares back, and finds his father's eyes are red and puffy._

"_Now, when you go in there I want you to tell your sister that you love her –,"_

"_I always tell her that," Ryou interrupts, confused. His father frowns and his grip tightens. It hurts._

"_I know. But this will be the last time you get to tell her that, __**son**__. This is goodbye." _

_Ryou blinks. "Is Amane moving?"_

_His father closes his eyes, when he opens them again they are even redder than they had been before. _

"_Yes. She and your mother are moving some place real far away, but really nice too. Better than here, so much better…"_

_This time Ryou frowns. "Why are they moving? When can we visit them?"_

"_We will see them again. Someday. Just not for a very long time. Trust me, this – this is for the best. Do you understand Ryou?"_

_No! He wants to scream, he doesn't understand at all. He wants to scream and shout and cry but most of all he wants Amane and his mother to wake up so he won't be alone anymore, so he won't have to look in his father's eyes and see nothing but coldness…_

_But he doesn't. He just nods and walks into Amane's room._

_(Amane was always the screamer, Ryou was always the quite one.) _

_Ryou looks back at his father, who is standing in the doorway._

"_Aren't you coming?" He asks meekly. His father shakes his head._

"_I'm going to see your mother right now. I'll be back though, in a little while."_

_Ryou doesn't like his father's tone of voice. It is cracked and shaky; it makes Ryou feel scared. But he nods anyway and turns back to Amane._

_She looks very peaceful…but not at all happy. He'd long ago given up hope that she'd ever look like herself, (her face was too badly burned and she never smiled her crocked grin in her sleep) but he'd hope she would have at least look happy._

_He just wants her to be happy, because when she's happy he's happy. _

_Ryou touches a scratch on the unburned side of her face. The doctors probably think it's from the accident but it's not. Ryou did that too her. They had been climbing a tree (Ryou had only done it so Amane wouldn't get in as much trouble if they got caught) and Ryou was helping her to the next branch. He'd offered her his hand and she took it, but not before making Ryou promises that he wouldn't let go, that he'd never let go and he'd promised. Then Amane had taken his hand (her hands were warm and sweaty) and Ryou pulled her up but too soon he let go – _

_He let go._

_And she fell and scratched her face against the branch._

_All because he let go._

_So now Ryou holds her hand extra tight, so he really won't ever let go when she needs him but it's not the same. Because Amane's hands shouldn't be this cold and clammy, and she shouldn't look so pale and __**lifeless**__… _

_And suddenly he is crying into his sister's hair, apologizing for every wrong he'd every did to her and promising he'd do better, he'd be a good big brother if Amane would just __**wake**__**up**__ and soon that all disappears and the only thing coherent in his sobs are – _

"_I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm – "_

Ryou is collapsed on the floor now, tears streaming down his face. He doesn't want to remember that, doesn't want to think of that last time he saw his sister before his father…no! He didn't want to remember!

"You're pathetic," the spirit sneers, still at his doorway while Ryou is lying in the middle of their hallway.

Ryou looks at the spirit with red and puffy eyes that are wide with shock. Even though he should be used to it, the cruel words and evil actions, every time they occur it is fresh betrayal. Because Ryou had always trusted the spirit, it _was_ in his nature to trust. **Was**.

"You're weak. Just like the **pain** you feel. Heh! You know _nothing_ of true pain," the spirit continues, spitting words at him like venom.

Ryou shakes his head in disbelief. Even though the spirit is so clearly dying on the floor, even though Ryou is here dying with him he still, _still_ finds ways to make Ryou suffer.

"I hate you," he says and has never been more certain of anything in his life.

The spirit smirks wickedly and laughs, laughs even as the dark blue beam plunges through him.

It plunges through Ryou next, forever imprinting Ryou's distorted face of hate into his soul. And suddenly he regrets the words, suddenly he is almost –

– " – **Sorry."**

**He sees lots of guards that night, but that is the only one that apologizes. The guard whispers it as he drags the little boy's **_**mother**_** (her belly swollen with a child) away. The little boy stares, frozen with fear. When he tries to call his mother's name, no words come out. **

**Soon more guards come and they drag everyone else away. Everyone, all his friends and neighbors are screaming and crying, so he starts **_**crying**_**. Because he can't scream. Ever. **

**All the people around him are gone now, the guards having gone with them too. The little boy picks himself up and sneaks along the shadows. He needs to find his family. He can't be alone.**

**The little boy hears the screaming before anything else. Is not like any screaming he has ever heard before. Even the fathers are screaming this low deep eternal scream. They sound like monsters, not villagers – not his family.**

**He creeps along the wall, staying at of sight just the way his father had taught him. The little boy looks down and sees the sand by his feet is bloody. Then he sees them. Familiar faces screaming as flesh is melted off the bones, hands reaching up for salvation but the Pharaoh's guards push them back into the vat. The flesh falls off and he can see their bones – and they are still **_**screaming**_**! **

**And the little boy watches, protected by the shadows. Watches and can't scream. **

**They've spotted him. The guards' cold, emotionless eyes turn to him and the little boy turns and starts to run. The guards chase him, shouting commands and threats but the little boy does not stop running for anything. And even when the guards give up, he just keeps running. Running forever and – **

Ryou coughs hard, like someone had just been choking him. He looks at the spirit – who is glaring and snarling but Ryou can see the hint of a trembling child locked away deep in his eyes.

He tries to speak, but there are no words.

There is silence in their souls until hesitantly, very unsure, cautiously Ryou reaches out his hand.

Then, the common feeling of being ripped in two. Would this keep happening forever and–

– _Ever. That's how long it feels like he has been waiting. Forever and ever. _

_Ryou just wants to see Akira (his friend, his friend, Akira had said it himself while Ryou had set up the Monster World board), it shouldn't be taking so long. It didn't take this long to see Amane._

_Soon (but not soon enough) a nurse strolls out the room and motions him inside._

_Ryou can't look the nurse in the eye when he asks, "Has anything changed?"_

_The nurse shakes her head._

_Ryou's posture slumps even more. When he opens the door he finds that what the nurse said was true. Nothing has changed. The flowers are the same as they were when he came last week (of course someone must have changed them because otherwise Ryou would see some signs of decay), the machine that Akira is hooked up to beeps monotonously, just as it had before. Even Akira himself is in the same position he was when Ryou last visited him. Akira doesn't move._

_Not ever._

_Ryou pulls the chair right next Akira's bedside and sits down. Most of the boy's visitors held his hand or told him stories, but Ryou never did. People noticed that too. Once the nurse had told him that they say people can understand you while they sleep and that he could try talking to him._

_(Talking, or apologizing, or crying, begging, promising to never let go and __**lying**__.) But Ryou is older now, fifteen years old instead of nine, and he will not delude himself._

"_He's not sleeping," he had said to the nurse, and the nurse never once tried to give Ryou advice again. _

_Akira doesn't stir. Ryou's not sure if he even breathes. _

_He watches intently, trying to figure it out, trying to decipher what had happened to his friendly raven-haired classmate. _

_(Somewhere, deep down inside of him, he already knows the answer.)_

_**You did.**_

_And before he realizes it he is crying and apologizing (because it is all his fault, Akira only went into a coma after they played the game that __**he**__ had wanted too). He grabs Akira's hand only to find that it's cold and clammy, like Amane's was, – like Amane's was!_

_Ryou's bolts out the chair and runs down the hallway. Escaping. He couldn't stay, not with him. He runs faster and faster, just thinking of how he has to get out of here, he has to get – _

Ryou barely has time to catch his breath before he sees the dark blue beam coming from the spirit's soul room.

His hand is still reaching –

– **Out.**

**He is finally out of the millennium ring's darkness. Not that he minded, he **_**was**_** the darkness but now that he was free he could move along with his plan. Spread the darkness across the world.**

**He stands, for the first time in millennia. Soon his soul – or the bits and pieces that are left of it – form around him into his room. The door finishes last and he eagerly opens it. It has been a long time since he'd had a host, after all. Excitement was only natural. **

**The door opens and across from it his sees another door. It is a soft white with a golden knob, the painting is peeling a little bit at the bottom but that was the only thing of interest about it. It was very plain. **

**He smirks. What fortunate luck to have a host that would be so easy to break. But that would before another time, he thinks as he retreats back to his soul room. For now he needs to watch and plan. Because this time, he wouldn't lose and the Pharaoh would pay. This time he would – **

The spirit reaches back for Ryou. Clutching, Ryou's wrist, the spirit pulls Ryou straight into his chest.

And _holds_ **him**.

It's the strangest hug Ryou has ever had. It's not affectionate or gentle, the way his mother held him. It's not playful and hard, the way Amane would hug him. It's tight and possessive…and desperate? In fact, to Ryou it really isn't even a hug. It was more like a cling.

The spirit is clinging to him.

(Ryou lays his head down on the spirit's chest, and clings to him, too.)

**I** need _you_, _I_ need **you**…

Two beams of blueish light enter through them both at once. As it does, Ryou realizes what is happening could never be stopped. They could never –

**– win. He knows already that he will.**

**They underestimate him, don't suspect him soon enough because he is still a child. This is partly true. But when they look at him, all they see is a beggar child. **

**They do not see a thief.**

**And he is one too, more of a thief and less of a child and one day he will be the greatest thief there ever was. **

**It's all he has.**

– _win. Ryou already knows he will. His played this game about a million times now; he has it down to a science. And besides, his opponent wasn't even a real person, it was a computer._

_He looks at his father, who is focused intently on driving. Ryou turns back to his hand-held game. Though he'd never tell his father, he really hated video games. It wasn't the same playing against a computer as it was to playing against someone who could think and breathe. Plus, controllers could never be the same as rolling dice and moving game pieces._

_And the video games his father bought him regularly did not make up for a lack of any sort of conversation between them. Ever. Ryou just wants to talk to his father, laugh with his father. Like he used to when he was young._

**The guards are chasing him again, away from this village because they have finally figured it out. But he can out run them. He's a fast runner. But something happens, he trips and falls. Now they are gaining on him now the little thief is not so sure he will win.**

**They are standing above him now, spears in their hands. The kingdom does not take kindly to thieves, they sneer and he doesn't bother telling that he hates their kingdom, hates their Pharaoh. **

**The little thief keeps his eyes wide open, so he can see death approach. And escape it of course, because there was always a way out. But before he can even think of a plan, a white mist wraps its self around the guard. He chokes and sputters but the other guards are fighting against the same white mist.**

**The next second they are all on the ground dead.**

_His father looks at him from his mirror. (He never lets Ryou sit in the front seat.)_

"_**Son**__," his father says._

"_Yes?" Ryou looks up and his voice is a little boy hopeful._

"_I think it's time we talked."_

_Ryou's eyes fall and he gives a small nod. "Talking" with his father never lead to anything good. _

**The little thief stands up and faces the mist. He is not afraid. It seems…familiar. The mist collects itself and soon he can see the faces screaming in terror and arms reaching for help that won't ever come.**

**His **_**family**_**. **

**The mist embraces him and shows him images of that night. He glares and tells him that he remembers, he remembers every single day. They agree with him and **_**son**_**, they say **_**son**_** we need you to help us. **

**Of course, he says, anything. Anything.**

"_You pretty old now right. Fifteen years old, I mean –"_

"_I'm fourteen, I just turned fourteen," Ryou says and looks away._

_His father laughs awkwardly. _

"_Of course! Anyway, I've just been offered the chance of a lifetime, __**son**__. The want me lead the archeological dig in Cairo, Egypt!"_

**And they tell him. Tell him what he needs to do, how they know he needs to grow up first, but one day he will be strong enough to face the Pharaoh. He believes them, because he is still partly a child. The mist tells him where to go to next and then starts to fade away.**

**No, he screams like they screamed. Where are you going?**

**They turn to him, the mist forming faces half melted away. They tell him to calm himself, that they will never be to far from here. They say that they will always be with him.**

**That is not enough for the little thief.**

_Ryou smiles, his father seems so excited._

"_So we're moving to Egypt?" Ryou sounds a little excited too. _

"_Well, no. I was thinking you should stay here in Japan. You've already got use to it and I think it would be a lot better for your education. Plus, you'd probably be so bored if you came with me," his father laughs again. Ryou doesn't like that laugh._

"_So…I'm going to be living by myself?" Ryou whispers._

"_Won't it be fun, Ryou? Every teenagers dream! Think of it as an adventure. Doesn't that sound fun?"_

_Ryou stares at his feet and gives a small nod. _

"_Good." _

**Promise me, he shouts at them, Promise me you'll never leave! They laugh sinisterly and swarm about him, promising to never his side until he avenges him, but the little thief doesn't like that at all. He doesn't want them to leave. Not ever. **

_Please don't leave me; Ryou screams silently, I don't want to be alone. Please, please, please._

**Don't leave me.**

_Don't leave me._

Don't leave me.

That one thought rings from their soul rooms in perfect unison.

For a split second Ryou…hope isn't the word – needs, Ryou needs the spirit to stay.

(He doesn't.)

The spirit's soul room collapses with a violet roar and the spirit clutches Ryou even tighter. Ryou buries his head into the spirit's chest and closes his eyes.

The spirit blows away, like sand on wind (maybe because Ryou was holding on to tight? Not tight enough?) and when Ryou opens his eyes again it is not the spirit's arm wrapped around him, it is Jounouchi's.

And then time passes.

* * *

A/N Yeah. I know. First off, I know I told you in my response to your reviews thank you for the quotes but seriously THANK YOU FOR THE QUOTES! Part of the reason of why this chapter is so late is because I had so many cool quotes to chose from! I have plenty of inspiration now. On this chapter. I don't know guys, I just don't.

I hope you liked it though! =) Review!!!


	44. Gameplan

A/N Dialogue only, because I like dialogue only fics.

* * *

_Defeat the enemies strategy. ~ Sun Tzu _

* * *

"Surely you are smarter than that yadonushi."

"…"

"What's wrong? Scared?"

"I'm not, I'm **not** afraid of you."

"Ha! Really, my dear host? Then why are you shaking?"

"…"

"Perhaps because one of your useless efforts to get rid of me has failed once again. Didn't I already tell you that I shall be with you _forever_? It's pathetic, really. As all your attempts against me. You'll never win. Yet you continue to fight me, why?"

"…

I don't care if I win. I just want to make sure you _lose_."

* * *

A/N Yeah, I know this chapter is ridiculously short for being so late, but you can blame ffnet for that. I wrote this two days ago and ffnet wouldn't let me post it. =/

Review, please?


	45. Uncertainty

* * *

_Doubt can be a bond as powerful and sustaining as certainty. ~ Father Flynn, Doubt_

* * *

The sky is black.

For once Ryou is not sure if that is his or the spirit's doing. That thought frightens more than anything else, more than thought of being a slave forever, more than thought of Yuugi dying. If those things were to happen, no one would blame him – not wholly at least. Most of their hate would be directed onto the spirit and in turn he would receive some compassion. Because poor Ryou had no chance against something as strong and dark like the spirit of the ring, because Ryou was innocent and unstained and there was never any blood on his hands –

He used to be certain of that fact. There was the evil spirit of the ring and there was him, innocent Ryou Bakura. (Different, _separate_.) But now, when he looks down at his hands it doesn't seem to matter that the blood on them was spilled when he wasn't in control.

So when he looks up at the black sky, he is unsure of whose darkness caused it.

But, nevertheless, it is familiar.

The sky is black, the screaming of the villagers is loud and horrendous, the sand beneath his feet is cold (there was no sun here, wherever here was), the rubble of a village long ago destroyed is buried in the sand, and there is a breeze that is gentle but strong enough to reshape the sand dunes around him.

And of course there is the blood.

Most of it is coated onto the remnants of pots and vases, like paint. Some of it is mixed with the sand at his feet. And a tiny, minuscule amount is smeared on his hands. Ryou raises his hand to his face, and despite the fact that there is no light (except for an eternal fire burning ninety nine souls in the far off distance) he can see his hand perfectly.

(There is more blood on it this time around.)

Ryou walks inside the footprints he left from the last time he was here. This too frightens him. He, however small it may be, has left his mark on the spirit. (He doesn't want any part of him to be with the spirit.)The trail twists and turns around the chucks of huts and burnt remains of Kul Elna. He wonders if this was the same path the spirit took when he was on the run from the Pharaoh's guards –

_No_.

He would feel no sympathy. The spirit made his own decisions, and the tragedy in his life did not excuse his actions. The spirit was cruel, conniving and wicked – and he was not, _not_, a scared little child in need of rescuing. The spirit was something malevolent and irredeemable (even though he had always been taught forgiveness and there always was a little good in someone, the spirit was the exception) – always the exception… And no! He could not allow himself doubt. It was a privilege he did not have. If there was even a shred of doubt, a tiny seed buried deep inside his heart the spirit would find it and use it against him.

The spirit had taken everything from Ryou – his friends, his body, he could not allow him to take his sympathies.

So Ryou, unfaltering and standing as straight as a liar like him can manage presses on through the deserted town. Another gust of winds blows past him and more of the ruins of the ancient village emerge through the sand. Clothes, some jewelry (all of course, soaked in blood) a few small clay pots. No skeletons though. Never. It was if all the residents of this place had just vanished one day, as if the wind had just blown them away like the sand around them.

(He knows better of course, but he needs to pretend. For the sake of his certainty.)

Ryou kicks the sand away and looks up into the dark, starless sky. He supposes he is as ready (and as sure) as he'll ever be.

"I know you're there!" he calls out to the sky.

_You're always there._ But that goes without saying.

To most it was seem as if nothing had happened. Not to Ryou. His eyes are trained for the subtleties, it is his ability to notice the subtleties that keeps him sane. The dark sky pulses a bit and for a split second the endless screaming of Kul Elna pauses.

Ryou's body, by instinct, tenses.

"Hello yadonushi."

Ryou doesn't respond. It's impolite not to respond to someone when they address you. He knows this; and by disregarding the spirit it fills his heart with something that diminishes his fear. Subtleties, small rebellions. Anything to keep him sane.

(He's not sure how much more of this he can take, he needs even small victories.)

The spirit chuckles slightly, because he knows Ryou so well; inside and out. Ryou's fist clenches in another one of his small rebellion; there is nothing he hates more in the world than that laugh.

He walks in front of Ryou, this time taking his distorted form of Ryou's body. Last time it was the form of a thief, the spirit's forms are the only thing in these meetings that changes for certain. The spirit stares at Ryou (looks down on him) and Ryou can feel himself cringing away.

"Why did you bring me here?" He asks, because the silence is killing him, "_Again_."

Another small laugh.

"You really should be more polite, my dear host – I am letting you into my very soul, it is the least you can do."

"You don't have a soul." he tries to say the words as if they were simple fact, but Ryou's voice wavers at the end and his doubt is revealed.

He is certain that this is not the spirit's soul room, though. It is not complex enough, not fitting enough for the vastness of the spirit. Perhaps it could be a memory, but to Ryou it has always reminded him of one of his RPG sets. Everything was too perfectly in place to be real.

"Perhaps I don't," the spirit seems more amused than thoughtful, "But I did once."

He takes a step towards Ryou, but Ryou stands his ground. Firm, he needs to be firm. No doubt, only certainty.

The spirit looks at Ryou with mild disgust. "So did you."

He pretends he doesn't know what that means.

(But he is, of course, just pretending.)

With courage born out of a flash of insanity or a lifetime of fear, Ryou looks directly at the spirit.

"You didn't answer my question," he accuses and he holds the spirit's cold gaze for at least a whole second. Longer than he ever has before.

When Ryou breaks the intense stare, the spirit throws his head back and laughs.

"I brought you here to show what happened – the truth."

The spirit tugs a clay pot from out of the sand and thrusts it into Ryou's arm. Ryou looks down on it with repugnance. He already knows what happened here. He had seen it, many, many times. When he closes his eyes the images are burned to the back of his eyelids.

The spirit leans in closer to Ryou, their noses almost touch.

"I brought you here to grant your wish, yadonushi. If you would cease with your pointless resistance – you have always and will always belong to me – and help me, I would in turn help you."

He pries Ryou's chin up with his finger and Ryou refuses to look the spirit in the eyes. Not because he knows it's rude (and it would be another small rebellion), but because he is sure his resolve will collapse if he looks into the spirit's eyes and sees that he is being honest.

"Now tell me, what is that you want?"

Ryou yanks his chin away from the spirit hands and retreats back several steps. He can't, he can't trust the spirit – all of this could easily be staged, be a _lie_, something to make Ryou believe him and turn against Yuugi. No! He would not be swayed!

"I just want you to go away!" he yells and his voice sounds as cracked and sore as if he has been crying for hours, "I want to be alone!"

The spirit smirks.

"Liar."

A breeze descends unto them now, and the spirit blows away into the darkness.

Ryou stares, confounded and turns around searching for where the spirit went too. He doesn't want to be left alone again with the screaming.

"You think what I'm doing is wrong."

The voice of the spirit, echoing and booming across the desert hills, says. Ryou finds that fitting. The spirit was never more (will never be more) than a voice in the back of his head.

"But I'm right!" the spirit practically snarls, the sound rumbling around Ryou, "Perhaps one day you will finally understand that. All I want is _justice_ for my village."

The voice changes, a soft whisper by Ryou's ear. He can almost feel the other's breath on his neck.

"Will you not grant me that much, yadonushi?"

The pot turns to ashes in his hands and blows away.

Laughter erupts from the sky like thunder and the sand rises slowly from the deserts floor. A flash of lightning follows (all while being engulfed by that horrendous laughter) and the sand swirls around him, encaging him, _consuming_ him("You'll always be mine, yadonushi, forever.") faster and faster it spins around him. The world blurs and Ryou feels the oxygen being sucked out of him; he closes his eyes and hopes that he will not die crying.

He takes in a deep breath and opens his eyes to find himself staring at familiar (and hated, oh so hated) picture frames. Trembling, he sucks in another breath and another, savoring each gulp of oxygen even if he technically has no body, he needs air. Ryou runs his fingers through his hair and plenty of sand falls to the floor of his soul room.

It stays there with the rest of the sand accumulated from whatever that place was. He can barely see his floor anymore.

(This hurts him more than it should.)

Ryou pulls his knees close to his chest and waits for a second attack. There never is and for that he is thankful. He knows if there ever was he would break completely, shatter beyond repair.

Maybe he already has.

Lifetimes tick away and everything remains unchanged. Especially Ryou, he does not move in fear of disturbing the spirit, in fear of the spirit acknowledging him again. Only when he feels a sharp pang in his chest, the pang that always comes when Yuugi is around, is he sure the spirit is preoccupied. Positive there is nothing with him in his room but dust and picture frames, he crawls into a small corner of his soul room.

Still shaking, he stares at his unstained hands until he regains his certainty.

* * *

A/N Formatting is being a little weird, so I apologize for any eyesores. As you've probably noticed updates have not been as frequent, will my summer vaction is ending in a couple of days and I'm starting a brand new school so they will be probably be even more infrequent. But I assure you that I will update at least once a week, always.

Hoped you enjoyed the chapter and please _review_!


	46. Always With You

* * *

_To live in hearts we leave behind/Is not to die. ~ Thomas Campell_

* * *

"Why aren't you more excited, Ryou! You're starting _school_." Amane demanded, "If I was you I'd be excited."

Ryou looked away. He already knew Amane would be excited, because Amane was brave and outgoing and made friends so easily.

(Everything Ryou was not.)

After seeing the hurt spread across Ryou's face and the way he seemed to close off his body, Amane knelt down besides her brother. She took his hand and squeezed it tightly.

"Why aren't you more excited?"

Ryou (again) found himself dodging her concerned and questioning stare.

"Tell me!" She said and lightly slapped him on the arm. Ryou whimpered softly and rubbed his arm but when he looked towards his sister, he saw genuine worry in her eyes.

"I don't want to go by myself," he admitted, "I'll be all alone."

Amane frowned but then her bright emerald eyes shimmered and she jabbed him in his heart.

"But you won't be alone 'cuz I'll always be with you big brother."

(And Ryou smiled, because in the place where Amane's finger had poked him, he knew that was the truth.)

* * *

A/N I just want to thank you guys again for reviewing. I'm sure you all know by now I responded to all my reviews, but I just want to give another thanks.

So please review again!


	47. In The Shadows of The Past

The day starts out simple enough.

He is making preparations for the Ishtar's visit. Ryou spent all of the sun's hours in the museum making arrangements for the return of the Pharaoh's tablet. Ishizu had been so gracious to allow the Domino Museum to have it on exhibit yet again. She was flying in from Egypt tomorrow, along with Rishid. And Malik. Ryou had been especially happy to hear that Malik would be coming too (usually he was off on some far end of the world, occasionally Rishid would be with him) and now he spends the moonlight hours going grocery shopping. Just in case Malik wants to come over, he would have food.

Malik. It would be good seeing him again, it had been almost four years. They had kept in contact through letters but that wasn't the same as Malik exactly being there. But now, now Ryou could show Malik the ocean just like he promised.

Despite all the past they shared, Ryou and Malik had formed a sort of odd friendship during Ryou's short time in Egypt. Malik was abrasive to say the least; most of his time he spent being arrogant and vain. He was also sort of spoiled. But that behavior didn't bother Ryou. Amane had been a bit spoiled and full of herself too.

(Maybe that's why Malik calls him Ryou.)

He crosses the street and now is on a stretch of pavement that is only dimly lit by flickering streetlamps.

And that's when he feels it.

Thick, shadowy smog wraps itself around him, like a suffocating blanket. He chokes and remembers the feeling of ring tassels piercing his skin, remembers falling out of control, remembers _laughter_ – . Ryou sputters and clutches onto his bags to keep them from dropping while the smog wraps itself tighter, tighter, tighter –

The lights around him go out.

**Darkness.**

(The darkness, his darkness, his shadow, his past…)

The bags drop out of his hands and their contents spill out onto the sidewalk.

Ryou runs all the way home.

-0-

When he awakes the next morning, he assures himself it was nothing.

The light bulbs all just burned out at the same time and it was such a weird coincidence that it freaked him out so bad he imagined things. Remembered things.

(Ryou traces over his chest and, thankfully, finds scars instead of a ring.)

After he gets dressed he locks all the doors and windows. Just in case. (Though, if it was**…**it probably wouldn't help anyway.)

He ignores the feeling of being watch as he walks down the street and walks towards the ocean.

Malik will be there.

-0-

"You feel it too." It is not a question.

Ryou shakes his head.

"Not _it_," he says, "**him**."

"I feel _it_," Malik insists, "They know I feel it too – Ishizu and Rishid. They don't think I can control it, they don't believe in me. Do you, Ryou? Do you?"

The waves rise and then fall only to rise again. A constant battle, one without a victory. Was that the fate he was doomed to else well? Constant fighting with a darkness his light couldn't even hope to extinguish?

"No."

Malik recoils, anger carved into his features. Ryou regards him with polite disinterest.

"If it makes you feel any better, I don't believe in me either."

The burning in Malik's lilac eyes dim, and then the ghost of a bitter laugh appears on his face.

"You sound scared," Malik mocks.

Ryou pulls his knees to his chest.

"Last night, I felt something. Like **he** was watching me. I look out into the darkness and it felt like **he was** looking back at me. Just waiting in the shadows. I'm…afraid."

"Of what? Him or the darkness?" Malik scrutinizes.

Ryou tilts his head, puzzled, "They're the same thing."

"Ah." There is a degree of understanding in the Malik's voice which (like the waves against the shore) calms Ryou a bit.

And together they watch the ocean.

-0-

The phone rings.

Ryou, hasty as always, answers it.

"Hello?" he says.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi shouts from the other end, it almost sounds like he is crying, "He's back! You'll never believe this! _I_ don't believe this. But Atemu is here! He's back!"

Yuugi says some more, but Ryou never hears it.

The phone receiver had long ago dropped out of his hands.

-0-

"It's only a matter of time."

"What is?" Ryou asks as the ocean waves crash against the shore.

"What do you think?" Malik snarls and his hands tremble.

"Oh." Ryou whispers softly and looks down at the distorted reflection the water makes.

(It stares back at him.)

There is even more silence, though there are plenty of words that need to be said – just none that want too.

Again, it is Malik who has the courage to speak.

"Have you gone to see the Pharaoh yet?"

"No," Ryou says and his voice betrays his shame.

"Neither have I," Malik snorts under his breath, "Ishizu and Rishid have but I guess – I guess seeing him would make it _real_. It's not just a bad dream anymore, Ryou."

His arrogant façade fades and Malik collapses into his hands.

Ryou stares. Then he wraps his arms around Malik's shoulders.

He does his best to give comfort when no comfort can be given.

-0-

There's a knock at his door.

Instantly, Ryou has to sooth his raging nerves. It's not **him**. It couldn't be.

**He** wouldn't knock.

Despite his desperate attempts to calm himself, his hearts still pounds of his chest as if it were trying to escape. Against all of his instincts, Ryou opens the door.

Yuugi is standing behind it, smiling warm and bright. Ryou almost cries from relief.

"Yuugi-kun!" He grins, "Come in."

"Hi, Bakura-kun. It's been such a long time since I saw you. Sorry! Everything has just been so chaotic since Yami just appeared…"

"It's fine, it's fine." (_You're here now._) "Do you want something to drink?"

"Oh, no. Actually I wanted to talk to you, Bakura."

Ryou freezes, sensing something in Yuugi's voice. "About what, Yuugi?"

"Well um…Yam- Atemu thinks that…_your other_…came back too."

"He does?" Ryou asks voice thick with feigned naivety and hidden fear.

Yuugi nods and begins to itch his wrist; a habit he only does when he's nervous.

"Atemu thinks that he'll try to find you…if he hasn't already."

Ryou's eyebrow twitches.

"Hasn't already?" his voice is no longer so innocence, "What does that mean?"

"Well –," Yuugi is taken aback by Ryou's tone, "Atemu thinks that maybe, well maybe you too had a connection…"

"I _hate_ him!" Ryou gapes, he couldn't believe his ears. The spirit of the ring tortured him, _tortures_ him. "And what would he ever want from me?"

"Well, Atemu just thinks that maybe he tried to convince you of some things, that maybe you and him –"

"What? That we're working together? His not my friend…he never was. Yuugi! Why would I ever…?"

Yuugi takes a few steps back, almost afraid. Ryou was always so posed and serene – never frantic.

"It's just what Atemu thinks…"

"I don't care what the Pharaoh thinks!" He snaps and then his voice loses its bitterness. "_Yuugi_. I care what _you_ think."

"I-ii- I," Yuugi stutters, too caught off guard to lie. Ryou turns away in disgust.

"I get it."

"No Bakura-kun is not that! It's just –"

"You can go now, Yuugi."

Ryou waits for another protest, but there is none.

(_I just need you to mean it when you say you believe in me, Yuugi._)

"Alright," Yuugi says, defeated. Bile rises up in the back of Ryou's throat.

"And he hasn't by the way. Hasn't talked to me. Though I suppose," Ryou cringes, his back still turned to Yuugi, "It's only a matter of time."

(_"It's only a matter of time."_)

"I don't know what to do…" he admits.

"We'll protect you. You know that right Bakura? You know you're our friend. My friend."

Ryou shakes his head and resists the urge to laugh.

(_Oh Yuugi, you couldn't protect before. What makes you think you can now?_)

"No. I don't."

"Bakura-kun," Yuugi's voice trembles.

"Just go…please."

He does.

Some part of Ryou hopes Yuugi will be back again.

(He ignores that hope as best he can.)

-0-

"I'm leaving."

"I know. You always do."

Ryou was beginning to realize how freely he spoke when he was in Malik's company. (And the ocean's.) He liked it. It was nice not to have to hide parts of himself, nice not to lie.

"Ha. Ha. Insulting me won't make me stay." Malik scoffs.

"I wasn't insulting you!" Ryou sounds honestly offended. "It's just the truth."

Malik rolls his eyes but sits down besides Ryou anyways. There is silence between, but it is peaceful.

"You could come with me," Malik whispers, so suddenly and softy Ryou almost misses it.

"No, I couldn't. My job's here, my home's here…"

(…_Yuugi's here._)

"Quit, move. I know you're not _that_ dumb."

"Why?" Ryou turns to Malik with wide, sad brown eyes.

"You know it's only a matter of time until **he** finds you if you stay," Malik says with a hint of a threat.

Ryou looks away, "**He** found me a long time ago."

Something sarcastic is on the tip of Malik's tongue, Ryou can tell just by his expression, but thankfully he says nothing.

The waves crash against the rocky beach, so the silence is not so empty.

"You know, I love the ocean. I always have," Ryou speaks to the waves, "When I was young my mother would take me and my sister to the Atlantic Ocean. My sister would always want to go swimming, but my mother and I would just sit and watch the waves. It was so soothing. My mother would tell me things about the ocean. 'The ocean grants you calm.' 'The ocean always brings what is lost back to you.' 'The ocean gives you strength.' I understand what she meant now."

"What are you talking about?" Malik sneers.

"I think…I think I'm going to stay."

(_I'm not going to run anymore._)

Malik's face widens in shock and then he glares.

Ryou smiles at him, (gently, serenely, calmly) anyway.

"I'll always be here for you, Malik you're my best friend."

And if that's not the truth, it is at least the truest thing he has ever spoken.

Malik's face softens then, too.

"Good luck, Ryou." He means it.

"Goodbye Malik. I'll miss you."

He's not sure if Malik even heard him, because the Egyptian is already getting on his motorcycle and starting his engine. Ryou watches him go.

(It is always the same.)

Malik takes off on his motorcycle, bolting as far away as he can – from everything.

Even though so much time had passed, so much had stayed the same. Malik will always run and run, but he'll never get away. And Ryou will always hide, will always have to be shielded and protected, and Ryou will always be afraid.

Not anymore.

He is sick of the past. He (wants, deserves) _needs_ a future. He won't run anymore.

So Ryou stays put (losing himself in the waves), waiting…just waiting for the inevitable. Whatever the inevitable may be.

Anyway, even if he wanted to run, he couldn't.

("_It's only a matter of time…_")

You can't run from your shadow.

A/N I know. The ending, I wanted it to be ambigious but...who knows. I hope you enjoyed it! I wrote this as a kind of what if scenerio. What if the Yami no Bakura and Malik were given bodies...but no humanity? And only one day late! School is hard. So hard.

Reviews are loved!


	48. Birthday Surprises

* * *

_The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet. ~ Robert Orben_

* * *

_Go away, goaway, **go** **away**!_

_"Don't be so rude, yadonushi. All I want to do is wish you a happy birthday." _

_Laughter – dark, twisting, filled to brim with insanity – engulfed his mind and he couldn't hear anything but that **voice**…_

There was a knock at the door and it brought Ryou out of the darkness of his mind.

Ryou rushed to answer it, not out of the need to be polite, but the need to get away from that **voice**. He opened it almost frantically and there it front of him stood a boy with a golden puzzle.

(**_Yuugi._**)

"Yuugi-kun! What are you doing here?" (_You shouldn't be here, remember what happened last time you were here?)_

Smiling, the shorter boy stuck out a brightly wrapped gift.

"Happy Birthday Bakura-kun!"

Ryou took a step back.

"You remembered my birthday?" His voice quivered.

"Of course I did. You're my friend, Bakura. How could I not?"

Ryou felt his whole body tingle with an unfamiliar feeling. Happiness?

"Sorry I don't have time to hang out; Grandpa needs me at the shop. But maybe tomorrow we could have a belated birthday party?"

Yuugi looked up doubtfully at Ryou. The snowy haired boy in question gaped at Yuugi with eyes the sizes of dinner plates.

"Bakura-kun?" Yuugi asked worriedly, "Bakura-kun are you okay?"

He stared, and then for the first time in an eternity (like finally seeing the dawn after an endless night) Ryou smiled.

And he knew it was just the beginning of many good birthdays to come.

* * *

A/N Happy (late) Birthday Ryou!

As always, reviews are loved!


	49. Aftershocks

Dedicated to Bluefox of the Moon, as requested!

Underline = strike through, like crossing out something when you're writing in pen.

* * *

_You're not alone/There's more to this I know/You can make it out/You will live to tell ~ You're Not Alone, Saosin_

* * *

The sun is rising.

(Ryou watches with a sense of hate; it will only set and leave him again.)

-0-

The sun is rising as the plane approaches Domino.

(Some part of Ryou knows it's mocking him.)

Yuugi is happy. The spirit is gone. The spirit is gone, the spirit is gone (that's all he hears in his head now – instead of laughter – the rumbling of gone, of alone.)

Alone.

(When they arrive at the airport, Ryou breaks away from…his friends?... and loses himself in the crowd.)

His chest hurts; there is no ring.

-0-

Ryou is not entirely sure if he likes Malik, but for whatever reason Malik likes him. He keeps calling at the darkest hours of the night with no explanation.

That's okay.

It's nice that Ryou doesn't like him (he's too arrogant and analytical; far too much like the spirit), it's nice to talk to someone and not worry about being good enough for them.

(Like Yuugi.)

He hasn't talked to Yuugi in a week. Ryou wonders if he'll ever.

-0-

He cried today.

(For the first time since Amane died.)

He couldn't stop.

-0-

Beep.

"Hey Bakura-kun! I haven't seen you at school lately – have you even come? Maybe you're sick, is that why you're not answering your phone? Or am I just missing you? (_laughter_) I've been kind of forgetful lately. Things have been so hectic you know? Well of course you know, because of well…yeah. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring that up I swear! I just called because me, Jou, Anzu, and Honda are going to the arcade in a hour or so…and I haven't seen you since…well, you know… just come okay? It'll be fun I promise. Unless you're sick, but if you are call back okay? I just want to hear your voice Bakura-kun. I miss you. You know I'm always here for you, if you need to talk. You can talk to me anytime; I just need you to know that. I'm your friend. Are you there? If you're there please pick up!"

…

"Okay, if you don't want to talk I understand…but Bakura, I kind want to talk to you. It's just; I don't think anyone else will understand. It needs to be you, Bakura-kun. Please pick up if your there. _Please_."

…

"Well…I guess you're not home. Hopefully you'll get this and come to the arcade with us? Honda and Anzu are worried about you. I'm sorta worried about you too… Anyway, just come meet us at the arcade, okay? Sorry for such a rambling message! It's just…I just need to talk to you. Call me back, even if you don't come. _Especially_ if you don't come.

Bye. I miss you."

-0-

Ryou gets Yuugi's message three days later.

(He still doesn't call.)

-0-

He has his first nightmare that night.

Ryou dreams the darkness was slithering around him, spinning and wrapping itself around him like a cocoon. It tightens around him and digs into his skin (like tassels of the millennium ring). He fights and he screams until he finally breaks out.

He looks into a mirror and doesn't see his reflection.

Ryou sees his other's.

-0-

"You sound like hell."

Ryou coughs hard into the receiver, as if to prove Malik's point.

"Ra, Ryou what happened to you?"

"I'm sick," Ryou says in a nasally voice.

"Obviously. I'd meant why haven't you been answering your phone?"

"I've been…tired," Ryou lies.

"You're lying." Malik says simply, almost bored. "What's the real reason?"

Nothing gets past Malik. Ryou has learned this by now. And something about him makes Ryou feel comfortable, like he could spill all off his secrets and Malik wouldn't even bat an eye. (Not like Yuugi.) Malik didn't needed to be shielded from darkness, wasn't afraid of it. He wouldn't think less of Ryou if Ryou told him the truth.

So that's why Ryou is honest with him.

"I haven't answered the phone because I'm afraid you might be someone else. I don't have caller ID and I really don't…" Ryou trails off.

"Don't want?" Malik pushes for an answer.

There are no secrets from Malik.

"I don't want to talk to you or Yuugi."

Silence. Then, finally, a laugh.

"Well even if you didn't want to talk to me – which I know you do by the way, you're not that good of a liar – you'd still listen to me because that's what you do Ryou. You're polite."

Ryou (who really isn't that good of a liar) cannot disagree.

So he says nothing.

(He listens though.)

-0-

Dear Amane,

Everything is going great! Things are getting better.

Nothing's changed. I can't remember the last time I slept, and when I close my eyes all is see is that darkness… Yuugi keeps calling. It's strange, I want to talk to him so bad…he was the only friend I had (I never deserved him, did I?)…but when I try to pick up the phone and say something to him my throat closes up, my lips won't move. I can't speak. The same thing happened when you first Even though…even though Koe the spirit of the ring he it's gone, I'm still not in control. I'm a marionette with broken strings, lying on the stage with no purpose.

I think I miss I'm empty. I've been trying to catch up on my schoolwork, Mother would have wanted that, but none of it means anything. It's all just black on white. I'm trying though; we graduate in a couple of weeks. I can't believe school is almost finished. I can't really even remember the last two years of my life. Is that why the world seems so grey? Before when you were here it was so bright, so colorful. Everything's changed.

Malik's coming to Domino soon, probably before graduation from what he tells me. He's always most excited when he talks about leaving Egypt. Maybe I should leave too. Maybe I'll go home.

I need you here, I don't think I can I miss you I love you

Yours always,

Ryou

-0-

"Yuugi." He forces the word out of his throat.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi shouts, stunned. "I'm so happy to see you! What happened?"

"I've been ill," Ryou looks away, he can't even tell that half-lie.

"Oh, that's too bad," Yuugi's face looks absolutely elated though, "But I'm glad because for a second there I thought you were avoiding me...!"

Yuugi smiles.

(Ryou can't.)

"No, just haven't felt too good…"

"Well, we all are meeting up at the Game Shop after school; you want to meet us there?"

(_No, I don't ever what to go anyone with any of you again._)

"I can't," a weak, forced smile – more of a lie than anything he has ever done in the past, "I have a lot of homework to catch-up on."

"Oh." Yuugi looks to the ground, "Maybe next time?"

"Maybe."

(Ryou walks away without a second word.)

-0-

"What am I to you?" Ryou blurts out, the words almost vomiting out from him.

There is silence on the other line.

"What kind of question is that?" Malik sneers.

(An honest one.)

"I'm just wondering…" he trails off and hugs his feet to his chest.

(_Please, just tell them I'm more than a tool, a vessel; tell me that I'm more than an innocent face, more than someone to save. Please just – _)

"Tell me I'm your friend."

"You're my friend." Malik says this the way one would read a shopping list.

Ryou allows a tingling, warm sensation to run through his body. The ghost of a smile he once had appears on his face.

"Now where was I before just rudely cut me off – ?"

-0-

"Bakura-kun! Bakura-kun!"

Ryou walks faster, pushing his way through a crowd of his peers.

"Bakura, Bakura wait! Please just talk to me!"

His walk becomes a run.

-0-

"I'm coming to Domino next week; I already have my plane ticket."

"Do you have a place to stay?"

"Not yet, Ishizu still hasn't –

"You could stay with me! … If you _want_…"

"Yeah, alright."

-0-

He's making extreme preparations for Malik's visit, including a deep cleaning. It's during one of theses that he first discovers (rediscovers, actually) where he hid all his mirrors. There crowded in the farthest corner of his closest, covered in a thin layer of dust (like the way dust gathered on his soul room walls…)

The teenager, still just a teenager, though he's been through lifetimes of suffering, brushes the dust off and hangs the mirror on the wall.

Ryou stares at his eyes for hours, looking for hints of red.

-0-

During another one of his cleaning missions, he finds the dice that used to go with his Monster World game.

They feel heavy in his hands; the weight of all his sins.

(In the back of his mind he hears laughter.)

-0-

"Hello, is this Yuugi," he pauses and then decides to go through with it, "-kun?"

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi is always so happy to hear him, it's almost sickening.

(He doesn't deserve that kind of forgiveness. And maybe he doesn't want it either.)

"How have you been?" Ryou says sincerely and hopes for a sincere answer.

He wants to be Yuugi friend, not because Yuugi was the holder of the millennium puzzle but because Yuugi wants to be Ryou's friend too.

"Better. I've been better."

Then, Yuugi confesses everything.

-0-

"Hmm," Malik says at the first sight of Ryou, "I remember you being a lot taller."

Ryou's so excited he's not even offended.

-0-

"Everyone lies, Ryou; everyone pretends. Even Yuugi is trying to be someone he's not. He's not the Pharaoh, no matter how much he wants to be."

Malik lets out a humorlessly laugh. (Ryou doesn't find anything about his situation funny.)

"Even I lie to you – I'm not what you think I am. I don't even think I'm what I think I am."

Ryou cringes.

"Oh don't act so naïve. You already knew people are liars."

"I just want to believe, Malik." Ryou's voice cracks.

"Believe what?"

(_In the truth, in good, in Yuugi, in you..._)

"Believe in me."

Malik's frowns, like doesn't understand (or, much more likely doesn't want too.)

For the first time in their entire conversation, Ryou looks at Malik directly in his eyes.

"I don't know how anymore, Malik. I try and I try but when I look at myself…I…I…I can't. What should I do? What can I do?" Ryou's throat is raw, not from holding back tears, but from finally telling such a broken truth.

Malik's face relaxes and he closes his eyes. Then chuckles.

"First, you have to know who you are. Know that you're a liar – we all are. It's only natural."

Ryou looks far into the ocean and tries out those three small words.

("I'm a liar.")

"Now, why are you lying? Who are you trying to be, Ryou?"

Malik leans in close; maybe he's hoping that Ryou can answer for the both of them.

Ryou stares into the water, a distorted reflection greets him. Then, honestly, he answers.

"I don't know."

-0-

He knows who he's trying to be now.

He decides it right then as Malik took off onto another plane God knows where.

He is trying to be Ryou Bakura. Brother of Amane Bakura, a high school graduated, hopefully college-bound, lover of cream-puffs and role playing games.

(And he is not a host, or the light side of someone else's soul.)

He is a human being.

-0-

Yuugi rolls the dice and moves his figurine ten spaces.

(He's winning, of course.)

It's nice, whatever they are now and Ryou does his best not ruin it. Everything hard is over now; he has ridden through all through all the aftershocks. And he is still here. But some part of him still knows how unfair it is, Yuugi confessed. Should he not?

"It hurts, sometimes when I think about it. Sometimes I think I miss him." Ryou says abruptly. It's the truth, but a dark truth and usually Ryou's tries with all his might to shield Yuugi from the dark.

Yuugi's eyes swell and he gives Ryou a weak smile.

"Bakura-kun," he coos and Ryou turns his head, ashamed. He shouldn't feel this way, (and yet –)

"That's okay."

-0-

The sun is setting.

(But Ryou knows tomorrow it will rise again.)

* * *

A/N Late chapter is two days late and not even worth it. I'm soooo sorry! Please forgive me.


	50. Remnants of a Memory

A/N Post-series.

* * *

_This kind of forgetting does not erase memory, it lays the emotion surround the memory to rest. ~ Clarissa Pinkola Estes_

* * *

It's the simple days like this.

With grocery bags in hands, Ryou takes a small detour through the park. He loves autumn, how the leaves to magnificence shades of colors previously thought to be impossible of them. (Perhaps, too he likes the fact that they fall.)

A particular strong gust of wind howls through the park… the trees…. his hair. It ruffles the leaves causing them to crinkle together.

Ryou freezes.

(It sounds as if someone is calling his name.)

The wind dies down, the leaves settle and he regains his posture.

(And then there is nothing.)

* * *

A/N Holy crap guys. Fifty chapters. It's almost as unbelievable as the fact last chapter got eleven reviews. Eleven reviews! I am so amazed and thankfully to all of you, every single person who reads this story. So I'm going to ask you something special. I would really appreciate if _everyone_ who has read this far to tell me your top five favorite chapters. They don't have to be listed in order, just five you really liked. And a reason, of course.

So thank you all again, and review!


	51. The Power of Friendship

A/N Format.

* * *

_The only thing that's going to bother me/Is that you'll all call yourselves my friends/Why can't you look me in the eyes one last time? ~ You Should Have Killed Me When You Had The Chance, A Day to Remember._

* * *

He waits for the question.

It comes, everyday without fail. Ryou hates it. More than the scars on his chest, more than the fake smiles he sees when he sits down to eat his lunch. Nothing compares to that question.

"How about you Bakura?" Honda asks, "How have you been?"

(Angry, depressed, ecstatic, insane, lonely…)

"Good. I'm fine."

-0-

Ryou doesn't remember buying the coat, or wearing it. No, all he remembers is waking up in. Remembers falling back into himself, falling on stairs, falling into the arms of Jounouchi…

It's black and Ryou thinks it is very suiting of the spirit. Dark and cold with lots of hidden pockets.

(He strokes the fabric almost longingly.)

In the pockets, he finds a knife. (There is still some dried blood coated on it.) When he takes the knife into his hands, a sharp buzz travels up his arms. Each nerve, each atom of his hand awakens and suddenly his own arm does not seem like part of him. It feels separate.

(Separate…)

He keeps the knife with him at all times from that moment on.

-0-

The walk to school is pleasant, in an annoying sort of way.

Usually, Hondo and Jou will say something that doesn't sit well with Anzu and then Anzu and Jou will have to bicker back and forth until they reach Domino High. It's predictable and boring but it's better than being alone.

(And he is so alone now…so alone…)

"Hey guys!" Yuugi says, in a usual way, "Where's Honda?"

They look around (even Ryou) and finally realize Honda's absence.

"I haven't seen him," Jou proclaims and Anzu shakes her head in agreement.

Yuugi frowns.

"Bakura-kun, you haven't see Honda have you?"

Ryou blinks and then shakes his head.

"Me? No I haven't seen him, Yuugi. Sorry."

(It's just one little lie…)

He smiles at Yuugi, and then slowly Yuugi smiles back.

"Probably just got sick…he'll be here tomorrow for sure!"

Yuugi runs up back to the front of the group where Jou and Anzu have started their same argument yet again.

Ryou falls behind a bit and watches.

-0-

He's glad he packed himself a little thermos of tea, the day has been stressful.

(It's good thing both Jou and Honda are gone today.)

Ryou is quiet as always, but today Yuugi is too.

"What's wrong Yuugi?" Anzu asks, speaking Ryou's own concerns.

Yuugi frowns and suddenly he looks very tired.

"Honda's not answering my calls and neither is Jou," he sighs, "I'm worried about them. Why haven't they called?"

Anzu's eyes glimmer a bit, and Ryou knows she feels the same. But for the sake of Yuugi (always for the sake of Yuugi) Ryou can predict what she'll do next.

"I'm sure everything is fine Yuugi! You know them, they'll probably just doing something stupid," she laughs uneasily. Even Yuugi can barely smile back.

Ryou just takes another sip of his tea.

-0-

Ryou finds it funny. No matter how many times he holds his knife, it never loses its buzz.

(The blood never really washes out either, but that's another matter entirely.)

-0-

The first words out of Yuugi's mouth are:

"Where's Anzu?"

Ryou looks up, quite perplexed. He glances side to side then back at Yuugi.

"I guess she's absent."

Yuugi's eyes harden.

"She walked to school with us – she was perfectly fine this morning!"

Ryou shrugs. It's not as though any of this pertains to him.

"Perhaps she got sick and had to go home." That sounded plausible enough.

"She would have told me!" And suddenly it is very clear that Yuugi is vastly different than Pharaoh. The Pharaoh would not have sounded so weak and pathetic.

"I don't know, Yuugi-kun. I haven't seen her. "

Yuugi looks as if tears will burst from his violet eyes any second.

"Maybe you should go the nurse," Ryou says caringly, friendly and all the other fake emotions, "You don't look so well."

Yuugi collapses next to Ryou.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you Bakura-kun…it's just… it seems like everyone is disappearing and I'm so worried all the time…"

Ryou smiles and takes Yuugi's hand in his.

"It's already Yuugi-kun. I'm sure everything will turn out okay."

Another smile, this time Yuugi returns it.

"I have something that will cheer you up!" Ryou declares and pulls something out his pocket.

"Come on Yuugi, how about we play a game?"

-0-

By the time Yuugi regains consciousness, Ryou is already half way done.

Gloves on. Check.

Bound and gagged. Check.

Fingertips cut. Check.

Everything is in place, so he takes his first real cut as Yuugi opens his eyes.

The boy screams of course.

"It's okay, Yuugi-kun," Ryou consoles.

Another mark and the buzz radiating from his knife intensifies to unparalleled levels.

"I've gotten better at it," he tells Yuugi as Yuugi sits dying.

"I have!" Ryou assures him when he receives no answer.

He takes his knife and slash more crimson is spilled.

"Honda had it the worst. I didn't know what I was doing then. But I'm better now!"

Ryou smiles at Yuugi. Then glares.

"But you don't believe me do you? Don't believe me, you never believed me! When he left – when you took him from me! – I saw the way you looked at me. Watched you watch me. You were just waiting for me to break. Even though I told you – I told you – I was better… And I was! I was – am, am better. Without him. I hated him. I'm not doing this for him. I'm not. But you probably don't believe that either. How can I call you my friend if you won't even trust me?!"

Yuugi makes some muffled noise, but it's hard to talk when your throat is slit.

"I didn't want to do this. I had too!" Ryou is shaking now, quivering so hard it's a miracle that his knife just doesn't slip right out of his hands.

"I had too." For once, he says this more to himself than Yuugi.

"You were all going to leave me eventually. You had already left in your minds. I could see it in your eyes. You hated me. Hate me. But now you can't ever leave."

(Yuugi lets out a moan.)

Ryou laughs; it is unhinged. He laughs and laughs until all of a sudden nothing is funny anymore.

"I'm so pathetic. I didn't even…I hated him. I don't want him back. I just…I didn't want him to leave! But this isn't about him! I..it's me…all I want… And you, Yuugi, all I ever wanted was to be you friend! That's all I wanted I swear!"

His frenzied eyes look to Yuugi's but they are glazed over.

All he wanted was friendship, everything he had ever done was in search of it.

"I just don't want to be alone!" He shouts and the part of his mind tells him how disgusting he sounds.

Then, a whimper.

"Is that so wrong, Yuugi-kun?"

Ryou waits for answer.

("Yuugi-kun?")

There never is one.

A/N I suck. Majorly. You guys are so awesome, especially you reviewers and I awarded with late, short, crappy updates. Forgive me?


	52. Jealousy

A/N Hinted at graceshipping. Up to you if anything really did happen. Separation timeline.

* * *

_The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves. ~ William Penn_

* * *

"Where's Ryou?" Malik hissed, so angry he couldn't even fully open his mouth.

"What do you want with yadonushi now, Malik?" Bakura's said half way between a sigh and a growl. He does not even stop polishing his knives.

"I'm going to kill him. I'm going to tear him apart limb from and limb and then melt the flesh off his bones with acid. Then lit him on fire."

Bakura stopped polishing.

And then snorted.

"Ryou – my Ryou? What could _he_ have possibly done to you?"

Malik's face contorted even more. "Not me, my sister."

Bakura raised an eyebrow, his way of asking Malik to elaborate.

"He's going out with Ishizu."

Bakura, again, snorted.

"No, he's not."

"Yes, he is!"

"Are you contradicting me? Me! You don't think I of all people would know who my reincarnation is dating?" Bakura sneered.

Malik glared. "I can't find him and I can't find Ishizu so obviously that means they're together."

"Brilliant logic, tomb keeper. He's not with her. I would know if he was."

"Oh really Great King of Thieves? Well where do you – you the all knowing – suppose he is now?"

Bakura's eyes narrowed and he opened his mouth to give a clever retort when suddenly it occurred to him that he, in fact, did not know.

Malik smirked as Bakura swore loudly.

"I told you," Malik leered.

Bakura stuffed his knife into his pocket.

"I'm going to _slaughter_ him..."

* * *

A/N Hooray, this chapter isn't late! This was actually really fun to write, Malik a protective little brother and Bakura all jealousy. Hopefully you enjoyed reading it!

Review please!


	53. To Be Loved and To Be Lost

A/N Holy Crap, guys. Just holy crap. Warnings: Vexshipping and Hostshipping. Subtextual Tendershipping. Could be considered a slight AU, because the timeline really makes no sense with canon, I'm thinking it differs a little bit before Duelist Kingdom - manga canon. Dedicated to Bakura's Guardian Angel who requested this quote and a romance.

* * *

_Why do we love when losing hurts so much? We love to know that we are not alone. ~ C.S. Lewis_

* * *

Anzu is so bored.

Yuugi wasn't answering her calls, Honda and Jou had landed themselves in the hospital after a particularly brutal fight, and Anzu was positive that she had never been more bored in her entire life than she was at this exact moment.

Even though she was out enjoying the beautiful summer day, she still wasn't having fun. Anzu had thought maybe going to the park would relieve her boredom but in fact it was doing quite the opposite. It was making it worst. Nature was beautiful but no fun if you didn't have anyone to enjoy it with.

She sighs loudly. She really needs her friends.

"What's wrong? Too much of girl to stand up for yourself?!"

Anzu's looks behind the bench she is sitting on, the rude obnoxious voice breaking her out of her pity party. The voice was loud and stupid – only fitting of that brute Ushio.

Anzu feels her anger rising, no one deserved to have put up with that beast.

"Please just leave me alone," says another voice, strained but still very polite. Anzu recognizes this one too…could it be Bakura? She hadn't seen him only once or twice since school had let out – actually, Anzu had just figured he had gone on some sort of vacation.

But obviously that wasn't the case. He was stuck here, being picked on by creeps like Ushio.

Well – not on her watch. No one messes with her friends.

She rises from her bench and dashes towards the voices. Finally she sees them behind a large tree, Bakura trying to read a book while Ushio was throwing insults at him. Bakura was grimacing; it was plain to see that while he was trying to ignore the ugly thug he wasn't succeeding. He was clenching his eyes shut a lot and each time he opened them it…it almost looked like they were changing shape.

Weird. Really weird.

"Hey!" Anzu shouts and places her hands on her hip. "Why don't you crawl back to that hole you live in and leave him alone?"

They both turn to look at her, both of them having the same expression of disbelief plastered over their faces.

"Anzu?" says Ryou quietly, like he was just awaking from a daze.

"Get lost girlie – this is none of your business!" Ushio barks.

Anzu rolls her eyes.

"Please. You couldn't scare a three year old, Ushio," she marches over to Bakura (who still has the glazed over look in his eyes) and hoists him up.

"Let's go," she whispers and the way Bakura hurriedly grabs his book she can tell he feels them way.

"Coward!" Ushio calls after them.

"Don't listen to him, Bakura," Anzu comforts, "He's just – "

"Bully?" Bakura finishes for her and then smiles slightly. "I know. All their insults sound the same after a while. It doesn't bother _me_."

He emphasizes the word 'me' as if there would be someone else.

Bakura faces her straight on now. Anzu never realized how brown his eyes were, they were so deep. Seemingly endless.

"Thank you, though, Anzu. I appreciate it." He gives her a wide smile, his eyes closing in the process. She feels a few butterflies flutter in the pit of her stomach.

"Um…are you doing anything right now?" She questions, hoping that he's not. "Because I don't have any place to go."

"No, I was just reading."

"Oh! What book?" Anzu takes the book from his hands and turns to the first page. On it, in elegant feminine handwriting there are four words.

_To Ryou with Love_

'Ryou', Anzu mouths to herself.

"Is that your first name?" Anzu turns to Bakura, "Ryou?"

Bakura looks up. "Oh, yeah, it is."

His smile is so soft and cute.

Ryou. Anzu really likes that sound of that. It fits him more than Bakura.

"Do you mind if I call you Ryou?" She asks, the butterflies coming back.

Ryou gives another small smile.

"Not at all."

-0-

"Hello, Anzu-chan," Ryou says a bit hesitantly as he sits down besides her. He shouldn't be so nervous; it had become such a routine to set on this same bench every Sunday since their first meeting. But today was special. Today was August 18, Anzu's birthday.

"Hey Ryou!" says Anzu happily, waving. "How have you been?"

"Good," he says with a slight smile. (That almost wasn't a lie either, he had been better. Anzu had made him better.) "And you? Are you having a happy birthday?"

Anzu paled a bit, "I've been worrying about my dance recital all day. Not even the birthday cake could cheer me up."

"You'll do fine, I'm sure of it."

Anzu's looks at him, so trusting and welcoming. It's more than Ryou ever dreamed of.

"Here," Ryou says as he rummages through his bag, "I got you something a present for you birthday."

Anzu's bright, beautiful blue eyes shine with excitement, "Really? You didn't have to do that."

"I wanted too." Ryou assures her and smiles. He gives a small black box.

"Sorry, I didn't have time to wrap it." Ryou laughs a bit uneasily, hopefully it doesn't matter. (All he really wants is to see Anzu smile…)

"No, no. It's fine!" She reassures, eagerly opening up the box. Anzu pulls out by a silver chain a beautiful necklace with a ballerina pendant. She gasps and Ryou smiles.

"I thought you could wear it doing your performance tonight," He blushes a bit and looks away, "You know, for good luck."

Anzu smile turns into a grin and she throws herself into his arms.

"I love it," she says.

(Ryou can't help but agree.)

-0-

It's a little later than usual, but Anzu is sure that Ryou will be there anyway. Ryou is very patient, she had been two hours late before and Ryou had still been there. He had just sat on their bench and waited.

Further ahead, in the distance, Anzu sees a figure with striking snowy white hair. Ryou. It's amazing how comfortable she was around him now. Maybe even more than Yuugi.

She runs up ahead to see him, excited to spill all of her secrets.

"Ryou!" Anzu calls. The white-haired boy turns around. He's dressed in black trench coat, and the millennium ring is hanging around his neck. He is standing with his shoulders back (so uncharacteristic of Ryou) and there is a half smirk plastered over his face.

"You're not Ryou," Anzu realizes and takes a step back.

Not Ryou's smirk widens.

"You're the spirit of the millennium ring…" Anzu trails off, remembering the Monster World game they had played long ago.

"I am," he says and takes a step forward, closer to her. Anzu's instincts tell her she should be afraid, after all the last time she saw them he tried to kill her and all her friends, but Anzu's not. She's just not.

So when he comes closer to her, she does not move.

"And your name is Anzu…correct?" His features or his version of Ryou's features are very predator like. Handsome, but…dark. "My host thinks about constantly."

That throws Anzu off…Ryou thinks about her? Why would he tell her that?

"You know my name, but I don't know yours." She raises her voices a little and stands up straighter. Anzu wants him to know she's not afraid.

The spirit cocks a brow. "You can call me Bakura."

Bakura? She had only just gotten use to calling Ryou, Ryou.

"Perhaps I'll see you again," Bakura purrs, "Anzu."

The way he says her name sends shivers down her spine.

But somehow Anzu hopes she sees him again soon.

-0-

They're sitting at their bench again. It's different than all the other times though. There is more tension. Do they talk to each other, Anzu wonders. Ryou and his other personality?

"I saw your other personality last week," she says finally.

Ryou sort of flinches away. "I know."

"Yeah, Bakura said…" she trails off, blushing. Anzu still can't believe that Ryou thinks about her. The way he reacted to his fan club always made Anzu assume he wasn't that interested in girls.

Ryou cocks his head, "You call the spirit Bakura?"

"Oh, yeah," Anzu says, "Is that weird?" Don't you do the same thing? She wants to ask that but doesn't quite have the courage.

"A bit. Yeah." Ryou sounds more and more distant with each word.

Desperate for any other reason to give Ryou other than that's what he told me to do she finally settles on one.

"It helps me keep you two separate."

Out of the corner of her eye, Anzu can see Ryou mouthing the word separate.

"You and him are so different," she says, more to herself than Ryou, "Even more than Yuugi and his other…"

"Him?" Ryou asks, eyes glazed over a bit.

Anzu tries to say something, but his one word leaves her speechless.

"I don't think that the spirit that lives in the millennium ring is a 'him'. Or a person. Just darkness…it's just darkness…"

He's cringing, and Anzu reaches out to touch him while gently saying his name, but he moves away.

Ryou gets up from the bench and with a quiet barely there goodbye he leaves.

(Leaves Anzu alone.)

-0-

It's raining.

Anzu had never particularly liked the rain. It was always a nuisance. Now was no exception. Especially since the billowing rainclouds had block out the sun, making it even darker than it already was. She rounds the street corner, knowing that going down the next alley would probably bring her some unwanted attention. But it was the only way to get home.

Furthermore, Anzu knows she is being followed. Ever since she was thirteen she always had creeps trying to pull something. She was use to it by now and besides she could take care of herself. What was the worst that could him?

Her hair dripping as she walks, Anzu turns right and starts her journey through the pitch black alley. She'll give it five seconds.

1…2…3…4...5

"Hey, beautiful. Where are you heading?"

Perfect timing. Up in the sky thunder cracks.

Anzu didn't even have to glance at him to know what he looked like. Probably some bone-head buffed up on testosterone looking for an easy mark.

"I'm not interested," Anzu replies curtly, keeping her pace steady.

"Aw, come on honey bunch – don't be like that."

Honey bunch? She hadn't heard that one before. The jerk in question, white shirt and black hair, tries to cut her off by stepping in front of her. Anzu simply walks around him. She's almost out of this creepy spot, she'll be fine.

Suddenly, Anzu feels a sharp pain through her arm. That guy was squeezing tightly, glaring out her. Apparently, he didn't like to be ignored.

"You should be a little nicer to people, don't you think?" he sneers, pressing even hard.

"Let me go!" Anzu demands and tries to wiggle out of his grasp. She is already thinking of plan. Something along the lines of biting his arm, kicking him in the groin and then making a run for it.

But before she does any of that, the man lets out a loud scream. Instantly he let's go of her hand and Anzu falls back into a brick wall.

Bakura (she's knows its Bakura because his eyes are hard and piercing and he is standing straight and tall) let's go of the man's hand. By the light of a flickering street lamp, Anzu can see that Bakura had twisted the man's arm back until it cracked.

There's blood everywhere.

Bakura's angry. That much is clear. His features a lit up by such a deep cold fury. His eyes are as black as Anzu has ever seen him, his mouth is pressed into a fine line and his posture is similar to lion on the prowl. She knows she should be intimated…but she's not. Anzu knows (knows with all of her heart) that he's not here to hurt her.

The man, on the other hand, she wasn't too sure about.

Bakura pulls the man up by his hair and Anzu is close enough to hear what he whispers to her attacker.

"If I ever see you again, I will kill you. Get out of my sight."

He throws the assailant into the wall and the man trips, stumbles, and then darts of the alley.

It's only her and Bakura now. Anzu's heart is pounding even louder than it does when she is dancing on stage. She doesn't mind it much.

Bakura looks at her up and down, then takes a step towards her.

"You're not scared," he sounds amused and faintly surprised.

Anzu stares him back, the twisting in her stomach becoming unbearable. But still, she replies.

"Not even a little."

She close, so very close, closer than she would ever have thought possible. He wasn't retreating, or flinching away (Like Ryou, says a part of her mind that Anzu had been ignoring more and more lately). In fact, maybe it was just her imagination but he seemed to be moving closer too. Closer, closer, closer…

Bakura pulls Anzu straight into his arms and their lips meet.

His kiss is everything Anzu would expect of him. Sharp, aggressive, controlling and…and something else. A sort of hidden tenderness, behind everything. She parts her lips a bit just to see if she can find more of his secret good.

The rain pours down harder, but Anzu's sure they've both stopped caring.

-0-

Anzu's memories of love and rainy kisses are interrupted rather rudely when she's see a familiar white-haired boy walk stepping on to the bus.

It's Ryou.

"Ryou!" Anzu exclaims, excited. It's been so long since she's seen him, "Over here!"

Ryou looks at her, or more accurately towards. His eyes are like another world to Anzu, though he is looking at her it really feels as if he is looking through her. Like he can see everything.

…Does he know?

Ryou gives a small polite and so extremely forced smile and sits in the seat across from her.

He doesn't give her a reply.

Deeply hurt, for no real reason Anzu turns to look back at him.

"Um…" the air between them is so thick Anzu can barely breathe, "How have you been?"

"Fine," Ryou replies curtly without looking her in the eyes.

Anzu cringes a bit, but tries again. They're friends after all. She had to try.

"What have you been up to? I feel like it's been ages since we've seen each other. Whenever I'm around it's always your other who's in control..."

This time it's Ryou who cringes. Hard. It's really was nothing less than a full body twitch.

In retrospect, that was probably not a good icebreaker. But his reaction hurts Anzu so severely, right in the core of her heart. If he could just know Bakura like she did, if he could just put aside whatever had between them he would see too that he's not evil../ just damaged goods.

Just something broken that needs fixing.

"He really is a good person Ryou!" Anzu blurts out, desperate to defend the theft of heart. "I know he doesn't always show it…but deep down, there is light to him. I can feel it." (_Whenever he looks at me, or grabs my hand, or kisses me…_)

No response.

And then a quiet:

"You don't know him."

"What?" Anzu says, of all things she was not expecting that.

"I know you think you know him, but you don't. Anzu-chan, he's only going to hurt you. I know I've…" Ryou trails off, but his big chocolate brown eyes are wide with concern.

Anzu smiles softly. He still cares about her; they're still friends.

"I have faith in him," she assures him, "I know I can fix him."

The worry from Ryou's eyes drain and in a split second they become dark and hard.

Ryou was glaring at her.

"You can't change him or fix him," Ryou says coldly, borderline sneering. Anzu flinches. This is the first time he has ever spoken to her with aggression.

"He's not like you or me, he doesn't _feel_ anything. Not really. And no matter how much you look for it, there will _never_ be good in him."

Ryou's words are so definite, nothing at all like she is used to from him (he is always so swaying like the wind). They are cruel, devoid of any sympathy and most of all they spoken with bitterness of experience.

Had he ever tried to find good in the darkness?

It had never crossed her mind (another thing she found she was losing, her ability to consider her friends) that Ryou would ever actually try to be friends with Bakura.

"Ryou," she whispers and tries to hold back tears. Anzu reaches out to grab his hand (always reaching out, but Ryou never seems to be within her grasp) but he pulls away.

He stares at her for a long moment; deep, endless brown eyes.

"Goodbye, Anzu," Ryou mumbles and gets up out his seat. Any sign of his former attitude is gone, replaced with classic Ryou – slouching, quiet and an unfathomable amount of hurt in his eyes.

He leaves the bus and Anzu doesn't even bother to go after him.

-0-

Ryou steps into the crowded arcade and the first thing he is sees is a striking brunette racking up massive points on the DDR machine.

Anzu.

Ryou recoils a little. He hadn't come here for Anzu, he had come for Yuugi. He hadn't even known Anzu was even going to be here. If he had, he probably would have never come (maybe that's why Yuugi didn't tell him). He really didn't want to see Anzu…now instead of pleasant warmth at the sight of Anzu he only ever saw the spirit.

Ryou tries to blend in with the crowd, hopefully long enough to leave without being noticed.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi calls and waves his hands to motion Ryou towards them. Ryou sighs heavily.

For Yuugi. He was only doing this for Yuugi.

"Hey, Yuugi-kun," he says and smiles a bit.

Anzu eyes widen at the sight of him.

"Ry – Bakura," she gasps, and Ryou knows she is only calling him that because Yuugi is here. She doesn't want Yuugi to know about her…whatever… with the spirit. Ryou stiffens a bit. That's good though, she should be ashamed.

(But now his heart stings for Yuugi, who now has two liars for friends.)

The shock of Ryou's arrival wears off and Anzu turns to Yuugi, pouting.

"I thought it was just going to be you and me."

Yuugi laughs nervously.

"Yeah, well, I invited Bakura too."

Anzu huffs.

Ryou stares at the ground.

Yuugi lets out an exasperated sigh.

"I don't know why you two are mad at each other," Yuugi says looking at both of them, "But I know whatever it is can't be worth losing your friendship!"

(If only Yuugi knew.)

"So come on! We are going to play some games and eat some pizza and have fun! Okay?"

Right then and there Ryou wants to just make up with Anzu, purely for Yuugi's sake. But then he remembers why he was angry with her in the first place.

She was in love with the spirit of the millennium ring.

A wave of nausea hits him. She loved him. The spirit who stole, killed, and trapped his friends into figurines – tortured him on daily basis. (Because no matter what the spirit claimed, it was torture. Everything the spirit had ever done to him was torture.) She loved that! Darkness, soulless…things that should not be loved. The spirit was a thing that did not _deserve_ Anzu's love. (Anzu was lovely, he was beginning to forget that fact, beginning to forget that he had started all this mess…everything was being forgotten in his rage.)

But he had a right to be angry! (Didn't he?) Couldn't she see that the spirit was a lost cause? Couldn't see learn from his mistakes?

Defeated (by everything) Ryou looks up at Yuugi.

"Okay," he says.

Anzu looks down at Ryou, brilliant blue eyes filled with sadness.

"Okay," she says.

Yuugi smiles so big and bright. "Great! Let's go have fun!"

-0-

Anzu's not sure how it happened, but somehow the crazy crowd of the arcade had pushed them to the very back of the building. People were bumping and pushing into them, she was sure she was going to be covered in bruises by the end of the night.

"Quick!" Ryou (it was Ryou right? She didn't get a look at his face) says as he props open a door, "In here."

Anzu quickly follows him in, anything to get away from that death crowd. Yuugi trails behind him. Someone turns the lights off and then there is only blackness.

A feeling, like a snake slithering around her leg, consumes her body but it is as fades as quickly as it came.

"Yuugi! Ryou!" Anzu shouts, but neither of them respond.

She tries again and this time she is responded with light filling the room. Except, it wasn't a room at the arcade anymore. It was…a hallway.

Ryou and Yuugi lie on the floor, Bakura and the other Yuugi standing above them.

Anzu takes a step backwards. What had just happened?

The other Yuugi helps Yuugi get up, while Ryou pulls himself up as Bakura refuses to look at him. Anzu looks around trying to piece together where they were and why the spirits who resided in the millennium items suddenly – for no apparent reason – had bodies.

The hallway was just a hallway. Nothing exciting or unusual about it. The only thing rather odd was the five doors surrounding it. Each one was different. There a light blue one coated in what looked like dust, a bright orange door, a childish looking one, a big metal door, and then another metal like door wrapped in chains and locks.

"What's going on?" She asks all four of them, but none of them give her an answer.

Ryou, who still hasn't said a word to Bakura (and vice versa), brushes off the dust from the light blue door. He sighs.

"Do you recognize yours?" He asks at Yuugi and the other Yuugi. They both give small nods.

"What do you think we should do?" Yuugi asks his other, whose face despite it being stony, still betrays a bit of fear.

"I don't know aibou," he says softly to Yuugi.

Bakura rolls his eyes and walks straight to the door that had all the locks and chains. Wordlessly, he steps in.

Ryou then too opens his door.

"Maybe we should just see what's inside," Yuugi pleads, "It can't be that bad right? They're our souls."

They stare long into each other's eyes and Anzu feels even more disconnected and confused. How could souls relate to doors?

"Alright," the other Yuugi finally agrees. They both depart, Yuugi going towards the childish one and his other towards the one next to Bakura's.

That left Anzu with the one right next to her. A bright orange door with a sign saying "DANCER 4 LIFE" hanging off the doorknob.

Slowly, Anzu pulls open her door.

She tentatively and gracefully takes a step in. It – wherever it is – is dark, pitch black in fact. Anzu squints but she still can't see anything. Then, a bright white light shines down on her – a spotlight. It's only then she realizes she is no longer in her school uniform, but in her tutu and toe shoes.

Her body moves by its self and she begins to dance. She twirls and spins all while trying desperately to regain some control. The blackness around her changes and instead of blackness there are memories surrounding her. The first time she met Yuugi, the first time she danced, the first stalker she had…all things good and bad were playing like a movie on the walls.

If the forced movements weren't already making her dizzy, her life movie was. It didn't go in order either, just flashes of things. Flashes of Ryou – smiling and content – head bent and eyes glazed. Flashes of Yuugi, then Bakura, then that kiss…everything rushing together and blurring together until –

Yes! She's regained control of her body. No more dancing.

The room is black again. Then, slowly, she sees a dim white light in the distance. She runs towards it, anything to get away from the darkness. As she gets closer she sees the outline of a boy. A boy she knows, but not well enough.

Ryou turns around and looks at her. He smiles. It's soft and sad and everything that Ryou really is. She reaches out for his hand but she can't grab hold of him. His hand disappears like the wind and swiftly Ryou fades away.

Darkness again, until the crack of thunder illuminates the room.

Where Ryou stood, there is a shadowy figure. He is smirking and radiating a subtle arrogance. Again, Anzu reaches out for him, but she trips over herself. Stumbling, stumbling.

Anzu stumbles out of the doorway, gasping for breath. By far, that was the worst thing that had ever happened to her. It scares her more than it should that she's still in her ballerina outfit.

At least she's out of the terrible, fun house on drugs, room now. The empty hallway is way better than that.

There is a loud noise – is it _screaming_?– coming from the large metal door. Bakura's room.

She takes a step forward, hoping to eavesdrop and maybe learn a little bit about the unending mystery he was. But before Anzu's made more than three steps the door flies open.

A small gasp escapes her.

Bakura too stumbles out of his room in an outfit just as bizarre as her is. He is wearing a blood red cloak (and much too her embarrassment no shirt) and is dripping in gold. Bracelets, chains and few other things that she can't name. Everything on him looks so ancient.

Bakura staggers closer to her and only then does she see that he is bleeding.

"Bakura!" She cries and rushes towards him. He glares at her, black eyes that burn like cigarettes. It doesn't deter her though. Anzu, no matter how much she knows she should be, is not afraid him.

She rips off a piece of her tutu and gently wipes off the blood in the center of his chest. There is blood other place on him (like his hands) but she's certain the wound was here.

He hisses, "Don't touch me," and clutches onto the wall for support.

"You're hurt," she says without stopping her work, "Let me help you."

Bakura eyes widen, shocked by her serenity and then settle by glaring at the ground. Before Anzu can smile and relish in her victory a low sort of rumble comes from Ryou's very plain looking door.

Anzu's breath hitches and Bakura's eyes narrow.

His door opens very slowly and Anzu is sure she hears it creaking. Ryou's form becomes apparent and he is always wearing something ridiculous, something she only saw him in once before. Monster World. The robe and staff he is holding are identical to the one his lead figurine had on. Complete with that funny hat too.

Bakura growls.

Anzu impatiently waits for Ryou _to just come out already_; her heart is about ready to burst.

Ryou stops, takes one step out of the doorway and then collapses into a dead faint.

-0-

When Ryou regains consciousness a couple seconds later, he is pressed against the wall and the spirit is searching for a wound.

(The spirit is bleeding too, but Ryou ignores it. There is always blood on the spirit.)

There would be no wound; he fainted from the memory of losing his soul during the Monster World Game. Suddenly, awareness dawned on him about how violating what the spirit doing was and he shook the spirit off.

"Don't _touch_ me," he mutters, speech slightly slurred.

The spirit (as always) ignores him.

If Ryou didn't know any better he would actually think that the spirit was concerned for him. But that was impossible (…merely wishful thinking.)

Anzu was concerned though; he could see it in her eyes. They were a bright sky blue, but a bit watery like she was holding back tears.

"Are you alright?" She asks, leaning down towards him. Her hair tied up in a bun and she has the necklace he gave her on. In fact, in looks like both Anzu and the pendant were wearing the same outfit.

"Yeah. I'm fine."

Ryou sneaks a look at the spirit, whose face betrays no emotion. He's dressed in the attire Ryou has seen him in before; those nights when the spirit's nightmares would also become his own.

Yuugi and the Pharaoh's doors were still present, which meant they would just have to wait for them to come out as well. The sooner, the better.

He still hadn't the slightest clue as to what was going on.

The spirit scans him up and down and then gently places his back against the wall. That act of kindness feels Ryou's stomach with pure, unrefined hatred.

"…I don't understand you," Ryou finally says, his voice partly a growl and partly a plea, "At all."

The spirit snorts but cannot stand Ryou's glare and finally averts his eyes.

Somehow that feels like a victory.

-0-

Their absolute refusal to acknowledge each other was astounding. Anzu was just in awe. They never looked at each other or talked to each other. And when they had to relay some message to the other, it was either done by one of the two talking about the person instead of at, or simply telling Anzu.

It was as remarkable as it was infuriating.

Yuugi and the other Yuugi doors had disappeared. Just vanished. They sat in the same place, hoping that maybe the two doors would reappear but Anzu was having doubts. It was hard not to. No one had explained to her just what exactly was going on yet.

But that she could deal with. She would have faith that Yuugi and the other Yuugi would be just fine. She would wait for them. What she couldn't deal with was the dead silence that was suffocating them all.

"Why won't you two talk to each other?" She declares, the anxiety and the silence finally pushing her to the edge.

They both regard her with contempt. Ryou with a polite edge and Bakura with a far more pissed off edge.

"Ryou?" She puts him on the spot, a thing she knows he hates.

He looks away. "As far as I'm concerned he is nothing more than a voice in the dark corners of my mind."

Anzu looks at Bakura who is snarling.

"And you?" She's a bit more nervous when talking to Bakura. Not out of fear of him, but of fear of what he'll say to Ryou. For whatever reason, they brought out each other's flaws.

He doesn't address her; instead he looks directly at Ryou.

"You're pathetic," he says with a low laugh, "Denial is the only thing you're capable of. You deny the reason for your existence, your family and even that night in the rain…"

Bakura taunts and Ryou's eyes flash. Then quickly he turns his focus at Anzu.

"Anzu?" He asks quietly.

She hasn't the slightest idea what to say, or what had just been said. It was like she was still in the room, where everything was spinning and crashing in on her.

"I…"

Ryou, eyes wide with hurt, gets up. And then he runs.

"Ryou, wait!" Anzu yells and takes a step forward to go after Ryou.

"Don't bother," Bakura sneers, "All my host ever does is run away. He's a coward."

Bakura lets out a low chuckle.

"He'll come back though. He always does."

Anzu purses her lips. Ryou was a lot of things, but he was not a coward. But maybe he didn't know Ryou like she did. When he was in presence of Bakura, it seemed to Anzu that Ryou was an entirely different person.

"He's different when he's around you," Anzu says, voicing her thoughts, "You make him…cold."

She always wants to tell him that he's a lot crueler when Ryou is around too, but she thinks he already knows that.

Bakura visibly cringes. Anzu takes it as a good thing…that means he cares, right?

"I have to go after him. I can't lose another friend." She had meant for the words to sound strong and self-assured but it really just sounded like she was apologizing.

She starts running.

"Ryou! Ryou!" Anzu calls, jogging after him, "Ryou wait! You can't just run away! Ryou!"

He pays her no heed, so Anzu has to drastically increase her running. The hallways had no end either way, so they could feasibly be running forever. Besides, they all had to stick together. That was the only way all three of them were going to get through this. And she couldn't lose Ryou like how she lost Yuugi. _Yuugi_.

Finally, Anzu is close enough to Ryou to yank his arm back.

"What is your problem!?" She demands as she pulls him to face her.

Ryou's face is even paler than usual.

"You kissed him," He accuses, nausea clearly written on his face.

Anzu's face turns a bright red.

"Um…yeah, well…" She has no idea how to explain what had happened that night to Ryou, especially because essentially Anzu had been kissing Ryou too.

Ryou isn't fazed by her demeanor.

"Why?" He asks, so truthfully Anzu knows Ryou can't even begin to comprehend why she would do such a thing.

"I um…" I love him, she thinks but for whatever reason she can't bear to tell Ryou that. "He saved me!"

There, that was reasonable.

Ryou looks up with wounded eyes, "Saved you?"

"Yeah, from a stupid thug. Not that I was scared…it was just really thoughtful and sweet and romantic…" Anzu trails off, remembering the bliss of that night.

Ryou blanches.

"It's funny," Ryou says with no hint of humor, "He always shows up just in the nick of time. He saves you from everyone and everything. Protects you."

He snorts.

"But he's not protecting you _because_ of you. He's protecting you because he thinks you're _his_," Ryou pauses, "I don't think there's anything romantic about that."

Anzu frowns, startled by his tone. It was so bitter, the kind of bitterness only borne out of experience, yet it was still Ryou. Still a polite, barely there, sort of voice.

"…I think I hate him," Ryou says and then stares at the ground as if those words had robbed him of any courage he had.

"Ryou," Anzu consoles and reaches out to touch his shoulder. She is beginning to realize Ryou is just as damaged as his other.

To her surprise, he lets her touch him.

"He doesn't deserve to be hated," Anzu explains, "I know he's done some bad things – but I always know everyone deserves a second chance. Don't you think you should give him that, Ryou?"

Ryou flinches away from her, looking confused and even a bit hurt.

"Anzu," that word pains him, "You don't understand…you couldn't understand…what he has put me through. I used to be like you too, I used to think that everyone deserved a second chance. But I was wrong. Sometimes, sometimes people are just…unchangeable."

That glazed look is back in his eyes and she knows she has no hoping in reaching him.

"He'll hurt you," Ryou says bluntly. Suddenly, all of Anzu's affectionate towards him is gone replaced with righteous rage.

"You don't know that!" She says angrily.

"I do." His words are soft, wistful and windy.

Ryou looks towards and gives her a sad broken smile. "You deserve so much better Anzu, so much more than he has to give. He has nothing to give."

Anzu's anger vanishes.

"He does. I know it. You both do," she smiles at him, the clear hope shining through her eyes, "I help him because it helps you too, Ryou! You two, you're two halves of the same soul. If one of you is redeemed, you both are. But if one is lost…then you're both condemned. Don't you understand? You two need each other." _I need both of you too_.

Ryou does his look passed, look through and then stares behind towards Bakura.

"No. I don't understand. Not even a little bit." He sounds so sad, like he has lost the most important thing to him.

All Anzu wants is to help him, heal him, make him smile like he did those days they spent in the park.

"Come on," Ryou says finally, "We can't just wait around anymore. Let's go find Yuugi."

Yuugi…Yuugi…it feels like he was a millennium ago. She misses him.

"Right!" Anzu agrees and they walk back towards Bakura.

-0-

It feels like centuries have passed, it feels as if he, the spirit and Anzu had been here since the dawn of time (and at the rate of progression, until the end of it.)

Ryou tries to shake the negativity off of him.

He had to find Yuugi. It was his…his fault that they were in this mess. He had to get Yuugi (and Anzu, for that matter) out of it.

They round another corner is the infinite hallway and again there is no sign of either Yuugi or the Pharaoh's door. It's as if they had been erased from history.

Ryou continues on through the hallway. They had to find them. They just had too.

"Hey!" Anzu shouts, her voice full of enthusiasm, "Look!"

He does just that and to his relief he sees a door. It's not either of their soul room doors, but it is most certainly better than nothing.

Anzu opens before he does and they both file in. (Ryou is acutely aware of the spirit behind them, but ignores him the best he can.)

"Yuugi?" Anzu says and Ryou pushes passed her.

What Ryou sees next is nothing short of terrifying.

Yuugi and the other Yuugi, bound by thick chains and attached the wall of this nowhere room.

No.

-0-

So it had finally come. Millenniums spent waiting and now the moment was well within his grasp.

His host catches on before the girl.

"Y-yyou," he stutters out, forever weak, "You planned this all…it was a trap…"

His host clasps his hand to his mouth, the weight of the truth crashing down on him. Bakura can see it in his eyes as his host realizes (or remembers, more accurately) all that has happened and all that will come to pass.

With a soft "Yuugi" his host collapses on to his knees.

The girl rushes towards him, trying to shake him out of it.

"Ryou!" She says, "Ryou? What's wrong – what's going on?"

His host will tell her eventually, for now he deserved to wallow in his victory. The Great Pharaoh and his container, chained and helpless. Truly a beautiful sight.

He walks toward them, trying to decide how to kill them. He's already made up his mind to kill the container first, just so he can see the look in the Pharaoh's eyes as he murders his precious 'partner'. But he still hasn't worked out how.

"_W-wwwhat_?" The girl cries out. So now she knows.

He wonders what she'll do now. The girl is always surprising him, unlike his host who is dreadfully _predictable_. The girl always does something unexpected, something to change and reshape his previous thoughts of her. Perhaps she would willingly stay by his side. Bakura, in truth, would much prefer that. He knows already that his host will throw a fit.

Everything would be so much easier if they both just accepted the fact that they were _his_.

"Bakura," the girl whispers, "Please, tell me that it's not true."

"I am only delivering justice that was never served." That was the truth. There was nothing truer than the blood on the Pharaoh's hands.

He has decided. He'll slip the little one's throat and watch the blood spill out like rubies. And, of course, make the Pharaoh watch too.

Knife in hand, he takes a step towards where they are both chained. The girls let's out more cries, but doesn't do anything. Good. Finally, everything was working perfectly. Working out in his favor.

His host steps in front of him, holding up his ridiculous game staff.

His host – again always in his way. He did not have time to waste on his host! Too much time had been wasted as it was and Kul Elna was to be avenged now!

"Move aside, yadonushi," He hisses, nostrils flaring.

His host looks up at him with dark, never-ending brown eyes and says the two words Bakura never thought he would hear.

"I won't."

-0-

"I won't."

Ryou stares at his feet and to Anzu it looks as if he's gone insane. He's shaking, trembling, he can't even hold the staff steady in his hands. And all she can he is the slurred repetition of 'I won't.'

(I won't, I won't, Iwon't Iwon't iwon'tiwont.)

She wants to run to Ryou but her feet are glued to the ground behind Bakura.

Anzu, to her horror and self-disgust (weren't they friends – she should help him, the Anzu she used to be would help him – ), can do nothing but watch as Ryou falls apart.

-0-

"I won't let you hurt them!"

Ryou says, and means it. Means it more than anything he has ever said, more than anything he has ever said to Anzu. (And that was everything…and now he would lose it all.)

No. He wouldn't be selfish. Keeping Yuugi as a friend, trusting the spirit, being with Anzu, believing the spirit – all that had been due to his egoism. And all it had brought was destruction and misery.

So, no. No more selfishness, no more second chances.

It would end tonight.

"I won't let you hurt them or anyone – not ever again!" Ryou says this louder this time, his words ringing from the walls with his new found certainty. A wave of magic goes through, vibrating the room.

The spirit looks at him in disbelief.

Ryou stands his ground. He couldn't care anymore.

The spirit's eyes flash with the realization that yes, Ryou was standing up to him.

(Stopping him.)

"How dare you get in the way of my revenge!" The spirit roars, "Stupid, pathetic ungrateful little _boy_, after all I've done for you, you betray me like –"

"Shut up!" Ryou screams and the crack in his voice makes it apparent the tears he is holding back.

(He would not be swayed, and he didn't care and the spirit was a liar and all he wanted was to be strong just once, just this once…)

"I'm sick of you and whatever twisted justice you think you're doing. You're a liar!" He's screaming now, screaming at the top of his lungs, "All you do is speak in lies! Everything…everything you ever said to me was…! Yuugi – he! He _is_ my friend! And I won't…I won't believe you…I _don't_ believe or trust you or…" he trails off; eyes back to the floor again, shaking.

The spirit laughs. Loud, frenzied and completely devoid of whatever it was that both he and Anzu were looking for.

(And then Ryou regains his composure.)

"I won't," he tells the spirit, directly and forcefully, "_I will not_– let you hurt him."

His staff begins to glow.

The spirit's laugh dies off. He is not intimated or amused. He is furious, his face twisted into an expression of pure disgust that Ryou would have never before that moment thought possible.

"You wouldn't," the spirit snarls and taunts, "You _couldn't_. Not me, you're not strong enough, you don't hate me enough…"

"No! BE QUIET! You're wrong…you've always been wrong…all this…I don't want it anymore. I don't! And I don't…care about you and I'm not – I'm _**NOT**_ afraid of you!"

The spirit steps back, in shock and awe.

Ryou eyes are burning with almost as much power as the staff he is holding. The bright white light from radiates and starts consuming the room, consuming them both (together, how perfect, didn't Anzu once say they'd be each other's redemption or condemnation?)

"Anzu…" The word spills out of Ryou's lips.

The all consuming light drowns out everything; he can't even see the spirit a couple of feet in front of him. It burns a bit, but not as much as that word he spoke moments ago.

"Sorry…"

Then, eternity.

-0-

When that light, (that light that is so impossibly bright, so bright it hurt) finally fades, Anzu sees everything.

Yuugi is still curled up in a corner like a sleeping kitten, the millennium puzzle still in his grasp. It was glowing slightly, throbbing actually so with a sigh of relief Anzu assumes that the other Yuugi is safe too. They had been transported back to that room in the arcade and everything appeared just how they left it; the light that Ryou had created hadn't left a speck of damage. Everything looked exactly the same.

Except there was no Ryou or Bakura. Tears are already spilling out of her eyes and she hasn't even looked properly yet. She just knows. In the deepest part of her soul she knows.

The millennium ring lies motionless in the middle of the room, all gold and lies.

Anzu races towards it, maybe there was hope, maybe there was a way –

When she pulls the ring to her chest, it burns her slightly. But that only makes her hug it closer. Anzu lifts it up by the string and presses her lips against the metal.

And whispers those three small words, over and over again.

Many years later, she still kisses the ring every night before each of her performances.

("For good luck.")

* * *

OMG. I promise from now on no chapter will ever be that long. I don't even /like/ Vexshipping. I don't know how this happened. Especially because...me and romance don't mix. Maybe I should stick to my angst. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it.

If you did, Review!!!


	54. Silence & Shadows

* * *

_So when you ask "Is something wrong?"/I think "You're damn right there is but we can't talk about it now." ~ Tiny Vessels, Death Cab for Cutie_

* * *

"Something wrong, Bakura-kun?"

The streetlight above Ryou and Yuugi flickered on and off. The shadows surrounding them grew stronger and stronger. Thick tentacles of darkness lashed out at them and Ryou, by nature (by memory) took a step back.

Disgusted (at _it_, at himself and it was irrelevant if those two things were or were not the same), he clenched his fists and glared. He couldn't be afraid anymore.

He wouldn't.

The streetlamp flickered. (The shadows grew stronger and stronger.)

"Bakura-kun?" Yuugi persisted and his eyes clouded over with worry.

Everything behind Yuugi was engulfed in darkness and Ryou knew if he looked ahead of the violet eyed boy he would surely see the same thing.

(Stronger and stronger and…)

Ryou hugged his school books closer to his chest, trying to block the ring even more. Yuugi looked at him with the same doe eyed, concerned expression. Ryou knew it was rude to keep Yuugi waiting for an answer.

But the darkness around them remained.

(Stronger and stronger.)

Ryou's lip twitched and he ached to give Yuugi answer, no matter how harmful, but no words came out. He paused, looked back again (and saw the streetlights flickering and the shadows gaining their strength).

And Ryou said nothing.

* * *

A/N Sorry about the delay! Internet issues.

As always, reviews are cherished!


	55. Freedom

A/N Takes place post-series. Dedicated to **The Quote Bandit**, as requested!

* * *

_Freedom is the freedom to say two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows. ~ 1984, George Orwell_

* * *

Domino is much colder than Egypt.

(Too cold, some part of him tells him…some part that isn't there anymore.)

When Ryou steps off the plane, he shivers. He hates the cold.

Above him, snow has just begun to fall. Ryou cringes. As far back as he can remember, he has never liked the snow.

(As far back…)

Yuugi says something to him, but Ryou ignores it.

-0-

The day after they return from Egypt, Ryou does not return to school with the others.

He can't. (The thought, the sickening _thought_ of having to see them, his friends, having to look them in the eye after everything, was just too much.)

Plus, there is no one there to force him. According to Yuugi anyway…and it is believable, isn't? The ring is gone and he saw the Pharaoh cross over with his own two eyes.

It was real. (Wasn't it?) The spirit of the ring is gone. He is free.

Ryou clutches his head and sinks down to the floor, pulled by invisible chains that should be gone by now. There is a sharp pain in his chest, like that of five pendants digging into his skin…

But there is nothing there.

Even though he feels it, it's not real.

(Familiar despair sets in, and even though everything has changed…nothing has.)

-0-

It's a dream. Anything good is always a dream.

Beautiful though, even if it isn't real. A great wide open field at the bottom of a hill is blanketed in snow and above him a tree is coated in icicles. Surreal.

Behind him, he hears laughter. Sweet laughter, giggly and carefree, the laughter of a child.

Ryou turns around and in the distance he sees a girl playing in the snow.

(He searches for more detail, the colors of her clothes, her height, but the dream will not allow it.)

Ryou runs closer, even though he knows he shouldn't. Never before was he allowed to get any closer to the girl then he is now. When he tried, the light grey sky would flash to black and the girl would disappear. And then there would be laughter, but of a different kind…

"I love the snow, don't you Ryou?" She calls out to him.

Ryou opens his mouth to call back, to ask her who she is and how she knows him, but no words come out.

(Is the spirit of the ring still here, still residing in the dark corners of his mind?)

She keeps calling to him, the same phrase again and again, but Ryou doesn't move from his spot.

He doesn't want to hear that laughter.

(It can't really be gone.)

-0-

Ryou goes to school the next day.

He should after all. The last thing he wants to do is stand out and besides he has Yuugi's friendship to maintain.

It's snowing. Some part of him (commands, forces) tells him he hates the cold. So he does.

(Better safe the sorry, Ryou thinks to himself, better to listen then face the consequences.)

School isn't like it usually is; there is no haze-like fog. Ryou _feels_ everything. He feels the kids mutter about him behind his back, feels their stares. Even…even Yuugi's smile reaches him today.

(He ignores these feelings as best as he can.)

It's only by his body's routine that he knows what classes he has and where they are. Math is his first period, though he couldn't tell what kind if someone asked.

Or what their homework was.

Or the teacher's name.

(Another feeling he ignores bubbles to the surface. Loneliness.)

The teacher, a tall bulky man with black hair, writes a problem on the board and tells the class to solve it.

Ryou can't. Numbers and the symbols all blur together into a blob of…nothing. He searches through his memory for something, anything that would help him with this.

But there is only fog.

A wave of hysteria crashes over him. He can't do anything without the fog, he needs the fog to come back, how will he ever live without? Ryou can't remember anytime without fog…

His pencil snaps in half. He was squeezing it too tight.

Ryou takes in a deep breath. There was no choice. He had to do this.

(There was no choice in any and all of the matters of the ring, so he should be use to it.)

Okay. Okay. He would solve this.

The white-haired boy picks up the remains of his pencil and in the margins of his paper begins to scribble all the things he can see through the fog.

Back to basics.

_2+2=4_

-0-

It's been a month since his time in Egypt and no one has noticed a changed in Ryou. Probably because there was none.

None, except for one.

His math grade is up. For once, there is a class he looks forward too. Ryou loves math. More than creampuffs and role-playing games.

(Maybe even more than having Yuugi as a friend.)

Math was certain. They would always be an answer; it was _solvable_. Not at all like life, his in particular. Life was a paradox, though it paraded around as being simple it was really full of doubts, lies and slavery. There was no answer to life, no hidden meaning or missing variable. It was pointless.

Math was definite. You could not change the answer without changing the problem. No one could ever tell you that two plus two equals five, that was impossible. Ryou loves that about math. The stability. His life had been forcefully shaped by others, but nobody could do what they did to him, to numbers. The answer would always be the answer.

Despite all the lies (despite himself), two plus two would _always_ equal four.

Nobody (not even, he thinks dangerously, the spirit of the ring) could ever change that.

-0-

It's that dream again.

The one with the girl he can't see and her beautiful laughter.

"I love the snow, don't you Ryou?"

No, he thinks with ferocity, I hate it.

(He's not sure why though.)

She pays no attention him and plays in the snow some more. That's when Ryou decides that he is going to see her face.

He dashes from the top of the snowy hill and down to where the girl is. She, as always, does not stop her playing. Like a broken record.

(Again and again and again until he can solve the puzzle.)

So close! Ryou reaches out to grab her, so he can see her eyes (all he sees is a blurred out face - and he knows there is more to this girl, he is certain. It's true.) but she slips from his grasp.

And the small girl runs farther away from him.

_-0-_

The mirror is a liar.

He stares at it every day but it only shows his face. Just _his_ face. However, Ryou knows it's lying.

(It has to be.)

Unable to bare the lies, he covers them all up with sheets.

It doesn't change anything, though.

_-0-_

Ryou won't run after the girl this time around. It won't do him any good. No, this is a dream, after all. The girl won't know anything he doesn't know.

The dream is a problem, an equation. Ryou will find the answer, even if it means all he can do is watch her hazy body play in snow. There has to be an answer.

(There just _has_ to be.)

She throws great big handfuls of snow in the air and as always calls out to him.

"I love the snow, don't you Ryou?"

Who are you? He longs to call out, even if it is pointless. All he wants is name, just to know this girl has a name.

Then, suddenly, it comes.

Like a burst of sunshine through fog, Ryou knows.

Amane.

("_Yeah, I do Amane. I love the snow…_")

Her name is Amane. Ryou feels this with every fiber in his being. He is certain. It's true.

Certain. True.

(The world can't be divided into just truth and lies…so maybe this was a true-certainty? Not a whole truth, there was no such thing, but pretty close?)

Amane, Amane. The name is familiar and it belongs to him (however weird that sounds), he can tell. But he can't remember her. When he tries, all he sees is fog.

(From then on, every night before he goes to bed Ryou prays for sunshine.)

-0-

Ryou quickly rips off the sheet from the mirror, like ripping off a band-aid. The faster you do it, the less it will hurt.

(And to see just himself and nothing else looking back at him hurts so much as it is.)

But it must be done. To find the truth, (to finally be free from everything), to just know! He just wants to know.

Ryou deserves that much.

(There is nothing to be afraid of now. The spirit is gone…the spirit is gone. That is true - he is certain!)

Starring into the mirror, he tries to see past the fog the spirit created.

The truth.

(Something real, something definite.)

Then again, the truth (of this, of the past few years) was subjective. It changed.

When he called Yuugi friend he meant that. That was true. And when he promised to protect Yuugi (at any and every cost) he had meant that…but was it true? Ryou realizes this then, that as time passes, the line between truth and lie blurs. The things he meant and the things he felt back then (Was it really so far away? Was it really only three years?) did not always equate as true. He lied - lies - not only to others but to himself. Mostly himself. But Yuugi…Yuugi is always the exception, the rule breaker. He had never lied to himself about Yuugi. That was true; that was undeniable. But he had lied to Yuugi, that was undeniable as well. And he had failed. (Failed to protect him, failed to be worthy of his friendship, failed to like him as a person and not just as a shining ray of hope…) Wasn't failure just another form of lying?

How many lies had he told?

He stares at his reflection but it never gives him the answers.

-0-

Amane was real.

Ryou adds that to his list of true-certainties (two plus two equals four, the spirit was gone …).

Nothing could ever make her unreal. He may have forgotten her (she may have been stolen from him). But she had existed. She had been real; she had been true. He feels her in his dreams.

He'll find her. If he has to stay up every night, if he has to suffer through all his dreams. If he has to call his father. He'll find her.

(This was another true-certainty, though Ryou doesn't fully realize it at the time.)

Rebellion was a wonderful feeling, even if his oppressor was gone.

-0-

His…friends, only because there was no other word for them, cross the street. Talking and giggling and being happy.

Ryou doesn't move from his spot on the sidewalk. He's always behind them; he can't never just _catch up_.

(He can never be happy.)

Jounouchi turns around and motions for him.

"Oi!" he says, "What are you waiting for Bakura?"

Ryou doesn't have an answer.

(And, many days later when he lies awake at night listening to the echo of Jounouchi's question, he still can't answer.)

-0-

Ryou remembers.

Everything.

He remembers how it all started. From the very beginning, before he was named Ryou Bakura. When the Pharaoh condemned a village of thieves, when that village's souls were burned to create the millennium items…

Then he remembers the millennium ring, how it came as a gift from his father (his father… Ryou remembers that now too, though wishes he didn't) and how it hadn't always been apart of him. In fact, he had only been part of the ring for a couple of years…even if his soul told him it had been an eternity. He remembers that it's gone and that he should be happy about that.

But most importantly, he remembers Amane. In his mind he can see all of her perfect imperfections. They way her teeth were slightly crooked, how her light blue hair fell down her face in soft curls that would always be tangled and ratted by the end of the day. She had a laugh like wind chimes and she loved the snow.

Ryou loved the snow, too.

(The weight of all of that, of Amane and Kul Elna and Freedom crashes down on him.)

He suffers.

-0-

"Hey, hey! Bakura-kun! Wait up!" Yuugi calls, running after him.

Ryou doesn't want to stop. He has been avoiding Yuugi for some time now. There was a reason, of course. He was trying this new thing out - honest. Where he said only the things that were true. But Yuugi…Yuugi made that impossible. All the honest things Ryou had to say would only hurt him.

(And Yuugi doesn't deserve them anyway. Not really.)

Even though he knows this, he stops. Running was something he had always been forced to do. He wouldn't run anymore.

"Hello, Yuugi," Ryou says and gives a polite smile.

"Bakura." Yuugi's eyes are filled with worry. He opens his mouth to say more, but then looks down at the ground.

Ryou's heart skips a beat.

"Have you…" Yuugi trails off and is still staring at the ground, "Have you been avoiding me?"

The honest is answer is yes.

"I've just been busy."

Half-true. That was better than no truth at all, right?

"Oh."

They are both looking down at the ground, towards their shadows.

Finally, Yuugi regains his courage.

"Are you okay, Bakura-kun?"

(_No, but_ -) "I will be."

That was a certainty. Ryou smiles at Yuugi, and somehow through all the lies and the mistakes and the trauma, he means it.

"I have to go now, Yuugi-kun." A goodbye if Ryou ever said one.

Yuugi's eyes cloud over a bit; he understands.

"Oh, goodbye then Bakura-kun," a pause, "Will I see you around?"

"Maybe, I think…yeah, maybe."

That was another truth. Maybe he would be Yuugi's friend (a real friend, not the pretending thing they have now) someday. Maybe they could start over from scratch and be able to leave their past behind. Maybe Ryou could be Yuugi's friend despite everything the spirit had done.

Maybe.

And if not, that would be okay. Because it would be his choice.

Ryou leaves, but of his own accord.

-0-

He is standing on a snowy hill top, the wind blowing the falling snow in every direction. There is no laughter and no girl waiting for him at the bottom, but that's okay.

(Being alone, that was okay.)

A snowflake falls on his lips.

It tastes of warmth and choices and love and memories. All the precious little freedoms.

* * *

A/N It's safe to say that this oneshot really doesn't deserve George Orwells awesome name on it. But I did work really hard.

Late chapter is late for a REAL REASON. Against my sanity's wishes, I've decided to do NANOWRIMO (National Novel Writing Month) this year. Been getting my outline together.

I hope you enjoyed it! Please review!


	56. Happy Halloween

* * *

_If a man habors any sort of fear, it makes him landlord to a ghost. ~ Lloyd Douglas_

* * *

Ryou got down from the stool and inspected the scene before him.

He had put of fake spider webs in almost every corner of his house, even in the crooks outside his apartment door. Plastic spiders were nestled in-between the webs and he had even put a jack-o-lantern out in his window.

Halloween most certainly was a holiday Ryou appreciated. Occult had always fascinated him. The fact that the Celtics started the tradition of wearing costumes to blend in with the spirits and ghosts (and therefore protect themselves) that roamed Halloween night only added to that.

He didn't have a costume this year, though.

(There was no point; even the scariest mask wouldn't protect him from the spirit of the millennium ring.)

But in all honesty the decorations were just a way to keep him busy. It gave him something to do so he didn't have to think about the haunted day and the night that was fast approaching. (The spirit loved the night.)

The door bell rang and like the good host Ryou was, he answered it.

"Hello. Can I help you?"

A man emerged from the shadows with dark blue eyes and chocolate brown hair.

"Could I interest you in one of our many home cleaning projects?"

"I'm sorry. I have no need for whatever you're selling," Ryou frowned and as he tried to close the door, the man stuck out his foot to block it.

"I insist," the man said and his eyes narrowed.

Ryou felt the sharp prick of the tassels punching threw his skin.

Then, nothing.

The world came back to him in blurry pieces and with a sigh of relief the first thing he saw was the spider webs he had hung up. So at least he was home.

Still trembling a bit, Ryou stood to survey what had happened. As he always did when things of this nature accord, he checked his hands. (A silent prayer - _no blood, no blood, no blood_.) There was dirt underneath his fingernails.

Ryou cringed. The dirt wasn't dirt, it _never _was dirt…

That's when, out of the corner of his eye, he noticed one of the kitchen knives was missing. Ryou began to shake. Two words were written in a dark brownish reddish color above his window. It almost…it almost looked like the color of dried…

_Oh, god._

(Unholy, deranged, sadistic laughter filled his head.)

**Happy Halloween, my dear landlord.**

* * *

A/N For all those celebrating Halloween, Happy Halloween! Update is quicker than usually because Halloween is my favorite holiday. Next update should be anytime between next Sunday - Tuesday.

As always, please review!


	57. The Cruel Reality

A/N Vague hints of...well, honestly guys. This one is just plain vague. Post-series...ish.

* * *

_Reality is never as bad as a nightmare, as the mental tortures we inflict on ourselves. ~ Sammy Davis, Jr._

_

* * *

_

The story starts (like always, like always) with a –

"Once upon a time," Ryou's mother says to him, with wide gentle eyes.

Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away… Far, how far from home? Domino or Egypt?

Dear Amane,

We are leaving Egypt, today. Everything is over, it's all finally over.

But it's not truly over. Ryou still feels the ring around his neck.

(The weight of all his sins.)

His mother had been Catholic. Ryou's father hadn't really been anything, but would force the family to indulge in church every now and again. Amane had hated it, but he hadn't mind. Until his fascination with occult started (yes, it did start – there was a time when he had just been a child, so the spirit was wrong –)

Now, though, as he filters through memories without haze, he wonders what he is guilty of the most.

Envy? Or Sloth?

The darkness swells up around him, and smirks **wrath**, before it disappears into a snowy hill top where Amane smiles and giggles. Soon, that disappears too.

(It all fades away eventually – whether he had wanted it to or not.)

It all starts out so simply. Isn't that the worst – isn't that just the absolute worst? A present from his father (who was just trying to be kind, he assures himself, it wasn't as if his father had purposely…) or just his mother and sister going to the store.

Simple. Yet all ends in tragedy.

(Even from the beginning, when Ryou would fall asleep above the Egypt sand…even –especially that ended in tragedy…)

Oddly, it's fitting. Oddly, it's what he deserves.

Dear Amane,

It's odd but…but I can't remember where I was last night.

No. No. Something else, something else.

He is aware of what this is, to some extent, and there are some things he refuses to deal with.

Like that night, when he found out truly what the spirit was capable of.

(He scrubs and scrubs and scrubs but the blood never comes out…)

His mother taught him how to wash when he was seven. Ryou had always been a bright boy, always had been willing to help.

Ryou likes helping.

"Do onto to others as you would have them do onto you," his mother had told.

So does this mean someone soon will help him?

Flashes of violet, worried eyes. Yuugi's eyes. But Yuugi didn't help him. No matter how much Ryou had wanted Yuugi too, and how much he had helped Yuugi, he had never helped him…

"I'm here, I'm right here!" He screams at them, at friends who are not close enough to touch.

They can't hear him, and Ryou learns to accept this.

(The spirit was so _proud_ of him for that.)

"You're finally learning, landlord. The sooner you accept that you have always belonged to **me** –"

Suddenly, darkness wraps its arms around him and now there is less of a chance that Yuugi will ever hear him…

Bright, white light – that light that had blazed when the Pharaoh crossed over – illuminates this place.

The darkness is no longer there.

(But he feels it, he feels it.)

Or maybe…maybe he just wants to feel it. Maybe he doesn't want to be alone.

Alright. So he doesn't want to be alone. Is that so wrong?

Doesn't he deserve some form of companionship – even if it was parasitic?

"Well, Yuugi-kun?! Isn't my choice?!"

No answer. But he hears dark, sardonic, laughter.

Even here, even in the place that is his own creation, the spirit still mocks him.

(At least he realizes this. At least he isn't as crazy as he thinks.)

Amane hadn't thought he was crazy at all. She had called him brother and played with him in the snow. And when spring came and all the snow was gone, she would make crowns out of flowers. She'd place it on his head and playfully called him, "King."

King of what? King of what?

(Like always, he knows the answer, but questions are much easier to say that truths.)

The truth. Maybe he could say one…

He hates himself. That was true.

Because Ryou does, he really does hate himself. He has always hated himself. He has hated himself longer than he has loved games.

All he sees is a bright, flickering television screen.

BUY MONSTER WORLD NOW. COLLECT ALL PIECES.

The letters are blood red and flash, something a child would like. A seedy looking man in a bowtie pops on the screen.

(He is aware that this is not the present, but the scene continues on despite himself…)

"Wouldn't you like to be anyone you want to be?" The T.V announcer says and smiles. At the time Ryou thought it was genuine but he knows better now. The announcer is a liar and cannot be trusted. He comprehends this…but…comprehension doesn't change anything and he opens his mouth anyway.

"Yes," Ryou says, childish and innocent.

"Wouldn't you like to be someone else?" The screen zooms in on the announcer's smile.

"Yes!" Ryou nods his head rapidly.

The Ryou he is now shakes, in fear, in anger, in sadness because "The past is never changing. Blood spilt stains all time, my dear landlord. It can never be undone…"

_I take it back!_ He shouts angrily to the darkness._ I take it back, I take it all back! I just want to be me; can I just be me again?_

_Please?_

There is no answer, and the scene melts away like snow and souls. Burning, there is burning and fire and screaming and laughter.

The laughter of his sister. Who loved him. The laughter of the spirit. Who didn't.

They blur. They sound the same. It ends.

(And Ryou is left alone in darkness.)

Whispers come next, like always, spoken softly despite the harshness of their words.

"Did you hear what happened to that kid in Tokyo?"

"No, what?"

"Well, you know that new kid Bakura?"

"Yeah he seems really nice."

"Well that's what this kid – I think his name was Akio – thought too. But then – "

_Shut up. Stop it, stop it! You did this, it was you…I didn't want any of this…_

" – he went to his house and went into a coma. For like, no reason. He still hasn't woken up."

**But you did, landlord. Don't you see? You **_**wished**_** for me.**

Ryou doesn't even bother to call him a liar, because he's not.

"You should always be careful what you wish for," his mother had warned him, "you just might get it."

He should have listened.

He listens now though, as the laughter starts up again. It echoes loudly off of every inch of him, consumes him, entangles him, strangles him…

(…taints him…)

But all this is the past. So it is never changing.

On and on it goes, his life in reverse, fast forward, rewind and skip. Jumble bits of memories ("How can you not like snow, Ryou? It's so cold and soft and fun!") and lies (**Why would they ever want to be friends with someone as pathetic as you? What could you possibly offer them?**)

Or maybe they are both the same.

It seems pointless to judge them both now, because in the end they both left him.

Dear Amane,

I miss you a lot.

He's permitted that much at least. The letter burned and charred from the never-ending fire that started millennia ago, slips away.

And he lets it.

(He never really deserved her anyway.)

The ring stays inside of his skin, no matter how much he tugs, it never comes off.

_It's not off now. Sorry, Yuugi, but you're lying, it can never came off. But that_, (he knows, with insane certainty) t_hat is what I deserve._

**You and I are very much the same landlord, no matter what you tell those friends of yours… **

_No. You're wrong. We are different. _

Though, at the time he didn't know how or why, but he does now and isn't that better than never?

_You want to punish and I want to be punish._

They belonged together.

(So why had he left?)

But the past is unchangeable and fate unbreakable, so all the realizations of what the spirit was (in terms of him, at least) means nothing.

Ryou is left without darkness, which is worse than he imagined.

Worse than Amane's death, because at least than he could assure himself that she was in a better place now. "With God and the angels, making flower crowns with your mother, son."

(A crown for the King of Thieves?)

At least with Amane he is allowed to miss her.

All of it is empty. All of it is too complicated to deal with, too intertwined to examine by each thread.

So let it go, says a light voice, let it go…

It's hard. It's unwanted. It is unfair.

And it is –

(Soft, like whispers and snow.)

More of himself, just himself, alone. Then –

There is laughter; there is burning and fire, and screaming.

("And they all lived happily ever after…")

The end.

-0-

"Bakura! Bakura-kun, are you okay?"

Ryou is shaken out of his dream and looks deep into a pair of violet eyes. Worried eyes. Yuugi's eyes.

He looks away (like always, like always) and gazes out of the airplane's window. The sky is vast and endless…maybe even meaningless…and his eyes are his own.

"Fine, Yuugi-kun," he says without conviction, "it's just a nightmare."

* * *

A/N I think I wrote this because it had no plot. Compared to the two chapters in works for ASL...which have so much plot it's ridiculous, and don't even get me started on Nanowrimo, I'm already a whole day's word count behind...I really wanted to write something vague.

Hope it was a least semi-enjoyable. Please review! =)


	58. Twisted

A/N Format issues. No real note here.

* * *

_I hate this wretched willow soul of mine, patiently enduring, plaited or twisted by other hands. ~ Karin Boye_

* * *

Twisted.

Everything is twisted, now.

Their hands reach up, begging for help, screaming as they burn for eternity. Swirls form as they melt and sink only to rise and twist again. (An unbreakable cycle, even now, millenniums later, even now, as he watches.) The guards have no faces, either, not that he can see. There is nothing in their eyes but darkness.

The darkness twists also, as his family burns. It licks at the sides and swells when the screaming reaches it's loudest. Greedy, the darkness is very greedy. (And this, along with the suffering, does not change - even when his role has been reversed.) It twists and twists around everything so it can have everything.

His parents (the ones burning and twisting and screaming) taught him to want everything. Years later he finds the darkness very fitting for that.

But now (or then, for it's all the same in the ring) he is just a boy, whose innocence has been stolen. The shadows behind him grow and expand and _twist _-

And he stares.

Learns.

_Hates._

* * *

A/N Long time no update, huh? I'm really sorry...but NaNo just caught up with me. I sure hope all you guys are doing a lot better. Anyway, expect updates to resume normally next month.

(And I'm no even going to comment on the 400 reviews thing, because my mind would just explode from too much amazing.)

Reviews are loved! =)


	59. The Sands of Egypt

Chapter 59: The Sands of Egypt

A/N LATE UPDATE IS LATE BECAUSE LATE UPDATE IS OVER 20,000 WORDS. Seriously. I guess I lied about the whole never writing anything longer than Matters of the heart. But it has copious amounts of Bakura, Thief King, Malik and Ryou so I hope you enjoy it!

**This chapter is full of typos, grammatical errors, missing words and such. If that hinders your enjoyment of fic, please just skip this chapter and come back after my lazy butt gets around to editing it. **

Somethings to know:

The Lesser of Two Evils is canon in this.

Takes place when season five would normally take place and relies heavily on if you watched. Still slightly AU though.

* * *

_Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. ~ Martin Luther King Jr._

* * *

Ryou Bakura was accustomed to awaking in strange places.

The spirit of the ring (just the thought of him in passing made Ryou cringe) had a habit of getting Ryou stuck in the most random of places and then violently shoving him back into control of his body without him having the slightest clue as to where he is.

So it was no surprise to Ryou that he was not in his bed or even in his house.

What was surprising was the fact he was laying in sand. Ryou's eyes fluttered open and ungodly amount of sunlight poured onto him. He struggled to stand up and what he saw made him gasp.

Large, mountainous hills of sand surrounded him like armed guards and the bright blue sky didn't even have a wisp-like cloud. He recognized the landscape well; it was always on the postcards his father sent him.

Egypt.

_Oh, no._

-0-

Malik opened his eyes and found himself in a pile of sand.

Shocking, really. Sand, in Egypt. How unexpected.

The lilac eyed boy stood up and brushed the sand off. He tried to recall what happened, but to no avail. All he remembered was showing the Pharaoh the ancient tablet and…

No. No way.

Malik looked around wildly. Sand, sky, pretty much standard Egypt. Standard, not at all the way he it looked now. Like the way someone would imagine Egypt if it was a board game or someone only had half recollections of the place.

It looked like what Malik would assume the Pharaoh's memories looked like.

Malik let out an exasperated cry.

That just wasn't fair! Hadn't he already done his job as tomb keeper? What more could he possible do to serve the Pharaoh?

His stomach plummeted. Was this some sort of divine punishment for Battle City?

Whatever the case, he was stuck in the middle of the ancient Egyptian desert, with no food or water and no signs of civilization in sight.

Malik kicked the sand.

_Damn it_.

-0-

Ryou honestly hadn't the slightest idea where he was going.

He wasn't even sure what part of Egypt he was in, much less which way to the nearest city. Worse than that, he couldn't remember how (or why) he was in Egypt in the first place.

And the millennium ring was gone, so he couldn't even ask the spirit…

(Not like the spirit would have answered. But still.)

The sun was still high in the sky, so maybe it was one or two o'clock. That gave Ryou a little hope. Maybe he could find some help before the sun set. Because the heat was one thing Ryou at least knew how to deal with it, the cool desert nights were something completely different.

Ryou froze. Was that hooves heard? As in horses?

The white haired boy turned around cautiously. He'd always been a cautious child, but added to the fact that the spirit of the ring always made new enemies wherever he went, Ryou's carefulness had only increased.

What Ryou saw intensified his fear.

There were five people on horseback, though only one of them actually looked like a person. He had short, slightly spiky gray hair and a blood red cloak flowed from behind him. On this man's left and right were identical figures. All four men (if they could be called that) had glowing red eyes and were covered in black cloaks. It didn't even look they had faces.

Ryou's heart skipped a beat. He wanted to run, but his legs no longer worked.

The riders broke apart and encircled Ryou. Apparently, the time to run had come and passed.

The man with the red cloak rode right up to Ryou.

(Ryou willed himself to stop shaking.)

The man looked at him up and down. Then, as if he just became certain of something, smirked. He offered Ryou his hand.

"Get on."

When Ryou didn't take his hand faster enough, the man grabbed Ryou by the collar and threw him onto the horse. He pulled on the reins and the horses sped off.

Well, weirder things had happened.

-0-

Ryou was too terrified to ask questions, even though he was overflowing with them.

Like first and foremost, who were these mysterious riders? And where were they taking him? Why him?

Had he just been in the wrong place at the wrong time?

(Though Ryou seriously doubted that. Ever since he had received the millennium ring, there was no such thing as a coincidence.)

And of course, the man refused to talk to Ryou. On the other hand, Ryou was pretty certain that the black robed things couldn't talk period.

So they rode in silence and the knot in Ryou's stomach grew tighter and tighter.

Finally, after centuries of nothing but the sound of horse hooves, something became clear in the distance.

It was a village. Or at least what was left of it. The outline of a long group of huts was visible, but there was only fragments of actually homes. There were ashes everywhere, and the rubble of the houses was black.

Ryou shivered.

(Ninety-nine eyes watched him.)

The man in red looked at him inquisitively, as if he was waiting for Ryou to say something.

Ryou avoided his intense grayish blue stare.

The man snorted and turned away. He muttered something under his breath. It sounded vaguely like 'that damn bastard was right'.

What did that mean?

They road deeper and deeper into the village, they cloaked men always right behind them. The man with the red cloak pulled the horses reins. They stopped in front of one of the least charred houses.

The man leapt off the horse without another word.

He'd walked a totally of three feet before he turned back to Ryou.

Glaring, he said, "Well, come on, you can walked can't you?"

Ryou frowned and weighed his options. Obviously this man was quick to anger, and he was very…um…muscular…so the chances of Ryou being able to out run the cloaked man weren't so good. Better to just do what he said.

Ryou, cautiously, jumped off the horse.

The man glared at Ryou once more (Ryou had never meet person who hated him so much so instantly. Maybe they were scared of him that fast, but never hated.) before he turned and started to walk again.

The man kicked the door opened.

"I found him," he said to someone, gruffly.

Ryou's throat closed up. (Suffocating…it felt like he was suffocating…)

He knew who the man was talking before he even got inside.

"Good morning, Landlord," said a dark, twisted version of his own body.

Ryou froze and cold rage tore through his body.

"_You_," he hissed.

The man in red blinked, surprised at the amount of venom in Ryou's voice.

"I thought you said he didn't remember," the man in red asked, glaring at the spirit of the ring.

"He remembers some," the spirit of the ring replied.

It was only then did Ryou noticed something.

"You don't have the millennium ring," Ryou gasped.

How was the spirit able to be here, corporeal no less, without the ring?

"Not yet," the spirit of the ring said, shooting a poisonous glare towards the man in red. He returned it with more vigor.

Wait, did this man hate the spirit of the ring as much as Ryou did? Was it even _possible_ for someone to hate the spirit more than him?

"It doesn't matter," the spirit said again, refocusing his stare to Ryou, "They'll be mine eventually."

"Mine," the man in red muttered under his breath.

The spirit took a step forward to Ryou and he instinctively took a step back.

"What do you want from me?" Ryou glared, though it was lacking power, "You have your own body."

(Ryou found that he didn't even want to know how the spirit accomplished that.)

The spirit smirked.

(It made Ryou cringe.)

"You still belong to me, landlord. And I still have use for you."

That sent chills up Ryou's spine. It was one thing when the spirit was nothing but a voice in the back of his head. But now Ryou could see him. He was real. (Not just some bad dream that if Ryou tried hard enough, he'd wake up from.) The spirit was flesh and blood.

"I won't help you," Ryou said, trying to sound confident.

Both the spirit of the ring and the man in red snorted at that.

"You are going to do what apparently the King of Thieves cannot," the spirit, again, turned his frigid stare at the man in red. Seemingly, the 'King of Thieves'.

"I was doing fine before you showed up," growled the Thief King, crouching down as he did so.

"Clearly. That's why you have no items in your possession," the spirit of the ring said.

The King of Thieves launched himself at the spirit, who merely side stepped the impacted.

Ryou stared at of this unfolding, not knowing how he should react.

"As I was saying," the spirit said, glaring at the fallen thief and then returning his attention to Ryou, "You are to retrieve my items for me, from those pathetic 'friends' of yours."

"And if I don't?" Ryou clenched his fists.

"You will."

Ryou hated that voice. Confident, self assure. There was no doubt in the spirit's mind that Ryou would follow him.

"Enough of this!" the thief yelled, "Zorc must be awaken."

"Zorc?" Ryou asked. That name sounded so familiar.

(Oh, no…)

The spirit grinned, canines included.

"The God of Darkness," the spirit said and Ryou had never heard him sound more pleased.

(Ryou gulped.)

-0-

Night had fallen.

And Ryou still wasn't sure exactly what was going on. He'd picked up quite a few things though. Firstly, who the King of Thieves actually was. In between the insults traded between the thief and the spirit, Ryou deduced that they were the same of sorts. Or at least, some of the same soul. The spirit was the part of the thief's soul that was sealed into the ring and Ryou was what was left off the soul's reincarnation.

It didn't make much sense to him at all.

(Not to mention the fact that it would mean he and the spirit of the ring…were the same person…)

Their plan was pretty simple. Gather the millennium items, unleash Zorc. What still remained unclear (at least to Ryou) was how they were in ancient Egypt in the first place. The thief didn't know. The spirit of the ring wouldn't tell him.

Really, the only definite information he'd gotten (and the only information he actually believed) was the ruined village's name.

It was Kul Elna.

But even when Ryou gathered up the courage to ask about Kul Elna, he was meant with stony glares. It was touchy subject for both of them.

(Which was bizarre in of itself, because Ryou hadn't thought the spirit was capable of having a touchy subject.)

Everything was chaotic at best. But out of all of that, there was only one thing that truly frightened him.

He wasn't even fighting against them. Not actively.

Ryou justified it by telling himself that even if he fought, he'd lose. Both the thief and the spirit were far stronger than him.

(But he could try. He should try…)

It didn't matter. Even if the spirit now had the thief at his disposal, the spirit would lose.

Maybe not to Ryou. But to the Pharaoh. The spirit could never defeat the Pharaoh.

(Ryou took a small amount of smug satisfaction from that.)

In the distance, Ryou heard the thief and the spirit arguing. Again. Honestly, the entire day was spent with bickering about how the day should be spent.

Ryou sighed.

At least it kept them away from him.

Suddenly, they both strolled into the dark and ashy hut, both wearing identical scowls.

"Make sure he doesn't escape," the spirit told the thief, who then promptly replied with a few choice words.

The spirit rolled his eyes.

"Landlord!" he said, "Come here."

Ryou furrowed his brow, but obeyed nonetheless.

(He always obeyed the spirit.)

The spirit pulled Ryou close to him, by his collar.

"I'm allowing you a little freedom here, host. Do not make me regret my decision," he said disdainfully. Then he pushed Ryou to the ground and walked away.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Ryou said, ashamed at how scared his voice sound.

The spirit didn't answer.

"Where is he going?" Ryou asked, this time to the thief.

He scowled and turned away, choosing instead to stalk off into the night.

Ryou looked down at the ground, slightly hurt. The spirit of the ring was one thing, but the thief seemed different. He seemed human.

Disenchanted with the whole ordeal (the millennium ring, reincarnation, Egypt) Ryou slumped against the wall. He closed his eyes and prayed for sleep.

("Our son…our only son…")

Ryou's eyes snapped opened. He swore he'd just heard whispering. Softly, he walked to the door of the ruined hut. He looked both ways for signs of someone, but saw nothing.

Was he going crazy now, too?

Ryou took one last look at Kul Elna. In the moonlight, it seemed like it could have been a beautiful place once. But now, there was only half buildings and broken pottery.

He stepped out, searching for more. The thief was still no where in sight.

A burst of adrenaline flooded his veins and before Ryou knew it he was running. He ran faster than he ever had, even when the darkness had been chasing him…

Ryou didn't stop for even a second until Kul Elna was nothing but a bad memory in the distance.

He collapsed on his knees and buried his hands in the sand. Oh God, what had he done? The spirit had, in some twisted form, at least trusted him a bit just now. But now when the spirit caught him (and it was a when, not an if, he could never hide from the spirit) his fury would be unimaginable. Ryou shuddered at the memory of when he'd protect Yuugi during the Monster World game and caused the spirit to lose.

Ryou moaned. Even though the spirit was going to make him do despicable things, at least Ryou would have been able to do with his own hands. At least he would have some form of control. But now…nothing. It was too late to turn back.

(Had he really become so hopeless? So compliant with his role?)

Up ahead, Ryou heard footsteps. The spirit found him already?!

"Ba…Bakura?" said a bewildered voice.

Ryou glanced up. Instead of a mock reflection of himself, he saw a tanned Egyptian boy with lilac eyes. He was familiar…

"Malik Ishtar?"

Something dawned in Malik's eyes.

"Oh, you're not Bakura…you're his other," he said.

Ryou flinched.

He knew Malik had been entered in the Battle City tournament, and that he had once possessed an Egyptian God and the millennium rod. Ryou knew, but didn't remember. All of his Battle City memories were fragments and glimpses at best.

Ryou arose from the desert floor.

"Can you help me?" he asked, slowly, carefully. Ryou couldn't remember if Malik had been a good person or not.

Malik blinked and then said, "Oh. _Oh_. How long have you been wandering the desert?"

Ryou shrugged, "Maybe a few hours."

Malik fished something out of his pockets. It was a canteen.

"Here," he said, offering up the pouch, "drink this."

"Thank you," Ryou said sincerely and snatched the pouch up. It was the first drink he could recall having since he got here. Apparently the spirit and the thief did not need food and water like normal humans.

Malik grasped his arm awkwardly.

"Look, I know that in Battle City…" he trailed off.

"What about Battle City?" Ryou asked and cocked his head to the side.

Malik's eyes narrowed and then he shook his head.

"Nothing. Never mind. I have a small camp set up back there, if you want to spend the night with me."

"Really?" Ryou said shocked, "Alright. Thank you again, for so much…um, kindness."

Malik snorted. "No problem."

They walked in silence for quite a while, before Ryou saw a small fire in the distance. He sat on the sand near it and began the seemingly impossible task of warming himself up.

Before he managed to thank Malik again, Ryou was fast asleep.

-0-

Malik could not believe it. He really didn't remember. Though it was a long time ago since their last conversation in his soul and he had told Malik he'd forget…he really forgot.

And now he was sleeping. Passed out on the sand without any sort of explanation.

Malik tilted his head. He kinda looked like a kitten.

"Hey, Bakura," Malik said as he poked the sleeping boy. It felt weird calling him that. The half-insane, smirking, arrogant spirit of the ring was Bakura.

Bakura but not Bakura opened his eyes.

"Sorry…" he said groggily, "That was so rude of me."

Malik suppressed a laugh. The two Bakura's were both so different from each other.

"Hey…um," Malik tried to find a way to express his discomfort politely. He knew that both Bakuras didn't get along, to say the least.

_Ah, screw it_.

"Look. I know this might sound weird but calling you Bakura is bothering me. What's your first name?" Malik said bluntly, as always.

The white haired boy blinked in confusion.

Hesitantly he said, "My first name's Ryou."

Ryou. Now that fit much better.

"Can I call you that?" Malik asked. If only Ishizu could see him now, she'd be so impressed. Sometimes he wondered if she really believed that he was trying to make progress…but he was. Especially to Ryou, who he almost killed. And hadn't even cared at the time.

Ryou looked away and rubbed his arm.

"I guess," he said.

"Great," Malik said and gave a half-hearted smile.

An awkward silence ensued.

Malik realized this was going to be a long night.

-0-

The silence bothered Ryou to no end. He knew it bothered Malik too. Ryou was scared that maybe Malik would ask more questions. That name thing had been so…bizarre.

Finally, Ryou decided he needed to ask the questions first.

"So why are you here?" Ryou asked, not realizing how rude the question sounded until it was out.

Malik shrugged, "You're guess is as good as mine. I don't even remember what happened right before this."

Ryou let out a sigh of relief. He had just assumed he didn't remember because…well, he never remembered anything.

"Why did you decide to make camp here?"

(Ryou liked asking questions, it didn't leave any room for Malik to ask question about him.)

"I don't know," Malik grumbled, "It was close and had good resources. Why so many questions?"

"I was just wondering," Ryou said.

Silence spread between them yet again.

"So," Malik said awkwardly (it seemed like he was trying), "How have you been since Battle City?"

"Fine," Ryou replied mechanically, "And you?"

"Just dandy."

More silence besides the crackling of burning sticks.

"What's living in Egypt like?" Ryou inquired, desperate for some communication.

"You tell me," Malik said sardonically. "This is Egypt."

"Right," Ryou mumbled and stared at his feet.

Malik cringed. He hadn't meant to be so mean, but being nice was just so _hard_.

"It's…nice. Hot most of the time. Except at night. Obviously."

Great Ra, Malik thought bitterly, how much stupider could he sound?

"My father lives in Egypt," Ryou said, still keeping his eyes on the ground.

"Really?" Malik said and his eyes widened a little.

The white haired boy nodded, "He's an archeologist. He has been on a dig here since I moved to Domino."

(Ryou didn't know why he was telling Malik all this…it just seemed right.)

"Oh, well that's must be…interesting," Malik replied, not really knowing what to say. Ryou hadn't said anything bad, necessarily, but he still sounded so…sad.

"I guess," Ryou shrugged, "He was here when he sent me the millennium ring. As a gift."

Malik narrowed his eyes. Now that definitely sounded bitter.

"Do you wish he hadn't?" Malik probed, suddenly eager for answers.

"Hadn't what?" Ryou said and tilted his head to the side.

"Hadn't given you the ring."

"Of course," responsed Ryou, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "Don't you wish you had never even seen a millennium item?"

Malik thought about the rod. Remembered holding in his hands, feeling the cold gold and the power that would burn through his veins with each use. Remembered what he had been able to accomplish by using the rod's specialties. Remembered all he had done with the dagger hidden inside…

"You've got a point there," Malik said with a bitter chuckle.

Ryou smiled slightly.

"So," Malik said when realized now was his chance to ask the one question that had been bugging, "What were you running from?"

Ryou cringed.

Malik swore inwardly. He hadn't know his curiosity would totally hit a sore spot.

"You know the spirit of the ring…don't you?" Ryou asked. His brown eyes were foggy.

A chill ran up Malik's spine. Maybe Ryou did remember.

"Yeah," Malik admitted.

"He has his own body now," said Ryou.

"_What_?" Malik exclaimed. That millennium item obsessed prick had his own body now?

"But how?"

Ryou shrugged.

"I don't know. He just does. He doesn't have the millennium ring, either," said Ryou, so softly Malik could barely hear it.

"What?" Malik repeated, "How does that even make sense?"

"It doesn't," Ryou said, in a sickening familiar bitter tone.

"And you ran away from him because…" Malik said.

He never could quite comprehend why Ryou hated his darkness so much. It wasn't like Bakura was completely and utterly psychopathically insane like his darkness was. In fact, in a strange way it seemed like Bakura cared for Ryou. Yeah, he stabbed him in the arm, but he had been fully in control when that happened. Plus he took the hit for him in the duel with the Pharaoh…

Ryou looked up at Malik like he was insane.

"I…I mean…he's…" Ryou was speechless.

"He, he's planning something," Ryou said after a moment.

"Planning what?"

Ryou curled over.

"The end of the world," he said, "Eternal Darkness. The rise of the dark God Zorc."

"Oh," Malik said.

"Oh," Ryou said, again with that darker and deeper bitter voice.

"So what are you going to do stop him?" Malik questioned. Maybe he'd help. Maybe then Ishizu and Rishid could actually trust him again…

"Me?" Ryou asked bewildered, "What could I possibly do?"

Malik stared in horror. He'd given up so fast?

"What the hell kind of attitude is that?" Malik snapped, suddenly filled with rage. After all the fighting Malik had done against his own darkness…and all the fighting Malik had thought Ryou had done…he was just going to quit?

Ryou looked as if he'd just been slapped across the face.

"You have a duty!" Malik continued, "If you know his plan, you need to stop it. What's wrong with you? How can you quit so easily!?"

Ryou opened his mouth to say something, but Malik quickly cut him off.

"Whatever you say doesn't matter. We are going to go to sleep right now and when we wake up in the morning, we are going to think of a way to stop him."

A way to stop Bakura?

Malik smirked.

"Tomorrow we are going to find the Pharaoh."

Something clicked inside Ryou's brain. Duty. Yuugi…Yuugi was his friend and Ryou had a duty to protect him. Malik was right. He couldn't quit.

(Even if he failed, he had to _try_.)

"Right. The Pharaoh," Ryou said.

Malik was startled; he hadn't expected Ryou to agree with him so fast.

"Yeah. The Pharaoh. I mean, he can defeat anyone. It's sort of his thing," Malik said, partly bitter.

Ryou stared into the fire and hoped.

"What do you think will happen after the Pharaoh defeats the spirit of the ring?" Ryou asked, looking at Malik again.

(Ryou purposely avoid the word if. He had to be certain that the spirit of the ring would be defeated.)

"We will get to go back to the real world. He'll probably go to the afterlife or something."

"The real world?" Ryou inquired.

"Yeah, well I mean this is just a memory," Malik said and then he saw the look in Ryou's eyes.

"Oh," Malik said, "You don't know."

Ryou shook his head.

"Okay, basically, according to the scriptures, the Pharaoh sealed away himself and his memories in order to protect the world. Now he has to find them and I guess save the world. Again."

"So this is like a game?" Ryou said and pressed his lips together.

"I guess."

"So when the Pharaoh wins, he'll be released from the millennium puzzle?"

"I assume," Malik said, trying to hide his annoyance.

Ryou slumped over.

"What will happen to us?" Ryou asked, his eyes filled with hurt.

Malik was suddenly very uncomfortable.

"Well, what were you like before all this happened? Before the millennium ring?" Malik asked, trying to divert attention away from himself.

"I don't remember," Ryou admitted.

Silence came after that. Neither one could think of anything else to say after something like that.

They both drifted off into much needed sleep.

(Both had nightmares.)

-0-

Ryou awoke with the sun the next morning.

He was so thankfully for Malik's tirade. It had brought him back to his senses. Ryou would never let the spirit win. Not without a fight.

Malik awoke too. He seemed to enjoy the mornings because Ryou distinctively heard him whisper, "I love the sun."

They were to start their journey to the Pharaoh today. But, Ryou thought as he shook sand out of his hair, where was the Pharaoh?

"Malik?" Ryou asked.

"Yeah?" he said back.

"Do you know where the Pharaoh is at?"

"The palace," replied Malik.

"Where's that?" Ryou persisted.

"About a day's walk from that village up ahead."

Ryou's mouth made a small 'oh' sound.

"I went there an hour or so ago, while you were sleeping. Asked for directions."

Ryou looked away, "Why didn't you wake me up? I would have gone with you."

Malik sighed. How should he explain this?

"Okay," Malik said and pulled Ryou closer to him, "I needed to just blend in with the crowd. In order to do that I had to be very inconspicuous."

"I know," Ryou said, slightly offended by Malik's patronizing tone, "I can be inconspicuous."

(He was even better at being invisible, come to think of it…)

Malik snorted, "Ryou. You're hair is white."

Ryou tugged on his own hair shamefully.

"I mean, sure your hair is nice," Malik backtracked after seeing the look on Ryou's face, "But people in Egypt don't have white hair. Or skin for that matter."

Ryou nodded, "So what are we going to do?"

"Cover you up," Malik said with the ghost of smirk. He pulled from behind his back a pile of clothing.

"Malik, please don't tell me your stole this," said Ryou as Malik wrapped him in layer after layer of clothing.

"Fine," Malik said, "I won't."

Ryou cringed. He hated stealing.

(It reminded him of…)

"Relax, Ryou," Malik said, rolling his eyes, "This is just a memory. The people aren't real."

Ryou didn't bother to explain to Malik that it was the moral situation that bothered him and not the resources they were taking.

The white haired boy was literally covered from head to toe.

Malik seemed extremely proud of his work.

"Um, Malik?" Ryou said, "Isn't this a bit dangerous, won't I get too hot?"

"Don't worry," Malik responded, "I have water."

With that, they started their journey.

-0-

The Pharaoh's memory certainly did not have a good variation of scenery. Malik was sure he and Ryou had passed that sandy mountain looking thingy a thousand times.

He glared up at, focusing all his rage and frustration at the never changing rock. In the far corner, a trio of robed men on horses stared back at him.

Great. Now they were being followed. But who were they following, Malik thought with distaste, himself or Ryou?

Well, only one way to find out.

"Hey, Ryou," Malik said.

"Yes?" Ryou replied with that sleepy, soft voice of his.

"I'm going to go up ahead to left for a couple minutes. I'll catch up with you later."

"Why?" Ryou questioned and titled his head.

Malik looked at Ryou up and down. He seemed so innocent and naïve, like a squishy marshmallow.

"Because you're annoying me," Malik finally said, not wanting to bother with explaining everything just yet.

"Oh," Ryou said, obviously hurt, "Well, um, bye then. See you soon?"

Malik clutched his arm absently, "Yeah. Right."

Wow. And he had thought working with Bakura had been tense.

Malik ran off far away from the white haired boy, all the while never taking his eyes off those cloaked creeps.

-0-

Ryou always felt like he was being watched.

Even before this.

He had grown used to it, (Ryou had the uncanny knack for adapting to any situation) and simply chalked it up to the spirit of the ring. Ryou knew on some level that the spirit of the ring was always watching him, making sure he never said the wrong thing, waiting for a chance to hurt Yuugi…

But this feeling was different. When the spirit watched it felt like being wrapped in darkness (and, on some level, he still felt this, which unnerved Ryou even more). But this feeling was much more like people were staring at him.

It wasn't much better.

So, when Malik ran back to Ryou after being gone for ten minutes at the most, Ryou wasn't really surprised at what he heard.

"Someone's stalking you," Malik said dryly.

"Can you see who it is?" Ryou asked.

"Yeah. Three freaky looking dudes with black cloaks on horses."

Black coats? Ryou broke out into a cold sweat.

"Do they have red eyes?"

Malik paused, "I think so. I can't really see. Wait - do you know who they are?"

"Kind of," Ryou admitted as he tried to mentally assure himself that there was no way that the Thief King was with them. He would have sensed it.

"What do you mean 'kind of'?" Malik sneered, "Who are they?"

"Well," Ryou paused, trying to think of a way to explain it. "I think they are the Thief King's…um…henchmen, I guess?"

Malik look blankly at Ryou and then laughed.

"Ha!" Malik said, "I knew they had something to do with him! Ra, he was always weirdly protective of you."

Ryou blinked, "What?"

Malik mirrored Ryou's inquisitive look. "You mean you couldn't tell?"

"What are you talking about?" Ryou asked.

"Your other. He has…like a soft side for you or something."

Ryou's mouth dropped open. The spirit of the ring having a soft side for him? _What?!_ The spirit stole his friends' souls and sealed them into cursed figurines. The spirit (when he did talk to Ryou, which was rarely) only mocked him. He would regularly rob Ryou of control of his body for weeks at a time…

(And of course, there was the constant oppression of his soul room and the draining of Ryou's memories…)

Since when would that be considered a soft side?

All of Ryou's reasons were true, but he only managed to say, "He hates me."

Malik shook his head.

"What planet are you living on?" he scolded, "When we were working together he would always throw a hissy fit when I entered you mind - he didn't even let me meet you! And honestly Ryou even you aren't that thick not to notice. I mean I can still remember perfectly the absolutely brilliant plan I had to assure his victory against the Pharaoh in Battle City and he threw it away - just because you might get hurt."

Ryou fell quiet, processing what Malik had just said.

"You…" he said slowly, glaring at the ground, "Entered my mind? You worked with him?"

(Ryou was shaking.)

Malik frowned, "Well…yeah…didn't you know? All of Yuugi's other friends knew."

Ryou cringed.

"Hey, Ryou. I'm…I'm…I'm sorry, okay, I thought you knew. I thought it was just water under the bridge…" Malik sputtered.

"No one ever told me," Ryou whispered, nearly inaudible. His eyes were blank.

"Hey, look it's not your fault that your other half suppressed your memory -" Malik was cut off by Ryou's smooth soft voice.

He looked up at Malik with pleading eyes.

"How much more do I not remember about my own life?" he asked and then with a sick, plunging feeling in his stomach, realizing that this was what the Pharaoh must always feel like.

Malik didn't know what to say.

"It doesn't matter anyway," Ryou said bitterly, "Let's just go find the Pharaoh."

-0-

"Malik?" Ryou said softly, gazing up at the sky with awe.

"What?" Malik sneered back as he glared at his feet, the sun finally wearing down on his nerves.

"I think I found the palace."

"What!" Malik's head snapped up, "Oh."

"Yeah," said Ryou as he stared.

Never in his life had Ryou even imagined something close to the Palace's magnificence. It was so tall; it seemed to touch the sky. The rocks were covered with gold and in the midday sun, the walls shimmered so brightly. Even the dirty, brown village that sprawled around the Palace did not make it any less great.

Ryou stuffed his hair further down into the cloak.

"Ready?" He asked Malik.

Malik nodded and they headed into the village.

-0-

Walking straight through the village to the Palace was definitely interesting. It was crowded and shouting everywhere, but everyone seemed to be happy.

But the best thing was that no one noticed them at all.

Ryou did his best to keep his head down and cover every inch of skin imaginable. It worked. People passed by the two of without a second glance. In a matter of minutes they'd be at the Palace and be able to tell the Pharaoh everything. Ryou wasn't naïve, like everyone seemed to believe (mostly because of the ways he lied to them). He knew that he didn't stand a chance against the spirit of the ring. Only the Pharaoh could defeat him.

Him. It was more appropriate. Saying him implied that the spirit of the ring was human, and not just the manifestation of a thousand nightmares…

Ryou shook his head. He had to stop being afraid. It was the fear in him that made Ryou such a good host to a thing like the spirit of the ring. The fear was the reason why the spirit of ring thought Ryou would just bend down to his will, just become another pawn in this game.

Well, Ryou refused.

He was sick of being afraid.

Ryou looked up to the sky and nearly gasped. The Palace was taller than he'd thought.

"Malik," said Ryou nervously, "How are we to get in?"

The lilac eyed boy frowned.

"I guess," Malik said, "we start looking for an entrance."

Ryou gave him a look and Malik glared at him back.

"You've got any other plans? It's not like they are just going to let us see the Pharaoh," he snarled.

Ryou sighed. He didn't have any plans.

"Should we split up?"

"No," Malik responded, "If we get caught it will be easier to escape if both of our together."

Ryou didn't ask anymore questions, instead simply followed Malik as he ran off.

-0-

For being the place where the king of Egyptian lived, there was a surprising lack of guards. Ryou and Malik only had to duck behind a bush once or twice while they searched the perimeter, looking for an opening.

A small glow caught Ryou's eye. It was a small hole.

"Malik," Ryou whispered, "Malik! Look!"

The boy in questioned looked.

"Do you think we can fit through that?" questioned Ryou.

Malik pursued his lips, "Maybe. Kinda looks like it's our only option."

Ryou stepped out from the shadows they had been hiding in to take a closer look. The gap was only mildly wide, maybe just maybe big enough for them to slip through…but it would be a very tight fit.

"Hey! Stop right there!" A voice low and deep called out, followed by the sound of footsteps.

_Oh, no._

(Behind him Ryou heard Malik curse under his breath.)

Three bulky and muscular guards came running. All armed with spears.

Ryou gulped. He had never been in a fight. Even when his body had, the spirit of the ring would just suppress his consciousness.

Malik shouted words at him, but none of them made any sense to Ryou. His whole head was going fuzzy…

The three guards stormed near him, pointing their spears at his chest.

"What are you doing here?" The middle one asked, jabbing his spear at Ryou accusingly.

Ryou couldn't answer. His throat was glued shut.

The middle guard motion to the other two and then said, "Maybe a night in the dungeons will teach him some respect."

Ryou's eyes widen. Dungeons. An icy cold wave of hatred washed over him.

(He began to shake…)

All of three of them closed in of Ryou. He felt something beating in his chest. Like, like…he couldn't even…his mind was so fuzzy…

The middle one lunged at him.

"Ryou! Watch out!" Malik screamed, finally coming out from hiding.

Ryou easily sidestepped the enormous guard. The guard stumbled and then all three glared at him.

"Get him!" the one on the ground called out to the others. Both guards nodded and ran out him.

Ryou smirked.

He dodged effortlessly. The obvious commander of the two other guards arose from the ground. He launched himself at Ryou.

The white-haired boy ducked down and snatched his spear from him. He plunged the blunt side square into the man's chest. The guard fell to the floor unconscious.

This only enraged the other two guards, instead of warning them. Both at once came charging at Ryou. Without breaking a sweat he blocked all of their attacks and both were on the ground in mere seconds.

An absolutely perfect warmth filled Ryou's body. He hadn't felt this happy since…since…his thoughts were all so foggy and unreachable…

The spear dropped from Ryou's hand.

(And he suppressed the urge to vomit.)

Malik walked towards him.

"Well that," He looked at three unconscious guards with a faint trace of a smirk, "was surprisingly badass."

Ryou blushed, "I don't know where that came from…"

Malik shrugged. "Who cares? Now come on, let's go find the Pharaoh."

"Yeah," Ryou nodded and pushed that queasy feeling down deeper.

"Fighters first," Malik said as he motioned to the hole in the wall.

Ryou gave Malik an uneasy look, but then slipped through the hole with surprising simplicity. As he did so, he couldn't but hope that whatever had just happened would never repeat itself.

It was worse than when the ring spirit took over his body.

(Because whatever had just happened had been him. Completely, fully, one hundred percent him.)

-0-

The hole, miraculously enough, lead to an empty hallway. Instead of say, the dungeons or the Pharaoh's bedroom or any of the numerous possibilities that had ran through Ryou's mind just as he slipped in.

Malik had a bit more trouble, but nevertheless he managed to slide in just fine.

"Which way do we go?" Ryou whispering, looking around for any guards coming.

"How should I know?" Malik hissed back in a low voice.

"I thought you knew stuff like this. Aren't you a tomb-keeper?"

"Yeah. In the present!"

Just then, footsteps echoed down the hall.

"Hide!" Malik called as he pulled Ryou by the collar and behind a large vase.

Peeking around the edges, Ryou could make out five figures. Two voluptuous women draped in lavender scarves and three young boys carrying plates of food.

Next to him, Malik's stomach grumbled.

All five walked passed both Malik and Ryou without so much as a second glance. Thank goodness.

"I'm going to go out on a limb here," Malik said once they were out of sight, "but I think they are heading to the throne room."

"Right, let's go," Ryou said as he got up.

Following that group was wonderfully easy. They chatted a lot, giving good cover for whenever Ryou would accidentally trip over something.

"I hope you're memorizing these halls," Malik murmured.

"I am."

That was truth. The spirit of the ring had taught him many things (as disturbing as that was) and one of them was to be alert. Always. It was only a matter of time before you needed to escape.

They turned a right and music flooded the halls. The throne room must be close.

(Ryou felt sick. Deep down his guts were spilling out.)

Amazingly, there were no guards protecting the doors to the throne room. One of the dancers opened the door herself.

Malik gave Ryou a look, motioning for him to sneak into the room with the small group.

Reluctantly, the brown eyed boy slipped in as the door closed. On the other side, Ryou was greeted by seven glaring faces. And only one of them was the Pharaoh.

He looked exactly like Yuugi, only with tanner skin and more gold jewelry. That eased Ryou's anxiety just a bit.

Yuugi-kun.

(If he was to be honest with himself that was the real reason he was doing all this. Not to help the Pharaoh. Not to spite the spirit of the ring. No. All he wanted was to protect Yuugi.)

"Who are these intruders?" growled a vaguely familiar voice.

The owner was taller, angular man. He stood out from the other six figures because he was the only one wearing blue.

And he looked…

Ryou turned to Malik and blinked, "Is that Seto Kaiba?"

Malik didn't responded. He was too busy gawking at the only female and the one wearing the millennium necklace.

"Is that," Malik said aghast, "Ishizu?!"

"Well, Mahaado?" the Kaiba doppelganger hissed at another man.

The man in question turned to the Pharaoh.

"Shall we dispose of them, my league?" Mahaado asked.

Ryou's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. Dispose…?

The Pharaoh gazed at Ryou with cold, unforgiving violet red eyes. (So unlike Yuugi's.)

"Not yet," he ordered.

Ryou frowned. Not yet? What did that mean? Ryou glanced over at Malik, who was wearing the same look of offense.

"Um, hi," Ryou said softly, realizing that if he didn't say something fast the Pharaoh was going to send them to the dungeons.

All six figures glowered at them.

Ryou was at an absolute loss of words. How did he describe his situation – to a crowd of strangers no less?

_Well you see the spirit of the millennium ring – you know the guy who is always taking over my body and trying to steal your puzzle? He's at the whole collected all items and destroy the world thing again. Yeah well his previous incarnation kidnapped me in the desert and they both expected me to help them unleash the God of Darkness to destroy the world. But I didn't want…to um, destroy the world so I ran away and came here. So that you would, you know, save the world._

Even to him, that sounded completely crazy.

"This is ridiculous," the Egyptian Kaiba muttered under his breath, "Guards, seize them!"

"Stop!" the Pharaoh commanded.

"Ryou!" Malik snapped, "Tell him!"

"What do I say?"

Malik muttered a few curses words under his breath.

"Listen," he told the Pharaoh, "Egypt is in danger."

"What?" cried all seven of them at once.

"Danger? From who?" Mahaado said suspiciously.

Malik gestured to Ryou, "Him. Kind of."

Ryou glared.

"Not me," he said indigently, "_Him_."

The Pharaoh's eyes sparked. Thank goodness, he knew who Ryou was talking about.

"Yeah…it's um…complicated," Ryou started.

"Then explained," Kaiba but not Kaiba said, rolling his eyes.

Malik glared at him on behave of Ryou.

"He told me his plan," Ryou said, focusing all his energy into the Pharaoh, "He wants to resurrect the god of darkness – Zorc."

The Ishizu look alike gasped.

Kaiba look alike was not so easily impressed.

"Then why are you here?" He asked, looking at Malik.

Malik folded his arms, "Because without me Ryou would have ended died, kidnapped or raped."

Ryou grimaced.

"No offense," Malik said at the sight of Ryou's face.

"Bakura?" the Pharaoh said. Ryou looked up. His stare was hard and Ryou could see all the doubts in it.

(Ryou couldn't blame him, after all the things his other had done. Plus, Yuugi wasn't with him. He didn't know that for sure, but he had a feeling.)

"Look I know this seems odd," Ryou said.

Kaiba snorted.

"But he's more dangerous than ever know," Ryou paused, searching for the right words, "He has a new pawn."

When no one else said anything, Ryou took that as a signal to keep on.

"I think he's going after Yuugi first."

The Pharaoh's eyes went wide.

"That's why when he brought everyone here – he scattered us. He knows that separating you two makes you weaker."

"My Pharaoh," Mahaado said, "Who is he talking about?"

The Pharaoh brushed him off.

"I came here – ," Ryou was cut off by a coughing noise.

Malik stared at him.

"We came here," Ryou rephrased, "to help you. I don't want him to win."

The Pharaoh relaxed slightly, but only just.

The women who bore an uncanny resemblance to Ishizu closed her eyes and hovered her hands around the millennium necklace.

"My king," she said, "I sense great darkness in front of us."

"Is she," Malik said with horror, "talking about us?"

As if on cue, all of the items began to glow. An old man had the millennium eye installed, a bald man had the millennium key and another man with longer hair held the millennium scale. Obviously, the women had the millennium necklace and the Pharaoh had the puzzle. But Ryou hadn't expected was for the Kaiba look alike to pull out the millennium rod.

"The rod!" Malik exclaimed as his eyes narrowed.

On Mahaado's chest was the millennium ring.

"The ring…" Ryou trailed off, taking a step back.

Something ignited in Ryou's veins. Every inch of his body tingled and pricked and screamed at him to run ("Pointless, my dear landlord. The ring always comes back to its host.") The ring only brought trouble. The ring was nothing but evil.

How could the Pharaoh allow this man to use it?

All of the six guardians stepped closer to them, millennium items blazing brightly.

"Keep him away from me," Ryou muttered and glared at Mahaado.

Malik did nothing but glowered all of the priests. Especially the Ishizu look alike.

Ryou began to feel that queasy sensation in his stomach again and cloud seemed to drift over his eyes. The feeling was so familiar…he had just experienced it with those guards…hadn't he?

The white haired boy took another step back.

"Malik," he pleaded, as if the Egyptian boy could help him.

"Get away from us," snarled Malik, taking a step forward. He was daring the Pharaoh's priests to do something.

Not the smartest plan Malik's had.

"We are only going to see the darkness in your hearts," said the bold man, holding up the millennium scales, "if you are true then you should have no problems with it."

All the other priests nodded in agreement and a pulse of gold energy ran through the items.

Malik laughed loud, bitterly and slightly unhinged.

"Ha! In case you don't recall Pharaoh," he sneered, "The rod used to be mine. I remember what it does. And there is no way I'm letting that thing into my soul!"

Ryou gave a curt nod in agreement.

"I don't want that ring anywhere near me."

"Fine," said the Kaiba look alike dryly, "It'll be much easier for us just to lock you up in the dungeons anyway."

Ryou flinched.

"Unless," Kaiba looked up to the Pharaoh on his throne, "You have objections, my king."

The Pharaoh looked away and refused to look either Ryou or Malik in their eyes.

"You don't," Ryou's voice faltered, "believe us."

Malik's rage twisted his face into something grotesque. Just when he'd though it was safe to trust the Pharaoh…

Ryou was taking it much worse.

"But I'm not," he said as his shoulders slumped, "I'm not lying…"

(_For once I'm telling the truth. Here I am, this is all of me…this is all I can offer…can't you believe me? Please, I'm here – I'm right here! I know what he's done but…I'm not him! I'm not_.)

"I just don't want that," he stole a glance at the ring, "in my soul again…"

Malik clenched his fists, challenging the Pharaoh to something. But what?

"Guards!" called Egyptian Kaiba and five guards came out from the shadows. They were identical to the ones Ryou knocked earlier.

Oh no…that fuzzy feeling was coming back…

Ryou closed his eyes, trying to will himself to snap out of it. He rocked back and further, starting to feel very dizzy. Like the whole was foggy.

"Ryou," Malik whispered as the guards closed in on them.

The boy in question heard him, but just barely. Malik's voice seemed to be calling him from inside a tunnel, so far away…covered in mist…

As the Pharaoh said nothing, the guards closed in on him.

"I think if there ever was a time a to retreat, now was it," Malik said, tugging on the sleeve of Ryou's shirt.

Ryou paid him no heed. He was shaking.

("What's wrong, host, don't you remember?")

One guard with hazel eyes lunged at Malik.

He sidestepped and managed to miss the spear.

The guard was not so lucky.

Ryou pulled him by his hair and threw him to the floor. With a demented and manic glee in his eyes, Ryou stomped in his chest. The other guards responded faster than the Pharaoh and his priests. They rushed to their fallen comrade's side. All of them at once trying to stab Ryou in his back.

A small smirk revealed itself on Ryou's face.

He snatched the spear from the hazel eyed guard's unconscious hands. Two guards in unison charged at him. Ryou swung and sliced one of the guard's face. A thin trail of blood cascaded down. The guard looked up with raging eyes and with new found ferocity ran at Ryou.

He wasn't intimated. When the guard was a foot a away, Ryou swiftly avoid his blow and then with all his force prodded the guard into the chest. His body made a loud thud as it hit the floor.

The last three guards left all decided this was there opportunity to attack. With no rhyme or calculation they whirled their spears around, trying to hit Ryou. It was almost boring, it was so easy. Within seconds they were all unconscious on the Palace floor.

Ryou's eyes narrowed. He ready his spear for plunging it through all five of those guards chest.

Malik, who had been more than happy to allow Ryou to wipe the floor with the Pharaoh's guards, stared in horror.

"Ryou? Ryou stop!" Malik launched himself at the boy and wrapped his arms around him.

Ryou's posture did not alter.

"What the hell are you doing?" Malik screamed.

Ryou paused. "They don't deserve to live."

"Since when did _Ryou Bakura_ become the boy to judge that?" Malik hissed, clinging on to Ryou's chest tighter.

Ryou faltered.

The Kaiba twin looked at the Pharaoh. He nodded.

All seven of the millennium items glowed.

"Okay!" Malik said, still not letting go of Ryou's waist, "I'm only going to let you go if you promise not to do something you'll regret."

Ryou's posture collapsed. Malik's voice no longer seemed so far away, and the world was clear and crisp.

(But would he…would he have really regretted killing those guards?)

One of the Pharaoh's priest raised their millennium item and in a split second Ryou and Malik were out of the throne room.

It was a good thing they were both highly accomplished runners.

-0-

One of the gods themselves must have a special place in its heart for Ryou and Malik, because there was no way they should be free. Much less alive.

After the spectacular failure at the Palace, both Ryou and Malik knew it was much to dangerous to hide in the village. So they hid the desert.

Which, obviously, really sucked.

Neither of them said much. Ryou was too busy moping about what had happened with the Pharaoh's guards. Which, Malik kinda didn't blame him for - that was really bizarre - but still. It wasn't like he had actually killed anyone.

Malik, on the other hand, was moping about a much more reasonable topic. The lying, back stabbing, snake of an evil Pharaoh. He, Malik was doing a good deed, trying to help the Pharaoh get a one up on Bakura. And he'd never hated Bakura like he did the Pharaoh, so that made it that much better of a good deed! But that stupid, useless Pharaoh didn't believe him.

And that woman, who looked just like Ishizu, didn't believe him either…

Malik, for about the fiftieth time, grumbled under his breath.

Ryou finally brushed his white bangs out of his face.

"When need a new plan," he said, voice filled with determination.

Malik stared, "Plan. For what?"

"For stopping the spirit of the ring. For helping the Pharaoh save the world."

"Why would should we help the Pharaoh?" Malik hissed, "He was going to let become prisoners. Or be killed!"

Ryou furrowed his brow; he didn't understand.

"Because it's the right thing to do, Malik. It doesn't matter if the Pharaoh doesn't believe us, we still have to help him," Ryou said.

"You're unbelievable."

But deep down, Malik knew that Ryou was right.

Which made him only hate the Pharaoh more.

-0-

Ryou and Malik sat in the sand and tried to figure out a plausible plan.

"Who says we need the Pharaoh to stop your other?" said Malik.

"Wasn't that your idea?" Ryou asked.

Malik scowled.

"Yeah, well that was before, this is now," he said. It's no use trying to convince Ishizu now…even her reincarnation hates me…

"Besides," Malik sneered, "We know his plan. We could stop him ourselves."

Ryou gawked. That was just out of the question. Not only was the spirit even more powerful not that he wasn't trapped in the ring - but there was also the thief. Plus, every time Ryou even dared to think about going against the spirit of the ring…well…

"How?" Ryou said, trying to rationalize his fear, "We don't have any powers. Neither of us have items - how are we going to go up against him?"

Malik pulled his lips together, "If you could go all psycho on him like you did the guards then I'm sure we stand a chance."

Ryou blanched.

"I'm just kidding," Malik said, rolling his eyes.

"We really need a plan," Ryou moaned and put his face in his hands. The more time they wasted sitting here talking about a plan, the stronger the spirit of the ring became.

"Do you hear that?" Malik asked.

"Hear what?"

"Shh! Listen."

Ryou did. It sounded like footsteps and…arguing?

"There are more important things than your stomach, Jounouchi!" said a scolding voice.

"Anzu!" Ryou exclaimed, standing up. To his joy, in the distance, he saw four figures walking towards. A girl with short brown hair reprimanding a taller boy with blonde hair. To their left a boy with brown hair smiled. In the center of the chaos stood a short boy with spiky hair.

Yuugi.

"Yuugi-kun!" shouted Ryou, running towards them, "Yuugi, over here!"

The violet eyed boy blinked and then smiled.

"Bakura-kun! What are you doing here?" he asked and all his friends nodded in agreement.

Ryou was so happy he didn't know what to say.

"We were trying to speak to the Pharaoh," said Malik's voice, emerging from behind Ryou.

"Oh hey Malik," Yuugi said, "You're here too?"

"Yeah."

"Can either of you two us what exactly is going on?" Honda said.

Both Ryou and Malik shook their heads.

"I can't remember anything except waking up here," Ryou said apologetically.

"Same."

"Yeah," Yuugi said, "None of us can remember how we got here either…wait, did you guys say you went to see the Pharaoh?"

Ryou and Malik looked away, but nodded anyway.

"So he's really here? The other me? Did he get his memories back? Does he know his name?" Yuugi asked, bombarding them with questions.

"Well, um, the thing is Yuugi…" Ryou started, trying to find a way to explain.

"He kicked us out." Malik said bluntly.

"What?" asked Yuugi, with Honda, Jou and Anzu's facing wearing the same look of bewilderment.

"We walked through miles of desert, we were attacked by palace guards, snuck in to the most heavily protected place in Egypt all so that we could help your precious Pharaoh and then he didn't believe us and had his guard attack us. Again," Malik seethed.

"The other me wouldn't do something like that," Yuugi insisted.

"Well, without you he's just as cruel as he was three thousand years ago," Malik said, not even bothering with his façade of a nice guy. He was pissed and he had every right to use sarcasm.

Ryou sighed. Malik was not helping there case.

"It's a bit more complicated than that," added Ryou, after looking at all of Yuugi's friend's faces, "You see he had these…priests with him and they weren't so fond of us."

"Well then it looks like there is only one thing to do," said Jou, "we're going have to make him remember who his real friends are!"

"Wait, what?" cried out Malik. But it was too late, all four of them were already running in the direction of the palace.

"Come on Bakura-kun!" Yuugi called back, "We need you."

Ryou smiled and started running too.

Malik grabbed on his arm.

"You're not really going to back there are you?" he asked.

"Of course I am. I told, I'm going to the help the Pharaoh."

Malik stared into Ryou's eyes for a long moment and then let him go.

"Fine. But I swear if I get killed because of this…"

-0-

Malik was not at all enjoying these group field trip. For numerous reasons, but most of them boiled down to that 'stupid, backstabbing Pharaoh'.

In a way, Malik was aware that it was very hypocritical to be angry with the Pharaoh for not trusting. For Ra's sake, he spent pretty much all of Battle City trying to kill him. But he was furious and personally didn't care if it made him a hypocritical.

So while all of Yuugi and his friends made pleasant small talk, Malik just stayed to the said and pouted.

He never said one word. Even Ryou had a couple of sentences with of conversation.

"Look!" said Anzu, pointing up to the sky.

Malik rolled his eyes. Stupid Palace.

"How do we get in?" said Yuugi, a bit crestfallen.

"It hasn't even been a day yet," Ryou said, "I think that hole might still be there."

"Hole?" asked the four of them.

"It'll be a tight fit," Ryou warned, "but if Malik and I managed, I think you guys can too."

"Well what are we doing just standing here?" Honda urged, "Let's go!"

And they all took off running again. Except Malik who walked, glaring at their backs the entire time.

Not surprisingly, there were no guards patrolling the hole in the many walls of the palace.

Jou blanched as he looked at how small the hole really was.

"I guess I'll go first," Ryou said and slipped into the hole.

Honda followed, then Jou and then Anzu.

"You alright?" Yuugi asked at Malik.

"Fine. Sorry if I don't seem that way, it's just usually I avoid going back to the place I just ran for my life from," Malik snorted.

Yuugi gave a small smile.

"I'm sure once we talk to the Pharaoh everything will work itself out."

And then Yuugi slid into the hole.

Ra. That kid was always an optimist. Reminded him of Ryou.

Malik, cursing under his breath, was the last to enter the hole.

The hallway looked exactly the same as it had earlier. There were beautiful hand crafted vases everywhere, along with a thin line of gold on the walls.

"This way!" said Ryou and headed up the hall.

Yuugi quickly ran to the white haired boy's side. Malik, again, sulked at the back.

He really didn't want to see that throne room again. Or that stupid Ishizu. Or Kaiba holding his rod.

Come to think of it, he really didn't want to see Ryou go berserk again. Even if it did look really awesome…there was something in Ryou's eyes when it happened.

Sooner than Malik cared for, they were at the doors to the throne room.

Ryou stopped.

"I think you better go in first, Yuugi," he said.

Yuugi pushed the doors open.

Déjà vu.

Though there was two major differences, though. Instead of six priests, there was only four. The one with the millennium key and the man with who held the scale were missing. However, the one that looked like his sister was still there, face cold and indifferent. And the Pharaoh was sitting on his throne, not a care in the world.

Malik glared at all of them and refused to come in. Ryou stayed behind as well.

"You could at least try to be nicer to them," Ryou said as he came closer to Malik.

"Sorry I can't be as good of a liar as you," Malik countered.

Ryou didn't say anything after that. The comment must have run deeper than he'd expected.

Up ahead of them, Malik had the perfect view of the scene before him.

"My king do you know these -," but the Kaiba double was cut off.

"Yuugi!" The Pharaoh shouted and actually got of his throne. At that moment Malik's jaw must have dropped.

He looked to all his friends.

"How did you all get here? Why are you here?" the Pharaoh questioned.

Malik cringed, dread consumed him. Yuugi better not…

"Thanks to Ryou and Malik," Yuugi said and pointed to them.

Malik cursed loudly.

(Ryou sulked into the shadows.)

"Them again?" said the Kaiba look alike, "Guards!"

"Wait! No! Stop!" the Pharaoh said as he ran to Yuugi, "These are my friends.

All of the priests relaxed.

Malik snorted. The pharaoh always had a change off heart when Yuugi was around.

The Pharaoh turned to Yuugi. They gazed into each other's for only a second before Yuugi through himself into the King of Egypt's arms.

"I missed you so much," Yuugi whispered.

The Pharaoh closed his eyes and smiled.

It was so sweet, Ryou thought to himself. And though he should be happy about the reunion between two close friends, a knot formed in his stomach.

(He was jealous, beyond jealous…he had never been like that with _him_…)

BOOM!

A thunderous sound swept over the whole chamber. Then, the softer sound of footsteps followed.

Ryou's fist clenched in fear. He knew.

('Speak of the devil and he doth appear.')

The booming noise was overshadowed by a deep, roaring laughter. Not even a speck of sanity lied within it.

The King of Thieves emerged from the shadows, a malicious grin stretched ear to ear. He was clad in his signature crimson robe, gold jewelry piled excessively on his body. Ryou knew it was just to spite the Pharaoh.

"Is this intruder another friend of yours, my king?" said the holder of the millennium rod. His steely blue eyes glared at thief.

"No," growled the Pharaoh as stepped in front of Yuugi.

"Is that you, Ryou?" Malik asked.

Ryou shook his head. "The spirit of the millennium ring. When he was human."

Malik pressed his lips together into a firm line. Ryou really needed to get over his identity issues.

"So how bad are we talking here?" said Malik.

The five remaining priests closed in on the thief, trapping him in a circle. His grey white bangs cast a shadow on his eyes. He smirked.

(Ryou's skin prickled.)

"Very bad."

"Pharaoh! We finally meet!" the thief grinned, he seemed genuinely amused.

"We will not allow you to even close to the Pharaoh!" said the Ishizu twin.

"Isis," the Pharaoh whispered, touched by her dedication.

The thief threw his head back and cackled.

"Just as your _friends_," he sneered the last word with intensity, "were not going to allow me to enter the Palace?"

With deep satisfaction burning in the thief's eyes, he pulled out a golden, key-shaped item and a golden scale.

"The millennium key! The millennium scale!" the whole room gasped.

"Thief!" cried Kaiba looking one, "You will pay for disrespecting Egypt."

The smirk was carved into the thief's face, but there was no more amusement. His eyes were cold.

"The King of Thieves," he said softly, bowing his head, "And I have come to take back what's mine."

From his downcast face, the thief bared his fangs.

The prickling sensation went away. Instead, every inch of Ryou's skin was being stabbed.

"Yuugi! Run!" he cried and then added, "Pharaoh, don't let him get the items!"

The thief's eyes turned to him.

(Ryou all at once realized his mistake.)

"_You_," the thief snarled.

Ryou took a step back, resisting the urge to flee himself.

No. He couldn't. Malik had been right that night. Ryou had to stop giving up so easily. He had to try.

"I'm not afraid of you," Ryou muttered under his breath, "Either of you."

The wearer of the millennium stepped forward.

"This is my fault, Pharaoh. I've failed at protecting the Palace. I shall deal with intruder alone," he said.

"Mahaado, no!" Isis said as she grabbed onto his hand. He shook it off.

"You will not harm the Pharaoh," he said, voice radiating determination. The tassels of the ring stood straight out.

The thief cocked his brow, "Oh? You think you can defeat me on your own?"

He laughed.

"Just try."

The millennium exploded with light and then the thief disappeared.

"Where did he go?" Malik said.

The stabbing did not cease for Ryou.

"Nowhere," replied Ryou as looked frantically for the signs of the thief, "He's still here."

Everyone else who knew the key's special ability was no glancing over their shoulder every second. The Pharaoh moved closer to Yuugi.

Mahaado stood perfectly still as the tassels on the ring spun around erratically.

Without warning, Mahaado was sent flying into the wall. His body made a sickening crack sound as he fell to the ground. He wiped the blood from his mouth when another invisible blow took him.

The thief, slowly like clearing fog, appeared.

"I warned you," the thief said with a smirk. He ripped the ring from the unconscious Mahaado.

Malik gasped slightly. He just took the ring without any sort of duel?

"Attack!" cried the Pharaoh.

Ryou blanched. He hoped that the rulers of Egypt would have at least some tactical abilities.

The thief gave him a backwards glance at the Pharaoh and then to Ryou.

(Ryou couldn't breath.)

"Another day," he said darkly and then whistled. A horse burst through the doors and the thief jumped on it as it was moving. With lightning fast speed he galloped toward Ryou, as the remaining priests struggled to muster an attack.

Ryou knew it was coming.

He pushed Malik out of the way (just in case, he could never tell who and who wasn't important to them).

The thief pulled Ryou by his shirt and swung the smaller boy onto the horse.

Then the where gone.

Malik got up, his head dizzy from the fall.

"Ryou!" he shouted.

-0-

Long stretches of silence spread, like the desert over Egypt, as everyone collected themselves.

Then, Jou bluntly stated, "That sucked."

Everyone nodded except Malik. He was too furious to even move.

After all that, after all they'd been through, after Ryou had sat there and told them it was their duty to stop Bakura - he had just let that crazy theft kidnap him?

He just gave up!

Malik was livid. He knew that any second now he snapped and tried hopeless to calm himself down. It was pointless, unless he had someone else to blame.

The lilac eyed boy turned to the priests, who rightfully looked ashamed of themselves.

"What in Ra's name was that?" Malik hissed.

The Kaiba priest glared at him. "What do you mean?"

"What do I mean?" Malik exclaimed, "You just let one guy - one lone person who at the start of today had no items - totally kick your guys asses! And steal three of the millennium items! He even kidnapped Ryou and all you three did was stare and gasp as that one guy with the ring was attacked. Aren't you suppose to chosen priests? Oh, and I may be going out on a limb here - but aren't you suppose to be actually effective?! It was bad enough when you did nothing while Ryou and me were here earlier - but when evil is staring you right in your faces you still do nothing! What's wrong with you all?"

Malik took a breath.

Everyone stared at him, wide eyed.

Then, Anzu said, "I agree with Malik."

Wow. He wasn't expecting that.

"Me too," Jou said.

Honda shook his head in agreement.

Yuugi looked uncomfortable, but then he turned to the Pharaoh.

"We've got to save Ryou and get back the items," he said, eyes sparkling with worry.

The Pharaoh nodded.

"What happened today must never happen again," he said severely.

The three remaining priests bowed their hands.

"But now, we must find out where that thief has gone."

-0-

The only priestess, Isis, concentrated on the millennium necklace.

Malik just looked at her.

She was his sister. There wasn't a doubt in Malik's mind about that. Same here, same voice, same cloudy eyes. Everything.

Except for one major thing. Isis hated him.

He had proof too. Whenever he'd try to catch her eye, she would look away. If he'd walk up besides her, she'd either turn or scoot away. She was repulsed at Malik's very presence.

That hurt more than Malik cared to admit. The only thing he ever had going for him was Ishizu and Rishid. His family…they were the two people in the whole wide world who actually believed he wasn't just a murderous lunatic. They believed he wasn't just his darkness.

And now this Isis, his sister previous incarnation, refused to spare him as much as one glance!

That was probably the defining reason why Malik had followed Isis into her little room with the bowl thingy. He – and he was quite aware how disgusting and pathetic it was – needed to have Isis like him. Or at the very least know why she didn't.

Of course, she hadn't been pleased with Malik's presence. But frankly, Malik didn't care. It wasn't like her was bothering her that much. Most of the time she just sat there with her hands around her stupid millennium necklace, looking for Bakura.

Hmm. Fat chance.

"You remind me of someone," Malik said finally, sick of just watching her.

"I do," she said. It wasn't a question; it was a statement.

Figures she'd know that. She knew everything with that item on.

"My sister," he said nonchalantly.

"I do not wish to be rude," Isis paused, "but this requires the utmost concentration. Finding him is harder than usually…he seems to be surrounded by… darkness."

That caught Malik's attention.

"Both of them?" he asked.

Isis nodded, "Yes. Both of them."

Malik cocked a brow. He had a hard time believing that Ryou – meek, shy, 'I can't do anything but I still want to do good' – was shrouded by darkness.

Darkness. Isis had said the same thing about him earlier in the throne room.

"Do you see that darkness around me?"

There was a long silence. Isis was deciding whether or not she should answer.

"Yes. But yours is a little foggy," she replied calmly.

Malik's eyes narrowed. His own sister had just stabbed him in the back and then twisted.

But somehow, Malik still had more questions. He needed to know.

"So…does that mean you think I'm evil?"

Malik meant for those words to come off as taunting and confident, but in reality that just sounded bitter and broken.

Isis paused, "I sense great darkness in you."

"Isn't that the same thing?" Malik snapped.

"No," she said softly, closing her eyes.

Malik glared at her, waiting for an explanation. She gave none.

More time passed as Isis eyebrows furrowed, trying to see through Bakura's darkness.

Malik waited in the silence, scowling. 'I sense great darkness in you'. What in Ra's name did that mean? That he was doomed forever to be a psychopathic villain. That all his tries at redemption which basically meaningless?

That he could never be more than the darkness inside him?

"If it's any consolation," Isis said, her eyes still closed, "I sense a strong will for good in your heart as well."

That was surprising. Malik blinked and then let himself have a small smile. A strong will was good enough for him.

Isis gasped. Her eyes shot open.

"What?" Malik asked, trying to hold down his panic.

"I've found them," she said shakily.

"Ryou, too?"

Whoa, when did he become so concerned about Ryou's safety?

"Yes!" Isis exclaimed as she arose, "I must tell his highness. The King of Thieves is at Kul Elna!"

-0-

Ryou heard those voices again. Whispers. He couldn't understand them…they made his mind so fuzzy…

("Come back to us our son, have you forgotten your promise? _**Have you forgotten your promise**_!")

Ryou shivered.

The thief glared at him.

Ever since Ryou woke up (and that had taken about a day), that was all the thief did. Glare, grumble, scowl. No more than three words at the time and never a conversation.

It was worse than being with the spirit. He and the spirit at least had tension. An intense burning hatred on Ryou's side, cool uncomplicated contempt on the spirit's. Ryou hated being in the same room with the spirit because there was always the cackling of their pure loathing in the air.

With the thief, there was nothing. No tension, no hatred. Just awkwardness.

(Even when Ryou looked away, he could still feel the thief's eyes scorching into him.)

Ryou glanced up at the thief. He was still scowling. The scar under his eye probably should make him menacing.

(But, strangely, Ryou wasn't afraid.)

"Why did you bring me here?" Ryou asked without trembling, "Again."

The thief's eyes narrowed and his short grey hair fell down, "That bastard told me too."

Ryou knew without asking that 'that bastard' referred to the spirit of the ring. He found the nickname rather appropriate.

"Why does he want with me? I'm no use to him. I was ever only just a host…" Ryou trailed off, closing his eyes in bitterness.

The thief snorted, "It's plain to my eyes that you're worthless - but he was adamant on getting you back."

Ryou's face crumpled up, in disgust. (At himself, because he was strangely flattered.)

More silence. (Soft whispers in the background, like pleasant humming. Or dying screams.)

The thief went between fumbling with his newly won millennium items and glaring at Ryou.

Ryou leaned up against the wall and closed his eyes. He did need to catch up on his sleep, but also with his eyes closed he wouldn't have to see the thief glare. The blackness behind his eyes was very inviting…relaxing. ("Son, son - you must avenge us! Three items are not enough! Why do you rest when there is work to be done!?)

Ryou's eyes shot open.

The thief was shaking.

"You don't hear them, do you?" he asked as he clenched his fist. Ryou stared in horror as he drew blood.

"Hear who?" Ryou asked, suddenly scared. Not for himself, but for the thief.

"Our family," the thief cackled, "You don't remember, huh? Don't remember how they were stolen from us?"

The thief quivered and shook. Every inch of him.

He let out another laugh, this one louder and more manic. Like the spirit's.

(Ryou cringed.)

"Well I remember. I see it every night when I close my eyes…their screaming, their blood…that's all I can see!" He laughed again, with genuine humor in his voice.

"Isn't funny? Isn't funny!" the thief screamed, rage intertwining with his laughing, "And when I wake up…all hear is them…_whispering _at me. And I obey. Because I care, because they were wronged, because _I am a good son_!"

More blood dripped from the thief's fists.

"I'm the only one that cares for them still. The two of you," he hissed, "have done nothing to help them. So why is all their anger taken out on me?"

Ryou's mouth hanged open. He was watching a man (himself, really, Ryou knew it was himself) go insane.

"Answer me!" the thief yelled.

Ryou pulled his legs to his chest and looked at the ground.

"I don't know what you're asking," he whispered.

Something unidentifiable flooded the thief's eyes.

"_**Why do you get to forget?!**_" he bellowed, his voice echoing across the remnants of Kul Elna.

Ryou hugged himself tighter.

Silence.

(Not even whispers.)

"I hate you," the thief said and regained some composure.

Ryou said nothing.

"You're pathetic. You're worthless, You're weak" the thief prattled on, "You cannot do anything by yourself. You're powerless."

Those words were so familiar to Ryou.

("And how does someone as pathetic as you, my dear landlord, plan to rid yourself of me? You're powerless; you're weak. Without me you'd be less than nothing.")

Ryou looked at him with hard eyes.

"You can't hurt me with those words," he said as his voice cracked, "I already know that."

The thief gasped slightly, blinked, and then scowled.

"You're hindrance. I don't know why my future self keeps you around."

Ryou didn't have answer for that.

The thief glared at him though, expecting one.

Flinching away from the harsh stare, Ryou looked up at the sky. Maybe the answer was written in the clouds.

A long moment of silence passed and out of the corner of Ryou's eye, he could see the thief relaxed. Good, he was much calmer now.

"You hate me so much, but you don't even know me. If anything, I should hate you," Ryou said, a slight airy tone to his voice.

(He wasn't afraid of the thief, even after that outburst, so he was allowed to be honest.)

"You're my weakness incarnated," the thief said, "Why shouldn't I hate you?"

Ryou looked back down to his feet.

"From my point of view, you're are nothing but my hate and rage. But I don't hate you."

(Ryou hadn't realized that was true until he said it.)

The thief, again, was startled.

"You hate _him _though."

Ryou shrugged.

"That's different. He deserves it," said Ryou. To his surprise, the thief smiled. Then laughed.

(It was friendly noise, carefree like summer. So unlike the unhinged laughs Ryou had just moments ago.)

Ryou smiled back.

Then, the sound of footsteps.

Ryou's blood froze and his pulse quickened. The spirit, it was the spirit.

The thief gave him an inquisitive look.

(He didn't understand. Ryou, even with all of his hatred, was terrified of the spirit.)

"Welcome home, landlord," the spirit sneered.

Ryou glared. But before he could say anything, the thief jumped in.

"Where have you been?" he shouted.

The spirit closed his eyes and smirked.

"I've been busy," he replied.

The thief cursed loudly.

"I've gotten three items without you're help! What makes you think I need you?" the thief roared.

The spirit looked at him up and down, then chuckled.

When the spirit gave no response, Ryou was afraid that the thief was really going to slaughter him. The look on his face.

Ryou suddenly felt a strong surge of affection for the thief. (Despite…well, despite everything.) He hated the spirit of the ring almost as much as he did.

While Ryou was contemplating that, he didn't notice the spirit had moved so that he was standing right above Ryou.

He pulled Ryou up by his shirt and shoved him against the wall. The action wasn't meant to hurt him (in fact it didn't hurt Ryou at all) but meant to show power.

("You're powerless," the thief's word echoed inside Ryou's skull.)

"I was a fool for having allowed any freedom," the spirit's dark eyes tore through his soul, "But assure you, my landlord, that it will not happened again."

Ryou frowned and glared, trying to desperately to hid his fear.

The spirit, his upper lip snarling, dropped Ryou to the floor.

"I heard what you did to protect the Pharaoh's container. Something so noble and brave…you think your friends would have tried to rescue you by now. If they were your friends," the spirit said condescendingly.

"They are my friends…you're a liar!" yelled Ryou and then was instantly ashamed. (The spirit always managed to get the best of him.)

The spirit of the ring turned to him, a small smirk on his lips, "You say that a lot, host. Isn't it about time you meant it?"

Ryou was taken a back.

"I do mean it," he stuttered out.

The spirit chuckled and turned away.

"Get up," he commanded, his back still turned, "I have something to show you."

-0-

"Yuugi," said the Pharaoh, frowning, "Friends, I don't think -"

"Save it," said Anzu, with a smile.

"There's no way we're letting you go on your own," Honda continued.

"Haven't you got that by now?" said Jou.

"Other me…Pharaoh," Yuugi said, with a huge smile, "We are going to be by your side. Always. No matter what."

The Pharaoh's face lighten up and he too smiled.

"Always," he repeated.

Malik watched on from his horse with jealousy. Pure and simple. Why was it that they had so much faith in each other when Malik's own sister couldn't fully trust?

Part of him knew it had to do with the whole trying to kill the Pharaoh and taking control of people's minds thing. But still. It hurt to see such a bond like theirs, when he didn't have one.

Malik sighed and placed his head on the horse. Everyone was ready to make the trip to Kul Elna, except for them. Malik snorted under his breath as he remembered how much work it took to convince them to let him go.

They were so very foolish if they ever for a second thought that he wouldn't come along. He was going to save Ryou. Then, punch him. Hard.

Malik's rage still lingered on the surface. No wonder Bakura could take Ryou over so easily. Ryou probably didn't even try to stop him. Though, when he thought about it, the Ryou he'd meant in the soul room seemed so much more defiant…

"Ready, my king?" asked Seto. Ishizu - Isis, Malik mentally corrected, had told him the priest's name. Not like Malik couldn't have guessed.

The Pharaoh nodded as he got on his horse.

Everyone lashed at their horses. Seto and Akhenaden rode in front of everyone. Malik, Yuugi, Anzu and the Pharaoh rode behind them. Jou, Honda and Isis right behind them. Mahaado was not allowed to come, he needed rest. As for the other priests…it was unclear if they'd even survive.

Again, Malik was impressed how monotonous the landscape was. The real Egypt was so much better. And Malik hated Egypt.

It didn't seem like a long ride, but the sun was setting by the time Malik first saw the flicker of Kul Elna. Slowly, he saw more. In the distance, charred remains of walls and broken houses became clear. The village of Kul Elna looked nothing more than a faded photograph.

Malik narrowed his eyes.

He was ready.

-0-

A ghostly chill ran down Ryou's spine. He trembled a bit.

The spirit left the small, wrecked house. And against his better instincts, Ryou followed him. (Somehow, somehow he always did.)

It was the first time he (truly) saw the village of Kul Elna in the day light. In the moonlight, it had looked almost mystical, but now under the glare of the sun, it simply looked dead.

(Cold, withered, burned and dead.)

"Where are we going?" Ryou inquired, struggling to keep up with spirit's brisk pace.

The spirit turned around. His arms were crossed and the trench coat billowed out from under him.

His eyes were burning black.

(Burning…burning like…)

"You mean you still haven't remembered yet?" the spirit sneered.

Ryou took a step back. Every inch of his body screamed at him to run.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Ryou lied.

The spirit snorted.

A strong gust of wind howled passed them.

Ryou opened his eyes to find everything had changed.

The sun was gone. Yes it had just vanished… and in its place was the bright, eerie full moon. The rubble of Kul Elna was no longer rubble. All of the houses looked brand new and torches burned in all of them. Ryou even heard laughter…

"What is this?" Ryou asked, shaking.

(He already knew the answer.)

The spirit said nothing, but from Ryou's perspective it almost looked like he was trembling too.

A thunderous sound of hooves filled the air, blocking out the happy sounds of chatting and laughter. Ryou turned and saw a whole squad of the Pharaoh's army riding towards the happy village.

(Don't come any closer, he silently begged them, please just turn around and go away…)

His skin pricked and his mind went fuzzy.

As the riders neared, Ryou recognized their leader. It was the same man who had been with the Pharaoh when he and Malik had been to the palace. The one who would later have the millennium eye.

They stopped a couple yards before the village actually began and jumped off their horses. In their arms they didn't carry spears like Ryou expected. They had knives.

It was only because Ryou could see them that he knew they were there. As they ran towards the village (his village) they made no sounds.

One ran right through Ryou.

Horrified, Ryou brushed himself off.

"What is this?" Ryou asked, his voice quivering.

The spirit looked at him. (For a second, it almost looked like pity in his eyes.)

"A memory."

Ryou covered his mouth. (Crashing, it was a crashing feeling…no, not crashing…burning…burning like….)

"No!" he said, to no one, but dashed off after the guards all the same.

The spirit followed him.

Akhenaden gave a signal to his men. Then chaos.

With the ferocity only known to demons, they attacked. Some kicked down the doors, others broke the walls. But within seconds the previously silent night flooded with screams.

"Keep them alive!" Akhenaden shouted over the rising din, "It will only work if their alive!"

Ryou furrowed his brows. What would work?

The guards came back out. Ryou gasped. Every guard had bundles of (familiar faces) people in their arms. The men were knocked unconscious, but the women and children screamed.

The children…!

(Acid rose in Ryou's throat.)

All of the Pharaoh's guards were unfazed by the cries. They looked at the people with indifference. They carried them like they were trash.

"This way!" Akhenaden said, "Leave no one behind!"

The guards followed and his families' cries increased. They knew what was coming. They knew.

"Where are they taking them?" Ryou asked the spirit, not because he wanted an answer. He wanted to know his answer was wrong.

The spirit kept his face indifferent (but there was something in his eyes…) and said, "Watch."

Ryou turned around.

A small boy came out of one of the shattered houses. He had short grayish white hair and tanned skin.

(He was crying.)

"It's him," Ryou whispered.

"You," the spirit corrected.

The little boy (Ryou gagged, he was so small, he couldn't be older than seven) ran after the guards. He screamed for his mother, for his father. For his sister.

Ryou had never been more cold than he was now.

Staggering, Ryou fled after the little boy. After his family. He had to stop whatever it was that the guards were going to do. With every ounce of his strength, he had to stop this!

The guards dragged the people into a dimly cavern. A fire in the center was the only light source. Above it was a large golden pot.

Akhenaden pointed to the guard holding one man and three little girls.

"Go," he said and motioned to the pot.

"Stop! Stop! Please!" they cried, "Someone help us! Pharaoh save us!"

Their pleas went ignored and the guard tossed them into the pot.

They didn't scream. The noise they made couldn't be classified as a scream. It was a high pitched, clawing, desperate sound. A soul splitting sound. They screamed and screamed and reached up towards the sky, hoping for salvation. None came. The fire burned them. Licked at their skin, melted the flesh of their burns. Made sure that their faces would forever be twisted in agony. The women's hand reached out as she sank down into the cauldron. Reached out…reached out…(the fire burned it)…reached out.

Then they were all nothing.

The small boy and Ryou's expressions were the same.

(Horror.)

Akhenaden motioned for the next group, when the group before that was a golden liquid.

(Golden like…golden like…)

Ryou remembered.

The epiphany was dim and disgusting. His head throbbed, but was no longer fuzzy. He felt empty; he felt rage. All at once he knew.

There was nothing he could do to stop it.

(The child looking on knew the feeling.)

The next grouped screamed louder than the last.

Ryou covered his eyes and turned to the spirit, who watched the scene with intent.

"I remember! I remember!" he screamed, "Please just make it stop! I'll do anything you want just _make it stop_!"

The spirit looked down at him (like he always did) and everything around them turned to ashes. It faded away.

(Except the screams. The screams would be there forever.)

The sun shone brightly on Ryou and mocked the slaughter that he had just witness.

(The blood was still there, though. At his feet. The blood was still there.)

"The items! There…there," he stuttered.

The ring. The ring had been made from _that_. And Oh god, - oh god he had worn them, underneath his shirt. It had dug into his skin. Their souls had been on his skin!

Ryou vomited.

Then he collapsed on his knees. Onto the blood stained sand.

(And cried.)

-0-

Seto and Akhenaden stopped just short of the actually village. Everyone else stopped too.

Malik hopped off his horse eagerly, but no one made a move to go inside the village.

"What's wrong?" Anzu asked, sensing what Malik had sensed.

Yuugi pointed.

The King of Thieves sauntered over to them lazily, a Cheshire like grin on his face.

"Welcome to my home, Pharaoh," he said as his eyes harden, "We've been expecting you."

Malik's eyes narrowed. We?

"Stop this insanity, now!" the Pharaoh roared.

The thief chuckled, "But we've only just begun our game, Pharaoh. Don't you want to have a little fun?"

The Pharaoh glowered at the thief.

"No?" the thief said when the Pharaoh didn't respond, "But the spirits of Kul Elna do and it seems so wrong to deny them…"

The thief's voice was high and seemed amused, but his face wasn't even close to that. There was no light in his eyes. His scar shined brightly on his face.

He bent down in a crouching predator position.

"You will pay for what happened here."

Ahead of him, Malik saw Akhenaden visible flinch.

Before he even had time to fully process that, a sharp pain pierced through his back. He cried out, as did everyone around him. Malik fell to his knees and found that he couldn't move. Something was holding him.

To his disgust, pale screaming faces attached to foggy tails held him down.

Theses ghosts held them all down.

The thief let out a monstrous laugh, worse than any of those ones Malik heard back at the Palace. It almost sounded like a cry.

The man in the red cloak shuffled towards the bowing Pharaoh.

His millennium puzzle lit up but the ghost quickly swarmed to put it out. They did it so easily. Like blowing out a candle.

Out of his cloak, the thief pulled out a knife.

Everyone but Malik gasped.

"Justice has finally come for you Pharaoh," the thief said lowly. His eyes blazed.

The Pharaoh struggled, but Malik could tell it would be of no use. The impossible had happened.

The Pharaoh had lost.

The thief raised his blade and smiled.

"No!" shouted a voice, meek and soft and subtly sad.

Ryou.

The white haired boy, who looked more like a white streak, raced towards them. The thief didn't noticed and the blade was coming down faster than Ryou could possibly run…

Ryou jumped in front of the kneeling Pharaoh and the knife plunged through -

Malik looked closer. The knife hadn't even scratched Ryou. It had thrust through the wailing ghost shapes.

The thief dropped his knife in sheer shock. His grey eyes widen to extremes and his mouth hung open.

Ryou's eyes narrowed.

"It works both ways, you know."

And Ryou surprised Malik yet again.

-0-

Ryou remembered. He heard his family cry out for their vengeance (and yet they still protected him). In his heart, in his soul, he knew what atrocities had been done to them.

But he would not allow justice to come this way.

Not with blood.

There was too much blood on his hands already, and he could not, _would _not allow more. For the sake of his forsaken soul. No more blood.

"How…**_dare_**…you," the thief said, panting. His eyes darted back and further, in a frenzy.

Ryou clenched his fists.

"I will not let you harm them. Any of them. Not even in _their_ name," said Ryou. He trembled, but his voice reminded steady.

(I'm sure, aren't I, I'm sure…)

The thief stared, his face distorting more and more with each breath.

"Traitor!" he yelled and lunged Ryou.

He sidestepped, but the thief yanked him back by his arm. The thief pushed Ryou to ground. Ryou kicked him squarely in his chest.

"You robbed me of my justice!" the thief hissed as he tried to punch Ryou in the face.

Ryou dodged, "You're justice is wrong! Don't believe the spirit's lies. You don't need to kill the Pharaoh and summon Zorc to avenge them. The fact that you're living is vengeance enough!"

The thief stopped for a brief second, and hope fluttered into Ryou's heart.

Though they did not know it, the ghosts of Kul Elna around the others evaporated.

The Pharaoh arose.

"I shall end you here, thief," the Pharaoh said.

Both Ryou and the King of Thieves turned their attention to him.

(Ryou was suddenly very frighten. The Pharaoh was not Yuugi. The Pharaoh would kill the thief.)

The thief looked at him and laughed.

(And the small flame of hope in Ryou's heart died out.)

The spirit's of Kul Elna swarmed around him as the thief retreated.

"I told you we weren't finishing playing yet, Pharaoh," he said with a grin, "You'll have to come a little further."

And the thief disappeared into the fallen village.

-0-

The Pharaoh took a step to follow the thief, but Ryou grabbed onto him.

"Wait," he said, "Let's think of plan first."

Everyone surrounded the Pharaoh.

"I agree, my king. We must not be unprepared," said Isis.

"Right," said Seto, "There's a reason why that thief wants in the village. He must have another advantage besides those…"

"Spirits," Ryou finished for him, "They're the spirits of the Kul Elna. They protect him because they're his family. He's their only son."

The priest's eyes furrowed as they took that information in. Even Akhenaden's. Ryou shot him a foul look. How could he still pretend he didn't know? If the thief should kill anyone it should have been him…

(Ryou shook his head, trying to shake off the dark thoughts.)

"And why exactly did the spirits protect you as well?" Seto asked and eyed his askance.

Ryou looked at him with disdain.

"Because I am his reincarnation."

All of them looked at Ryou with wide eyes.

Malik smiled. So he finally admitted it. At least that was a start.

"Is that true Bakura-kun?" Yuugi asked uncertainly. (Was that a hint of fear? Or sadness?)

Ryou looked away.

"Yes. It's all true," he said.

Silence overtook all of them as not another word was spoken. Malik saw the cringing Ryou and decided maybe he owed it to the boy to help him out.

"So," Malik said, "what's the other reason why Bakura wants us to go in that creepy looking village?"

Something sparked in the Pharaoh's eyes. He touched his millennium puzzle.

"The items," said the Pharaoh, "they must be the reason why he wants us here."

"What do they items have to do with Kul Elna?" Malik asked.

Ryou waited for Akhenaden to finally confess and answer, but he did not.

Instead, the Pharaoh did.

"The items were created in this village," he said, with no trace of emotion.

Ryou froze as his eyes widened to an impossible size.

"You…know?" he asked, trembling.

The Pharaoh frowned a bit, sensing Ryou's hatred.

"Yes."

"Tell me, tell me how," Ryou said, bowing his head.

(?_Does he know? Does he really know?_)

The Pharaoh looked to Yuugi and Yuugi motioned for him to explain.

"A village of criminals had to be sacrificed in order to create the items. In order to protect Egypt."

Ryou's face darkened.

"That's a lie."

The Pharaoh looked towards with Ryou with slightly narrowed eyes and said, "What?"

"Whoever told you that was lying," Ryou said slowly, pausing after every word.

(He was trying to regain himself.)

"You're mistaken. Mahado told me the truth himself," said the Pharaoh.

"He's lying," muttered Ryou with a soft chuckle.

The Pharaoh glared for a second and then his demeanor lighten, "You must not believe whatever the spirit of the millennium ring told you, he -"

(God, those words were familiar…but here there were wrong…so wrong…)

"Shut up," Ryou hissed softly, eyes burning.

Everyone's eyes widened, including Malik's.

"You know _nothing_. What your father's men did to my village was unforgettable, unforgivable, and unequally evil. Eviler than anything my other could ever do! At least…at least he knows that he's a complete monster. That's better than you. Because you're such a liar. You pretend to stand for justice…but all you ever do is play the winning hand. That's it. You are not a shining beacon of morality, Pharaoh. You're not even a decent human. So stop pretending to be the hero. Stop pretending like you're good."

Malik watched, waiting for Ryou to snap out of it. For the white haired boy's eyes to go all wide with shock and start to apologize profusely.

It never happened.

Ryou simply turned away (from all of them, even Malik) and walked towards the rubble that was Kul Elna.

There was a long, seemingly endless moment of silence. It was as if they had all just been slapped in the face, not just the Pharaoh.

"Pharaoh,"

"Bakura is our friend," Yuugi said, but he no longer sounded as sure as he previously did.

Malik shook off his disbelief and the others' doubts.

"Ryou! Ryou!"

Ryou stopped in his tracks.

"What?" He called without turning around.

Malik pulled Ryou's arm and made the white haired boy look at him.

(His eyes were coal black.)

"Ryou!" Malik said and shook him. "What the _hell_ was that?"

Ryou still refused to look at him.

"Was I wrong?" He asked softly, but the bitter undertones loomed at Malik like pointed swords.

Malik didn't have answer. He'd thought lots of things about the Pharaoh, previously. He could still taste that strong hatred on his lips…

But that was before…and he had changed…

"Was I!?" shouted Ryou.

"No," Malik finally admitted, "No, you weren't wrong at all."

Ryou's shoulders slumped.

"I should apologize," he whispered, "There was no reason for that."

But there was a reason. Ryou had just proven that.

"There's nothing worse than apologizing." Malik spoke from experience.

Ryou glared at the ground again.

"I know I should," he said, "but I just _can't_. I can't take it back, Malik. I meant it."

"I know, Ryou," Malik said, "It was kinda obvious."

Before Ryou could response, a sugary sweet voice chirped in.

"Hey, Bakura-kun."

Ryou's eyes went wide and then settle into smoldering blank stare.

"Can we talk?" The questions seemed more direct to Malik than Ryou.

Malik let go of Ryou's arm, "Fine with me."

The tomb keeper strutted away, but not back to where the others were. No, there was something about this village Malik needed to see for himself.

-0-

Ryou watched Malik leave, silently begging the boy to come back.

(He didn't.)

It was just him and Yuugi.

"Are you alright, Bakura-kun?" Yuugi asked, tentatively taking a step forward.

"I'm fine." It wasn't until after he said that Ryou realized how ridiculous of a lie that was.

Ryou closed his eyes and sighed, "I've been better."

"What happened to you back there?" Yuugi said, finally gaining the courage to ask, "You seemed so angry."

"I am angry!" Ryou shot back, "Even now - three thousand years later - _he _still refuses to take responsibility!"

Silence. It sprawled across them, separating them even further.

"I'm sorry," Ryou said after a long time. After comprehending that Yuugi was not going to leave him alone.

"Did you mean what you said back there? About Yam - the Pharaoh?" Yuugi asked, his voice quivering a bit.

Ryou shut his eyes tightly.

(He should lie; it would be so much easier just to lie…)

"Yes," he said, still with his back turned from Yuugi.

And then Ryou added, "Sorry."

"Bakura-kun, I know you think you know the truth but -"

"Don't," Ryou threatened, and then pleadingly, "Please, Yuugi-kun, don't."

Yuugi didn't try again, which scared Ryou to his core.

"Are you afraid of me?" he asked softly, holding his hands together tightly.

"What? Of cccourse - of course, not!" Yuugi stuttered a bit, but he sounded honest enough.

Ryou turned around.

The gap between them was a few feet at most, but expanded through lifetimes. A soft wind blew passed them. To Ryou it sounded like whispers.

(The spirits of Kul Elna were growing restless, waiting for the final battle between two kings to commence again.)

"I'm sorry," Ryou said again, closing his eyes, "I really am. I didn't mean for it to turn out this way, Yuugi-kun. I never wanted this…I never wanted to know…"

Ryou opened his eyes wide and smiled.

(It was broken and pathetic, but at least it was honest.)

"I never deserved a friend like you."

"Bakura-kun, what are you talking about?" Yuugi said exasperated, "You sound like you're giving up."

Ryou turned back around. Maybe he was.

"I think you should go back now. The Pharaoh is probably getting worried."

"No!" Yuugi exclaimed and grabbed Ryou's hand, "Not without you."

He (much like Malik had done before) made Ryou face him.

"Bakura," Yuugi said, his violet eyes burning deep into Ryou's own, "Whatever happened here doesn't matter. That was the past. Don't you get it? You're my friend now."

Ryou blinked and tilted his head to the side, "Yuugi-kun."

"Let's go," Yuugi said with confidence.

Ryou smiled, "Okay."

-0-

Ryou returned with Yuugi to where his friends and the Pharaoh's remaining priests were.

He couldn't look the Pharaoh in the eyes. (Even if he hadn't been wrong.)

Suspecious glances bore into Ryou. He knew he shouldn't plan them, he had just had spectacular freak out, but he did. Had he not gone against himself (against his family's only wishes) to protect him?

Ryou had…issues with the Pharaoh. But he wouldn't kill him, if that's what they thought.

(He wouldn't…)

"Where's Malik?" Ryou finally asked, craning his neck for the sight of the boy. After everything that occurred, Malik was suddenly a comfort in Ryou's life. A friend.

"Last time we saw him, he ran after you," Anzu said.

Ryou looked to Yuugi, who was frowning and then at Kul Elna.

"You don't think he went in there by himself, do you?" Ryou asked.

Yuugi looked to Kul Elna as well.

"I think he did."

"Well, then, all the more reason to go into that village right now!" exclaimed Jou.

Seto looked towards the Pharaoh.

"Are we ready, my king?" he asked.

The Pharaoh again touched the puzzle on his neck, "Let's go."

(Ryou closed his eyes, debating for a moment if he should follow them. To go back…after all he'd seen…)

"Bakura-kun?" Yuugi said gently, "Are you alright?"

Ryou opened his eyes.

(Time to prove that he meant what he'd said. Time to stop switching view points. Time to make a final stand.)

"Yeah, Yuugi. Let's go,"

They entered the village, the Pharaoh surrounded on all sides. The spirits rose from the ground and curled up Ryou's leg. He repressed a cry.

A demented laugh came from each end of the village.

"I was beginning to think you'd never come, Pharaoh," the voice said, though no one (not even Ryou) could see it's source.

Anzu screamed.

From the shadows, at least fifteen faceless robed figures surfaced. They were armed with swords and their eyes were a bright, deep red.

Not them again, Ryou thought.

Without warning, the black cloaked things were on them. They attacked everyone separately. Two were on Isis, seven blocked off Akhenaden, Seto and the Pharaoh, five attacked Yuugi, Anzu, Honda and Jou. The final one lashed it's sword at Ryou.

(No miracle fuzzy feeling came to play, no sudden burst of strength.)

Ryou backed away slowly and then ran.

-0-

Isis had never been good at hand to hand combat. She'd always relied on her necklace to protect her…but every since that boy…Malik had entered her life, the sacred millennium necklace no longer responded to her as well.

The black robed figures, servants of the Thief King, lunged at. Yet again, she just barely dodged. She knew she couldn't keep this up much longer…

Even if that meant she'd be failing her Pharaoh. Her duty.

Both of the robed figures swung their swords and Isis ducked and tripped. They pressed both of their blades into her throat.

"Hello, dear priestess," said a voice, growing louder as she heard footsteps, "You have something that belongs to me."

The millennium necklace. Isis gripped it tight.

"You'll have to kill me first," she said, and only by years of practice did her voice remain steady and firm.

The King of Thieves smirked.

"I intend to."

His eyes held nothing but darkness, even if the millennium necklace only vaguely told her that, she knew. He was pure evil.

He reached down to her throat and ripped the necklace off of her.

As he turned he told the robed figures, "Kill her."

The blades moved from her neck and raised upwards to her chest.

Isis closed her eyes. And silently prayed for the protection of the fallen Kalim, Shada and Mahaado.

Prayed for the Pharaoh to save all of Egypt.

The sharp hiss of a blade filled her ears, but she felt no pain.

Isis opened her eyes. The robed figures were nothing but dust. In their place was that boy. Malik.

"You?" she asked, in awe. All this time she had been so certain that he would eagerly watch her die.

Malik smiled, with a hint of a small smirk.

"Me," he replied and offered her his hand.

Isis faltered. The millennium necklace had told her, she had seen, the darkness in this boy's heart. How could she possible trust him? Even if he did save her, how could she trust him around the Pharaoh?

Malik sighed.

"Look," he said, "I don't care what you think of me. You're my sister. And not going to let anything happen to you. Now come on."

Isis didn't hesitate. She grabbed Malik's hand.

"Let's go save the Pharaoh."

-0-

The robed figures followed Ryou, though they never tried to actually hurt him. It both relieved and angered him.

(For Ryou knew they were sent not to kill him, but recapture him.)

So he never stopped running, not even for a second. But the faceless black cloaked…(well, Ryou wasn't sure what to call them) did.

They bowed.

Ryou turned around, slowly, as nausea hit him.

The spirit stood behind him, arms crossed, trench coat curling with the wind.

"What? You're not going to run away again?" the spirit sneered.

("How can you quit so easily?" said Malik.)

Ryou looked down, defeated. He knew he was a hypocrite…but he just couldn't…

"No," he said and then he turned back towards Kul Elna, "Let's go."

-0-

When they arrived at the place where all of the soul of Kul Elna had been fused to create the items, the theft was already waiting for them. He held the millennium necklace, twisting and playing with it. To the right of him was Akhenaden.

"Why is he here?" Ryou demanded, his fists clenched.

"He knows the power of darkness," the spirit said, "and he has the eye, the puzzle and the rod."

It then dawned on Ryou why those robbed men had split them up in the way they had. Akhenaden had planned to take the Pharaoh's and Priest Seto's items from the very beginning.

How despicable. Ryou thought if he should ask why Akhenaden would do something like that, especially after slaughtering his family in the name of the Pharaoh. But suddenly, he found that he didn't care. (About anything, anymore.)

He just…he just wanted…

(Ryou didn't know really. That's why he saved the Pharaoh. That's why he was here with the spirit and the thief by his own accord.)

The thief grinned, "They're coming."

Ryou knew who he was talking about.

(And knew that now was when he could not longer make false promises. Now he had to chose sides.)

The spirit looked to Ryou, raising a brow.

Ryou didn't look at him, instead her focused on the doorway to the dark, charred, bloodstained, cavern.

"I'm ready."

-0-

Yuugi came in first. There was a long slash on his check and the robed figures dragged him across the stone floor with no mercy. Anzu followed. She was completely unconscious. Honda and Jou were brought in together, both kicking, cursing and desperately trying to squirm out of the mysterious figures grasps.

Ryou hid behind a wall. He couldn't face them (because in his heart he knew what he was doing was wrong; he was ashamed).

Next came the Pharaoh. One robed monster held him from behind, two more pointed their swords at him. He glared but was stony silent.

Priest Seto followed him. One faceless thing held him as well, but he only had one other that was guarding him too. His pupils were freakishly small and he was sweating. He looked like he'd seen a ghost.

No one else followed. Not even the Priestess Isis. Or Malik.

Ryou's heart skipped a beat. Malik. Where was Malik?

The spirit of the ring stepped out to center stage.

"Hello, Pharaoh. It's been a while."

The Pharaoh's eyes went wide.

"Bakura! I should have known you were behind this!" he shouted.

Ryou rolled his eyes. Didn't he and Malik specifically tell the Pharaoh that the spirit was behind all this?

(But they hadn't believed them and Ryou had been so upset because he had honestly wanted to help the Pharaoh. And now…)

Ryou looked at the Pharaoh with disgust. He hated him. Maybe, maybe he really deserved to die.

He clasped his hand to his face. How could he think these things? The Pharaoh had never been cruel to him, never done anything with malicious intent. How could there be so much hate in his heart?

(The Pharaoh didn't deserve this, his mind told him, I should stop this all…)

"Reverse what you did to Akhenaden!" the Pharaoh shouted.

The spirit chuckled.

"Me? I didn't do anything. He sought the darkness on his own," said the spirit.

"Liar!" the Pharaoh roared.

"He was the wise one, Pharaoh. Once Zorc is summoned you will realize that. It, after all, will be the last thing you ever see."

The spirit laughed and the Pharaoh said no more.

Everyone watched as Akhenaden placed all the items in the tablet. The emitted a spectacular light, far brighter than anything Ryou had ever witnessed before.

(It hurt.)

The thief watched Akhenaden with intent, hungry eyes. He licked his lips.

Ryou watched with sad, forlorn eyes. So it was finally happening. Zorc was going to rise again.

He could stop it. If he wanted to. He should stop it. And because of that (because of every scream) the fact that it was the good thing to do no longer matter. Vengeance ached in him and…killing would be wrong….he couldn't stand to see anymore blood. (But maybe…) Maybe, the darkness they were about to unleash would cover his eyes. Then he wouldn't ever have to see anything ever again.

(Would that make the hurt stop? The darkness? Would it make the hurt finally stop?)

Yuugi spotted Ryou and gasped.

"Bakura-kun?" he said as voice trembled.

Ryou closed his eyes.

(And prayed for his sins to be forgiven.)

A loud crash sound rippled from the doorway.

Ryou stared up in amazement. A horse leaped out towards them; it carried Isis and an armed Malik.

Malik leapt off without a second's effort and he with his sword in hand charged at three robed figures guarding the Pharaoh. He destroyed one of them and the Pharaoh eagerly helped him finish the last two off.

Ryou glanced at the spirit, who did nothing.

Behind them, crouching, the thief let out a monstrous laugh.

"Just what the hell is so funny?" Malik hissed, in between pants.

The spirit smirked.

"Theatrics aside," he said, seemingly almost amused, "You're too late. All of you."

The tablet sunk into the ground and the light collapsed on its self. In it's place thin wisps of smoky darkness seeped from the hole.

Ryou took a step back.

Oh no.

Tears overflowed his eyes.

Oh, god - oh god, what had he done?!

Ryou fall onto his knees. How could he have let this happened? How could he have not even tried?

The darkness grew stronger and deep rumbling shook all of the other.

No one moved. All anyone could do was stare.

It was all his fault. This, (the darkness spilling out) was all because of him. His hatred, his desire for vengeance, over millennia, over two lifetimes. It clung to Ryou eternally and now…now he had doomed the world to his same fate.

Yuugi. Malik.

He had betrayed them both, out of pure selfishness! Because he refused to let the past be the past…let it go…

Forgiveness.

Akhenaden jumped into the rising darkness (and behind him Ryou faintly heard Seto cry out).

The thief was transfixed by it. He loomed over the edge.

Don't, Ryou begged him silently, don't let it take you.

(It had already fully taken the spirit. It had already taken him. Even if he didn't have blood directly on his hands, it didn't matter. What he had done was wrong…and he would never be able to forgive himself.)

Forgive himself.

That's how this all started, wasn't it? Because he could never forgive himself for surviving when all of his family didn't. (His own family couldn't forgive him either.) Even though it hadn't been his fault! Ryou had seen (again and again and again) - he was just a child! And the darkness preyed upon him, festered and poured salt on his wounds. Feed his hate.

Now he was nothing but hate. Hate and cold indifference.

(More tears fell.)

No more. He would not die like this.

Not with all this hate.

Ryou touched the thief's hand.

The thief recoiled and glared at him with renewed hatred.

Ryou did his best to smile.

"Please don't," he said, "You don't have too. It's okay to stay here and live, even without them."

The thief gaped and furrowed his brow. Not in anger. He just didn't understand.

(A weight was lifted off his shoulders and for the first time since he arrived in this place, Ryou could breath.)

But there was still hatred for himself. Still darkness in the corner of his heart.

The spirit.

(Yes. Time to finally except that he was part of the spirit and the spirit was part of him.)

He hated the spirit. Truly, fully, because of what happened in the past.

Ryou closed his eyes. He was going to die without the past (no matter how recent) tied to his soul.

The spirit eyes flashed with a cold fire. He watched the darkness grow with anticipation and…maybe admiration.

Ryou took a step to him. The spirit looked at him with mild disinterested and narrowed his eyes. Ryou took a breath. He step forward and hugged the spirit.

Ryou didn't say anything, because he had no words to say to the spirit. All he had to give was forgiveness.

He hugged the spirit tighter and buried his head in his shoulder.

(And just let all of his hatred…go.)

The spirit wrapped his arms around Ryou.

And hugged him back.

Then, complete darkness.

-0-

Malik awoke, for the second time in Ra knows how many days, in a pile of sand. The lilac eyed boy cursed slightly as he brushed the sand off him. It was only then did he realize where he was. The Pharaoh's tomb.

The events of whatever that was bombarded him. The last thing he remembered was the darkness bubbling over, only to exploded and then -

Ryou. Ryou had done something.

"Damn it!" he cried, as he raced down the stairs. Everyone must be done further than he was, because he had refused to go any further than this…

As he jumped the finally step, Malik saw double. Literally.

The Pharaoh was just now groggily coming back to his senses. Yuugi was sprawled out of top of him.

…That was not what the scriptures had told him would happened.

But where was _Ryou_? Where was that lying, backstabbing, weak, kind-hearted, noble white hair?

Malik had to step over quite a few bodies, Kaiba, Jou, Honda, Anzu to name a few. before he saw what he was looking for.

"Ryou!" he exclaimed and rushed over to the boy's side.

Ryou clutched his head and opened his eyes.

"Malik, is that you?" he said, barely awake.

"Yeah," said Malik, kneeling towards the boy.

Ryou smiled weakly at him.

Malik smirked back. Then promptly punched in the shoulder.

"Ouch!" Ryou hissed, and rubbed his shoulders, "What was the for?"

"For almost destroying the entire world!" Malik snarled.

"Oh, yeah," Ryou bowed his head, "I guess I really deserved that."

"Yeah," Malik snorted, "To say the least."

"Do you hate me?" Ryou asked.

"What?" Malik nearly shouted, "No! I said _almost_ destroyed, remember?"

To prove it, Malik flashed a genuine smile.

Ryou did the same.

But his smile disappeared when he peeked around Malik.

"They'll hate me though, for sure."

Malik couldn't lie, "Yeah. Probably. But at least you can you put a stop to…whatever it is you were starting. How did you stop Zorc, anyway?"

Something dawned in Ryou's eyes.

"I don't know," he whispered in amazement, "But it worked! Malik! _We're not dead_!"

Before Malik could work up a fittingly sarcastic remark, a voice called out from behind him.

"Malik?" said a woman's voice, cool and collected.

Ishizu.

Malik whipped around, "Ishizu?"

It was. She smiled at him. Malik, letting his whole arrogant guy façade drop, ran into his sister's arms.

Ishizu was startled for a second, than hugged him back.

"We've missed you," she said. Behind her, Malik saw Rishid walking towards them.

"What happened in the Pharaoh's memories?" asked Ishizu.

Malik smirked.

"It's a long story."

-0-

Ryou watched with a queasy feeling in his stomach as all the people he almost killed woke up. He was momentarily shocked at the fact that both Yuugi and the Pharaoh had separate bodies, but after the events of the days previous, it wasn't that hard to believe.

(Did that mean that the spirit…?)

Ryou stood up awkwardly. Expecting the worst, expecting what he deserved. Yuugi got up before anyone else.

He looked just as he did back in the Pharaoh's memories. Except for one very important thing. The slash on Yuugi's check was gone.

(All the wounds from the past were gone.)

Yuugi, shyly, smiled at him.

Ryou's heart fluttered. He ran into Yuugi's arms.

"I'm sorry," he whispered as he squeezed Yuugi tight, "I'm so sorry."

Yuugi closed his eyes and hugged Ryou back.

"I forgive you."

Everything next was a blur as Ishizu and the Pharaoh tried to figured out what had happened. And how the Pharaoh now remembered his name. Atemu.

(Ryou purposely zoned out after the word Zorc. If there was ever anything in his life he wanted to forget…)

Soon they all filed out of the Pharaoh's tomb. No one had tried to kill him yet or yelled at him for being a traitor, so Ryou was ecstatic. He went to follow Yuugi and the others when Malik stopped him.

"Don't think just because this little adventure is over that it'll be our last," Malik hissed at him.

Ryou glanced at him, "I don't think we could top this if we tried, Malik."

Malik crossed his arms, oozing smugness.

"You obviously don't know me, Ryou," he paused, "Wouldn't you agree Bakura?"

Ryou blinked as Malik stared into the shadows.

"Oi!" Malik called, "I know you're there, so didn't even bother pretending. Besides you can come out, they're gone."

Slowly, a figured formed out of the shadows.

Ryou couldn't help but smile.

The spirit sneered at Malik.

"Brat," he muttered. Malik just chuckled and ran up the stairs.

Ryou turned to the spirit. The spirit looked at him with tender eyes.

That's all Ryou needed.

"Come on," he said with a bright, truthful smile, "Let's go."

A/N Holy Crap. Guys. This is 80 pages long. I know, I know, so much TL;DR. And I know that the plot holes are big enough to drive trucks through, Akhenaden got no characterization, the uber cheesy ending, and good lord the typos….but despite all the problems with this fic. I'm really proud of it. Usually when I come up with an idea this long, I never finish it. But I finished this! And I worked so hard, so if there every was a time to review. Now is it.

I need your feedback guys. I want to know if you liked it.

Please, please, please review!


	60. A Modest Agreement

A/N Ambigious. Maybe some vague implied tornshipping.

* * *

_Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea. ~ Henry Fielding_

* * *

Ryou has never had tea with Malik since this whole thing started, but slowly it is becoming clear to him the reasons why.

Malik's questions are (horrible, degrading, amusing, exhilarating)…difficult to answer.

"And you and him?" Malik says as he eyes the millennium ring, forever bound to Ryou's neck.

"He and I have…" Ryou trails off, and watches his tea with interest.

"A rocky relationship?" Malik suggests.

Ryou frowns, "A modest agreement."

Malik snorts and his lips twist into a smirk.

"Modest? You sure like to dance around the subject. Considering him, I thought you'd at least be blunt."

"I'm nothing like him."

(Suddenly, traces of his old self. Clinching the tea cup so hard it shakes, not looking the person in their eyes…)

He snaps out of it quickly.

"Of course, we wouldn't get along if I was," Ryou feigns lightness in his voice, trying to shake of whatever just happened.

(Trying to forget that second, that flash of truth…)

Malik's eye soften and for once they look soft. Lilacs on a summer day.

Ryou looks away and waits for them to return to normal.

Eventually they do and Malik leans back in his chair and smirks. Always smirks with the two of them. Never smiles.

(Smiles are too real, smirks are just a game.)

Once, Ryou saw a flash of truth in Malik. His voice had quivered for just a second but then…

Then he just reverted back to whatever roles they are playing.

No time for honesty.

(Not here. Not in this.)

"Why did you ask for me?" Ryou asks, slowly, trying to hide his truth.

"I wanted to," Malik replies simply and breezily. Confident.

He looks at Ryou and again (always, always) Malik smirks.

"Haven't you ever wanted something?"

Ryou cradles his cup in his hands.

"Yes."

"And what is it that you want," Malik's eyes smolder and he leans in close, "Ryou Bakura?"

Ryou sips his tea.

(A small smirk spreads across his face.)

* * *

A/N Next chapter should be in time for Christmas! Also, ASL one year birthday is coming up and I want to do something special. If you have any ideas, feel free to tell me in your review!

Review, please!


	61. The Perfect Gift

A/N Separation canon. Which means, separate bodies, some fanon terms (Yami no Bakura = Bakura for example).

* * *

_Every gift from a friend is a wish for your happiness. ~ Richard Bach._

* * *

The phone was going to ring.

Any second now, Ryou was sure, it had too…

The scissors shook in his hand, but nevertheless he continued to snip the edges of paper. He cut big slices, small slices, shapes and wavy lines. Everything.

(In the dim, dark corner of his heart, Ryou remembered…Amane had been a slightly spoiled child, and loved her snowflakes to be as elaborate as possible…)

"This is ridiculous, yadonushi."

Ryou didn't look up. Bakura had been snarling the same phrase and variations of it for the past fifteen minutes.

(And Ryou was just sorted of use to it by now.)

Bakura's eyes narrowed.

"Don't ignore me when I'm talking to you," he said, gruffly and yet still sounded like a pouting child.

Ryou sighed and (very, very, uninterested) looked up.

"Yes?" Ryou spoke softly, trying not to turn his mild annoyance into flat out anger.

He did that a lot, actually. Always avoided topics that angered Bakura. Which was pretty limiting. In fact, it was probably easier to list what didn't make him irritated or just plain enraged. And, for whatever reason, Ryou's father was on the top of the list. But that was one, if the only one, topic that Ryou refused to ignore because of his yami. It was his father and if his father asked him to wait for a call on a certain day, he would.

(No matter how sarcastic Bakura got.)

"Stop this…_stupidity_. Why are you doing this to yourself again?" he half hissed, half pleaded.

Ryou put the scissors down.

"He told me he'd call today, yami. I have to be here to answer in case…" Ryou trailed off and closed his eyes. He didn't dare raise his hopes high enough to finish that sentence.

"In case he what, yadonushi?" Bakura sneered, "Actually doesn't cancel on you?"

Bakura snorted and shook his head.

"You're pathetic, sometimes, I swear…"

Ryou cringed. He hated that word.

(Sometimes at night laughter still echoed in head…)

Bakura must have sensed it, because his expression softened.

"Why do you let him hurt you like this?"

Ryou picked up his scissors again and started to cut into fresh paper.

"He's my father. Is it so wrong to hope that he visits me for Christmas?" Ryou said exasperated.

"Yes, when it's a father like yours. For Ra's sake, when is the last time you even saw him?" Bakura scoffed.

Ryou clenched his fists. Bakura knew. He only asked this to hurt him.

(Another snip of paper.)

"Well?"

"Four years, one week, five days…shall I go into the minutes too? Seconds even? Will that finally make you _happy_?" Ryou growled, but never took his eyes away from his paper.

Bakura blinked in surprise. Ryou guessed that, in his mind, he hadn't gone far enough to provoke that sort of reaction.

Ryou closed his eyes yet again, and the bags under his eyes became apparent.

"Sorry," he whispered.

(And cut a small half heart into the folded paper.)

Bakura looked off to the side and snorted. Which, Ryou had learned, was his way of saying 'Yeah, well, I kind of deserved that'.

Silence passed between them, except for the sound of Ryou's scissors.

"I don't understand you," Bakura finally admitted and ran a hand through his hair.

Ryou pressed his lips together.

(This couldn't be good.)

"Even though you and I both know what's going to happen when that phone rings, you're still _hoping_. How can you be so optimistic?"

"It's Christmas, yami," Ryou trailed off and his voice lowered, "I have to be."

Ryou opened the finished snowflake. A small border of squiggly lines, almost like vines, circled the inside, which was a heart. Just outside the heart were sharp, thunderbolt shapes, triangles, squares and a soft cloud like shape. He put in a pile with the others, all of them just as intricate.

(Just how Amane liked them.)

Bakura muttered something under his breath. Ryou was positive it had the words yadonushi and idiot in them.

He reached down to pick up his scissors but Bakura snatched them up. Ryou looked at him with shocked, brown eyes.

"What are you - ?"

"If you refused to listen to my advice, I might as well do something productive with this wasted day," Bakura snapped as he picked up a sheet of paper from the unfinished snowflake stack.

Ryou tilted his head.

"You don't have to stay here with me, you know."

"I know."

A small smile cracked through Ryou's porcelain face and he continued on with his cutting.

-0-

"Mommy! Mommy!" Amane hollered, waving her snowflake around, "Look what I made!"

Ryou couldn't help but smile. Amane's enthusiasm was contagious.

"It's beautiful, sweetie," she said and hung the snowflake in the window.

Amane grinned ear to ear.

"Let me see yours, Ryou!" she exclaimed and tugged at her older brother's sleeve. The white haired boy shied away.

"It's not as good as yours, Amane," said Ryou, blushing.

His mother gave him a gentle smile.

"I'm sure it's great," she said and plucked the snowflake out of his hand.

Amane gasped.

"Ryou it's so pretty!"

The boy in questioned flustered.

"Wow," Amane said, still in awe of the hanging snowflake, "Daddy's not going believe we made those when he comes home."

Big brown eyes, ones that son had inherited from mother, looked away.

"Listen," Ryou's mother said softly, kneeling down before her kids, "I have some bad news."

(Ryou held in the breath he took. He didn't want to hear what came next.)

"Your father is not going to make it home for Christmas."

"What!?" Amane hollered, "Why?"

Tears already flowed down her cheeks. Her mother pulled her into a tight hug.

"He really wants to come see you, Amane," Ryou's mother said, "But he's the only supervisor certified at his dig, and they just uncovered a rather large artifact."

Ryou's eyes sunk to the floor. He didn't see why artifacts should matter. It was Christmas.

"But look!" Ryou's mother said and turned Amane towards the Christmas tree, "He still sent you your presents!"

Amane was actually cheered up, but she stopped crying. Hand in hand, mother and daughter walked towards the brightly tree and inspected the presents.

Ryou stayed behind.

(His eyes never lifted from the ground.)

He didn't care what was in those boxes. The only thing he wanted was his father.

-0-

"Ryou? Ryou!"

The boy in questioned suddenly felt a sharp sting on his face.

"What!? What…happened?" Ryou said groggily, clutching his check, "Did you just…slap me?"

Malik rolled his eyes.

"Of course I slapped you. You fell asleep, you were snoring for Ra's sake, how else was I supposed to wake you up?"

Ryou thought about arguing the point further, but logic and Malik never did exactly go together well, so he just dropped it.

Besides, it _was_ rather rude of him. After all, Ryou had called out of the blue and Malik had still managed to arrange for them to meet privately. Malik sent off Marik to spend the day with Bakura just so they could talk privately and even made him tea.

"Sorry," he whispered, "I haven't got much sleep lately. Too much last minute Christmas shopping."

Malik snorted.

"You and this holiday, I swear," Malik shook his head, "It's just about buying people junk they'll never use, yet you put so much effort into this."

"You don't understand," Ryou sighed, "…It's a culture thing."

"It's a _Ryou_ thing."

Ryou frowned.

"Is it wrong to try my best to give things to the people I love?" he asked.

Malik glared.

"Well, when you say it like _that_."

Ryou leaned back in his chair and took in Malik's kitchen. For an apartment populated by Malik and Marik it still surprised him how clean it was.

"You're going to come over for Christmas, right?" Ryou said hesitantly, "If only for a moment?"

Malik looked bored.

"Yes, Ryou. It's not like we have anywhere else to go but your place."

Ryou smiled and sipped his tea. (Though it probably wasn't the tea that warmed him.)

"So why did you call this little meeting? I mean, yeah it gave me an excuse to kick Marik out but now I'm going to have to spend the rest of the day worrying if he's killed anyone," Malik said.

"I know the feeling," muttered Ryou.

"But, seriously," Malik's eyes hardened a bit, "Whatever it is you need to say, say it."

There a long stretch of silence. Then, slowly Ryou grasped for the words.

"I have a… problem."

Malik, again, got that bored look on his face. He must have been expecting something grand.

"Don't you always?"

"I'm serious," Ryou whined and put down in his cup for dramatic effect.

Malik eyed him askance, and suddenly slightly interested.

"Bakura hasn't gone crazy again, has he?"

"What? No, no. He's fine…I mean, well, fine for him…but I do have a problem…about him," Ryou stuttered out.

"Just spit it out, Ryou."

"I don't know what to buy him for Christmas."

(Wow. When he said it out loud it certainly seemed a lot less epic.)

There was silence.

Malik just looked at Ryou. Waiting.

"…That's it?" he said finally, "That's your problem?"

Ryou blushed but nodded.

Malik laughed.

"Your big problem is that you don't know what to get Bakura for Christmas?" he laughed again, "And here I thought it was something life changing like…I don't know…he punched you in the face or murdered some flight attendant or you were falling in love with him…"

"No! It's none of those things. He's perfectly sane…except for the stealing, but even that's gone down a bit," Ryou paused, "Wait. What was that last one?"

(Malik just smirked.)

Ryou shook his head.

"Regardless," he said, "You have to help. I just don't know what to get him."

Malik thought for a second.

"You could get him a knife. He likes knives."

Ryou looked at Malik incredulously.

Malik sighed, "Yeah, on second thought that really isn't such a good idea…"

Both boys contemplated for some time.

"Holy Ra, this really is hard," Malik muttered.

"I know!" Ryou said, "I don't know what I can get him that will make him happy!"

"Yeah," Malik agreed, "He doesn't really have a lot of Christmas approved hobbies."

That was exactly it. Bakura, well, he really only had three interests. Knives, stealing and general sadism. Ryou condone none of the above. (And he couldn't even wrap the last two.)

"You're not going to get Marik anything for Christmas?" Ryou asked, hoping that maybe Malik's answer would help him find his own.

Malik chuckled. "Heh. Yeah. I'm bestowing onto him my presence. That should be the only gift he needs."

Ryou heaved a sigh. That was no help.

Yuugi probably couldn't help him either. He could just get the Pharaoh a new pack of Duel Monsters or something. Ryou couldn't even do that. His yami no longer had interest in the game. As Bakura had so eloquently put it 'What's the point if no one loses their soul?'

Ryou buried his face in his hands.

"What I'm supposed to do Malik?" he mumbled.

Malik awkwardly patted Ryou on his head.

"Nothing. You're screwed."

-0-

Ryou felt a punch to his gut. When he opened his eyes, Amane's face stared back at him.

"Get up, get up! Ryou! It's Christmas!" she screamed and began to shake his bed.

Ryou grumbled some gibberish in response.

Without so much as another word, Amane grabbed Ryou by the wrist and dragged him out.

"Come on, Mom said we could open -"

Amane stopped dead in her tracks. Her mouth dropped in wonder. Not at all the pretty presents with bows under the tree. But at the tall man, kissing their mother on her cheek.

"Daddy?" Amane whispered.

He smiled.

"Daddy!" Amane shouted and hurled herself into her father's arm. He laughed heartily. Then he scooped her up in his arms and spun her around.

"How's daddy's little girl?" he asked and gave her kiss on the check. She giggled.

Ryou hadn't moved from outside his bedroom door.

(He just…stared.)

"You…came?" he said.

His dad smiled at him and wrapped his arms around him.

"Of course."

-0-

"Hey! Ryou-kun? Ryou?" said a sing-song voice, and then gentle poking.

"Yuugi-kun?" Ryou asked and rubbed his eyes, "Did I fall asleep?"

(Again?)

Yuugi smiled, "Yeah. Just for a little bit though."

"Sorry," Ryou said quickly.

"Its fine," Yuugi assured him, "You look like you needed some sleep."

A small pink blush came over Ryou's cheeks.

"It's almost Christmas, everything is a little hectic," Ryou said.

Yuugi nodded.

"I know. I had to pull so many extra shifts for Grandpa because of all the last minute shoppers. Not to mention having to shop for everyone. It was so…hard!" Yuugi said exasperated.

"Tell me about," Ryou murmured, staring at the fresh snow from outside the window.

With everything (college, demented other halves) Yuugi and Ryou hardly ever spent time together. Now was one of the rare moments were they had crossed paths. Both he and Yuugi had stumbled upon each other at the library.

It was so nice, just saying Yuugi again.

Ryou missed hanging out with him. His presence was so warming.

"Yuugi?" said Ryou, slowly working up the courage.

"Hmm?"

"Um…what are you getting the Phar-…Yami for Christmas?" stuttered Ryou.

Yuugi's eyes went wide and his whole face turned red.

"I don't know yet," Yuugi admitted and laughed shamefully, "What are you getting Bakura?"

Ryou blanched.

"I don't have the slightest clue."

Suddenly, without warning or signal, they both started to laugh. The laughed died out eventually and they sat in silence for a moment. It wasn't awkward. There was to much happiness radiating off the both of them (just from the contact) for it to be awkward.

"So," Yuugi said with a grin, "when are you coming over for Christmas dinner? I was thinking you should come around six, the food should be done by then."

Ryou blinked. (His heart thumped rapidly.)

"We're invited?" he asked, the words sort of just slipping out of him.

Yuugi's eyebrows furrowed, both hurt and slightly offended.

"Of course you two are," Yuugi said, "its Christmas and I want all of my family to be there."

Ryou tilted his head, and then smiled so hard it hurt.

"We'll be there!"

-0-

The store was packed to the brim, and various limbs shoved Ryou into shelves.

Not that Ryou thought it would be different; it was Christmas Eve after all.

And he still hadn't gotten Bakura a gift! Well of course, a few very small ones. A new trench coat, for one. But not the gift. The gift that was more than a present, but had meaning. If there was any person Ryou knew who deserved a gift like that, it was the other half of his soul.

Something shimmered in the corner of his eye. Turning, Ryou saw the shining glass of a snow globe. He sighed as disappointment washed over him. Ryou had been hoping for a miracle, not a snow globe. Honestly, what would Bakura do with a snow globe?

But nevertheless something compelled Ryou to look at it further. He picked up the snow globe, the last on the shelf, and gasped.

It looked like…(Kul Elna) a small village in Egypt. Besides the snow (no wonder this snow globe on the shelf, who would believe snow in an Egyptian village) it was so realistic. The pottery, the people bargaining, the children playing…

(Something tugged Ryou at the bottom of his stomach.)

Should he get this? Would it be right?

Ryou closed his eyes and thought. Something clicked.

When forgiveness came, hadn't Bakura said he remembered the good times of his home?

(The warmth?)

Ryou, with a sad smile, put the snow globe in his cart.

-0-

"Merry Christmas!" Ryou exclaimed brightly. All the joy left his face when he saw that Bakura had put on his coat and was heading out the door.

Ryou took a step back, cringing.

"Are you," he paused, something caught in his throat, "going somewhere?"

Bakura first looked at the door, then Ryou.

"The Ishtars," he said, devoid of any emotion.

Ryou's shoulders slumped and his eyes were glued to the floor.

(He always ended up alone on Christmas…)

"But why?" he gasped out.

Bakura gazed at him, something hidden in his eyes.

"I'll leave only if you want me too."

Ryou exhaled loudly the breath he was holding in. Some lightness returned to his face.

"Of course I want you to stay," he said and reached out for Bakura's hand "I don't want to spend Christmas with anyone else."

Bakura paused and for once his eyes looked…warm. Then, he closed his eyes and smirked.

"Are you sure, yadonushi? You might just change your mind…"

"What are you talking about?" Ryou asked and his eyebrows creased. Of all days for his yami to return to his overly cryptic ways, he had to choose _Christmas_!

Then, a knock on the door.

The blood drained from Ryou's face.

(He trembled.)

"You didn't…" Ryou said, butterflies flapping in his stomach.

Bakura snorted and crossed his arms.

"This is what you wanted, isn't?"

Ryou's mouth dropped as yet another knock came.

"But _how_?"

Bakura cocked an eyebrow and smirked.

(He didn't even need an answer.)

Another knock.

"You should probably answer the door, yadonushi," Bakura said, with his slight arrogant tone. He walked towards the window.

"Wait!" Ryou called out, "Didn't I tell you I wanted you to stay?"

Bakura, for the first time Ryou ever saw, looked genuinely surprised.

"It's Christmas. And I want to spend it with my family. _All_ of my family."

Ryou smiled, and Bakura returned it.

Hands still shaking, Ryou reached for the doorknob.

To his surprise, two arms wrapped around him. They pulled him into a tight embrace. Well, it was more of clutch than anything, really.

(But all the same…)

"Merry Christmas, Ryou."

* * *

A/N Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone!

HEY GO VOTE IN THE POLL ON MY PROFILE.

You should leave me a review for my Christmas present. =D


	62. Of Second Chances and New Years

A/N Post-series.

* * *

_Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right. ~ Oprah Winfrey_

* * *

It was over.

The fear, the loneliness, and more literally, the year.

Ryou smiles and his friend's chatter fades into the background. Everyone, himself included, was looking up into the sky (bright fireworks exploding in the air) waiting for the new year to begin.

He looks forward. (For once, and refuses to ever look back again.) Fate has given him everything he ever dreamt of, including a second chance. He would not waste it.

Ryou would atone for the spirit's sins.

(And his own.)

They all look up as the grand finale bursts into the air. A mess of sparkles and colors.

Ryou takes this opportunity to really see what's around him.

Yuugi. Anzu. Honda. Jou.

He can't believe it. Any minute now, he's sure he'll wake up from this dream. (And the ring will be back around his neck and he'll have to hurt them all over again…)

Ryou blinks. But they'll still there. Surrounding him are familiar faces, who smile back at him, who (even after all he did) stayed by his side.

Friends.

"I love fireworks," Yuugi says, "The perfect ending to the year, right?"

Ryou nods in agreement.

(He couldn't ask for a better ending.)

* * *

A/N HAPPY NEW DECADE EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =DDD

Hey, I'm running low on quotes, so if anyone has some to offer, put them in your review! You get your name nice and bolded on the chapter. ^_^

(Also** last chance** to vote in my **poll**, located at my author page, **for the next chapter**. So go do it!)

Review?


	63. Domino High

Super mega thanks to the amazing Fiver, who beta this chapter. (And if you're not doing it already, you should all totally read her current fic Homecoming. It's awesome.)

* * *

_It is no use lying to one's self. ~ Henrik Ibsen_

* * *

All the students were whispering about a 'new student'.

Bakura was trying his hardest to ignore them.

Like he gave a damn about a new student. The pathetic students of Domino High were numerous enough.

But a certain boy would not allow that. Someone kicked the back of Bakura's seat. Malik, as usual, demanding attention.

"What?" Bakura sneered as he whipped around.

Malik smirked and pointed towards the front of the classroom.

Bakura, still sneering, turned his attention to their teacher.

"Class," she said, with an all-too-big smile. What could she possibly be so happy about? She was teaching high school students.

(And not the regular kind either.)

"I'd like to introduce our new student, Ryou!"

A small, very scrawny-looking (…boy? That was a boy, wasn't it?) well, boy then, emerged from the shadows. He clung to his book like a child would cling to a blanket, and kept his eyes on the ground. Bakura had him summed up in an instant.

Weak. Scared.

But what caught him off-guard, (which never happened, because he was always prepared, always) was the fact that this…boy, probably…looked almost identical to him. Ryou had the same snowy white hair, except his was much better groomed than Bakura's. The boy even had brown eyes.

"I didn't know you had a twin, Bakura," Malik whispered to him, and then laughed.

Bakura didn't even have enough energy to tell Malik to shut the hell up.

If the whole creepy identical thing wasn't bad enough, the boy was hiding something too. It burned in his eyes.

Bakura's gaze fell to the boy's feet. He brought shadows with him. Hungry shadows. They swarmed at his ankles.

By instinct alone, Bakura grasped his knife.

This boy was trouble. Every inch of him knew it.

Ryou looked up, as if startled by something. They met each other's gaze.

Bakura glared.

-0-

Well, he had had worse starts to a new school than this Domino High. Which really wasn't saying much given the fact that, well…

(It always returned to the past, his mind always returned to old wounds.)

Ryou shook his head. It had been a good day, so far. The students were all very nice to him, especially the girl he'd seen all morning, Miho.

He took a package of pudding on his tray. Ryou knew he wasn't hungry, but didn't want the other students to think of him weird so fast.

Across the cafeteria, a voice called out to him.

"Hey, Ryou-kun! Come sit with us!" said a boy Ryou had seen all day, but only officially met last period. Yuugi.

Ryou's mouth made a small o-shape.

He couldn't believe it.

(Usually, they were polite, but they could at least subconsciously fear it…him.)

He shouldn't. He knew he shouldn't. But against his better judgement, he sat down across from Yuugi. The table was already full, and he knew most of their names. Anzu, Jounouchi, Honda, and even Miho sat at the edges.

Yuugi smiled, and then returned to his conversation.

(Ryou didn't mind. It was easy being with him.)

-0-

Someone was following him.

The shadows told him so.

Every time he flicked them out (they were hungry, always hungry, so they never disobeyed), they hit on something. Someone, actually. They bounced the shadows back to Ryou, wounded and broken.

Ryou clutched his grocery bags tighter. That was wrong, very wrong. The only thing that could defeat shadows was stronger shadows.

The wind rustled through Ryou's hair (it called to him, whispered to him…)

He dropped his bags.

(Ryou ran the rest of the way home.)

-0-

"Bakura? Hey, Bakura!" Malik yelled and snapped his fingers.

Bakura rolled his eyes, "What?"

"You didn't pay attention to anything I just said, did you?"

"Not a single word."

Malik muttered a few obscenities under his breath.

"What has gotten into you lately?" Malik sneered, "Every time I talk to you, you're either moping or glaring off into space. I mean, I know that's kind of your thing or whatever, but this is taking it to a new extreme."

Bakura honestly had no idea what Malik had just said. Something more important had caught his eye. It was that cursed Ryou boy (or whatever the hell his name was) again. He always sat on that same bench in that same perfect parkacross from Meushi Diner. Even though the boy had only been at school for a week now, every day he sat on that bench.

He was so…innocent too. It was kind of sickening. Yesterday, he fed the ducks. Ducks. Bakura had almost gagged right then and there.

He and Malik sat in the booth closest to the window, so Bakura could see everything that Ryou did. (It was purely a coincidence that they chose that particular booth. Both he and Malik liked windows.) Besides, the boy wasn't even interesting to watch. Mostly he just sat there.

It wasn't like Bakura wanted to watch the boy or anything. And he most certainty wasn't stalking him. Why would he? He didn't care about the boy either way, and wasn't at all interested about the shadows circling him (or what made him run away in fear a couple of days ago...) Honest.

"Bakura? Hey, Bakura!" Malik shouted, snapping his fingers in Bakura's face.

"What?" replied Bakura dryly.

Malik's face settled into a grimace, "You didn't pay attention to anything I just said, did you?"

"Not a single word."

-0-

It was almost too good to be true.

Only a week since he started, and lunch was so much…fun.

Jou and Anzu would always bicker, with amusing results. Honda would try unsuccessfully to get Miho to notice him. And Yuugi…Yuugi was perfect.

"Look at this new game Grandpa gave me!" Yuugi exclaimed, pulling a large wooden box out of his backpack.

"Game?" Ryou whispered to himself, ears perking up by instinct alone.

"Yeah," Yuugi said happily, "Do you like games Ryou-kun?"

"I love games!" Ryou blurted out, probably a little too loudly. Never in his life had he met anyone who ever even thought of games…

Yuugi grinned.

(And here Yuugi was all-perfect and everything Ryou always wanted.)

"Would you like to come over and play sometime?" he asked.

Ryou nodded, and a huge smile stretched over his face.

-0-

Bakura crossed his arms and glared.

That boy (the one that, for no apparent reason, looked just like him) was with that good-for-nothing cheating 'King of Games' bastard's brother. And he was smiling like an idiot.

Bakura growled under his breath. Did the self-proclaimed King of Games know something he didn't? Why would he allow Yuugi to get close to him?

"Wow," said a slightly arrogant voice behind him. Malik.

He gave Malik a quick glance and then returned his eyes to Ryou.

Malik snorted, "Good God, Bakura. I always knew you were a narcissist but this is just taking it to a whole new level."

"What are you talking about?" Bakura sneered, but he never let the white-haired boy disappear into the crowd of students.

"You like him," Malik said accusingly, almost like a child.

Bakura blinked. His teeth clenched together. "What?"

"Oh, don't deny it!" Malik snarled, "Look at the way you're looking at him – that Ryou in our first and sixth period."

"You're delusional."

Damn it. He'd lost track of him.

Malik snorted again, a habit he had whenever he got upset.

"I've known you all my life. I can tell. You're not as hard to read as you'd like to think, Bakura."

He glared, "I don't like him."

"Ha! Really? Then why were you staring at him?" Malik said, crossing his arms.

"I wasn't staring at him. I was waiting here at my locker for you, like I always do, and he happened to pass by."

So. That was a complete lie.

"That's a complete lie," Malik said flatly.

Bakura licked his teeth. Malik wouldn't understand. He was only watching the boy for Malik's own protection. (Those shadows clung to that boy, even in the sunlight. And worst of all, behind his soft, smiling exterior, he knew it too.) Last time this school had shadows Malik had…well…

Well, it wouldn't happen again.

After all, Bakura was always prepared.

"Don't you think if I liked him, Malik, I would have talked to him by now?" Bakura asked, raising an eyebrow.

Malik opened his mouth to give some smart aleck retort, and then closed it. Apparently, Malik could sense logic after all.

"Furthermore, why would I have stood here waiting for you, when I could have simply talked him right now? Wouldn't I be with him? Because miraculously, Malik, I'm right here, next to you, instead."

The lavender-eyed boy glared for a second.

"You're still lying," Malik said simply, "but also making a lot of sense. It's…really weird."

Bakura, for what felt like the thousandth time that day, rolled his eyes.

"Stop being so stupid. It's getting on my nerves."

Malik frowned as if he wasn't quite sure whetherhe accepted Bakura's explanation or not, but then sighed.

"I really hate you, you know that?"

This time, it was Bakura's turn to snort.

-0-

This was the first time Ryou had ever been excited about going to school. Ever. In his life.

Last weekend with Yuugi-kun had been so much fun. Ryou had got so lost in the game; he must have not realized he'd over-stayed his welcome. Yuugi's grandfather had to kick him out, saying that Yuugi didn't feel well.

But Yuugi had been smiling the whole time…

So his grandfather had probably just wanted Yuugi to go to bed. Right? His stomach did cartwheels and Ryou had to close his eyes. He always over-thought things.

(He forced himself to calm down, and the shadows retreated.)

Ryou walked swiftly to the school's main office, the one that had the big bright blue DOMINO HIGH sign on it. Suddenly he heard a voice. Without even realizing what he was doing, Ryou hid within the shadows.

"Yuugi," said a deep voice, powerful but caring.

It was only then that Ryou noticed Yuugi, standing by the corner of the brick building.

He looked…horrible. Yuugi's once vivid violet eyes were dim, almost translucent. He panted and was sweating; even from the distance Ryou was at he could see. Yuugi's skin was a pasty white color, he looked sick. He looked dead.

But as shocking as Yuugi's appearance was, the man who spoke his name was even more startling. They were almost identical. Hair (tri-colored and all), eyes, everything. Only this man looked about ten years older, and had much better posture.

"Yuugi," the man repeated, tilting his head to one side.

"Atemu?" Yuugi whispered. (It was a miracle Ryou heard that.)

The man, Atemu, gave a pained smile, "I've missed you. Where were you last night?"

"I was with a friend," Yuugi said, but by the look on his face each breath pained him.

"Who?" Atemu asked, narrowing his eyes. From this angle, Ryou noticed they almost looked red…

"A boy. His name's Ryou."

"Is he…this Ryou," Atemu spat Ryou's name with more venom than Ryou had ever heard, "the reason why you didn't hunt with me last night? Or at all?"

Realization lit up Yuugi's eyes.

"How did you –?" Yuugi asked, at a loss for words.

"Look at yourself," Atemu said harshly, "How could you let this happen?"

"I don't know!" Yuugi bellowed, and for the first time Ryou saw true pain in his eyes.

(Ryou swallowed hard.)

"It's just that…I haven't had that much fun since…since I was…"

Yuugi trailed off, tears about to burst from his eyes.

Atemu eyes turned to slits.

"Who is this boy, anyway? How do you know he wasn't sent here to –"

"Oh, Atemu don't say that!" Yuugi scorned, "If you met him, you'd see. He couldn't hurt a fly."

A small blush illuminated Ryou's cheeks, quickly followed by a bitter taste flooding his mouth.

(How could he have done this to Yuugi? Lied to him?)

"And he won't know about any of this!" Yuugi said again, with more confidence than Ryou knew he was capable of, "None of them can know…"

A small flame burned in Ryou's heart. Perhaps he and Yuugi were more of kindred spirits than they thought.

"Aibou," said Atemu with large, worried eyes, "Why are you doing this to yourself?"

Yuugi looked down and bowed his head.

"I don't want to be a monster."

-0-

Lunch came too quickly for Ryou's taste.

Yuugi wasn't at the table. (He'd figured as much.)

But nevertheless, when Ryou sat down, he turned to Anzu.

"Where's Yuugi?" he asked, trying his best to sound genuinely curious.

"Oh, he went home," Anzu said, "You should have seen him, Ryou. I've never seen him look so sick in his entire life."

Ryou scanned the table. Someone else was missing too.

"Where's Miho?"

Anzu grimaced.

"I don't know," she admitted, "I'm really worried. She hasn't answered any of my calls, and I haven't heard from her since Friday."

The back of Ryou's neck tingled.

(Dread filled his stomach.)

He picked up his tray and turned to leave.

"Where are you going?" Anzu asked.

"Oh, I have to finish up some homework before science next period," said Ryou lightly.

"Okay, see you tomorrow, Ryou!"

"Goodbye, Anzu."

Ryou fled out of the small cafeteria and into the long hallway, packed on every wall with thick blue lockers with the paint peeling off.

He needed to find Yuugi. And Miho. Something was wrong. In his gut, in the deepest part of his soul, Ryou knew something was wrong.

The tray flew from his hands, and Ryou's face crashed into the floor. He groaned, and looked up to see a figure with tan skin and blonde hair. His face was solemn, and his eyes harsh.

(Pure hatred.)

"S-sorry," Ryou stuttered, suddenly shivering.

The boy snorted and turned away.

"You should be more careful about whose toes you step on," he said.

The tingle that before was only on his neck travelled down his entire body.

Yes, he had to find Yuugi and Miho.

(Fast.)

-0-

Ryou really needed to learn how to break rules. Even though he was sure Yuugi was in danger (no, he didn't have any proof, he just felt it…), when the bell rang, his legs walked him into Mr. Takahashi's classroom.

He buried his head in his hands.

At least it was the last period of the day. Then he could spend the whole afternoon finding them. (And be so relieved when they were both safe and sound, and that conversation Ryou had overheard was nothing more than a misunderstanding…)

"Class, today's lab will require you to work in partners," Mr. Takahashi said. Immediately, everyone locked eyes with their partners.

Ryou sighed. He was kind of glad, though, in a way. Being the odd one out meant that he wouldn't have to pretend he was okay.

"Not so fast, kids. After the last labs incident," he shot a glare at the table at the back. Ryou briefly glanced over his shoulder.

It was that boy, with the blonde hair and lavender eyes. And…

Ryou blinked.

A boy who had white hair. Just like he did.

Ryou massaged his temples. (Just when he thought things couldn't get any weirder.)

"I will be choosing partners for you," Mr. Takahashi finished.

Unanimously, all the students jeered.

After most of the class had been paired up, Mr. Takahashi pointed his long fingers at Ryou. He froze.

"Ryou, you are with Bakura. Sakura, you're with Akane," he continued on and on.

Again, Ryou sighed. He had a headache and his heart hurt and the last thing he wanted to do was worry about a partner. Especially someone he didn't know. (Ryou never had strong social skills.)

A few moments passed and Ryou realized that Bakura, apparently, was not the type to come to his partner. With yet another sigh, Ryou picked up his books and hauled them to the only empty table available.

Bakura drummed his fingers on the table and scowled.

Wow. He looked even more like Ryou up close.

(Again, dread festered in Ryou's stomach.)

He'd never once seen this boy on campus, (at least not that Ryou remembered) and already it seemed like Bakura hated him.

Ryou's eyebrows furrowed.

It didn't matter. Yuugi didn't hate him; it should be Yuugi he was talking to right now. What if he was really in trouble? What had that man, Atemu, been talking about? Hunting? The only creatures Ryou knew that hunted were –

No.

That was impossible. There was no way that Yuugi was a –

"What? What is it?" Bakura asked, his voice getting a little higher and more panicked.

Ryou came back to reality, "I'm sorry?"

Bakura glared.

"Don't play games with me. What the hell was that?" he sneered.

"I don't…I don't know what you're talking about," Ryou said, bewildered.

Bakura stared at him, his eyes burning like cigarettes.

(Ryou looked away.)

His stare lingered for a second, and then he settled back in his chair.

"You don't have parents." It wasn't a question.

"How did you know that?" Ryou asked, eyes widening.

Bakura shrugged. "Lucky guess."

Ryou frowned. That was way too lucky.

"How do you survive? You don't work." Another lucky guess.

"My father…left me enough money to survive when he died."

"You're lying," Bakura said.

"I'm not!" Ryou retorted, a bit flustered. (He was only half lying, and he wasn't about to tell the whole truth to a complete stranger, even if the stranger could be his twin…)

"Why do you care anyway?" Ryou asked, trying to at least pretend he was listening to Mr. Takahashi's instructions.

"I don't," Bakura snarled, very defensively.

Wait, what? Defensively?

A moment of silence passed.

"How old are you?" asked Bakura.

"Sixteen," Ryou replied automatically. Then he shook his head. What was with all the questions? He half-expected Bakura to ask him what his favorite color was, or favorite ice-cream flavor.

"What is with you and that park?" Bakura sneered, though his eyes betrayed genuine curiosity.

Ryou was taken aback, "Sorry? What?"

"I saw you at the park once…or twice," he said nonchalantly, "Why?"

"I like the park," Ryou said, almost wistfully, "It's so quiet and peaceful. I can close my eyes and pretend like nothing's wrong. And there's always enough sunshine so I never have to worry about shadows –"

Ryou stopped himself. He could not believe he just said that. To this boy he met no less than ten minutes ago! He almost…he almost let it slip about… Ryou mentally slapped himself. Of all things… (But he couldn't help it. Not really. Words just blurted out when he was around Bakura…like there was nothing to fear.)

Nothing to fear.

Ryou looked up at Bakura, with wide eyes. He looked just as confused as Ryou felt.

"I mean, it's not like you can be worried about shadows," Ryou quickly tried to cover up his slip, "They're just shadows and –"

"Ryou."

(The tingles were back.)

"Yes?"

"You're a terrible liar."

Ryou, softly, hesitantly, smiled.

(The shadows behind them grew in their anger.)

-0-

Ryou waited patiently by his locker as all the other students dispersed.

It was a long shot, but maybe Honda would help him look for Miho (and Yuugi). It was blatantly obvious, after all, that Honda liked her. Two heads were better than one, right?

(And he didn't want to be alone, not now, not in this…)

The big clots of students had vanished, so Ryou walked towards Honda's locker. Honda and Jou always stayed a couple of minutes after the bell.

"Atemu, I told you I'm fine now. I want to see my friends."

A voice, sweet and almost childish. Yuugi!

Ryou just about nearly flew into Yuugi's arms, when his intuition stopped him. Atemu.

Maybe, if he was quiet, he might be able to learn once and for all if…if…if Yuugi was a vampire. Ryou knew that Yuugi would never tell him (after all he could never tell Yuugi what he was…), so this could be his only chance.

For the second time, Ryou faded away into the shadows.

"Yuugi," said Atemu, dead serious, "I don't think you should be getting so close to them. It's dangerous."

Yuugi looked away, "They would never hurt me. I know it."

"That may be true," Atemu said, gently placing a hand on Yuugi's shoulder, "But can you guarantee the same?"

"How can you say that?!" Yuugi exclaimed, whipping around, and his eyes were filled with tears.

Atemu's eyes trembled a bit, but he remained firm.

"It's the truth. You can't deny what you are, Yuugi."

"I can try," Yuugi muttered.

"Would you please come to your senses?" Atemu almost yelled, for once losing his calm demeanor, "Do you know how much it pains me, having to see my brother suffer like this?"

Ryou's eyes widened. Brother?

Yuugi recoiled. "I'm sorry."

Atemu opened his mouth to say something but then something caught his eye.

He turned around and for a second Ryou swore that Atemu was staring right at him. However, his eyes travelled further down the hall.

"Bakura," Atemu growled, saying the name like it was some ancient curse.

Ryou turned around, and saw both Bakura and that blonde-haired boy…Malik? Was that his name?

Bakura's face twisted into a sneer.

"You," he snarled.

"Yuugi," said Malik, curtly. His arms were crossed.

"Oh, hi, Malik. Bakura," Yuugi greeted, but his voice was just as strained as Malik's. He took a few steps back like he was…like he was afraid.

(The tingles sparked on Ryou's body.)

"What are you two doing here?" Atemu asked, as his posture tensed.

"We go to school here," Malik said, rolling his eyes.

Bakura opted to just glare daggers at Atemu.

Ryou's head was spinning. How did Bakura know Atemu?

"Of course you two do. We have first period together!" Yuugi said, with an uneasy laugh. He grabbed a hold of Atemu's arm.

"It was nice talking to you both again but we were just leaving," Yuugi continued and jerked on Atemu's arm. He shook Yuugi off.

"I beat you once and I'd be more than willing to do it again, Bakura!" Atemu exclaimed.

"Ha!" Bakura said, voice echoing down the hall, "You cheated and you know it. Don't you think for a second that I won't gladly kill you right here and now –"

Malik pulled on Bakura's wrist, tugging him away from Atemu. He whispered something into Bakura's ear. It made him sneer and rip his hand away, but it did calm him down. A bit.

(The atmosphere still crackled from the unresolved hate between Bakura and Atemu.)

"Well, this was fun and all," Malik said and glared at Bakura, "but we have things to do. So you two will just have to schedule your little rematch later."

Before anyone could get another word in, a burst of energy swept through the halls. The lockers flew open, the ground shook, and Ryou fell to his knees.

"What was that?" Atemu muttered, as he struggled to his feet.

Ryou clutched his head. Every inch of his body screamed in agony, and a knife twisted into his spine…

"Ryou!" shouted Bakura, through gritted teeth.

"Ryou!" called Yuugi, horrified.

The boy in question looked up to find four faces staring at him. Whatever energy that was, it must have destroyed his shadows.

(That fact was even worse than the pain.)

Ryou strained to get up.

"Um, hi?" he said slowly, and leaned against the lockers. There wasn't enough strength in him to stand up.

Within the blink of an eye, Bakura had taken Ryou by his collar and pinned him to the lockers.

"I knew you had something to do with this," he whispered, more to himself than anyone else.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Ryou said calmly. Even though Bakura's eyes were black with rage, he wasn't afraid of him.

Bakura glowered at him.

"What did you do?" he hissed.

"Put him down!" Yuugi cried, rushing towards him, "He didn't do anything. He probably doesn't even know what you're talking about."

Bakura snorted, "He knows."

Ryou's eyes fell to the ground at that.

"Whatever just happened, that earthquake or blast or whatever, I didn't do that. I don't know what did."

Malik took a small, deliberate step towards them. His face had suddenly become three shades paler.

"Did you say…earthquake?" Malik's voice was hoarse and just barely above a whisper.

Yuugi gasped. He turned to Atemu.

"No…there's no way…Atemu, do you think?" Yuugi asked, frantically.

Atemu's face turned solemn.

"Get behind me."

Ryou clawed at the lockers, trying to pull himself up. To his left, Bakura stood in front of Malik, a knife in his hands.

"What's going on?" Ryou asked, through panted breaths.

A sharp bright light pierced his skull and Ryou fell to the floor yet again.

The sound of footsteps filled the hall. They were leisurely coming closer and closer in small, pain-inducing increments.

"Hello Bakura, weaker self. It's been a long time."

The figure strolled into their line of sight, and Ryou's mouth dropped. He looked just like Malik. Only, his blonde hair stood up more and his veins bulged out.

(His eyes too, his eyes were a purple abyss with no end…)

"Mariku," Atemu said as his eyes burned. Mariku didn't even look at him; his eyes were fixated on Malik.

"What? No greeting? Haven't you missed me?" he smirked, and sharp canine teeth were revealed.

Malik shivered. His skin had no color, and his pupils were dilated. He looked like he saw death.

Bakura moved in front of him even more and crouched in attack position. He chuckled darkly a bit.

"Sure. I'll give you a greeting. Why not? How's this – 'I'm sending you back to hell, where you belong?'" Bakura sneered.

Mariku laughed.

(Ryou's body exploded with those sharp, knife-like tingling sensations.)

"I see you are still pretending that you are something other than a complete failure," Mariku said.

Bakura growled.

"Some other time will have to suffice, though, Bakura dear. I wasn't brought back for you."

Mariku's eyes, big, disgusting, eyes turned to Ryou.

"So you are Ryou," he said, with a slight chuckle, "I've been looking for you."

He stooped down to Ryou, and brushed his hand across his face. Ryou cried out. His fingers burned with ice fire, and the sensation burrowed down deep into his body.

Realization flowed through his body. He's not going to kill me. He's going to destroy me.

"Get away from him!" yelled both Yuugi and Bakura.

Mariku ignored them.

"You are very difficult to find, especially for one so weak and pathetic. I thought I caught you once, but it was just some foolish girl. She wasn't as much fun as I thought she'd be," he mused and played with

Ryou's hair.

"Miho," Ryou whispered, "You killed her…"

"What?" Yuugi said, shaking his head. He didn't want to believe it.

Mariku smiled. It was worse than his smirk.

"You're clever. You sensed it, didn't you, that I was coming for you?"

Ryou glared. If he was going to die, he would die with dignity. He would not let this…darkness…play with him.

"Well," Mariku said with a small smile, "I hope you're much more fun than she was."

"Get away from him!" Yuugi roared as he grabbed Mariku by his arm and swung him into the other wall.

His fangs were bared, and his eyes were tinted red.

"Yuugi, what are you doing?!" Atemu cried as rushed to Yuugi's side.

Mariku opened his eyes and wiped a bit of blackish blue blood from the corner of his mouth.

"You two were always such a nuisance," Mariku said, for the first time without any trace of glee.

Atemu seemed to have anticipated what was coming next, as he scooped Yuugi into his arms.

Mariku waved his hand and the floor started to shake. Atemu and Yuugi's forms began to fade, and an invisible force pushed them through the wall.

"Yuugi," Ryou whispered. He didn't have the energy to scream.

Mariku stood up.

"There, now they're gone. It's only us."

Ryou's heartbeat sped up and he closed his eyes. For the first time in eight years he was…scared.

"Hmmph. You're not even going to put up a fight?" Mariku pouted.

Ryou opened his eyes.

No matter what, this thing (it didn't seem like a person, it didn't give off shadows like a person) was going to kill him. He refused to bend to all of its wishes.

"No."

Ryou's gaze turned to Bakura. His eyes were narrowed but he didn't look angry anymore. Just scared. He was frozen in front of Malik, unwilling to move, but there was something in his eyes that said…

Suddenly, a thought consumed Ryou. The expression seemed so familiar.

"Do I…know you?" he asked to himself.

Mariku followed Ryou's gaze and then laughed.

"So my weaker self was right after all! You do care about him, Bakura."

He giggled to himself as he pulled Ryou off the ground. Mariku trailed a sharp fingernail down Ryou's cheek. Ryou bit his tongue to keep from screaming.

Bakura glared, but made no movement.

Mariku tilted his head, "Fascinating. You don't care about him enough to save him, even though you do like him."

(That hurt more than it should have.)

"What do you want with him anyway?" Bakura grimaced.

Mariku smirked.

"I don't think it's me you should be asking."

Bakura's eyes widened a fraction and he turned to Malik.

"You. You summoned him?"

Ryou had never heard Bakura's voice so devoid of emotion. So cold.

Malik looked away. There wasn't a trace of arrogance about him. He wasn't even standing up straight.

"I didn't," a pause, "mean to."

Bakura flinched, as if someone just slapped him.

Ryou stared in horror. Why would Malik summon a monster that wanted to kill him? Is that why they looked so similar?

Well, if he was going to die, he might as well know why.

"Why would you want to kill me?" Ryou asked, as he wriggled in Mariku's grasp.

"He's jealous," Mariku told Ryou, "and he needs me to solve all of his problems. That's why I'm here. That's why I'm back."

"Jealous? Of what?"

Bakura's mouth dropped open.

"That's what you were jealous of?" Bakura said, just as confused as Ryou, "Because I was interested in him? Malik, you idiot! I was only watching him because he had demonic energy following him. I was thinking about protecting you! You ungrateful, selfish, little brat!"

"You were watching me?" Ryou blurted out, but nobody seemed to hear him.

Malik looked up at Bakura.

"Really?" He asked hopefully.

Bakura let out a growl of frustration.

"I can't believe I'm going to have to kill him again, just because of your stupidity."

Mariku laughed.

"What makes you think you can kill me again, Bakura? Atemu is not here with you."

"I don't need him," Bakura sneered.

"You know, I was going to play with him first," Mariku gave Ryou a shake, "and then kill you, and then kill him. But now, I think I'll make you watch."

He threw Ryou to the ground.

"Enough!" Bakura yelled and the knife he held in his hands glowed. Intricate deep blue lines emerged on the blade.

Mariku took a step back.

"That's not possible," he spat, "You're not a mage."

"I don't have to be to kill you."

Ryou looked up as Bakura charged at Mariku, nothing more than a blur of white hair and blue light. Mariku dodged, and his hands turned bright lavender, the color of his eyes.

"I've always wanted to know what your blood would taste like."

Bakura sneered, and attacked again.

Malik dashed over to Ryou and dragged him from the center of the hallway to the lockers.

"Are you alright?" he asked as he pulled Ryou into his lap.

Usually, Ryou wasn't one for sarcasm, but the occasion called for it.

"Lovely."

An orb of the same purple light blasted out of Mariku's hand and sent Bakura flying into the ceiling.

Mariku cackled and took a step towards Bakura, only for a slash of blue light to blow him away.

Malik pushed Ryou's face towards him.

"Look," he said, eyes empty, "If my darkness wins…"

"He won't," Ryou said instantaneously.

(Bakura would win. He was sure of it.)

"You don't know that!" Malik screeched, "You don't know anything. You don't know what he's capable of! No, you – you just waltzed into our lives and pretended to be so sweet and cute and innocent and completely ruined everything!"

Ryou blinked.

Malik closed his eyes.

"Look, please just listen to me, Ryou. Please. If he wins, I'm going…I'm going to reabsorb him."

"What?" Ryou hissed.

"He is my darkness. I'm a…I'm a mage, and he...he is what happens when I deny my powers. And my feelings. So if I…take him in…I'm sure he'll overpower me, the real me, but I'll weaken him. I'll weaken him enough so that you'll be able to kill me. You have to kill me. Promise."

Ryou stared, feeling lost and helpless and hurting more than he'd thought he'd ever have to again.

"Please," Malik begged.

"Okay. Promise."

Malik sighed.

"Thank you," he whispered.

They turned their attention back to the fight.

"No," Ryou murmured.

Mariku had Bakura pinned against the wall, and he was smirking triumphantly.

Bakura, on the other hand, looked barely conscious. He trembled and every second his eyes would close, only to shoot open and glare at Mariku.

No.

That tingling sensation devoured him, again. Bakura was going to die.

Because of Malik, because of him. Bakura – (he knew him, in another life or time, but he knew he had lost him before) gone. Destroyed for eternity. And Ryou would have to sit and watch, like the way he watched Yuugi being thrown aside (and the way he let Amane die…) Helpless, weak. Was he doomed to be

like that always?

No.

"No!"

Ryou (with strength borne from his soul, from the shadows) tore towards Mariku. Pain struck him in the center of his back, as two thick bat-like wings unfolded. They expanded, protecting Bakura. Shadows swirled at his ankles. He controlled them and they sent Mariku flying into the lockers. Blood seeped out of the sides of his mouth and the shadows crawled up his arms, binding him.

"Don't come any closer," Ryou warned, as his eyes turned black.

Mariku sat up stunned. No giddiness or superiority. He was the one afraid now.

"You! You're a –"

"Demon," Ryou finished for him, and clenched his fists.

Suddenly, Mariku threw his head up in the air and laughed.

(There was no humor in it.)

"Are you going to kill me, little boy?" Mariku snarled, "I don't think you can. You may be powerful, but I don't think you have the guts."

Ryou never got the chance to answer.

"He might not. But I do," Malik said, rising off the floor.

Mariku's stare turned to Malik. His eyes were wild.

"You'd betray me? After everything I've done for you?" he exclaimed, furious.

"You've done nothing," Malik sneered, "and you will do nothing."

The blonde-haired boy closed his eyes, and his hands glowed a faint lavender.

"I am a mage," he said surely, confidently (and with the slightest trace of arrogance), "You are nothing."

The lavender grew brighter, as the outline of Mariku blurred. Faded.

Disappeared.

(In his wake there was nothing but shadows.)

Malik opened his eyes. He smirked.

"Why didn't you do that five years ago, brat?"

Bakura. Ryou turned around and smiled. His wings folded back into his skin.

"I figured you'd like the challenge," Malik said, regaining his posture.

"I'm going to murder you in your sleep," muttered Bakura.

Malik laughed and ran over to Bakura's side. He hugged him. Bakura glared, but didn't push him off.

Ryou smiled. Lightly. (Sadly.)

"Ryou? Ryou, you're alright!"

"Yuugi!" Ryou exclaimed, turning around. A smudge of tri-colored hair, followed by a force that knocked him to the ground. Yuugi buried himself into Ryou's chest.

"You're alright!" he called out, "I'm so happy!"

Ryou wrapped his arms around Yuugi.

"Me too."

"Yuugi," said an amused voice. Atemu.

Blushing, Yuugi got off of Ryou.

"We have to go now, Grandpa's probably worried sick, but you have to come over this weekend for sure! We are going to have so much fun!" Yuugi paused, "Right?"

(As if to say, 'You don't mind if I'm a vampire, we can still be friends, right?')

Ryou nodded.

"Right!"

Yuugi grinned so widely that Ryou had to grin back. Even Atemu cracked a small smile. Yuugi ran off into the other's arms and they walked out of Domino High.

"Hey, Ryou," Malik said from behind him. His arms were crossed.

"Yes?"

Malik cringed.

"Look, this is really hard for me to say. Really, really hard…but I'm…um, well…I'm sorry. You know, for having a split personality that tried to kill you and stuff."

Ryou cocked a brow.

"It's alright," he paused, "I guess."

Malik sighed, "And I just wanted to say… thank you. If you hadn't flipped out and gotten your crazy demon thing or whatever on, I don't think I would have been able to stand up to him."

Malik looked up at him with shining eyes.

"Thank you so much."

Ryou smiled.

"But don't think this means I like you or we're friends or anything," Malik said hurriedly.

This time Ryou crossed his arms.

"Of course," he said, "I would never think that."

"Good. Because it would be totally wrong."

(Ryou laughed softly.)

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going home. I've got tons of math homework."

Ryou watched Malik leave, with a sort of bizarre fondness. He turned around, expecting to see Bakura, but the hallway was empty.

Where did he go?

Ryou turned down the hallway and then went up the stairs. It was then he saw the entrance to the roof. He pushed it up.

The sky was black and starless. It was at least midnight.

Wow, Ryou thought faintly amused, that fight must have taken longer than anyone would have thought.

Bakura was there, looking down at the city. The black trench coat he always wore was billowing in the wind.

"Hey!" Ryou said.

Bakura gave him a fleeting glance over his shoulder.

"Is there something you want?" Bakura said sharply.

"Are you…are you okay?" Ryou asked.

"I'm fine. Why?" he snapped.

"I'm worried about you," Ryou admitted. No use in hiding it anymore. He walked towards Bakura, who still regarded him with scorn.

"I was going to let you die to protect Malik. You know that, right?"

"I know," Ryou said simply.

"And?" Bakura said harshly.

"And I don't care."

Bakura just looked at him.

Ryou gave a small smile.

"I protected you because I wanted to. Not because I knew you'd do the same."

Bakura glared, "Malik was right. You are sickeningly sweet."

Ryou ignored that comment.

"You're just human, aren't you? Nothing supernatural," Ryou asked.

"How did you figure it out?" Bakura said, perplexed.

Ryou pointed to his arm, "You're bleeding."

Bakura touched his wound and his blood was crimson.

"Well, you are at least half-demon. So I guess that makes us even."

"I guess."

(The corners of Ryou's lips twitched, wanting to smile.)

A nice, drifting silence passed through them. It made sense, being here with Bakura. He didn't know why (and probably never would) but it didn't matter. They were friends.

"You can't stay here all night, you know," Ryou said.

Bakura snorted.

"…Thank you," he said. Out of the blue, with no explanations.

"Thank you," Ryou said back.

(I can do something after all, and I can be part demon and still be fully human…)

"You'll be at school tomorrow, right?" Bakura asked, trying to pretend that he didn't care.

Ryou laughed, and grabbed onto Bakura's hand.

"Yes. And the day that and the day after that…"

(Always.)

* * *

A/N In case you missed it, that last little section was heavy on references to the first chapter of A Single Line, Midnight Muses.

And this is the part where I get sappy. I just want to thank everyone who alerted, favorited, and REVIEWED (or and thank you to all the anon reviewers, especially to 'NW' who has reviewed a lot of chapters, I appreciate it!), over this last year. This has been such an amazing experience and I never in a million years thought I'd have over 400 reviews. You all have been so kind and supporting and I'm so grateful. Thank you.

Here's to a great past year and hopefully an even better new one. =D

(Also, highlights?)


	64. Unnoticeable

_The speed of the human mind is remarkable. So is its inability to face the obvious. ~ Simon Mawer_

* * *

Small things, at first. Little, unnoticeable things.

(Later, Ryou will look back and _realize_, wonder how he could have ever been so blind…)

But now. Now he simple walks home from school, and only vaguely notices the streetlamps flickering. Sometimes, in the distance, he hears someone calling his name… But no one is ever there. Ryou chalks it up to the ruffling of the leaves and his tired mind.

(Even now he's good at excuses.)

He opens the door to his apartment with little hassle. Ryou tosses his backpack to the side and reaches to remove the ring. A sharp sting bites at his skin (static shock, he tells himself), and his hand retreats. No harm in leaving the ring for a little bit longer…it's just a gift…

Ryou doesn't notice how much darker the room seems. (The shadows clawing up the wall…)

A gust of wind pushes past him. All of his windows are closed.

Ryou doesn't notice it now (shivers, but doesn't really _know_) but he will.

Besides, the shadows behind him can wait.

* * *

A/N Nice, short chapter. Reviews are loved!


	65. The Twelve Acts of Mercy

A/N Dedicated to **Spiritsong**! (Major thankies to Fiverfor betaing.)

And now back to your regularly scheduled program - angst. Warnings: Major AU (Because it's not clear in the story, Ryou's last name is not Bakura in this universe), Tendershipping, Angstshipping. Up to you to decide which, if any, of those are onesided. Yeah. It's that kind of chapter. Told anachronistically, each new section has a different date than the last.

* * *

_Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. ~ Maria Robinson_

* * *

-1-

Ryou awakens with a start, only to find his nightmare has not ended.

The alarm reads 7:16. The sun is shining too brightly.

He thinks about crying. He thinks about killing himself. He thinks about laughing.

(He thinks about murder.)

Ryou climbs out of bed with ease and switches off the alarm that is programmed to ring at 7:30. It is just a precaution; he has never slept long enough to see the alarm clock in action.

(Ryou is always too early.)

He, like a soldier, marches towards the bathroom to prepare for the battle ahead.

The losing battle.

-2-

Malik's unpredictability was what Ryou loved about him.

When they first met as children, it was the spontaneous, bold, adventurous spirit of Malik that had drawn the quiet and shy Ryou out his shell.

But now...

("You look like hell, Ryou. I mean, more than you usually do." Malik would say, twenty seconds after Ryou opened the door.)

Ryou, trembling, twists the doorknob. With every ounce of strength in him, Ryou does not run away at the sight. One desk fills the closet-sized room and stacks of paper are arranged on it neatly, in direct contrast to the newspaper clippings tacked to every inch of the walls, overlapping and some upside down.

Malik, sipping from his mug, looks Ryou up and down.

"You look like hell, Ryou," he says, "I mean, more than you usually do."

Ryou sighs.

"I know."

(_I know, I know, all of it, every piece of the puzzle..._)

"Even if I ask, you won't tell me, will you?" Malik asks half sadly, half resentfully.

Ryou shrugs, but there is a trace of a smirk on his face.

"What, no guesses?"

Malik glares at him, the same death stare he always gives whenever Ryou stops acting like the quiet and shy person he is supposed to be.

"I'm going to go out on a limb here and hope it was a bar fight. Or drug deal gone bad. You know, I'd even be happy with human trafficking."

Almost right. Bakura isn't unlike a drug.

"But it's not any of those things, is it?" Malik says, eyes narrowing.

Ryou shakes his head.

(The ghost of a smirk is back.)

"What do you see in him?!" Malik yells, his words laced with venom, "He's a criminal - not to mention the fact that he's a psychopath!"

(Sociopath is probably a more accurate description, but Ryou says nothing.)

Malik sees how unfazed Ryou is by his words. Deep in his purple eyes, something stirs. He is searching, searching for something that will tear through Ryou.

"And he doesn't love you."

Ryou feigns hurt, and holds back laughter.

(_What, do you really think I don't know by __**now**__? Do you think that I can't tell?! I hate him, __**I hate him**__-!_)

Malik's angry expression turns pained. He grabs Ryou's hand to stop the shaking.

"Look," Malik says, almost gently, "You know I only say these things because I-"

Ryou snatches his hand back.

"Don't we have a job to do?"

Malik glowers at him, his face radiating disgust, but he turns and rips a newspaper clipping off the wall.

"A little girl is missing. Dad's very...generous," Malik smirks, "Looks easy too. Probably some perv or a kidnapping thing. Shouldn't be too hard."

Malik hands him the article and again looks at the sorry state Ryou is in.

"I don't think you could handle hard."

(It's at this point that Ryou thinks about balling up that accursed article, pulling Malik roughly by his collar and demanding that they go some place far away, any place where he wouldn't have to wake up in that bed again- ...anything but that...)

"Ryou?" Malik says, snapping his fingers.

"Malik," Ryou pauses, "I..."

(_...need your help; I've needed your help for so long..._)

"What?"

Ryou stops.

("A coward through and through, aren't you?")

"I..." a pause, "...need some coffee."

Malik opens his mouth to say something, but then it twists into a snarl. He takes his coffee mug and shoves it into Ryou's chest.

So close to his face, the spark (the spark of hatred, of fury) is rekindled in Malik's eyes.

"If only Amane could see you now. She'd be so _proud_."

(Now that, that still hurt.)

Malik pushes past Ryou and out the door.

-3-

"What the hell was that?" Malik exclaims as he grips the edge of the train seat.

Ryou endures the slight turbulence without a second thought.

"I wish you wouldn't curse so much," Ryou mutters as he gazes out the window. Domino's few skyscrapers, never changing, shrink behind him.

Malik snorts, "We can't all be saints like you, Ryou."

"I'm not a saint."

(His voice trembles.)

"Then quit acting like one," Malik snaps, eyes blazing.

How long has he been holding that in? Ryou wonders. A lifetime?

"Amane wouldn't like you swearing so much."

Malik's eyes sizzle, but he says nothing.

(And it's at this moment Ryou realizes that Malik finally hates him.)

-4-

"Disgusting," Malik whispers at the sight.

The whores. The drugs. The dead bodies.

And, after hours of 'interviewing' and searching, they find her. Bloody, curled up in the dumpster, dead. The first time Ryou saw it, he threw up. The second time, he cried.

But now...

"Bastards," Malik mutters and drapes his coat over the little girl they had been hired to find. Find, not save. Never save.

Ryou trembles.

"Come on, Malik," he says, "Let's get her to some place safe."

Malik nods.

Ryou wonders what happens to the little girls who die like this. Do they go to heaven? Do they get to be happy?

Or do they become trapped in the moments of their misery?

(Forever.)

-5-

Bakura is there. Watching him.

This is the first day that he's seen it, but knowing him (Ryou clenches his fists) he has been watching for a long time.

Ryou refuses to acknowledge him and turns to Malik, who has the girl cradled in his arms.

You did this, Ryou thinks, shooting a glare towards Bakura.

This was all your fault.

-6-

The wounds change. Subtly, it's taken Ryou this long to notice, but they do. The wounds on her body change.

In a disgusting way it gives him hope.

-7-

"Are you…are you alright?" Malik asks, uncertain.

Ryou regards him coldly.

"I'm fine."

"I know it's hard…that girl looks so much like…and it brings back those memories…"

Malik sighs, and runs a hand through his blonde hair. He then places it on top of Ryou's hand.

"I'm here. You remember that, right? I understand."

Ryou shakes off his hand.

(You couldn't understand, no matter how many times I told you…)

-8-

"Ryou!" Malik shouts, just as Ryou is stepping off the train.

The white-haired boy looks back, surprised. Hopeful.

(Don't let me go, please don't let me go, Malik…)

"I swear, if I find out you talked to _him_, tomorrow I'm making you clean the office."

Ryou sighs. It was pointless to have hoped.

-9-

They don't say a word to each other today.

Ryou just follows him.

-10-

"You're so much more cooperative this way."

Ryou doesn't even bother to look at him.

Bakura wraps his arms around him and whispers in his ear.

"Three years have changed you, even more than I thought they would."

Ryou's posture tenses, but he doesn't fight.

"I hate you," Ryou says. No emotion. He's used up all of that.

"I don't care," Bakura snarls, appalled at the thought that he would.

(Softly, Ryou hears him whisper, "At least you're alive.")

The clock ticks, replacing the rhythm of Ryou's heartbeat.

Bakura clutches him tighter.

Ryou closes his eyes and sighs.

-11-

"You're not even sorry," Ryou hisses with all the venom he can muster.

Bakura is unfazed.

"For what?"

"About that girl. You could have saved her," Ryou accuses, disgust etched into his face.

What happens next is the last thing Ryou expected. Bakura laughs. Low and deep and bitter and without humor…

"I can't save anyone, Ryou," he says, still chuckling, "I thought you would have realized that by now."

The hairs on the back of Ryou's neck stand straight up. The hardwood floor creaks as he takes a step back, on pure instinct alone.

Bakura looks him up and down, amused by his fear.

"Are you afraid of me, Ryou? _Still_?"

Another laugh.

Ryou, sensing danger, turns to leave.

Bakura grabs his wrist.

"Don't go."

He is squeezing so hard, Ryou is certain he'll have a bruise when he wakes up tomorrow.

"Stay. Just for tonight."

Ryou is robbed of his words. Bakura is begging.

Mechanically, Ryou nods and sits back down.

He would find the girl's killer tomorrow. There was always tomorrow.

-1-

Ryou awakes with a start, only to find his nightmare has not ended.

("It's endless.")

To his side, the alarm reads 7:16.

All of the rest of his emotions die. Beautiful numbness begins to set in.

-2-

"You look like hell Ryou," says Malik, "I mean, more than you usually do."

Ryou freezes.

"Why did you say that?" he snaps wildly.

Malik snorts. "Because it's true."

Ryou shakes his head. Déjà vu. That's all.

"So," Ryou gives a forced smile, "What's our next case?"

-3-

"Sometimes I forget how beautiful it is," Ryou mutters, almost bitterly.

Malik looks over his shoulder and gazes out the train window.

He snorts.

"I can't believe you've kept your innocence, after all these years in our business, Ryou."

Ryou doesn't even acknowledge Malik's presence.

"The grass, after everything, stays so lush. The sky is always that same perfect shade of light blue. Reminds you of home, doesn't it? It reminds me of home, at any rate. Still the same, after all these years…"

Two streams of wet tears fall down Ryou's face. (He doesn't notice.)

"Ryou!" Malik yells, shaking him, "What's wrong with you?"

He laughs quietly.

"That's the thing Malik. I don't know."

-4-

Ryou covers his eyes. He doesn't want to have to see her again.

(Again and again and again…)

Shielding his sight doesn't stop him from shaking, though.

-5-

Poor girl, Ryou thinks as he weaves in and out of the alleyways, Malik at his side.

Every corner is stained with blood and shadows.

To think she had to lose her soul here…

They turn a corner, and a shiver travels down Ryou's spine.

He spins around, but there is nothing but shadows.

-6-

"Do you even notice?" Malik hisses, suddenly (though, not really, if Ryou looks at it in the scheme of things).

"Notice what?" Ryou asks.

"Don't lie to me Ryou. You _know_ exactly what I mean."

Ryou looks down. The girl's resemblance to Amane is uncanny.

(It makes his heart twinge, but not enough for any real emotion. Can he even feel any real emotion anymore?)

"_Well?!_" Malik screams. He's crying.

Ryou turns away. (Malik's never cried before, which means somehow, someway, _this_ has changed Malik…subtly, swiftly, without notice…?)

"I notice."

-7-

"Please tell me you're not going to see him again tonight, Ryou."

Ryou says nothing.

(Domino grows nearer and nearer in his window.)

Malik grabs Ryou's wrists and pulls.

"Promise."

His lilac eyes are hard and burn him worse than any fire ever could.

"I promise," Ryou says.

(What's one more lie upon thousands?)

Malik's hand lingers, but eventually retreats.

-8-

The train stops abruptly at an apartment complex that looks slightly crooked.

"Ryou," Malik says, any trace of arrogance gone.

Ryou looks at him longingly.

(_If only I could..._)

"Don't do anything stupid."

For once in two years, Ryou almost thinks he can smile.

-9-

"_You_."

_He_ emerges, arms crossed, scowling.

"Ryou."

Ryou hates the way _he_ says his name.

(And he hates the way it makes his heart–)

No.

What he said was unforgivable.

"What are you doing here?" Ryou says, trying his best to form words through his endless rage.

"We need to talk."

It was not a suggestion or a plea; it was a command.

(Ryou hates that too.)

"About what?" Ryou shouts, borderline hysterical, "What _else_ can you possibly say to me?!"

Bakura always knows how to break him. How to take the things that are fundamental to Ryou – his politeness, his good nature, his forgiveness – and obliterate them.

His scowl darkens, but Bakura doesn't open his mouth.

"_Well?_"

"You don't want to be alone tonight. Not after what happened," he pauses, searching for something, "And you're going to need…_proof_."

"How do you know about her?"

A smirk. "I know everything."

Ryou's head begins to throb. It always did when he was around Bakura.

His heart stops beating.

"Do you know who killed her?" Ryou asks, all his anger disappearing. He has to bring this girl's killer to justice. (He couldn't for Amane but maybe…)

"I have an idea," Bakura admits, but he doesn't meet Ryou's gaze.

"Tell me!" Ryou shouts, ecstatic, heart beating faster and faster.

"Come with me to my house."

"Fine."

(Ryou gives up so quickly, it's hard to tell if they were even fighting to begin with.)

Bakura's scowl doesn't change, but his features light up. He reaches out to take Ryou by his hand.

"Don't touch me."

He does, anyway.

-10-

"I hate you," Ryou snarls.

"But you come here every night," Bakura says, undaunted, "What do you think that says about _you_?"

Ryou clenches his fists and sinks back into Bakura's arms

-11-

"You will sleep here tonight."

Ryou agrees, only because it doesn't matter.

-1-

Ryou awakes with a start, only to find his nightmare has not ended.

He, slowly (the fear stuns him, paralyzes him) turns to look at the clock. In bright, red, scarlet red letters the alarm says 7:16. A loud, cracked sob bursts from his throat.

The sun glares down at him, filling his whole room with light.

Ryou could stay in bed. Maybe that, if he just refused to do anything…would change something.

(For better or worse, he didn't care at this point.)

He thinks, but nevertheless, marches to the bathroom to prepare for work.

Malik. Malik would help him. Malik would save him.

He turns the shower on and catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror.

Ryou's eyes are bloodshot; three long cuts are sliced on his left check. His right arm is covered with bruises.

All of him, every inch, is a wound that will never heal.

-2-

There Malik is, all golden and perfect and untainted.

Concern flashes through Malik's eyes. He closes them, and then takes a long drink from his coffee.

"You look like hell, Ryou," he sneers, "I mean, more than you usually do."

Ryou doesn't respond, and instead goes straight to the back wall and rips down the newspaper article.

A young girl with blonde hair and green (_Amane's_ green) eyes is pictured.

I'll save you this time, Ryou promises.

This time it will be different

-3-

"You're an idiot. Not even a naïve idiot, anymore, Ryou. Just an idiot," Malik sneers, "You know that, right?"

Naïve. No, he is still very naïve. But Bakura can't keep him in the dark forever.

(Can't keep him _here_ forever.)

"Ryou!"

"What?" Ryou says exhausted, "What do you want me to do?"

Malik's mouth drops open.

"Really? Is that really a question?"

Ryou nods.

"Dump him!" Malik shouts.

(Ryou doesn't even bother to point out that they're not together. The tone in Malik's voice suggests a rant is imminent and Ryou's known Malik long enough to know not to interject.)

"What part of that do you not understand? Look at what he did to your _face_! Not that – I mean, I like the way you look and everything – but, UGH – Ryou he _hurt_ you! How can you want to see him again?"

"I'm not going to talk to him again," Ryou lies.

"Yeah, right," Malik snorts, "The truth is written all over your face Ryou. You're like a stupid, pyromaniac moth to a flame."

Some silence.

Then quieter, "You're going to get burned, Ryou."

Ryou looks out the window as the train speeds ahead further and further to their preset destination and wonders if that's already happened.

-4-

She's dead. As always.

-5-

He feels someone watching. Ryou knows his there. But he can't do anything.

(...He won't even try.)

Malik doesn't notice, and cradles the poor dead girl in his arms. Right now, there is nothing else in Malik's world but this girl.

They are similar, he and Malik, in that way. They both have learned to ignore each others very existence.

-6-

"Whoever did that to her," Malik says, placing the body on the train, "We're going to find them. No matter what."

Ryou doesn't even have to agree.

-7-

"You hate me."

Malik gasps almost inaudibly, but then rolls his eyes.

"What gave it away?"

Ryou is unfazed by his sarcasm.

"It wouldn't mean anything if said I was sorry," Ryou says in a monotone. But his voice cracks.

He closes his eyes.

(I've said, I've said it so many times Malik, and each day, each second, you drift further away from me and I can't do anything…I can't…I'm sorry…but fate, my fate, it is…)

"Unavoidable, really," Ryou says, with a soft laugh, "I'm surprised it took you so long to mean it, to not forget tomorrow."

(His eyes remain closed.)

"I wish I could change it, Malik," his voice quivers, "But I can't. And I can't even tell you I'm sorry. But I am."

("More than you'll remember.")

"Ryou…" Malik says softly, "What are you _talking_ about? What is _wrong_ with you?"

He opens his eyes.

The train is grey. There is no color anymore.

Malik says more things; both with compassion and anger, but Ryou can't hear them anymore.

-8-

"Stay away from him," Malik practically begs.

"I can't," Ryou says, no longer afraid to admit it.

"I know you _can't_," Malik snaps bitterly, "But could you at least _try_?"

Ryou looks away.

"For me?"

Ryou gets off the train.

-9-

"You knew."

Ryou glares, shaking, trembling.

"You knew I could have been..." he trails off, not daring to say it.

"You could have _what_?" Bakura sneers.

"Been happy!" Ryou shouts, "I could have been happy with him."

Bakura snorts.

"You don't love him."

(He doesn't sound sure, though.)

Ryou stares at the place where Malik left, hoping with every inch of his being that he'll come back.

"It's time to go," Bakura snarls, stepping closer.

Ryou closes his eyes.

_Love_.

How naïve. How stupid.

(And it was love that started this mess, only fitting if it ended it…)

He turns around and faces Bakura.

"Then let's go."

-10-

Ryou clings to Bakura.

For the last time.

-11-

Midnight passes between them without another word.

-1-

Ryou awakes with a start, happy to find that his nightmare has ended.

(The nightmares plague him often, vivid images of the blood slipping out of his throat…and _Bakura_…)

Bakura.

He touches the bruises on his arm. They sting.

(Ryou's more disgusted then anything. He couldn't land one punch on Bakura.)

Wearily, he pushes himself out of bed. He needs to get ready for work. There were cases to be solved, people to find, and of course Malik…

Ryou does nothing less than a full body twitch. How could he ever explain this (them, more accurately) to Malik?

Goodness, he couldn't even explain this to himself…

He sighs, clutches his head, and heads for the bathroom regardless. There was work to be done.

-2-

"You look like hell, Ryou. I mean, more than you usually do."

He says nothing.

(Ryou has used up all his responses to that.)

"We got into a fight," Ryou says simply.

He fades away then. Ryou doesn't want to hear about _that_ girl. He's so sick of her.

-3-

They are seated next to each other, but the distance between them is great.

"Hey," Malik says, painfully slow, the way he always sounds when he's sorry.

("Sorry.")

"Yes?" Ryou says softly, even though they are the only passengers on the train.

"I didn't mean what I said," Malik pauses and looks away, "About Amane."

(_Liar. You did. You mean it now more than ever._)

"It's alright. I'm not angry."

Malik relaxes a bit. He peeks over Ryou's shoulder at the landscape.

"Sure brings back old times, doesn't it?" Malik nudges Ryou, smiling as much as Malik can.

But there is something hidden within Malik's eyes, a deep hurt. A pain.

Ryou doesn't really care. He can't save this girl. He can't save Malik. He can't save himself.

(He couldn't even save Amane, all those years ago, when there had been a chance…)

The remnants of Domino fade away as the train picks up speed.

"Yeah," Ryou agrees, without a trace of humor, "Old times."

-4-

"I told you, I don't know anything about a little girl," says the woman, refusing to meet their eyes.

"You're lying," Malik says coldly. He stuffs his hand in his pocket.

Ryou eyes narrow. Of course she was lying, but why on Earth would Malik ever reach for his gun?

The...escort's eyes widen. She gets it.

"Okay, okay, look. I heard that MJ and his girls were gone all yesterday, and now that they're back they're refusing any clients. I mean, I don't know anything – got that, I don't know a damn thing – but Celia told me that they're hiding something. Their place is over there on the corner of fifth and central."

Malik takes off running.

"Hey wait! You can't tell anyone that I told you!" she cries.

Ryou starts to run too.

"Promise!" she calls out, and Ryou sees fear burning deep in her eyes.

He stops.

"Promise," he tells her, then runs off to follow Malik.

By the time Ryou catches up with Malik, it's too late. He smells it already.

The death.

"No," Ryou whispers.

Malik, slowly, (horrified) opens the lid to a dumpster.

The unbearable stench punches them both, causing them to fall back.

Malik, eyes hardening, reaches in and pulls the girl out.

(Ryou begins to tremble.)

She's disgusting. The few fragments of clothes left on her are torn, bloody and stained. Her long blonde hair has tangled bits of dirt and trash matted in. Her eyes are still open.

(Bright, emerald green.)

Ryou vomits.

-5-

The walk back to the train station is a grim one. It always is. Malik has the girl nestled in his arms. She smells of sweat and death.

The lost souls stare up at them, whisper, scowl, cry for help. Ryou glares at them. He hates them all. He might even hate them more than he hates himself.

They round a corner, and funnel deep into an alley. Ryou, with ease (ease that comes from years of practice) glances to the side.

In the shadows, he sees him. Confident. Smirking. Watching him with hungry eyes.

Before, he would have been invisible, cloaked in his shadows. But now...

(..._now_...)

He doesn't even try to hide anymore.

Ryou doesn't look at him though; he (still) doesn't want Malik to see.

"You alright?" Malik asks (though Malik himself is shaken to the core.)

The figure smirks.

"I'm fine."

-6-

"There was nothing we could do," Ryou assures Malik as he places the girl's dead body on the train. A special compartment is used just for these occasions.

"I know," Malik snaps.

-7-

"Ryou," Malik says, his voice a mixture between coo and whisper.

Ryou freezes.

"Don't say it," Ryou pleads (he's had to see day after day…)

"Damn it, Ryou! We can't just ignore this! She looks just like Amane and you _know_ _it_."

"So?" Ryou hisses.

"So!" Malik yells, "I'm sick of having to walk on eggshells around you. I can't even say her name without you completely shutting down! Do you think that's how she would have wanted to be remembered?"

"You don't know anything," Ryou seethes, sinking into his seat.

Malik's posture stiffens.

"I don't?" he snorts, hiding his hurt.

(Shame washes over Ryou.)

"She was just as much my sister as she was yours."

-8-

His apartment is speeding towards him. Ryou knows who will be waiting for him.

The train comes to a screeching stop.

Ryou turns towards Malik, who is fuming.

"Please don't leave me," he whispers.

"What?" snaps Malik.

Ryou's eyes widen. He's been trying to say that for so long; he didn't even believe it was possible to admit.

"I - I," Ryou fumbles, not knowing what to do, how to break the pattern, "I don't want to go home, by myself. Come…come with me."

Ryou looks up, hoping for salvation.

Malik punches him in the face.

"Stop it, just stop it!" Malik shouts, and Ryou, from the ground, can see him shaking.

(Have I done this to him?)

"I'm not lying," Ryou says pathetically, not knowing what to do.

"I know you're not lying! That's the worst part! Every second of every day you're an entirely different person."

Ryou has never heard Malik so angry. No sarcasm, no bitterness, just rage.

"I'm sorry," Ryou says, "I just need you. Malik I…"

"Don't you say it, don't you dare _say_ it! God, Ryou – you're so stupid! I love you, okay? I've _always_ loved you!" he screams, eyes blazing, "But I can't take this anymore. The more I look at you, the more it makes me sick and angry – and I don't know why! It's driving me insane. You! You are driving me insane."

Ryou's crying again. For the first time in five years.

Malik looks at him with disgust.

"Consider this my resignation."

The train doors slam shut, leaving Ryou alone with his personal demon.

-9-

The train zips away with Malik, leaving Ryou all alone.

At least for a moment.

"Hello, Ryou."

A small chuckle fills the air. It's low and threatening and deeply amused. The hairs on the back of Ryou's neck stand straight up.

(And he begins to tremble.)

"Are you going to come quietly today?" asks Bakura, sauntering out from the shadows.

He's wearing a smirk, but the insanity burns brightly in his eyes.

("Your eyes will look just like mine soon enough. You haven't forgotten that, have you?")

"No."

It is spoken softly, barely above a whisper, but the certainty is clear.

Bakura looks at him disbelievingly. After the million yesterdays of the bruises (which still shine brightly on his skin) and the one thousand todays of passiveness, Ryou finally decides to resist.

"No," He repeats, and turns around to the face the demon. His demon.

Bakura closes his eyes, crosses his arms and laughs.

When he opens them, there is nothing behind them but rage.

"I see you have learned _nothing_."

Ryou glares, and delivers the first blow.

-10-

"It hurts, doesn't?" Bakura asks.

"What?" Ryou says, trembling. (In the pit of his stomach, something is wrong.)

"Seeing Malik everyday – the same day, over and over – and he doesn't even notice. It must be enough to drive a person crazy…"

The gravity of those words sets in. Ryou rips himself from Bakura's arms.

"You know…?!" Ryou gasps, torn between pure joy and utter horror.

Bakura's eyes are cold.

"I know."

Ryou starts laughing. It's loud and jovial, and…

He touches his cheek. Tears. Wet and sloppy, running down his face.

"We can break it then, right?" Ryou says, wiping away the tears that keep coming, "We can stop this! We can change it!"

Bakura shakes his head.

"You're too young. Too naïve. There is no breaking this," Bakura says, eyes aflame, "I made sure of it."

Ryou's heart stops beating.

"What?"

(His voice cracks to an unbearable degree.)

Bakura rises from his chair.

"I did this. I stopped tomorrow from ever happening."

The color drains from Ryou's face. He trembles.

"No…that's not…_possible_."

Bakura laughs.

"Oh, it's very _possible_," he sneers, "It's endless."

The tears slide down Ryou's face. He can't even feel them anymore. He can't feel _anything_.

"But…why?" Ryou moans, "Why are you doing something this awful to me?"

Bakura laughs again. But it's different. Before, his laugh was terrifying, but controlled. But this, this was just…unhinged.

"To you? TO YOU! I did this _for_ _you_! Can you not understand – can you not _remember_? I had to watch you _die_! Over and over and over again. You stupid, pathetic little boy, don't you get it? Since all others refuse us mercy…this…this was the only way I could _save_ you…"

Bakura reaches out for him.

(But Ryou's already gone.)

-11-

"Did I ever tell you why Malik and I created our business?" Ryou says, voice wistful.

"Yes. Your sister," Bakura pauses, "A long time ago."

Amane. She's so far away now.

"Other than that."

Bakura looks at him, curious. Maybe even frightened.

"No."

"I wanted to help people. I wanted to stop people from ever feeling the hurt I did. It was a noble cause, don't you think?"

Ryou's voice breaks and he holds back tears.

"It was your skewed sense of nobility that got you murdered in the first place," snarls Bakura, clutching onto Ryou tighter.

"You knew, didn't you? All this time. About Malik?" Ryou's voice betrays no emotion.

"Of course. It wasn't hard to tell."

"Not that," Ryou pauses, "You knew he'd end up hating me."

Bakura's eyes narrow.

He snorts.

"Well, _you_ ended up hating _me_, didn't you?"

Ryou opens his mouth to tell him that's different, but then he realizes it's not.

It's not different _at all_.

"I don't hate you."

(Ryou's not sure who that comment is for, or if it's honest.)

"You're a bad liar," Bakura whispers.

Ryou says nothing to that, and buries his hands in his pockets.

"It was selfish, though," he says coldly, "What you did to me."

"I am an entirely selfish being," Bakura snaps back.

A pause. The always binding silence.

"I'm not," Ryou whispers.

He closes his eyes.

(Ryou prays for mercy.)

He whips the gun out of his pocket so fast that Bakura doesn't even react for a couple of seconds.

Then he chuckles.

"Are you going to kill me?" he asks, voice dark and cold, "I'll just be here when you wake up. I'll always be here. You can't _change_ that, Ryou."

"I know."

Bakura's eyebrows furrow, "Then what–"

The gun is jammed against the side of Ryou's head.

(He wasn't that stupid. He finally figured it out. This was always his loop, his misery…so his end…would save everyone…)

"Ryou, _don't_!"

He pulls the trigger.

**-12-**

**

* * *

**A/N Well, that was a dark spin on the quote, right? If you need any clarification, feel free to ask in your review! Seriously. I came up with so much backstory for this, I don't think there is a question I can't awnser. Except the ending. I prefer it ambigious.

Reviews make me '=DDDD'!


	66. Softly

A/N Steam of consciousy. Narrated from limited third person view of post-series Ryou, looking back on his memories. Until the end. Maybe.

* * *

_Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways. ~ Stephen Vincent Benet. _

* * *

It starts out softly, at first.

Thoughts, slow and drawn out, like long blows of the wind ruffling through his hair (saying, whispering, almost protective…or possessive). But they're only thoughts. Soft thoughts. Warm.

(And it's cold here…it's still cold here…being alone.)

It wouldn't hurt to listen to them. To walk left instead of right, maybe ask the kid in the third row for his pencil, even though his own pen works fine. Little things. (Though this was the point, later on he realizes, the Voice has…had?...has always been unnaturally patient.)

And slowly (softly) without noticing it (does a leaf notice how far the wind pushes it? Does it care?) Ryou sacrifices control. His life.

The thoughts aren't soft anymore. Their cold and cruel and _demands_. (A thousand of them, constant, chipping away at him until all that's left of him is...what he is now…all coming…) From a voice that is dark and mysterious; not at all his own (at least…he hopes now, still, he hopes that Kul Elna was never his…). Such things aren't a concern though, not to that voice. A voice. The Voice.

And that's what Ryou calls him for the rest of…for the rest of whatever it was (is, is really…because at night he can still hear the wind only now it _howls_…)

Regardless. Present is now. And he is here. The Voice too.

(The Voice is gone.)

Regardless. Pointless. Hopeless. Worthless. (These too come softly, in dreams, in the truth the Voice speaks, in the lies he tells as well, in the reflection Ryou can't escape.)

Ryou listens (intently, secretively, fearfully).

He does as he's told.

* * *

A/N Okay. I promise next chapter will not have so much ambiguity!

Review? Please?


	67. To Love

Dedicated to **Bakura's Guardian Angel**.

* * *

_The hate he felt still tasted like love, but that didn't tame it. ~Inkdeath, Cornelia Funke_

_

* * *

_

_I could stand here all day if I wanted_, he thought as he laid down his forget-me-nots.

_There's no one here to stop me…_

-0-

She died quickly, with a smile still plastered on her face.

"Don't worry big brother, I'll get it!" she laughed, and ran after the ball that had bounced into the street. A crown of pale purple forget-me-nots still sat on her head.

She didn't have time to scream. Neither did he. (Ryou still doesn't quite believe that, he should have done something, anything, but instead he just…watched…)

A car swivelled and spiralled and crashed into her.

It was another four hours before Ryou realized it was his mother's car.

-0-

Dear Amane,

Hi. I miss you a lot. Father doesn't talk much now that you're gone. He doesn't smile either.

We moved! Which is good, I guess, because the house was so big and lonely without you two…but it's hard making new friends. We didn't move too far though, our old house is only about a four hour drive away. At least, that's what father says…

Other than that, nothing has changed, really. I mean, a lot has changed, everything feels different, but… I don't know how to explain it to you…

What else do you want to know? I mean, I'm not sure what to tell you…

Oh! I'm writing you this letter because when we learned about letters Mrs. Thompson said that you write a letter to someone you love who is far away.

And I love you so…

Sincerely,

Ryou

-0-

He received the ring five years to the day of her death. From his father. Almost like a consolation gift.

(_Sorry, son, but you're not important enough for me to actually visit on the anniversary of your mother and sister's deaths, but here have this gift, I'm sure that will make up for it!_)

Ryou, with bile in the back of his throat, ripped the letter to shreds. Just as he was about to throw that gift into the trash where it belonged, he stopped.

It sang to him; a siren's song. Ryou forgot all his hate (how _ironic_) and ran a finger down the cold gold. Egyptian obviously, and it appeared to be some sort of…ring…

He felt slightly woozy, and darkness crept into the corners of his vision.

Immediately, he scavenged the house for some rope. Ryou wanted (needed) to wear it.

-0-

He met Yuugi Mouto one year later. If somehow the ring was not the worst thing that had ever happened to him, then Yuugi was. Up until then, Ryou had lived without love or friendship or kindness for so long that it no longer bothered him. But Yuugi brought light, however dim and far way, into his life.

And it burned.

(Still does, remotely, when he dwells on it.)

He hadn't expected to meet anyone life-changing that day. Ryou arrived at school promptly, and the only reason he'd been halfway running down the hall was because of Ushio and his gang of thugs. Funny, how they can smell the weak ones even on the first day…

If he had been more careful, Yuugi Mouto would never have met him.

But he wasn't. Carelessness was always his downfall.

As Ryou turned a corner, he tripped and landed right on top of a short, multi-colored-haired boy. Ryou quickly pulled himself off of him and gathered his books.

"I'm terribly sorry," Ryou muttered, his cheeks bright red.

Yuugi laughed, "It's okay. I was kinda zoning out myself."

Ryou looks up, because Yuugi has such a nice laugh. Like wind-chimes.

That was a mistake. That was when he first saw the Puzzle. The forsaken Millennium Puzzle, one of the seven items that haunted him not only in this life but past…

It sparkled and glittered (and _oh it was so beautiful_) and lit up his entire vision –

(Then, blackness.)

-0-

He woke up in the middle of a science lecture. All of a sudden, clarity rushed at him, all of a sudden he could see again. Ryou, for the first time in what seemed like a long time, saw light.

How ridiculous that all sounded. He was just having a daydream is all…

And that boy he ran into (_Yuugi_, said a small voice in the back of his mind).

Yuugi. Ryou didn't remember Yuugi introducing himself…

He shook his head. Wow, he must really be out of it today...come to mention it, his head was throbbing and it felt like something was digging into his chest…

Instinctively, Ryou touched his chest.

The ring's tassels were buried into his skin.

(It will scar.)

-0-

"So you can finally hear me."

The cup Ryou was holding fell to the floor, shattering into a million pieces. He whipped around wildly and searched for the source of the voice. The last time anyone had been anywhere near his kitchen was…was when Akito fell into a coma…

A laugh.

(It was clear to Ryou that the laugh belonged to the same person who had spoken. The voice was so cold.)

"Perhaps I don't give you enough credit, landlord. I can't believe someone as weak as you could remember that."

"Who's there?!" Ryou shouted out, desperate to sound intimating, but only succeeding at sounding fearful.

He gasped. A deep chill radiated from his bones. It felt as if someone had ripped the air out of his lungs.

Slowly, like a mirage on the Sahara, an airy and wispy figure formed. It was himself, but not himself. The hair was wilder, spikier. The form stood taller and straighter. And the _eyes_, the eyes were all wrong. (So harsh and never-ending.)

Ryou froze (he felt that dizzy, woozy blackness coming on again) before taking a step back.

"W-who are you?" he stuttered out, amazed at his own ability to even speak.

The figure smirked, "I am a thief and stealer of souls…"

"What?" Ryou furrowed his brows, and tried to regain his calm. The figure was partially translucent, so he must be a ghost, maybe…a spirit?

"Simply, host?" The spirit took a step closer, "I am you."

All words Ryou had were lost.

The spirit continued, "I am your darkness, your hatred, your hidden desire. I grant your wishes."

Again, that hideous smirk returned.

"You should be thanking me."

Ryou was so amazed by the wishes part that he didn't notice the hidden threat.

"What do you want?" Ryou asked, the fear replaced by curiosity, hope.

Quick as a flash, the spirit grabbed Ryou's wrist and pulled him closer. The grip itself was the strongest thing Ryou had ever felt (he was certain it would bruise) and it didn't even seem like the spirit was trying to hurt him. He was just that strong – powerful.

Ryou looked up, afraid again.

The spirit's eyes burned like coals.

"Your obedience. Your loyalty."

Ryou blinked, "That's it?"

(He'll regret those words.)

The spirit let go of his wrist. Ryou stumbled a bit.

"Listen to me, and nothing shall ever harm you," the spirit said with dull eyes. He took a step back.

"Wait!" Ryou called, stepping forward, "Don't go!"

But the spirit had already vanished. Nothing in the room but Ryou and his million broken pieces.

He touched his wrist. Nothing.

Ryou will stare at that un-bruised wrist for weeks.

-0-

Dear Amane,

I'm going insane. I'm sure of it. Yesterday, I had a conversation with myself…but not myself…I mean, he (it?) said he was me…but…

Well, I think the above paragraph just proves my point.

If that was all, I could just write it off as lack of sleep but...it isn't.

Amane, I can't remember things anymore. Not anything big! Just small, little details. Like what time I got home last night or what I had for dinner. It's blurry and dark when I try to remember…

It must seem like I'm making a big deal out of it, but it's not just the feeling of absentmindedness, it feels like something is being stolen from me.

I don't know what to do.

And the night before that, as I walked home, all the streetlamps blew out. One by one.

I'm frightened, Amane. Something horrible is happening, I just know it.

I need you here. So badly.

Yours always and forever,

Ryou

-0-

Ryou grew accustomed to it, eventually, so the spirit grew more and more careless.

But at least the blood on his hands was always easy to wash off, even if it never came off his clothes.

-0-

"You cling to her because she's the only one who ever loved you."

Ryou cringed. The spirit always had to point out the obvious.

He turned, and there was the spirit, leaning against the door of Ryou's soul.

"You're desperate," he said.

Ryou rubbed a purple petal in his hand.

"She loved me," Ryou said, "And I loved her. There is nothing wrong with missing that."

The spirit chuckled, "What you fail to realize, landlord, is that if she could actually read those pathetic letters you write, or even see you for a split second, she'd hate you. Look around you –"

Ryou did. His soul room was decaying, but he'd grown used to that too.

"Do you really think she'd love what you've become?"

Ryou began to tremble, but then he closed his eyes. Calmed himself.

When he opened them, his eyes burned like coals.

"I'm not you," he snapped, "I will not let my love turn to hate."

(He'll pay for that later, but the look on the spirit's face was worth it.)

-0-

Dear Amane,

All things considered, the spirit is very clever. And patient. To wait so long for revenge, and to plot each step so slowly and carefully, it is quite astounding. He could win. He won't, of course, because he's a part of me, but he could. I wonder if that will make it worse for him, in the end…

I found out about Kul Elna a long time ago. I didn't tell you because…because I didn't. There's no reason. I just couldn't put the pen to the paper.

It's funny though. It humanizes him a bit. What he's working for, it could have been considered noble if it had come from anyone other than him.

Not that I agree with it, any of it. Any of him.

I don't.

Always with love,

Ryou

-0-

The first time he saw Malik was the first time he realized that he was no longer just a host, but an accomplice.

Malik had the Millennium Rod clenched tightly in his hand, and eyes like the petals of flowers…

"So _you're_ his host. Hmph. I was expecting something better."

-0-

"Yuugi-kun!" Ryou gasped, shocked at the sight of the puzzle-bearer on his front door step.

Yuugi smiled, brightly but unsurely.

"What are you doing here?"

That came out as more of a hiss than his polite persona would ever have been capable of.

"I thought that maybe you'd like to hang out or something," Yuugi offered, that stupid smile still there.

"Sorry, Yuugi," Ryou recited, "You know I don't like the arcade."

"I'm not going to the arcade!" Yuugi insisted.

Ryou blinked, "Oh? Then what are you and Jou and Anzu –"

Yuugi cut him off, "They're not coming. I thought you'd like to do something, just you and me."

Ryou's heart skipped a beat.

(_Yes, Yuugi, I would have liked that so much…_)

"I can't. Homework," he explained half-heartedly.

"Oh."

(That smile was finally gone.)

"I'm going to get back to work now," Ryou said as he grabbed the doorknob.

"Wait!" Yuugi shouted, almost frantic.

Ryou stopped.

"Um…" Yuugi looked to the ground; he'd lost all his courage. "You know that I'll always be here for you, right?"

Ryou's eyes widened.

"Yuugi…"

(The spirit had to force him to close the door after that.)

-0-

"I hate you," Ryou hissed.

"No you don't," the spirit replied, unfazed.

Silence. Ryou crushed the forget-me-not in his hand.

He laughed.

"You're right," Ryou said, "I can't feel _anything_ anymore."

His voice lowered.

"That's what you wanted this whole time, wasn't it?"

-0-

Dear Amane,

The spirit has been working with Malik more and more frequently, which means I have to too. He's obnoxious and arrogant, and always asks questions that have answers that don't concern him one bit. The spirit calls him 'brat' and it's quite appropriate. Given the chance, I'm sure they'd kill one another. But Malik has the Millennium Rod. So we have to deal with him.

I don't like him at all.

…

He reminds me of you.

Always,

Ryou

-0-

"I don't want to talk to _you_," Malik sneered, "I want to talk to _him_ – that cheating, lying bast-"

Ryou pushed Malik's hands off of his shirt.

"He doesn't really care what you want."

Malik let out a long string of Arabic, presumably curses.

Ryou sighed.

"Are you done yet?"

"No! You tell him that–"

"What makes you think he'll listen to me?"

Malik blinked, genuinely perplexed.

"Aren't you two like partners or something?" he asked.

Ryou bit back the urge to laugh. (Or cry, because they were being grouped together…)

"No. Not even close."

Malik rolled his eyes, "You're so melodramatic. You should be thankful he treats you a lot better than my–"

Something flashed through Malik's eyes. Weakness.

-0-

"You told him!" Ryou shouted, his voice raw.

"I did."

Ryou shook with rage, with fury, with shock.

"Why?" he screamed, "Why would you do that–"

"You learned his weakness, he thought it was only fair that he learned yours," the spirit said simply.

He didn't care. He didn't care _at all_.

"How _could_ you?" Ryou yelled, voice breaking, "How could you choose him over me?"

The last part slipped out, and once it echoed from the walls of his soul room, Ryou refused to say another word.

-0-

"So," Malik said, oddly without a trace of sarcasm.

(Ryou can't look at him without wanting to throw up.)

"You have a sister."

"Had," Ryou corrected.

"Me too."

Silence. Awkward and heavy.

"Your secret or whatever," Ryou snapped finally, "I didn't even hear it, or understand it. So we're not even."

Malik glared. "My sister is still alive. I miss her."

Ryou's expression lightened.

"So there. Now we're even."

-0-

"I just wanted to know more about you," Malik said one day, "That's why I asked."

"Why would you ever want to know anything about me?" Ryou said, incredulously.

"I've never had a friend before."

-0-

Dear Amane,

I found our old picture album under something in my apartment today.

You were so young. Sometimes I forget that.

Ryou

-0-

The spirit snorted.

"Love, such a pathetic emotion. I would have expected more from you, landlord."

"How?" Ryou asked, numbly, coldly, "How is it pathetic?"

The spirit was caught off guard by this and glared.

"Look how much pain your _love_," he sneered and motioned across Ryou's soul room, "has caused you. Look at all the weakness."

Ryou didn't see pain or weakness in the walls of his soul.

(He only saw wilting forget-me-nots.)

"You're wrong," Ryou said flatly.

"Oh?"

"Hate hurts worse. Hate did this to me."

The spirit chuckled, "You naïve little boy, hate has given you strength."

Ryou shook his head.

"No. When I look at you, when I hear you, when I think of you…the pain in me is a hundred times worse than it is when I look at Amane."

A pause.

"And I don't love you," Ryou said, "So you're wrong."

-0-

Malik didn't even try to talk to him, after he got salvation.

Ryou expected as much.

-0-

When the spirit lost, Ryou didn't feel anything.

No pain, no relief, nothing.

(There was only emptiness.)

-0-

"Hey," Malik called, rude as ever, "Ryou!"

Ryou turned around, lost and dizzy.

"If you don't call me as soon as you get home, I swear…" he threatened.

-0-

He was more broken then he ever could have realized.

When you are trapped in darkness, (surrounded by it, cloaked in it) your wounds are hidden from you. You don't see the damage done; you don't feel anything but hate and anger.

But the darkness was gone, and Ryou was nothing more than a million shattered pieces – a meadow of dead flowers.

He didn't even know if he could heal, much less where to start.

As he always did when he was lost, he picked up his pen to write to Amane.

It burned. It burned and bled, tore, ripped, blazed. Pain so sharp and finally detectable.

It soon became clear. An image of a girl with flowers in her hair.

Amane.

He loved her so much, so much, so then why did it hurt so badly?

Because (the epiphany was freezing), he hated her.

Or at least, he didn't love her. Love brought happiness, she (now, when he thought of her) brought only darkness and pain.

No. He couldn't love her like this anymore. He had to let her go.

Let it all go.

-0-

Dear Amane,

I love you. Always.

Goodbye.

With all my soul,

Ryou

-0-

Ryou placed his last letter to Amane on her tombstone.

He could, if he wanted to, stay here with her forever.

But he won't.

* * *

A/N As always, reviews are much appreciated!


	68. Savior

A/N Takes place sometime during episode 220.

* * *

_A friend accepts us as we are yet helps us to be what we should. ~ Author Unknown_

* * *

The soft swaying of the waves soothes his cluttered mind. But only just.

Ryou can't control himself. His hands linger on where the ring should be. (Shouldn't really, he didn't want it there…right?…_right_.)

He feels nothing with the spirit's departure. No joy or pain or loneliness. Maybe a dull ache.

"Bakura!" a voice calls out to him.

Ryou turns around in a flash, "Yuugi - !"

It's not Yuugi.

This man stands up straighter, taller, with his nose up in the air. His eyes are all wrong too, not the bright wideness of the real Yuugi's.

Ryou's face automatically falters but he quickly forces it back to an indifferent stare.

"Pharaoh."

(It's more of an assertion than greeting.)

The Pharaoh smiles softly, with a trace of a smirk.

"Call me Atemu. My name's Atemu," he says.

Ryou takes a step back. He's never seen that look in the Pharaoh's eyes before. Certain, but compassionate; strong and unyielding.

"Do you mind if I join you?"

Blood memory, soul memory, (darkness staining the back of his mind), all scream at Ryou to not allow this sort of contact.

_Ryou _is screaming at Ryou not to allow this contact.

He turns back to face the river. "Of course not."

This is silence, but it doesn't last long enough.

"He's gone, for good," the Pharaoh assures.

The shadows don't cling to him wherever he walks. The thick smog of darkness that always suffocated him is gone.

"I know."

The Pharaoh still does not leave. He looks at Ryou with questioning eyes.

(Did he - did he want a thank you?)

Ryou looks away, "Thank you."

(He's not sure if he means it. But he knows he should.)

The Pharaoh scowls.

"Don't _thank _me, it was nothing. I should have rescued you a long time ago."

"You could never rescue me."

The words come out so fast, so automatic, (so cold), that both Ryou and the Pharaoh gasp silently.

"It's j-just," Ryou fumbles over his words, trying desperately to hide his truth.

He sighs, and his small frame shakes.

"I _am _grateful."

Ryou looks to the Pharaoh, ashamed. There is no hatred or fear in his eyes. Just certainty.

"I don't know what _he _did to you," the Pharaoh says, looking deep into Ryou's eyes, "but I want you to know you have friends here. And they'd save you if you'd give them the chance."

Ryou doesn't have any words.

(It's a warm feeling.)

"Goodbye Bakura," the Pharaoh says, with finality.

Ryou smiles.

"Good luck, Atemu."

* * *

A/N Because ASL is seriously lacking on any sort of Atemu/Ryou interection. LOL I CALL THIS A DRABBLE -fails- Please review!


	69. Burned

A/N Major enormous thanks to Fiver who beta'd this chapter amazingly fast. Dedicated to **The One Called Dementra**. Five years post canon.

* * *

_The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let in come in. ~ Morrie Schwartz_

* * *

The world burned.

With fire, with hatred, it burned.

The whole world (his whole world, the only world he'd ever known - made out of dirt and clay…) and those in it.

He watched. The fire consumed.

Ryou woke up crying, for the first time in five years.

-0-

Needless to say, his nightmare made his mood plummet. Though only a vague imprint was left on him (fire…and screaming), the result he still remembered. Tears. Weakness.

Ryou scowled, and slammed the door hard behind him. He had a long day of work ahead of him, and he refused to let something as insignificant as one his nightmares distract him.

-0-

"The new pieces from America have just arrived. Cataloging has them at the moment, but I'm sure they'll be ready for display by tomorrow," said Hana, shoving more paperwork into Ryou's hands.

They turned the corner, heading for Ryou's office.

"And what about the sculptures from Tokyo?" he asked, skimming through the papers.

Hana shrugged, "I haven't heard anything about them. I'm assuming that the shipping was delayed."

Ryou sighed and dug his keys out of his pocket.

"Anything else you need to tell me?" he asked.

She blinked and then her whole face lit up.

"Oh! There's someone here to see you. Says he's a friend of yours."

Ryou's eyebrows furrowed. Friend? He didn't have any friends…

He pushed his office door open (it was already unlocked). And there, in the middle of his office, was a boy with multi-colored hair and bags under his eyes.

"Bakura-kun."

Ryou gasped slightly, but then regained his composure.

"Hana," he said, "Could you give us some time alone? Please?"

She nodded and walked away. Ryou locked the door behind him.

The boy with violet eyes smiled painfully.

(That made Ryou's glare even steelier.)

"Yuugi," he said, "What are you doi-?"

A shadow emerged from behind him.

"Bakura," said a voice, regal and strong.

Ryou took a step back, every hair on his body standing straight up.

"Pharaoh."

Yuugi rubbed his arm awkwardly.

"I know that you…I remember what you said and stuff…it's just that…well, we kind of need to talk to you."

(Ryou had to grab hold of his desk just to keep from fainting.)

-0-

He told Hana he was taking the rest of the day off. Because, apparently, the dead were walking the earth. Ryou was entitled to a day off.

Yuugi, the Pharaoh and Ryou took the booth furthest away from the door in the diner.

Ryou, as calmly as he could fake, asked, "Have you called the Ishtars?"

Yuugi nodded.

"Ishizu booked a flight – she said they'd get here around midnight. Her and Malik."

(Both Ryou and the Pharaoh blanched at 'Malik'.)

Ryou shook his head.

"I don't understand..." he trailed off, "How?"

Yuugi (as always) looked towards the Pharaoh.

The Pharaoh looked down.

"I don't know," he paused and took a breath, "I can't remember anything. All I remember is the duel and then…then waking up in the middle of a park. Like no time had passed."

Ryou exhaled deeply.

(He had to clench his hands in order to keep them from shaking.)

"It was just you, right? Just you?"

Understanding flashed through the Pharaoh's eyes. (Yuugi's too, though it was more subtle. He'd known all along.)

"I'm not sure."

"That's not an answer!" Ryou yelled.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi whimpered and reached out for him.

"You would know! There's no way you wouldn't know! You would be able to feel in your bones, your soul, every inch of you would burn-"

Ryou stopped himself. (His soul sizzled.)

"He's back."

(Ryou's voice was emotionless. There was no emotion left to give.)

The Pharaoh's eyes hardened.

"If he is, then that's the reason I'm back. I've defeated him before and I'll do it again! I won't let him hurt anyone, especially you, Bakura-"

"I don't need your protection," Ryou snapped.

(Yuugi cringed.)

"Order forty-two! Number forty-two!" called the cashier.

"That's us," Yuugi said weakly.

No one said a thing.

"I'll get it," Yuugi said and squirmed past the Pharaoh.

When he was finally out of earshot, the Pharaoh looked straight through Ryou.

"You've changed," he accused.

Ryou looked away. (Glared.)

"I didn't have a choice." (You left.) "It's been five years, Atemu. What did you expect? That everything would stay the same? Everything would be perfect?"

The Pharaoh recoiled, hurt.

"Or that maybe…you coming back would just fix everything? Like it always has?"

A bitter flavor stung Ryou's mouth. (The words he spat tasted like poison.) His shoulders slumped, and he chuckled darkly, sadly.

"You've noticed, haven't you? Yuugi's changed too."

The Pharaoh's mouth widened, and then his eyes narrowed. Ryou met his harsh gaze.

"And you can't fix him, either."

-0-

Ryou walked back to his apartment from the diner. He had refused the ride Yuugi had offered him.

(He was also being watched.)

-0-

The moment he locked and bolted the door behind him, Ryou collapsed.

And for the second time that day, he cried.

-0-

No amount of curses, in any of the languages Malik knew, would be enough to summarize (much less define) the pure hatred he felt for the place they were going.

That city. Domino.

"You should have brought Rishid," Malik grumbled.

Ishizu sighed.

"We've been through this, Malik," she said, "Someone had to stay behind to take care of our home."

"I could have stayed."

Ishizu gave him the look. The big sister, 'Oh, really, Malik?' look.

Malik slouched further into his seat.

"Well, you could have come by yourself," he sneered.

Ishizu frowned, blue eyes betraying some of her hurt.

This time, Malik sighed.

"It's just not fair! I thought that our job was over! I thought we could finally move on!"

Ishizu pulled him close.

"I know," she whispered, "I thought so too."

-0-

Ryou didn't know why he agreed to meet the Ishtars at Yuugi's game shop. (Or why he was accepting Yuugi's calls again…)

Maybe some part of him hoped that they'd be able to explain everything (like they always did) and that they could tell him that he wasn't back…

That cold, irrational fear swept over him again and Ryou went into the shop without knocking.

-0-

He looked different. Older, meaner. Not that Malik had ever really known Bakura that well, or at least not this Bakura, but he could just tell he'd changed.

"So you don't know anything?" Yuugi asked, the desperation evident in his voice, "No reason at all?"

Ishizu shook her head.

"Nothing foretold of this event. Of course, we'll look through everything again but…" she trailed off.

"But there's really nothing you can do," the Pharaoh finished for her, "Thank you anyway, Ishizu, for coming on such short notice."

Malik snorted. Short notice. They'd dropped everything in their entire lives to fly across the globe to a city filled to the brim with bad memories. One little 'thank you' hardly made up for it.

"I suppose," the not-Bakura said. What was his name again? Ryou? "You're saying we should just live with it? That it's permanent?"

Yuugi's eyes lit up.

Ishizu nodded.

"I don't see anything that could reverse the effects."

"Great!" Malik exclaimed, "So that means everything's fine and we can go home?"

"Not everything," the Pharaoh said gravely. Always a buzz-kill.

"Bakura's back."

Ishizu gasped.

"You've seen him?" she asked. The Pharaoh shook his head.

"I've felt him," Ryou interjected, "I know he's here."

Malik eyed the boy up and down. So he hadn't changed that much after all.

"But you haven't seen him? Like actually seen him?" Malik asked.

Ryou glared.

"No."

"And I'm assuming that if you haven't seen him, then he hasn't done anything to you? So what's the problem?" Malik said bluntly.

"Existing. The fact that he exists is the problem," Ryou snarled. Hate burned deep in his eyes.

Malik's gut wrenched. That hate seemed so familiar. They stared at each other for a long moment, before Ishizu broke the silence.

"Pharaoh, I think it would be best if we stayed here with you, for a while. To see how things unfold."

The Pharaoh nodded, and Yuugi smiled slightly.

Malik never took his eyes off Ryou.

-0-

Ryou exited the shop as quickly as it became apparent to him that the Ishtars knew no more than they did.

"Hey!" said an arrogant, harsh voice. Malik.

(Ryou cringed. Nothing brought back bad memories like Malik.)

"What?" Ryou asked, turning around.

"You should get a drink with me."

Ryou withdrew. "What?"

Malik stepped in front of Ryou.

"I saw a place up the street."

-0-

"So, Ryou-"

"Call me Bakura."

"No."

"…Why not?"

"His name's Bakura."

"No, it isn't. He didn't…doesn't…didn't have a name. Bakura's always been my name."

"Well, you two are like the same person, so it doesn't really matter."

"We are not the same person!"

"Heh. Yeah, sure. Look, I'm not here to further complicate your obvious identity issues, Ryou. I call you Ryou because that way I can tell the difference between you two and I like calling you that. So there."

…

"Fine, Malik-kun."

-0-

The thief sat on the rooftop, watching. His host had changed, or at least, pretended to have.

After all, how much could he have really changed if he still always looked over his shoulder?

-0-

"Take this!" Ryou said, shoving a golden necklace into Malik's hands, "You like gold, right?"

Malik held it up to the light, "Ra! It's real! Where did you get it?"

Ryou looked away, eye twitching a bit.

"He left this for you, didn't he?" Malik laughed.

"It's not funny," Ryou sneered.

"No. It's hilarious."

Ryou sighed, "Just take it, okay? I don't want it anywhere near me."

-0-

Hana informed him, for the second time in two weeks, that he had a visitor.

Yuugi.

"What are you doing here?" Ryou asked, more exasperated than ever.

"I came here to see you," he said.

"Why?" Ryou hissed. (Hadn't they already been through this? Hadn't Ryou said enough to hurt Yuugi before?)

"You're my friend, Bakura. I don't care if you don't feel the same. I'm worried about you. We're all worried about you. And I know you. You bury yourself in your work and pretend that everything is normal, but Bakura…you can't hide from this forever. You have to talk to him."

Ryou crossed his arms. The day he willingly accepted that darkness back into his life was the day he…

"Get out of my office."

-0-

Malik took a sip of whatever alcoholic drink he'd chosen that night. Ryou took a sip of his tea.

"I heard Anzu flew in from New York. And Jounouchi and Honda drove in from out of town. It's like a family reunion," Malik said bitterly, "Why aren't you there?"

"Why would I be?" Ryou snapped.

"Weren't you friends?"

"Maybe. I don't know," Ryou paused, "Probably."

Malik arched a brow, "Well, then what happened?"

"I said some things."

"We all say stuff, Ryou," Malik snorted.

"But I meant it."

-0-

"You," Malik said, icily.

It was Bakura, even if his looks had changed. Tan skin and a cool-looking scar below his eye couldn't change that smirk and cocky attitude.

Malik put a hand on his hip.

"So you really are back. And here I thought you were just a myth."

Bakura sneered.

"Of course I'm here. The Pharaoh and I are bound by fate."

Malik blinked. That was weird. It kinda sounded like he was quoting somebody.

"And you've decided to use your new body to stalk Ryou from alleyways."

"I'm not stalking him," snarled Bakura, "I'm watching him. He's mine. I can watch him if I want."

Malik snorted. So denial was something the light and dark halves both had in common.

Bakura glared at him and shoved his hands into the pocket of his red sweater.

"Besides," he said, "You can't talk, Malik. What are you doing here, anyway?"

Malik flustered and then glared back.

"I was just going to wait here until Ryou got out of work. Then see if he wanted to do something."

"Heh. Landlord doesn't even like you that much. He just tolerates you because he's desperate."

"Well, at least I actually talk to him!" Malik said, suddenly enraged, "You just creep around in the shadows. He's afraid of you!"

Bakura's grey eyes flashed dangerously.

"At least he doesn't pity me the way he pities you. He sees the way everyone else looks at you and feels sorry for you because everyone hates you. You don't even know him either. You're just desperate. Because you know that they don't trust you, you hear them whispering about you at-"

"Shut up!" Malik shouted and ran head-on into Bakura's chest, pushing him to the ground.

Bakura, momentarily stunned, did not resist when Malik punched him in the stomach.

But when Malik raised his fist to do it again, Bakura grabbed him by the collar and threw him into the brick wall.

"You little brat," he sneered, wiping the blood from his mouth.

Malik, dizzy but still conscious, stood up.

"You can say whatever you want about me. It doesn't change the fact that Ryou still hates you."

Bakura growled and charged at him, pushing him back into the wall. He wrapped his fingers around Malik's throat and lifted him off the ground.

"You always annoyed me."

Malik, tearing at Bakura's fingers, kicked him in the face. Bakura dropped him and stumbled backwards. Malik gasped for breath. They met each other's glare and both ran at each other.

Bakura punched Malik in the face.

He stood up, fell back down, and then everything went black.

-0-

"Malik! What happened to your face?" Ryou cried out.

The boy in question glared.

"It's a long story."

-0-

There was another present on his door-step.

Ryou ignored it, but it made him feel light-headed all the same.

(Could he really keep living like this? Ignoring everything?)

-0-

"You're here again?" Malik said, disbelievingly.

Bakura, arms crossed, eyed him coldly.

"Do you have a death wish or something?"

"I'm not here to fight you," Malik said, "It was just a question."

Bakura looked Malik up and down, and then returned his gaze to the Domino Museum.

"It's not like I have anything better to do."

Malik leaned up against the wall.

"Me neither."

-0-

"I talked to Yuugi yesterday," said Malik.

"Oh?" Ryou asked, taking a sip of his tea.

"Yeah. He said he's glad we're talking but…"

"But what?"

"But he misses you."

Ryou looked to the ground, ashamed. (All the things he'd done burned like embers from a fading fire.)

"Why do you hate him so much anyway, Ryou?" Malik asked, sincerely.

"I don't hate him," Ryou admitted.

"Then why are you such a prick to him?"

Ryou leaned in to himself.

"I don't deserve him, Malik. I've never deserved him."

-0-

Ryou picked up the bracelet, silver and gold and bejewelled with rubies. He tossed it over the stairs of his apartment.

"I know you're there!" he shouted to the shadows "I know you're watching me! Just leave me alone! I don't want these stupid…trinkets. I don't want anything to do with you! I don't care what Yuugi says or that you have a body. You're nothing but hate and darkness. Your scars are still here with me! Your hate and your darkness, it's still in me. It ruined me forever! I still feel it… everyday…just leave me alone."

"Please," he whispered.

(There was no response.)

Ryou rushed inside his apartment before the neighbors could see.

-0-

Ryou, taking a deep breath for courage, knocked on the door.

The Pharaoh opened it and glared.

"Bakura," he said coldly.

Ryou tried his best to stay friendly. (After all, he kind of deserved that.)

"Can I speak to Yuugi?"

"No."

Okay, so he deserved that too.

Ryou opened his mouth to plead his case, but he didn't have to.

"Atemu, who's at the door?" Yuugi asked, gently pushing the Pharaoh to the side.

"Bakura-kun."

The light disappeared from Yuugi's eyes.

"Hi," Ryou said bashfully, "Can we talk?"

Yuugi blinked.

"Yeah. Yeah! Of course!"

"Wait! Yuugi!" The Pharaoh said, but Yuugi was already out the door.

"What is it, Bakura?"

Ryou took another breath. Could he do this? Apologize, after he'd worked so hard to make Yuugi believe that he hated him…

(Did he even deserve to be able to apologize, after everything? Did someone as broken as him deserve a second chance?)

Yuugi looked at him with wide-open eyes.

(They were so forgiving. They burned right through him.)

Ryou had to turn away.

"Would it be too late to say I'm sorry?" he said, slowly, softly, "About all those things I said to you that day…is it too late for me to tell you I never meant any of them?"

(I could never hate you, Yuugi-kun.)

There was a small, peaceful, relieving silence.

Then, Yuugi wrapped his arms around him.

"Never."

-0-

"I don't get you," Malik said.

Bakura turned away, bored.

"I don't care."

Malik continued unfazed, "Why don't you just talk to him? Prove to him you've changed."

"What if I haven't changed?"

Malik cocked his brow, "You've changed."

"Even if I have, which I haven't, do you think he'd believe me? You said it yourself, he hates me."

Malik wanted to say something, but there was nothing more to say.

-0-

"Hey, Ryou!" Malik called, as Ryou exited the museum.

"Don't talk to me," Ryou growled darkly from between clenched teeth.

Malik took a step back. Ryou's eyes were on fire.

"What's your problem?" he sneered.

"My problem?" Ryou laughed, "The same thing that is always my problem - him! Do you think I'm an idiot? Is that it? Was I just some game to you two - this whole time?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I saw you!" Ryou yelled, "I saw you with him!"

Malik cringed, "Ryou, he's not what you think."

Ryou ignored him.

"You've been partners with him this whole time, haven't you? Haven't you?!" he shouted, losing more and more of his calm mask.

"Ryou, calm down. You act like he's evil incarnate. Since he's gotten here he hasn't done anything wrong," Malik said, taking a step towards Ryou.

"Shut up! He's done everything wrong. You don't know anything! You pretend to be this great analyzer and friend but deep down you can't even deal with your own issues! So don't you dare tell me who I should or shouldn't forgive! Just leave. Me. Alone."

Ryou ran away from him.

-0-

"Well. You really did a great job on that one. I don't even think I could have done as badly as you did."

"Shut up."

-0-

"So you really haven't talked him? Not once? Even though it's been almost a year?"

Ryou shook his head.

"Why would I ever talk to him, Yuugi? He's done no good to me."

Yuugi poked the diner's table with his fork.

"Meeting Atemu was the best thing that ever happened to me," Yuugi said, more to himself than anyone, "When I defeated him in the duel, it was horrible, because it meant I lost him. But at the same time, I thought it meant that I was stronger now. That I didn't need him anymore."

Yuugi paused, and Ryou was so transfixed by the story that he dared not speak a word.

"I was wrong. I survived and everything, but I still need him. I think I'll always need him. It's terrible…but true. And when he came back, I felt like a failure because I was so happy. Needing him, it made me feel worthless."

A small smile spread across Yuugi's face. (Along with tears.)

"But I don't care anymore. He's here and he's not leaving and even if it's co-dependent, he makes me happy. He makes my life happy."

Yuugi wiped away his tears.

"Sorry," he said, blushing.

"Don't be," Ryou asserted, and reached for Yuugi's hand.

The boy smiled again.

"All I'm saying Bakura-kun, is that even though he hurt you, maybe you need him too?"

-0-

"What the hell are you doing?" Bakura asked, though it sounded more like a threat. Then again, everything Bakura said sounded like a threat.

Malik ignored him and kept his focus on the white haired boy down on the street.

"Stalking Ryou. Can't you tell? I thought that was like your specialty or something."

Bakura sneered.

"I don't stalk him I just-"

"Stalk him."

"You're such a brat," Bakura growled.

"And you're a bastard. So we're perfect for each other."

Bakura glared daggers, but sat down next to Malik anyway. There was silence as they watched Ryou.

"You know," Bakura said after a time, "Landlord's soft. You could just apologize."

Malik sighed.

"I know."

-0-

Ryou walked into the Kame Game Shop, uncertain. Yuugi had sounded so anxious on the phone.

(And Yuugi, in the face of anything, was always filled with hope.)

"So the other night when we were having dinner, it just hit me!" Yuugi said, as he closed the door behind them, "Do you remember what happened during the Pharaoh's memories?"

"No," Ryou said, automatically, "Why would I remember? I wasn't even there."

Both Yuugi and the Pharaoh cringed.

"So you don't know," the Pharaoh said, "Why your other hates me so much?"

Ryou blinked, "There's a reason?"

Yuugi nodded, "You see, Bakura-kun-"

The Pharaoh touched Yuugi's forearm, stopping him.

"I want to tell him. It's my family's shame. I should tell him."

Ryou curled up slightly.

"Tell me what?"

They told him of the creation of the Millennium Items.

(And all the people it burned.)

-0-

Yuugi was right, all along. He couldn't ignore this forever.

(Hate, really. But hate and ignorance seemed to have become interchangeable by this point.)

Kul Elna. His other, the thief's village. (Was that the place that burned so brightly in his nightmares? Were they really memories?)

Ryou inhaled.

Time to find out.

He opened his balcony door and took a step outside.

"I know you're there," Ryou called out, staring into the night sky that was illuminated by decaying buildings, "Come out."

There was no response. (But only for a moment.)

Seemingly coming from the darkness itself, a figure leapt onto Ryou's balcony. He took a step closer, reeking of confidence. His tan skin shimmered like gold in the moonlight.

Ryou's heart sped up. He'd never actually seen the thief up close.

His dirty grey-white hair was cropped short, and he had a scar just like Yuugi had said he did. He wasn't wearing that blood-red cloak Yuugi had described though. The thief wore a red sweater and jeans. He looked oddly normal for a being over three thousand years old.

Ryou exhaled. (Told himself he wasn't afraid.)

"I want to talk to you."

"Oh?" the thief asked, cocking his brow, "But you've done so well at ignoring me this last year."

(He sounded surprisingly bitter and hurt.)

Ryou frowned, "Don't act like you didn't deserve it. You put my friends in comas, and when you didn't do that, you actively tried to kill them."

The thief scoffed. "They aren't your friends."

"They are."

(Ryou is certain.)

"Well, you don't even remember it, so how can you act so entitled?" the thief snarled.

Ryou cringed. It was true. All of his memories of the ring were fragmented at best. And at worst…(it was as if he was surrounded by fog at all sides)…

"You're so callous," Ryou retorted.

"You're so naïve!"

Ryou sighed. But he was strangely relieved. This person (a real, live human being) wasn't like the spirit. He wasn't as cold. Childish, argumentative, but not cold.

They stood for some time in the darkness together, pouting.

"You said you wanted to talk to me," the thief reminded him, scowling.

"I did. But not when you're being a jerk," Ryou said, crossing his arms.

The thief glared.

"If I promise not to be a jerk, will you talk to me?"

Ryou leaned in closer, "Yeah. Promise."

"I promise."

(Ryou's heart fluttered.)

"What are you doing here?"

The thief snorted. "I don't know. I just woke up and I was here. The last thing I remember…"

He frowned, and pressed his lips together.

"I don't really remember what I was doing before I woke up…"

Ryou's eyes widened, "Do you remember anything?"

"Of course I remember things!" he snarled, "I'm not an idiot. I remember that brat Malik and his stupid plans. I remember the Pharaoh and his container defeating me."

A pause.

"I remember you. It's just sometimes…" the thief's voice regained its harsh edge, its anger, "The memories are fuzzy. Like…like…"

Ryou's heart pounded in his chest. He thought it would burst any second.

"Like looking through foggy glass, or trying to see through thick fog!" Ryou shouted.

The thief blinked, startled by Ryou's odd behavior.

"Yeah. Exactly like that," the thief knitted his eyebrows together, "How did you know?"

"That's what happens when you're controlled by the darkness," Ryou said softly, a sweet epiphany dawning on him, "You were controlled by the darkness…!"

Tears stung the back of Ryou's eyes. After years (millenniums, even?), finally, finally someone understood. Without a moment's hesitation, Ryou flung himself into the thief's arms.

The thief gasped out in surprise.

(But didn't exactly resist.)

-0-

"He forgave you?"

"Yes! Yes! For the third time yes, Malik. Don't make me hurt you."

"You? I thought he would never so much as talk to you…much less hug you…"

"So. When are you going to see him?"

"Right now!"

-0-

There was a knock on Ryou's door.

Ryou opened it to find a dishevelled Malik, panting and wheezing.

"I just ran all the way across town to see you," he gasped out.

The white haired boy blinked, and then let him in.

"Do you want some tea?"

"Are you still mad at me?"

(Malik. Blunter than a lead pipe.)

"That depends," Ryou said, "Are you sorry?"

"For talking to Bakura? No way! I mean, yeah, he's a total bastard at times but he's not ev-"

Ryou cut Malik off, "Are you sorry for lying to me?"

Malik eyes widened, but then he looked away.

"Yeah."

"Then I'm not mad at you anymore."

Malik perked up, "Really? It was that easy?"

Ryou nodded.

"Why didn't you just tell me, though? I would have been upset…but it would have been better than me having to find out like that. Though I can't imagine why you talked to him in the first place," Ryou said with a sigh.

Malik dodged Ryou's gaze.

"I talked to him because I figured if he had somehow changed, then maybe I'd changed after all. Really changed. If he got his second chance and deserved it, maybe I deserved my second chance, too."

"Malik," Ryou said, completely taken aback.

"I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to hate me," Malik continued, "You're probably the best thing that's ever happened to me."

-0-

Yuugi said he'd stopped by the museum to check out the new exhibit.

(But Ryou was sure it was just a polite way of saying 'I told you so'.)

-0-

"Why do you think they came back?" Ryou asked, as he stirred his tea.

"Honestly?" Malik said.

Ryou nodded.

"Maybe the Gods realized that you and Yuugi were so utterly messed up, that bringing them back couldn't do anything but help."

Ryou stared at him for a long time. Then laughed.

Malik laughed along with him.

-0-

"It changed you, didn't it?" Ryou said, facing the rising sun, "Whatever brought you back."

The thief shifted his hand over Ryou's shoulder lazily.

"I don't know," he whispered, voice softer than normal, "Everything's such a blur. I remember the hate I felt so clearly, it's almost like feeling it. You called me that, once. Hate. It burned in me for so long… I don't think that can change. I don't think I can ever be more than that."

The thief turned to him, his grey eyes smothering. There was a quiet innocence to his face while he waited for a response.

Ryou turned to, again, face the sun.

"I think we can."

* * *

A/N Will comment on the OMG OVER 500 REVIEWS later when more coherent. =D


	70. Of Choices and Sins

A/N Just have to put this here to get the format to work.

* * *

_Evil is just a point of view ~ Anne Rice_

* * *

"Ready yet, Landlord?" the spirit asks, leaning on his soul's doorway.

Ryou doesn't look up quite yet. He isn't ready. There was still too much in this room, too much dust, too many pictures, too many memories. Amane's letters are still under his bed. (His shoulders slump a bit, knowing what she will think of him after this.)

But that's okay, in an odd way. It makes sense. She (even Amane) could never understand. No one could ever understand.

(The screams mean nothing unless you've heard them yourself.)

Ryou reaches up to the picture frame closest to his bed, and traces the face with his fingers.

Yuugi.

He wonders. Would Yuugi understand?

(Does it _matter?)_

Wide violet eyes stare back at him. Innocent. Ryou could still be innocent if he wanted. No blood was on his hands yet. (If he wanted…)

But he doesn't want innocence. He wants fire and darkness and he wants all of the world to hear the screams he's had to hear.

Is that wrong? Is that evil?

The spirit would answer him, if asked. But Ryou keeps his mouth shut. His other's presence is enough. The spirit only needs to be there for Ryou to feel…

(…intoxicated, spell bound, hurt, honest...)

Sinful.

(Once, after a nightmare made of fire, Ryou had asked his mother to make a list of all things that he would go to that burning place for. His mother, groggy from lack of sleep, told him that he already knows, that you can't hurt or harm others, and to avoid temptation. But it wasn't enough, Ryou needed to know it all. So his mother wrapped her arms around him, and said as long as he tried to be a good person, he wouldn't have to worry about fire.)

And here he was. Trying to be a good person.

The spirit is his temptation.

…And it's inviting, his sin.

(Their sin.)

Ryou smiles softly.

The picture (with wide innocent eyes) in the frame turns to ashes. To sand.

"Ready."

* * *

A/N Because I'm overdue for an evil!Ryou story.

Also, can I just say you guys, the readers, are amazing? Over 500 hundred reviews - that's half of one thousand! I never in a million years imagined that I'd have a hundred reviews on this story, much less five times that. So thank you, everyone who has reviewed (or alerted, or faved), thank you so much.

I'm so grateful.


	71. Eternity

A/N FORMAT.

* * *

_Depth of friendship does not depend on length of acquaintance. ~ Rabindranath Tagore _

* * *

It wakes him from his sleep, whatever it is.

Like a knife, drilling through his head. Ryou feels pain and violation all at once. And then it just stops.

He looks around his soul room. Every picture frame is in order, all of his games are in place. Nothing has changed.

Ryou frowns. Something has changed. He knows it. But if it is something (and it is), and the spirit wanted it to happen (Ryou doesn't for a second consider that the spirit might not know, the spirit knows everything)…what can he do?

("You're so worthless, host. And you will do nothing.")

Cringing, Ryou buries his head in his pillow, blocking out everything. His nice, neat prison cell is unchanged and that's all that matters. The outside world doesn't concern him anymore. It can't.

(Nothing.)

The word echoes for eternity, and never loses its meaning.

-0-

And that's the first moment Ryou realizes something is wrong. The spirit never uses the door. Sometimes he'll just appear or the door will vanish, but he never uses it. Ryou didn't even think that the door could be used (after all, no one goes in or out of it), it always seemed for show.

Ryou's body tenses as the door swings open.

A boy walks in. He is Egyptian, obviously, from the gold draped on him and his dark tan skin. Blonde hair, though, and bright lavender eyes.

He eyes Ryou up and down, then snorts.

"So you're his host. Heh. No wonder he called you weak."

"I'm not his anything," Ryou says, automatically. It isn't until the words are out of him that he understands that this boy must know the spirit.

Ryou wraps his arms around himself. The spirit never brings anything but darkness…shouldn't that include this intruder?

The boy looks amused.

"You definitely have his temper too," he strides closer, "Not that yours is even half as intimidating. You still look so fragile."

The boy chuckles.

Ryou's eyes narrow. This boy is mocking him. As if the indignities that the spirit constantly forces upon Ryou are not enough, this…stranger has the nerve to break into the manifestation of his soul and mock him.

"Who are you?" Ryou hisses, "Why are you here?"

(Of course, what he really means is, 'Why is the spirit letting you be here?')

"Malik," the boy answers, "And I'm here because I can be. You won't do anything about it."

The last sentence sends shivers down Ryou's spine, and makes him hate Malik all the more.

Malik flicks one of Ryou's picture frames.

"What are these?" he asks.

"Photos. They all have a meaning, I think. They are all supposed to represent something about me."

Ryou really shouldn't have responded, because frankly this boy, Malik, was a jerk. But, the last person Ryou has spoken to in forever is the spirit. And mostly, the spirit doesn't talk. He just watches.

(And Ryou would prefer jerks to darkness.)

"So…this is all of you," Malik sneers, looking around, "You're so boring."

Ryou again takes that insult to heart, even though he should be used to them. (By now.)

"What is your name, anyway?" Malik asks.

"Ryou Bakura," Ryou says, without hesitation.

"Ryou," Malik tries it out, and comes closer to Ryou, sitting on his small mattress in the corner.

Ryou backs up against the wall. Malik opens his mouth to say something, but then something catches his eye.

"What's that?" he asks, pointing at a small wooden chest at the foot of the light blue covers.

Ryou's eyes widen and he snatches the chest away.

"Nothing!" Ryou snaps, pulling the chest close to him.

Malik blinks, startled by Ryou's sudden action, and then glares.

"Let me see it," he orders.

Ryou's fingertips twitch, but then it hits him. Malik is not the spirit. So Ryou, he can say…

"No!"

Malik, who was so sure he had Ryou pegged, glares again.

"I want to see it! Let me see it!" Malik shouts, bizarrely like a child.

Again, with more force this time, Ryou says, "No!"

Malik curses in a language Ryou doesn't understand, and attacks Ryou.

"Give me that box!" he yells as he wrestles Ryou across his bed. Ryou clings to the chest tighter and desperately tries to push Malik off with his feet.

(The air suddenly feels colder, stiffer.)

"Just what exactly..." says a dark, shadowy voice, "Is going on?"

The spirit appears, leaning against Ryou's doorframe.

(The door has vanished.)

Ryou freezes, the slow terror that the spirit always brings slowing down his breathing. Malik stops too.

The spirit glowers at Malik, "Get out."

Malik, returning the spirit's stare, gets off of Ryou.

"Or what?" Malik snarls.

The Millennium Ring glows.

"Or I'll make you."

Malik sneers at the threat, but by his posture Ryou can tell he's threatened. And it's only now that he notices something. On Malik's waist, is a…well, a rod, you could say. It has the same eye on it that his Ring does. It's a Millennium Item.

Ryou suppresses a gasp. So that's why the spirit has allowed him here, even though they so plainly hate each other. Malik has a Millennium Item.

This time Ryou really does gasp. And if Ryou thought that either one of them would listen to him, he would have told them to stop fighting because the last thing he wants is a shadow duel in his soul.

But Ryou says nothing. And they stand there, hating each other.

Finally, Malik closes his eyes and laughs.

"Fine, I'll leave your precious host alone, Bakura, for the time being," Malik says as he walks past the spirit and out of Ryou's room.

Ryou watches him go, feeling more confused than he has in a long time. He meets the spirit's eyes.

The spirit's stare travels down to what Ryou is holding. They have emotion (they always do) but Ryou can never decipher it.

The spirit snorts under his breath, "Still?"

Ryou casts his head down, but clutches the chest tighter regardless.

-0-

His days are supposed to seam together flawlessly. Time doesn't exist here, everything lasts forever.

But Malik disrupted that. Ryou is aware of time now, before and after that event. He knows it and on some level, feels the days tick by.

(He realizes that more than his body is being stolen…)

The spirit hasn't told Ryou that he knows about this change, but Ryou assumes he knows anyway. Why wouldn't he?

Though there is a difference, there also isn't. He feels the days slip by him, but the days play out just as they did before.

Ryou is trapped in here (eternally) and the spirit roams about. Occasionally, he'll…visit… (that's not the right word at all, but Ryou has no words to describe the spirit) and then he'll leave.

"Who is he?" Ryou asks one day, while the spirit is watching him.

The spirit looks at him from across the room. The distance is great.

"No one to concern yourself with, landlord."

And that's the end of it.

(Hopefully.)

-0-

Wishful thinking.

The door rattles, and there is not a single person in the entire universe that it could be other than-

"Malik," Ryou says, as the boy steps in.

"You remembered my name. How sweet," he mocks, crossing his arms.

Ryou sighs.

"Why are you here, again?"

"It pisses him off. Which is reason enough, but I'm also going to find out why," Malik says, smirking.

Ryou shakes his head, "Why do you care? Aren't you guys…well, you have to be something."

Malik looks genuinely perplexed.

"You mean he hasn't told you?"

Ryou hunches over, "He never tells me anything."

Malik steps towards him. (Malik goes so much farther into his soul then the spirit does…)

That bothers Ryou, more than he would have thought.

"What's in that chest?" he asks again. Ryou sighs. He's tired, these separate days have made him weary.

"Letters," he answers truthfully, "From my sister."

Malik blinks, "That's it?"

Ryou nods.

"You were willing to fight me over that?"

Ryou frowns, "They're personal. I didn't want a complete stranger to read them."

"So. I walk into your soul and you're worried about me reading your letters," Malik shakes head, "You need to get your priorities in order."

"You wouldn't understand," Ryou mutters, "Can you go talk to him? Leave me alone."

Malik snorts, "Like I'd want to spend quality time with that bastard."

Ryou puts his hands to his temples. Figuring out where he stood with the spirit was hard enough, but combining it with Malik was just excruciating …

"You still didn't answer my question," Ryou points out.

"So?" Malik snaps, "I don't have to do anything I don't want to."

(Malik is extraordinarily childish sometimes.)

"It's only fair, I answer your questions," Ryou says.

Malik smirks.

"Alright, I'll tell you what I am to him, if you tell me what you are to him."

Ryou is taken aback.

"But I don't know," he asserts.

"You must have a guess," Malik says.

Ryou looks down.

"I'm his host. Nothing more. I'm the vessel that he needs to use."

(All the things the spirit has told Ryou himself…)

Malik scowls, "That's it?"

"That's it."

"There has to be something more!" Malik says, coming within feet of Ryou's bed, "He's so protective of you and whenever I mention you he-"

Ryou cuts him off.

"That's it."

Malik's eyes burn.

"There is more, and I'll find out what it is even if I have to stay here forever."

Ryou doesn't tell Malik that forever is a moot point now, because time moves again. In fact, he ignores Malik entirely, in favor of his slightly dusty blue wall.

Malik reaches out and grabs Ryou's hand.

Ryou shakes off Malik's touch. No one has been in this room other than the spirit, and the spirit never takes more than three steps inside. But Malik, he waltzes in and just…doesn't do things the way they are supposed to be done.

"What was that for?" Ryou asks.

Malik smirks (again).

"To see if I could."

-0-

"I told you," Bakura said, voice ice cold, "To stay away from him."

"Relax," Malik snaps, "It's not like I'm looking through your soul. And there's nothing you can do to stop me, anyway. You still want the Millennium Rod, right? Then you'll have to follow my orders."

Bakura's eyebrow twitches.

"Listen, brat," he sneers, "If I catch you in my host's soul one more time-"

"What's the big deal?" Malik says, "I think Ryou enjoys my company."

Bakura snorts, "Now that's amusing."

Malik narrows his eyes, "Whatever. It's not like I'm hurting him. We just talk."

The lavender-eyed boy waits for Bakura to say something, but no words ever come. He just sneers and turns around.

The sweet victory makes Malik smirk.

"Fine," Bakura snarls, "But if you don't stop meddling with my mind, I will-"

Again, Malik cuts him off.

"I'll stop at Ryou. Promise."

Bakura rolls his eyes.

In the silence, Malik takes the opportunity to ask a question that has been bothering him since he first met Ryou.

"Is he always like that?" Malik asks.

"Like what?" Bakura asks, bored and annoyed.

"Like only half there. Like he's ignoring you half the time?"

Bakura eyes harden, and Malik knows it must mean something, but he can't figure it out.

"Yes," his voice regains its cold edge, "Now don't you have some place to be?"

-0-

Ryou lets out a huge sigh.

"Again?" he asks, exasperated.

Malik struts in, "Don't sound so disappointed, shouldn't you be happy that I haven't gotten bored of you yet?"

Ryou's eyes steel up a bit, the way they do every time someone says something hurtful. (Or truthful, since those things seem to be one and the same now.)

"Maybe I've gotten bored of you," Ryou says.

Malik rolls his eyes, "Being mean doesn't suit you, Ryou."

"You don't even know me," Ryou whispers, "Why do you act like you do?"

Malik touches a picture frame. From where Ryou is, he can't see which one. (And even if he could, he wouldn't want to know.)

"You're not that hard to figure out," Malik says.

"Then why are you still here? There's no mystery left for you to solve," Ryou pleads.

"You're really ungrateful. I'm giving you company in this place."

Ryou flinches, "Having company in prison doesn't make it any less of a prison."

Malik perks up, "Is that what you think this is? Prison?"

"How could it be anything but?" Ryou asks, shaking his head.

"I don't know," Malik says, trailing his finger around Ryou's room, "Maybe a shelter. He's hell-bent on protecting you from the outside."

"He's not protecting me!" Ryou shouts, enraged (and part of him knows this is exactly what Malik wanted), "He's imprisoning me! He keeps me away and trapped here because he knows that if I was in control for one second I would stop him! I wouldn't let him hurt any of my friends ever again! He keeps me here to keep me out of the way!"

Malik takes a step back. It dawns on him.

"You hate him," he says, both shocked and awed.

("How could I not?" Ryou mumbles, the rage gone, but he's sure Malik didn't hear him.)

"Ha!" Malik laughs, "I knew I'd find something worthwhile eventually."

-0-

Ryou doesn't say anything when he walks in, which annoys Malik to no end. He's been around Ryou long enough to understand that a lack of words doesn't mean acceptance, it means denial.

The anger only feeds Malik's real reason for coming here again. He always knew that Ryou was Bakura's weakness, but he would never have thought that Bakura was Ryou's weakness as well. No wonder they were so co-dependent.

He tells himself it's to learn more information about the mysterious Spirit of the Ring, but really, it's for the look that was in Ryou's eyes.

Malik hates Ryou a little bit. At least, sometimes. The white-haired boy is always curled up in that corner of his and never does anything. And those stupid big brown eyes of his always have this wishy-washy look to them, like Ryou is simultaneously looking through him and past him.

Malik always feels like Ryou is ignoring him. But that day, when he pushed Ryou's button, his eyes had been one-hundred percent there. Ryou looked right at him.

That was satisfying, for reasons unknown to even him.

So he's come with a purpose this time, to goad Ryou into another one of his screaming fits, make him reveal something again.

"Ryou," Malik calls out to him.

Ryou looks up, but not really. His eyes are only halfway there again.

"I never did answer your question. Do you remember? About what I am to Bakura?" Malik says, and steps closer.

As he always does - Ryou's very predictable - he cringes at 'Bakura'.

"I remember," Ryou says softly, too softly, "But does it matter?"

"A deal's a deal."

"Maybe I'm better off not knowing," Ryou says and looks to the ground, "That's what the spirit said."

It boggles Malik's mind thinking about Ryou and Bakura talking. They're both so stoic and the only thing that brings anything out of either of them is each other. That bothers Malik a bit, thinking about it. Can Bakura get more out of Ryou than he can? Can Ryou get more out of Bakura that he can?

"You're kind of pathetic, you know that?" Malik lashes out, "You'd honestly prefer your ignorance? I thought you wanted to save Yuugi?"

Ryou's head shoots up and his eyes harden, but only for a second. He melts back into his fetal position.

"I couldn't save him, even when I tried."

"Not that Bakura is that dangerous," Malik snorts, "It's funny, actually. You act as if he's an unstoppable force, nothing but pure darkness."

And that thing happens when he's around Ryou too much. The truth spills out of him.

"You have no idea what true darkness is…"

Ryou trembles, which surprises Malik. He's never seen that before. And it doesn't make him feel guilty or taste something bitter in his mouth at all.

"Get out," Ryou says, without opening his eyes.

"What?"

"I said," Ryou clenches his fists, but still does not look at Malik, "Get out!"

-0-

"Do you like him?" Ryou asks, breaking their silence.

The spirit snorts, "No."

Ryou doesn't ask anything else, because strangely enough, that was all the comfort he needed.

-0-

Malik knows a lot of things.

He knows that, for whatever reason, Bakura really likes to keep Ryou safe. He knows that Bakura really wants his Millennium Item and hates the Pharaoh almost as much as he does.

And he also knows that Bakura would never be stupid enough to sacrifice the duel just because Ryou was squirming a little-!

-0-

His room is the same. It gives him a feeling a comfort and safety when he is repressed again.

Time doesn't pass, it crawls by in stunted increments. Malik. It's all his fault.

(Ryou might even hate him…)

The spirit appears. He's breathing heavily, but he's there.

"You're hurt," Ryou says, more surprised than concerned. After all, it is the spirit.

The spirit sneers, "The Egyptian Gods are powerful."

Ryou looks away, "The Ring's gone, isn't?"

The spirit nods.

"That's why you're here," Ryou muses, "And the reason I can't wake up?"

"And you're too weak to wake up yourself," the spirit says.

Silence.

"Why did you save me?" Ryou blurts out.

"You say that as if I did it for you. Heh. I did it for your body. I need you to survive."

That could be truth. Ryou runs through the words in his head again. It could. (And most of it, it would make sense, line up with all the spirit's other actions…predictable…)

But the spirit is never predictable.

"You really think Yuugi would have done it?" Ryou asks, unsure himself.

"I couldn't risk it," the spirit snaps.

"You could," Ryou counters, "You just…didn't."

Ryou looks up at him, at lost. Nothing makes sense anymore.

"Why?"

-0-

When Malik comes back (and Ryou knows it, that drilling sensation floods him), Ryou wants to ask the spirit if Malik is really worth the Millennium Rod.

Of course, he already knows the answer, so it's pointless.

-0-

"Me again," Malik says, softly, as he opens the door to Ryou's soul.

Ryou can't see him fully, but he can already tell Malik's changed. Though, he supposes, having your body ripped away from you would humble someone.

"What do you want, Malik?" Ryou asks, sighing.

Malik steps in. His walk is still a strut, but his eyes are tender.

"I'm not sure, actually," Malik snorts to himself, "I just thought I should see you."

"You were going to let me die!" Ryou says, sounding more hurt than he thought.

"I was not!" Malik says back huffily, "Like the Pharaoh was really going to attack! Ra, you and your other always overreact when it comes to each other."

"We do not!" Ryou snaps back. (They hardly react to each other at all.)

"Do too."

"Do not!'

"Do too!"

"Do - ugh!" Ryou exclaims, "I'm not having this conversation."

Malik glares at him for second, then laughs.

Ryou's eyes widen. The laugh is not condescending or dark, it's just a laugh.

Malik sits himself at the other edge of Ryou's bed.

"Do you know what's going on?" Malik asks. His voice doesn't have the laugh in it anymore. (Ryou misses that.)

Ryou shakes his head, "Some. All I know is that you and the ring are back. And you…um, don't have a body…"

Malik looks to the ground, and Ryou leans in closer because of it. Avoiding eye contact is weakness, right? And Malik's never showed him weakness.

"What happened, Malik?"

"My darkness…he took over me. He…forced…me out," Malik says, gritting his teeth.

Ryou tilts his head.

"He almost..." Malik is shaking in rage now, "He almost killed Rishid! And it would have been all my fault…I'm going to get my body. I'm not going to let him hurt anyone else."

Ryou is struck by Malik's words. They're so noble.

"He's evil?" Ryou asks, "Your darkness?"

Malik looks at him, "Nothing but."

"It must be nice," Ryou says, in that air-light voice of his, "To be so certain that he is darkness. Irredeemable."

It dawns on Malik.

"You don't hate him," he says, both incredulous and amazed.

Ryou looks away.

"I try."

Suddenly, Ryou feels something grab onto his hand. He looks up and Malik's fingers are intertwined with his.

"That's okay, you know," Malik says, caringly (something Ryou hasn't experienced in God knows how long), "To be on our side."

Ryou stares at Malik for a long time, before he squeezes Malik's hand back.

-0-

Even though Ryou's not angry, his eyes don't have that dullness to them. Malik feels a smirk coming on. Victory, however meaningless in the scheme of things, was still a victory.

Ryou jumps a bit, and his eyes regain that wishy-washy feel. He tenses too.

"Ryou, what-?"

"Malik," Bakura sneers, "Just what exactly are you doing?"

The Egyptian in question turns to see Bakura standing in the doorway. He's such a buzz kill.

Bakura's eyes travel down to Malik and Ryou's hands.

Malik chuckles.

"Jealous, Bakura?" he asks.

Bakura glares. "Get away from him."

"No," Malik says, enjoying rubbing this in his face all too much. He glances at Ryou, but Ryou's eyes are glued to Bakura.

Malik looks to Bakura, who is in turn staring at Ryou. It was kind of funny, actually. They were physically the same body but looked so different. Ryou was such a marshmallow, and then Bakura was all hard edges. Even their eyes were different. Ryou's eyes were shallow and soft - too soft - whereas Bakura's eyes were too dark and hard.

Malik makes a soft 'oh' sound. He gets it now. They each have what the other is missing.

"Wow," he mutters to himself, "You two have the weirdest relationship ever."

Ryou, ignoring Malik's comment, looks at them both. He speaks slowly, as if just then he's decided on something important.

"You could stay longer, if you'd like."

* * *

A/N LATE UPDATE IS LATE. -ashamed- I tried so hard guys, I was finishing up the planned oneshot and then suddenly my muse was all 'THAT ONESHOT SUCKS AND YOU NEED TO WRITE A NEW ONE. BUT I WON'T GIVE YOU INSPIRATION FOR TWO DAYS AND THEN WHEN I FINALLY DO YOU HAVE TO WRITE THIS IN A DAY! MMWWWHAAAHAHAHA.'

Anyway. I pretty much D: all weekend.

Reviews will make me feel so much better!


	72. A Tea Party with Amane

A/N Oh ff . net. You and your format issues.

* * *

_I hope she doesn't have to see/What became of her family/Her father left after she died/Her brothers cried and cried and cried ~ The Miracle That Never Came, Straylight Run _

* * *

"And he'd sit right there, where you are now!" shouted Amane Bakura.

Bakura eyed the girl askance, not amused in the slightest. He took a sip out his pink plastic tea cup, anyway. To humor the girl.

"Do you like it? I'm not as good as Mommy or Ryou, but I made it myself!" she grinned and it covered her whole face.

This child annoyed him. She was nothing like her brother. She was far too happy, especially for being dead and all.

"It's delicious," Bakura sneered, "Now, what exactly do you want?"

"You're not suppose to be rude at tea parties," she huffed.

"_Well_?"

Amane rubbed her arm and furrowed her brows. A habit she and his former host shared.

"Do you…do you know if Big Brother is happy?"

He nearly broke the cup. "_No_."

The girl's bottom lip trembled, "But he wrote about you all that time! Don't you visit him? You've had to have visited him! You have to know! You have to tell me!"

Bakura didn't _visit _anyone. All the people he'd missed and hated for were here. Dead. Well, there was that one time he'd spied on Malik just for the hell of it, but that was something spurred on entirely by boredom. One can only torment the Pharaoh so long before it gets old.

He didn't think about his former host. Ever. He didn't want to.

"No," he repeated again, less harshly. The girl was only a child, after all.

"But…why?" Amane cried, tears leaking down her face, "Mommy doesn't visit Ryou anymore, either. It used to be Daddy _and _Ryou, but now it's just Daddy. I don't understand…and Mommy won't let me see him! I'd visit him _forever _but she won't let me!"

Bakura looked away.

"I used to be able to know some of his story! He'd write me letters!" she exclaimed, and pointed to the scatter papers that Bakura was all too familiar with, "They were always so sad…"

Yet another reason why he never thinks of his former host.

"But now they've just…stopped," Amane said, the softest she's spoken yet, "I don't understand…"

Of course you wouldn't, Bakura snapped to himself, you're a child. But even here (after all those years of darkness, the _irony_!), he can't ignore that budding sensation in the back of his mind. Damn Guilt.

Amane closed her eyes and shook her head, violently, "I want to know what's happening! I want to see my brother's happy ending! I _have _to save him. If I could just see him, I know I could save him!"

Bakura put down his cup.

"Stop crying," he ordered, "We'll go. Okay? We'll go."

She looked up, smiling though the tears were still in her eyes. Amane took Bakura's callous hands into her own small ones.

They left.

* * *

A/N Reviews, please!


	73. The Most Bitter Type of Worth

A/N Dedicated to **ACE329**. I hope you enjoy it, despite the fact that I took the song way too literally.

Warnings: AU. Tendershippy.

* * *

_Black dresses flood the cemetery/in this cliche tragedy ~ Black Dresses, Spill Canvas_

* * *

It's that dream again.

The graveyard. He shouldn't recognize it, but he does. Standing on top of a grassy hill, he looks down at the tombstones. The wind blows the sounds of screams and sirens towards him, but he doesn't move.

Someone whispers in his ear –

"Big brother, I'm home!" shouts Amane, startling Ryou out of his sleep.

"Amane!" Ryou shoots up, knocking over a glass of water on his computer desk as he scrambles to his feet.

His (not so) little sister winks at him.

"You're drooling, Ryou."

"Amane!" Ryou repeats, wiping the drool from his face, "What are you doing here?"

"My flight came in a little early," she says, dropping her coat on the couch. Well, she assumes it's a couch, though it's hard to tell from all the junk lying on it.

Ryou hurries to clear a spot for her to sit down.

"You should have called me," Ryou scolds, "I would have picked you up!"

"I didn't feel like waiting and besides," she smiles, "I wanted to surprise you!"

Ryou sighs. His sister was so incredibly difficult.

But then, slowly, the warmth of her smile thaws him out and he realizes that's Amane is _here_ in front of him. Not at college three hours away, but here, in his living room.

He laughs and pulls her into a hug.

"I've missed you so much," he murmurs into her ear.

Amane hugs him back.

"I've missed you too, big brother."

Amane pulls away, and takes another look around the dingy apartment.

"Geez, Ryou. When's the last time you cleaned?"

Her gaze falls to the pile of empty ramen cups.

"When's the last time you _ate_? You know, like real food?"

Ryou blushes, "I eat! I just happen to like ramen."

Amane snorts and turns her head to the computer desk, literally spilling over with loose paperwork, folders and scribbled notes on fast food napkins.

"You work too hard," Amane sighs, "and you don't eat enough."

Ryou opens his mouth to protest both assertions, but her smile shushes him.

"Come on. Let's go get you something to eat."

-0-

"Hi! Welcome to Palace World! My name's Yuugi and I'll be your server for this evening," says Yuugi, smiling so widely his eyes are closed.

"Hey, Yuugi-kun," Ryou replies.

"Oh hey Ryou!" Yuugi says, looking a bit embarrassed, "I didn't even recognize you for a second. It must be the grease…it's going to my head…"

Ryou smiles, "I want you to meet my sister, Amane."

Yuugi turns his head slightly, "Oh so you're Amane! Ryou's told me everything about you; you're like his favorite subject!"

Amane gives Ryou a bemused look.

"You two know each other?" she asks.

"Of course!" says Yuugi before Ryou can explain, "Ryou-kun and I have known each other since forever. We went to school together and on Sundays we work the graveyard shift here."

Amane frowns, "You didn't tell me you were working weekends again."

Ryou sighs. He doesn't want to fight with her right now, not so soon after her homecoming. Doesn't she understand that he works those three jobs so she can go to school and not have to worry about it? He'd give her the world if he could, but he can't, so the best he can do is work a few hours during the weekend…

Yuugi, ever the mind-reader, senses the awkwardness and changes the subject.

"So!" he says, "Do you know what you're ordering?"

Ryou nods and shoots Yuugi a grateful smile.

They order and Yuugi isn't even completely out of earshot when Amane says, "He's nice, I like him. You should hang out with him more."

_I can't, I have to work_, Ryou thinks but after the look Amane had given him before, he doesn't dare say it.

"We do hang out, all the time," Ryou assures.

Amane gives him her pouty stare, and Ryou is sure she knows he's lying. (Well, technically only half-way lying, they hang out all the time at work.)

A flash of white, out of the corner of his eye. Ryou blinks as he sees a man, strikingly similar – doppelganger similar – to himself, walking out of the restaurant. He meets Ryou's gaze (and Ryou can feel the blush coming on, despite himself) and turns away…

…Ryou's stomach lurches…

"Big brother? Ryou? Ryou! Hey, Ryou snap out of it!"

"Hmm? Amane, what is it?"

"You were like completely zoned out!" she says, almost pouting, "Is something wrong?"

"No, of course not," he replies quickly.

(It feels like he's lying.)

-0-

"I'm not taking your bed, Ryou," Amane says, and puts her hand on her hip. She's still so childish, in so many ways.

It's stupid too. The bed is already made; blue covers tucked in neatly and her suitcase unpacked on the hardwood floor.

Ryou runs his hand through his hair.

"You're only here for a week, Amane, it's not that big a deal. Besides, you're my guest. Let me be a good host, okay?" he says, and places his hand on her shoulder.

She pouts, "Every time I come here, I take your bed. Ever think maybe I'd like the couch if I tried it?"

"No," Ryou replies firmly, "Plus, I wouldn't be able to sleep if I knew you were sleeping on the couch."

Amane gives a big exaggerated sigh.

"Next time – no matter what you say – I'm sleeping on the couch," she grunts.

Ryou laughs and turns off the lights.

-0-

"Your sister's really nice, but she seems a little worried about you," Yuugi says as he sprays the cleaning solution on the table. Ryou smiles too, but the dark circles under his eyes sort of lessen the impact.

"Yeah, she is," Ryou admits, "If her old friends from high school hadn't wanted to go out, I don't think she would have let me work tonight."

He gives a small laugh at the end of it, to lighten up the grim reality of the words.

Yuugi understands in the way only _Yuugi_ can and they go back to washing the tables. There is a nice silence for some time, before Yuugi looks up at Ryou with those curious purple eyes.

"Why did you two go to different schools anyway?"

Ryou looks away. (His stomach quivers.)

"Our parents wanted it that way."

-0-

"And, oh my god," Amane says between bursts of laughter, "the look on your face, Ryou!"

Ryou is laughing too, though not as loud.

"I can't believe you still remember that," he says, voice betraying a touch of sorrow.

"Of course," Amane giggles (though her voice, too, is hiding something), "I remember everything about our parents."

That kills all the laughter and leaves Ryou with only the echoes. They finish the walk home in silence, both realizing they've crossed some line that hadn't been there before.

Ryou loses himself so much in the memories of their parents that he doesn't even realize he's being watched.

-0-

_Big Brother! _

_Sorry. Left in the middle of the night. You know how much I hate goodbyes._

_~ Amane_

There's a crudely drawn heart next to her name, as if that somehow makes up for it.

Ryou sighs and traces it with his fingers, anyway.

(Some things never change.)

-0-

"But Mrs. Saito – I swear I can pay everything – the late fees, everything! If you could just wait until Friday! Please…"

Ryou looks away. He's begging. He _hates_ begging. More than his stupid minimum wage jobs, more than his idiotic bosses, more than the driver of that car…

Bile rises in his throat.

(Disgusting. He is disgusting.)

Mrs. Saito glares at them with those beady eyes of hers. She does it on purpose. Ryou always invites her into the apartment, to discuss things, but she must always do it outside of his door. In the hallways. Where everyone can hear.

"Please," he begs again, holding back his gag reflexes.

Mrs. Saito licks her lips, "I swear if your mother hadn't…ugh! Fine. You have until Monday, Ryou. That's it."

She slams the door of his apartment shut. The sound of finality.

Ryou sinks to the floor and wraps his knees around his chest.

"What am I going to do?"

-0-

"Yuugi-kun," Ryou asks slowly, still not sure if he should do this. Amane worries enough about him as is.

"Yes?" says Yuugi, as he puts the dishes up to dry.

"Do you know of any places hiring?"

Yuugi drops the plate he is holding on the floor.

"Mouto! You idiot!" shouts Kenji, the cook, along with some other colorful words.

"Are you…are you _serious_ Ryou?" Yuugi stutters out.

Ryou looks down, "I need the money."

(_Because apparently I'm not worth enough as is…_)

Yuugi tilts his head to the side and looks like he's about to cry. Then, he turns away.

"No. Sorry."

-0-

It must be some of kind of joke.

A sick, cruel, unholy, devil's spawn of a joke.

The money (enough to pay his rent for the next _two months_!) is stacked neatly in his mailbox, tied together with a red string. On it is a note.

_Meet me at the cemetery, tonight._

Drugs. It had to be drugs. Or gangs. Or the Yakuza.

He shouldn't take this money. He couldn't! A person who had that kind of money to give away but wanted to meet at the cemetery was not good news. Common sense told him as much.

(But…)

The money is so exact and in _his_ mailbox. This person (or persons, for all he knew) must know a lot about him. If he didn't show up on his own terms, they would find him. And, who knew, maybe they would be friendly…maybe they would just want to help…

Ryou crumples the note in his hand.

He'd go. And if these people were something bad, he'd refuse the money.

Probably.

-0-

Of all the stupid things he's ever done, this is, without a doubt, the stupidest. Shouldn't he at least have brought a weapon or something? Or a phone? Or just have not gone at all? This is suicide, this is just plain dumb. He should have left a note, or called Yuugi and told him at the very least where he was going.

Anything other than doing what he is now. Walking half way across town to the cemetery.

Ryou, for the hundredth time, stops. He inhales, taking in the scenery. The buildings are nicer on this side of town, painted with brighter colors. The sunset might have something to do with that, though. (He chose to go at sunset because there was no way he was going to a cemetery in the dead of night. Ryou did have some survival skills, after all.)

It was all because of that stupid note. If it hadn't been for that note, he would have just accepted the money as some divine miracle. Or if that note had been worded differently, he could have just ignored it. Stayed home, like a normal person. Besides, he is used to getting gifts. In high school, he'd always open his locker to find a box of chocolates or handmade gift.

But that _note_.

It isn't a love letter or a threat. It is a _command_.

And Ryou is obedient.

-0-

It's the graveyard from his dreams. Or, more accurately, the graveyard from his dreams is the Domino City Cemetery. Which is odd, because he's always known where the cemetery is…maybe he'd just forgotten what it looked like?

Yeah. That seemed plausible, right? (Though it didn't do anything for the goosebumps on his body.)

"Hello?" he asks, pushing the gates open. Ryou cringes. That was a stupid thing to ask. These people knew he needed money, and they knew where his mailbox was, so they must have some way of keeping track of him.

They must know he's here.

Ryou takes another step into the graveyard. He has the urge to speak again, just to hear something other than the deathly quiet. But he bites he tongue down, refusing to feel like an idiot once again.

"Hello."

Ryou nearly screams as a hand grazes across his shoulder. He jumps back and sees the source.

A man with a long black trench coat, standing with his arms crossed. White hair, like Ryou's hair, and brown eyes too. Though a darker brown, almost reddish actually, like mahogany. He is smirking. The smirk itself is ambiguous, but the man's eyes are amused.

Ryou frowns a bit, automatically. He should be terrified.

(But he isn't…)

"Well?" the man purrs as he steps forward, "Don't I get a thank you, Ryou?"

_He knows my name_, Ryou thinks and shivers. Even though he'd assumed that whoever left that note knew his name (his mailbox had his name on after all), to hear it was…unsettling.

"For what?" Ryou says and again cringes at the sound of his own voice. It's scared and shaky (and everything Ryou doesn't want to be –)

"The money. I thought you'd be more grateful for your gift," the man says, a threatening tone underlining the words.

Ryou looks at the man again. He is just threatening, period.

"I wasn't aware it was a gift, actually," Ryou says, feeling braver for whatever reason, "I figured it was bribe or something."

"Oh?" the man asks, shifting his position, "Explain."

(That too is a command and now Ryou is certain that this man wrote the note.)

"I don't know…Maybe like those car companies that will give you a free watch if you buy a new truck. I thought the money was the watch. That's why I came here, to read the fine print," Ryou says.

The man snorts, "I suppose that's for the best. You wouldn't have come here otherwise."

Ryou doesn't like this man. He is too definite. No questions or requests, just…orders.

"Well, a graveyard is a really creepy place to meet if you have good intentions," Ryou points out, honestly wondering if the man knows that.

"I never said I had good intentions."

Ryou shudders and he is positive that the man saw it. There was a gleam in his eyes.

"So what _are_ your intentions?" Ryou asks, feeling that inexplicable daringness again. He doesn't mean for it to happen, it just bubbles up inside of him. Bursts.

"I'm going to make you an offer," the man says, walking closer, "I've been watching you for some time, Ryou. You're desperate. I'm here to a give you a solution to your problems. You will become an associate of mine, taking part in the business I do."

Ryou recoils, "Business? You mean crime…don't you?"

His smirk widens, revealing sharp, almost canine, teeth.

"I mean crime."

"And if I refuse?" Ryou asks, the daring gone and replaced with cold fear, "If I say no?"

The man grabs hold of his wrist and pulls him close. Ryou gasps, but doesn't even struggle. His mind is in another place entirely.

"You won't."

The man's voice is strong and powerful.

(And Ryou is obedient.)

His heartbeat is pounding so fast it hurts. (He's tried. God knows he's tried being a good citizen, making the money the _right_ way…_right_…doing the _right_ thing…)

"Well?" the man says.

"I – I," Ryou stutters out.

(His heart is beating too fast and his head is about to explode and oh, God, his father would never approve and what would Mother say and –)

"Okay. Okay."

(His voice sounds disgustingly weak again…)

The man drops his wrist, rather rudely.

"We'll be in touch," he says and turns around.

"Wait!" Ryou shouts (that crazy courage back again), "What's your name?"

The man turns his head around, his expression unreadable. Finally, he speaks.

"Bakura."

-0-

"So I was talking to Jounouchi yesterday – you remember Jounouchi, right?" Yuugi asks.

"Yes," Ryou says as he scrubs the spaghetti sauce off the table, "I remember Jou."

"Well, he said that Chester's was hiring and they offer really flexible hours –"

Ryou cuts him off, "It's okay, Yuugi-kun. I'm not looking for work anymore. Everything worked itself out."

Yuugi blinks and then charges at him, embracing him in a tight hug.

"_Oh thank goodness!_"

-0-

_Meet me at Apartment 203, on Monday._

Ryou's not sure what's creepiest about the newest note. That his heart skipped a beat while reading it? That it still has that underlining commanding feel? Or that it was waiting for him on his kitchen counter?

He stares at it for another second.

Yeah, definitely the latter.

-0-

_I could change the lock_, Ryou thinks, _but he'd just pick that one too. And it would probably just make him mad, instead of stopping him._

Ryou still hasn't actually seen Bakura since their meeting a week ago; he just has this instinctual feeling that getting Bakura mad was something he did not want to do.

The phone rings, breaking him out of his thoughts.

"Hello?" Ryou says.

"Big brother! Guess what?" Amane screeches from the other end of the phone.

"What?" Ryou asks, suddenly a lot more at ease.

"I did it! I got an A on all of my midterms! All of them, Ryou! Can you believe it?!"

Ryou smiles, "I knew you would."

"I'm sorry I called so late but I just _had_ to tell you!" says Amane.

"I don't mind," Ryou says, but then adds, "but I can't talk long."

"Aw! Well, when can you talk? You know I can't come down to visit until spring break and I miss you…" she gripes.

"Call on…" (The note flashes through Ryou's mind), "Tuesday night."

"Kay! Talk to you then, Ryou!"

The other line clicks off. The happiness that Amane brings him wears off and Ryou is back to pondering about how to keep Bakura out of his apartment. Or, at the very least, to know when he's in it.

-0-

"That's…it?" Ryou asks, absolutely lost for words.

Bakura looks bored.

"That's it," he says, drumming his hands on Apartment 203's dining room table.

Ryou looks down at the small, perfectly plain envelope in his hands. So all he has to do is mail this little thing on Wednesday? _That's it_?

"Really?" Ryou asks again. Not what he was expecting from a life of crime.

"Really," says Bakura, and this time Ryou can see the anger building in his eyes.

"Sorry," Ryou mutters, "It's just not what I was…expecting…"

Bakura snorts, "I know you, Ryou. I know what you will and won't do."

"Well, I don't know you," snaps Ryou.

"_Obviously_."

Ryou narrows his eyes, suddenly infused with a small dose of rage.

"And I don't appreciate you breaking into my apartment and being really cryptic about this whole mess!"

Bakura laughs. It sends shivers down Ryou's spine.

"You don't appreciate it?" he mocks, "Well I'm sorry, Ryou. I don't care much what you think."

His eyes darken as he gets up from the table.

(Ryou's anxiety twists and turns in his stomach.)

Bakura stops, inches away from Ryou.

"I'll come to your house whenever it pleases me."

He walks away without another word.

(Ryou feels sullied.)

-0-

On Wednesday, the small envelope slips into the mailbox on the corner of the street without a fuss.

Ryou looks over his shoulder for the rest of the day.

-0-

_Enjoy. I'll be seeing you on Friday._

Says the small note, on a small stack of money.

On his bathroom counter.

Ryou sighs. Now Bakura is doing it just to spite him.

-0-

"You seem happier," Yuugi notes the next day at work.

It shocks Ryou so badly that he almost drops his plate of food. Happier? After the things he was doing? (Did he even _know_ what he was doing?) Maybe less stressed, he would have accepted less stressed. After all, his new job certainly provided him with more stability. (And, to his secret horror, it had no effect on his morality.) In all honestly, at the rate things were going, if he didn't have Amane he could probably quit this job and work at the book store full time.

Ryou grimaces. _Didn't have Amane_. He can't believe he just thought that.

He closes his eyes. The money is going to his head. He doesn't even know what it's for, or from, or who he was hurting, if he was hurting anyone…

(…and he didn't even want to know, not really…)

But, maybe it's true what they say. Ignorance is bliss.

"Yeah," Ryou whispers, "I guess I am."

-0-

"I want to know what we're doing," Ryou says, trying his best to sound firm and powerful.

"We?" says Bakura faintly amused.

"We," Ryou repeats.

Bakura twiddles his fingers on the loose string dangling from Ryou's couch. It was disturbing how at home he was in Ryou's own apartment.

"No, you don't," Bakura says, with a tinge of bitterness.

"Yes, I do," Ryou states.

Bakura looks up at him. Ryou adds that to the ever growing list of things Bakura does that creeps him out. Looking into him. Burning into him.

"You don't want to know at all," Bakura sneers, "If you did, you would have opened an envelope by now. It's been a month. You haven't even _peeked_, Ryou."

Ryou flinches and wants to protest more but…(he's right).

"But I –" Ryou falters, "I should, though. I should want to know."

"But you don't," Bakura says, smirking.

"I don't," Ryou admits and turns away.

"You worry too much," Bakura snaps, "Nothing bad has happened to you yet, so nothing will. There is no _reason_ for you to know."

If Ryou didn't know any better, he would say that Bakura was trying to comfort him.

-0-

"So," Yuugi says, as they exit Palace World and step into the late winter cold, "I was thinking you could come hang out tonight. Jou and Honda are coming over too. It'll be like a little high school reunion!"

Ryou smiles because Yuugi's own smile is contagious.

"I'm sorry, Yuugi-kun, but I'm meeting someone tonight," he says, "I wish I could though. Maybe next time?"

That's not a lie. He really does want to go; he never really sees anyone between his two jobs. But Bakura would never let him cancel an appointment.

"Oh," says Yuugi, gaining a slightly serious face, "Do you have a date?"

"No!" shouts Ryou, "It's nothing like a date! At all!"

Yuugi eyes him askance.

"Are you okay, Ryou?"

"I'm fine," Ryou says, hating the blush that was coming to his face, "See you tomorrow!"

-0-

"I would consider it a date," Bakura says, as he hands Ryou the weekly envelope.

Ryou freezes, "_What_?"

Bakura chuckles darkly.

Ryou stares and stares for the longest time. What was worse? Bakura actually making a joke (it was a joke!) or him listening in to conversation without Ryou even realizing?

-0-

He looks so young, in his family portrait. That's the only thing he really sees anymore. Not the happiness in his eyes, or the big smile on Amane's face. He can't really remember his mother's voice that well now, either. Sometimes the lullabies she would sing will stir in him, but now those are mostly gone too. The stories his father used to tell are nothing but forgotten dreams.

(Was it real? Were they ever really real?)

Ryou can only truly remember this night. The night they went out for dinner and came back dead. Car crash.

The phone rings and Ryou picks it up without looking away from the picture frame on the wall.

"Hey," Amane says, sounding exhausted.

"Hey," Ryou repeats.

"I know you don't want to talk," she says, "You don't have to say anything. I just need to know you're there."

A pause.

"I'm here. I'll always be here."

-0-

The graveyard sits below him. It looks almost peaceful when it's bathed in sunlight. Sirens screech and there is a voice, soft at first, but growing louder, saying –

"Get up!"

Ryou's eyes shoot open.

"Get up, _now_!" the voice hisses and groggily Ryou realizes it's Bakura talking.

His body automatically obeys and Ryou pushes himself off the bed, still only halfway awake.

"What's going on?" Ryou asks as Bakura frantically (that fills Ryou with fear, Bakura – frantic?) tears around the apartment.

"Where is the letter?" Bakura snaps.

"What?" Ryou says, rubbing his eyes.

Bakura grabs him by the collar and shoves him into the wall.

"Where. Is. The. Letter?" he snarls, so close to Ryou that their noses almost touch.

Ryou glares and struggles against his grasp, "It's in my pillow. Ah! Let go, you're hurting me!"

Bakura drops him without a second thought and tears the letter out from the pillow.

"Follow me," Bakura orders and leaves Ryou's bedroom.

Ryou's eyes widen and he quickly follows.

"Where are you going? What's going on?" Ryou asks as he runs after Bakura, who is already of the apartment and heading down the stairs.

Bakura slams into the door of the apartment complex and Ryou jumps the last flight of stairs to catch up.

It's still night outside, Ryou realizes. What in God's name is going on?

Bakura opens the door to a very expensive, very familiar black car. Ryou gasps. It's was Mrs. Saito, his landlord's car. Oh my…he was stealing his landlord's car!

"Get in," Bakura says between clenched teeth.

Ryou hesitates.

"Get in!" Bakura shouts.

Ryou's hands grasp the door handle and he pulls. He isn't even in the car all the way before Bakura presses on the gas.

-0-

He's never liked car rides, not since he turned thirteen. Ryou never particular cared for silence, either, but indulged in it out of necessity and not pleasure. And Ryou only liked Bakura on occasions; occasions that did not involved being ripped from his bed at two o'clock in the morning, if the car's clock was anything to go by.

Add all of that and the answer manifested itself in the worst twenty minute car ride of Ryou's life.

Bakura didn't say a word. Ryou quit asking after a while.

Finally the car came to a halt.

Ryou didn't even bother to ask where they were, he simply got out of the car so he could check for himself.

The cemetery. Graves everywhere, with willow trees placed sporadically among them.

"I hate the cemetery," Ryou whispers to himself.

The car makes a small ding sound. Ryou turns around to find Bakura at the trunk pulling something out.

A corpse falls to the ground.

Ryou's vision begins to get blurry.

"Wwwhat's…going…on?" Ryou stumbles over his own words.

Bakura looks up at him, as if he's just now noticed Ryou's there.

Suddenly, he lets out a laugh. It's a laugh unlike any of the ones Ryou has heard before it. Bakura's laughs were usually short and sardonic…but this…

This was loud and long and _unhinged_.

"Stop it!" Ryou shouts, "Stop _laughing_…and tell me what's going on!"

"I killed him," Bakura says, leisurely, as if he is savoring the words, "Against all logic, I took my knife and drained him of all his blood. I watched him bleed out…slowly…very slowly."

(Ryou gags.)

Bakura laughs again, "I'm sorry, Ryou. I forgot how _sensitive_ you are. How weak you are."

Ryou's fists clench.

"Why did you kill him?" he says with strength (_I'll show you who's weak_), "Why did you kill him?!"

"He found out," Bakura growls, all of his fake humor gone, along with the insanity, "He was going to kill you."

The wind (and his fake strength) is knocked right out of Ryou, "Me?"

"You," Bakura says softly.

Then he roars, "You! He wasn't after me! He didn't even know about me, he only wanted you!"

(Ryou trembles.)

"I should have let him kill you," Bakura sneers, disgusted.

His words cut through Ryou, wound him. (Ryou hadn't been aware that Bakura had that power over him.)

"Why didn't I let him kill you?" Bakura mutters, looking down at the body.

There is silence as they both stare at the corpse.

_Does he have a family?_ Ryou thinks._ A sister, a daughter – a son? Does he even have a name?!_

(_…Do I…do I deserve to be killed?_)

Something lands with a thud beside him. Ryou glances at it. A shovel.

"Start digging," Bakura says, "We need to be finished before sun rise. After all, we have a business to run."

"We?" Ryou asks, drowning in fear and guilt.

A cold smirk, "We."

-0-

They finish.

Ryou's not sure when, he lost grasp on time while digging the grave of a dead man, but they do finish before the sun is up.

"Should I walk home?" Ryou asks, numb, "I think my landlord will notice if I show up in her car."

Bakura leaning against a willow tree, "No. She'll notice if you show up in the middle of the night with mud on your pants, too."

Ryou turns his eyes to the ground. Hmm. All that digging and he hadn't even noticed that it was muddy grass. It must have rained, early. Spring is here, after all.

The words bubble up at the front of Ryou's mouth. He wants to ask Bakura what he should do now and more importantly he wants Bakura to tell him. Command him.

(For once he doesn't want to be the parent. He doesn't want to have to tell Amane don't eat this and go do that. He doesn't want the responsibility of taking care of his sister – taking care of himself. He just wants…)

"Come here."

Ryou obeys. He sits besides Bakura, not caring that the mud will stain his pants.

(What does he want?)

"So," Bakura says, his voice back to its normal cool arrogance, "What's your excuse?"

"Excuse?" Ryou asks, looking up at him.

"Your justification. The thing that gives you an excuse for the horrible thing you've just done. I know you, Ryou. You must have thought of something."

Ryou stares into the distance.

"My sister," he says finally, "I did this…do this for my sister. The money I get from this, I give to her so she can buy her books and pay for college. I've always done _everything_ for my sister! I work two jobs so I can give her extra money. I live in that horrid apartment because it's cheap. I didn't go to college so _she_ could go and not get in debt. I let her use all the money our parents left in their will so that she go to her expensive private school for all four years, when our parents only wanted two for each of us. And when our parents died, I grew up twice as fast so that _she_ wouldn't have too! There! That's my excuse."

Bakura looks down at him, "You're bitter."

Ryou pulls his knees to his chest.

"I'm bitter."

"Well then, Ryou," he purrs, "What's your real reason?"

Ryou closes his eyes.

"I'm sick of working," he whispers, "I'm sick of not doing things just for myself."

He lifts one eye open so he can look at Bakura's expression.

"Does that make sense?" he asks.

"Yes," Bakura says, "But that's not a very good reason."

"I know."

A stretch of silence.

"And you?" Ryou says softly, "Your excuse? Your reason?"

Bakura slides down the truck of the willow tree and sits beside Ryou. His face is twisted in a subtle sort of fury.

"You."

-0-

"Did you hear about the new Palace World they're building downtown, Ryou-kun?" Yuugi whispers as the polish the tables.

"Yes, Yuugi," Ryou sighs, "It's been on the bulletin board for weeks."

"No, I mean, do you know what happened to the workers?"

Ryou stops. His stomach quivers.

"No. What happened to the workers?"

"Well," Yuugi says and lowers his voice a little, "I heard from Honda – his cousin is a painter that PW's hired – that almost all the contractors of the new building are missing!"

Ryou starts polishing again, "You don't say."

"Yeah!" Yuugi nods, "But that's not the weirdest part! Some of the guys that were missing, three I think…they were found dead. All of them had their throats cut. It can't be coincidence, can it?"

"It does seem unlikely," Ryou admits (ignoring that feeling in his gut), "But we shouldn't gossip, should we?"

Yuugi is taken aback, but doesn't mention it for the rest of the night.

-0-

"Big brother!" Amane exclaims as she bursts into the apartment.

Ryou eyes widen, "Amane! But your flight–"

Amane frowns, "Hmpf. I was hoping you'd be asleep, like last time."

It dawns on Ryou.

"You purposely tell me the wrong flight times, don't you?"

Amane presses a kiss to her brother's check, "I like surprising you."

-0-

"It's you, isn't it?" Ryou accuses.

"Of course," Bakura says as he seals the envelope shut.

Ryou is sickened.

"Are you even _sorry_?" he asks, voice cracking.

Bakura snorts, "No. And neither are you. You just pretend that you are, because you know that's how you _should_ feel. But you don't actually feel it, do you Ryou?"

"I am sorry," Ryou says, as his fists clench.

"Wow. You're more of a liar than I am."

Ryou ignores the insult. He needs to find the reason…or the excuse…anything so that he can ignore this too.

"Why?"

Bakura points to the wads of money next to Ryou's couch and Amane's luggage.

"And–" Ryou asks, hoping, praying for something more.

"That's it."

"That's…it?" Ryou's voice wavers.

"Oh don't act so naïve," Bakura snaps, "You don't mind me killing people when it protects you. But when it gives you money suddenly you–"

Ryou cuts in, "That's different."

"It's not. You just want it to be."

That cold unambiguous truth shocks Ryou into silence.

"You can't keep doing this," Ryou whispers.

"I can," Bakura says, "and I will."

"Please," Ryou begs. (Begging, he's always begging…he hates that…needing something from someone so bad that he has to…)

Bakura eyes him coldly.

Reality was starting to sink in on Ryou.

(People were dying. Because of him. Because he was selfish. Because he was letting it happen.)

"I won't," Ryou says, fists shaking.

Bakura glares, "You won't _what_?"

Ryou steadies himself, "Let you. I won't let you keep killing people."

Bakura stares at him for a second with an arched brow, as if he expected Ryou to come out and say 'Just kidding!' and everything would return to _their_ normal.

Ryou does no such thing.

Finally, Bakura chuckles. Deep, low, devoid of humor.

"You won't _let me_? That's rich. You can't do anything. You can't take care of your sister – you can't even take care of yourself! And you plan on stopping me from doing something I wish to accomplish?"

Bakura's up on his feet now. He grabs Ryou by the wrist and pulls the boy to him.

"What are you going to do?" he sneers, "Kill me? You're pathetic. You couldn't even kill someone who was a threat to you – much less me! And you don't even want to. You're so see-through, Ryou. You only say these things as an act."

"I mean it," Ryou says, looking him in his eyes.

Bakura growls, "And if you did…you can't stop me. You can't do anything. You're entirely worthless."

He lets go of Ryou's wrist.

"I suggest you find a way to get rid of your sister, because I'll be here tomorrow."

Ryou watches him leave, unsure.

(Of what?)

-0-

"Are you okay Ryou?"

("Worthless. You're worthless.")

"Fine, Yuugi-kun."

"Ryou," Yuugi moans.

"I'm fine, Yuugi, honest."

"Your sister is in town, right?" asks Yuugi.

Ryou nods.

"You should take her down to the new Palace World. It opens tonight! I heard any PW employees get a discount too."

"Are you going?" Ryou inquires.

Yuugi shakes his head, "Can't. Honda's having his birthday party tonight."

Ryou looks up, a bit hurt.

"Normally I'd totally invite you along," Yuugi defends, "It's just that Jou planned it and…well…"

Yuugi blushes.

"It's at a strip club," he blurts out, "and I don't think you'd want Amane there."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Well," Ryou muses, "Maybe Palace World isn't such a bad idea."

-0-

"That's the worst idea ever," Amane says, crossing her arms.

Ryou sighs; Bakura will be here any minute.

"Come on Amane, don't you think that Hana–"

"Her name's Hikari."

"_Hikari_ would think it would be fun?"

"No. I think she would think it's stupid. Because it is," Amane huffs.

She's always been this disagreeable. Even when she was little.

"Really?" Ryou asks, "Because I called her about thirty minutes ago and she said she'd meet you there at seven and it's seven fifteen right now."

"You did what?!" Amane shouts, "You had no right! I'm an adult, Ryou! I can make decisions for myself."

"Of course you can," Ryou says, the words flying out of him, "You just don't make good ones."

Amane looks as if her she's been slapped across the face. Her green eyes have never been so wide.

"How dare you?!" she snarls.

Realization washes over Ryou, "Amane I'm sorry – you know I didn't mean –"

"Shut up!" she screams, stamping her foot. (God she's such a child, she's always gotten to be such a child.)

"I can't stand you sometimes!" she bellows, "You act so high and mighty all the time, Ryou. Like you're an unflinching moral compass! You're not perfect! You have no right to tell me what to do!"

Ryou retracts, "I only do what I think our parents would have wanted for you…"

"Well I have news for you, Ryou!" Amane sneers, "You're not our parents! No matter how hard you try to be! _You've never been my parent_!"

The door slams shut behind her.

-0-

"You heard."

It's not a question.

Bakura's grip tightens around Ryou in a sort-of embrace.

"Of course."

(The words sound more bitter than usual, but Ryou is so lost he just barely registers it.)

-0-

Amane doesn't come home the next night. Or ever.

A knock on his apartment door wakes Ryou up.

"Hello?" he says.

"Hello," says the police officer, "Are you Ryou Inoue? Brother of Amane Inoue?"

Ryou frowns, "Yes…what is this about?"

"It is with deep regret that I must inform you that…"

(Ryou doesn't hear much after that.)

-0-

It's a beautiful day for a beautiful funeral.

Amane always had a lot of friends; add on the freak nature and media sensation of her death (he could see the headlines when he closed his eyes, 'Terrorist Attack on Palace World?' – 'Death Toll 50 and Rising!') and it makes for a packed funeral.

And packed it is.

Ryou wonders how many of these people really knew her. How many of them really loved her.

(He wonders if he'd count.)

There was plenty of money for a nice casket too. Amane's friends were very wealthy and generous.

Of course they were. _Of course they were_.

Yuugi is there, holding his hand the entire time. (Ryou can't feel it.)

Bakura is there too. Ryou can't see him, but he knows he's there. He's _always_ there.

Ryou doesn't give her a eulogy. He hadn't stood up in front of everyone and given his parents a eulogy – so why break tradition now? (Besides! What would he say? She was funny and bright and childish and bratty and my reason for living and the one person I hated more than anyone? I'm glad she's dead! What will I do without her?)

He sobs, loud enough for Yuugi to hear him.

(What would he say? What should he say?)

The rest of the funeral is a daze. A bright, sun-filled daze. People come to him, offering him condolences, conspiracy theories, and fond memories of Amane.

He doesn't hear them. Not really.

She is lowered into the ground without a fuss. Ryou gives her roses, even though dandelions were her favorite. People expect him to give her roses, so he'll give her roses. It's not like she can tell. She's dead.

Her tombstone is shiny. A lot prettier than their parents'.

-0-

"Ryou," Yuugi says, his voice drenched in misery, "Ryou, everyone's gone. It's time to go."

He's on his knees. The muddy grass will stain his pants, just like it did the last time he buried someone.

"I did this, didn't I?" he says, clutching the dirt.

"What! No, Ryou! It's not your fault – that explosion was a freak accident – no one could have ever predicted something like that!" Yuugi assures him.

But he wasn't asking Yuugi.

"I made her go. She didn't want to go. I made her."

(_Because, no matter what she said, I'm her father and she will do what I tell her._)

"And?" Yuugi shouts (he's probably crying), "I gave you the idea in the first place! If anything it's my fault!"

Ryou hunches closer to the ground.

"It's mine. She's dead. Yuugi-kun…she's _really-_!"

Ryou breaks off into a loud sob-scream. He's alone; she's gone. She hated him! In the last moments of her life she hated him!

(Maybe she'd always hated him…)

Amane.

Ryou looks up.

There her name is, carved in stone, elegant and permanent.

It's wrong. That's wrong. That…shouldn't be.

His hands begin to move. The dirt is pushed to the wayside.

(He has to fix this. His always taken care of Amane and he can't stop now when everything is so wrong! It's his job and his duty and – )

The dirt is flying in every direction.

"Ryou!" Yuugi screams at the top his lungs, "Ryou! Ryou stop this! Oh God…stop!"

Ryou feels hands wrap around him trying to stop him.

(Why? Doesn't Yuugi understand? It's not right. He needs to go back. He needs to fix this. It's all his fault…)

_It's always been his fault!_

(…if he could just go back. He'd do it definitely! He gets it now! Right is right and wrong is wrong! And the moment he saw that money he should have ran. Ran far away and never looked back. Should have never taken a second glance at Bakura and his commands and…if he could do it over. He could fix this. It was too sudden and too cliché to end this way. If he could just _do it over again_. He just needs the chance. Just one chance!)

"Ryou please stop," Yuugi whispers, holding on tight, "Please, please stop."

"But it's all wrong, Yuugi-kun," Ryou mutters, "I have to fix it. I'm the only family she has left…"

Yuugi squeezes tighter.

"You can't fix it, Ryou. It's done."

Ryou trembles.

"Let her go."

-0-

"You knew," Ryou says, to the shadow on his wall, "You always knew."

The shadow emerges, eyes cold.

"_How could you_?" Ryou whispers – whimpers.

"You! It's always about you," Bakura sneers, "All the things I've done for you and you have the nerve to act as if I've caused you nothing but pain. And you've never done a thing for me in return! I saved you!"

"You damned me!" he exclaims, still not looking him the eyes, "And you did it on purpose."

"You let me. You wanted me too."

Ryou says nothing to that.

"Go away," Ryou says after a while, "I'm done. My family's dead. I think…I think I'm dead too. Just leave me alone."

Something flashes through Bakura's steel eyes. He grabs a hold of Ryou's arms and slams him into the wall.

"What is _wrong_ with you?" he shouts (Ryou's never seen Bakura this angry before), "I've been an orphan my whole life and I never – I don't understand you – You were happy! Remember? You were happy with doing as I told you to – _I_ was happy! How does this change anything? She said those things to you – you must think she deserved to die for that! You hated her! How can you mourn her like this? Don't lie to yourself – you hated her!"

"She was my sister and I loved her!" The words ripe from Ryou's throat with brutal honest. They're true. They're true.

(For a second it fills him with happiness, because he does, he does love her, until he realizes…)

They're true.

He loves her and she's gone.

Ryou feels the weakness coming on and tries desperately to hold back his tears. Bakura tightens his grip and lowers his voice.

Ryou rolls his eyes away from him. His family portrait is on the other wall. It's dusty…when this is all over he would have to clean…

"I won't let you continue on like this. We have other things to do," Bakura says. Commands.

"You won't let me?" Ryou asks.

"I won't."

Ryou could almost laugh.

"What are you going to do to stop me from caring about my sister? Kill me?" he sneers.

Bakura cringes and glares.

"You couldn't kill me, though, could you? Even if you wanted to. Maybe you do want to."

Ryou breaks out of his hold and stumbles towards his bedroom.

"It shouldn't matter, though. I'm worthless, remember?"

He shuts the door behind him.

"Worth_less_."

-0-

The phone rings. Ryou doesn't want to pick it up, but the answering machine does it for him.

"Hey, Ryou. It's me," Yuugi says, "I know you're there. You don't have to pick up if you don't want to. I just need to know you can hear me. I want you to know that I'm here, I've always been right here. If you need…when you need me, call me back. I'm not going anywhere."

-0-

He dreams that night. About the cemetery. Amane is dancing on her grave, while her father (her real father, not Ryou) scolds her. Her mother laughs.

Ryou watches from afar, clinging to a tree, with Bakura next to him whispering,

"Let's go."

The sirens awaken him. It's as if he knows they're for him.

Ryou jumps out of bed, adrenaline pumping, heart racing, knowing, just knowing that the cops are coming for him.

His body says to run. He should run.

(Shouldn't he?)

The door to his bedroom swings open. There Bakura is, trench coat billowing, drenched in blood. (Would Ryou have him any other way?)

"They'll be here in five minutes. We have to go."

Ryou looks at him with interest.

"We?"

"We."

The sirens wail louder, begging to be heard.

Bakura races to the other side of Ryou's bedroom and opens the window. The fire escape lies outside of it.

"Let's go."

It is Bakura, so it is not a request and it is not spoken gently. (It is not anything Ryou would have ever wanted or wished for…but somehow, his fate and his choices have led him up to this point…)

Bakura offers his hand.

There is blood on it and it could smear on Ryou's own if he dares to accept.

Acceptance.

Sins will always exist. Jealousy and bitterness will always exist. Love too.

His worth will always change.

The blood will smear.

(And maybe…maybe that's alright.)

Bakura's hand is warmer than Ryou thought it would be.

* * *

A/N I'm still not sure how this chapter happened. It was soooooo different in my head and then it turned out...like this.

Review, please!


	74. Fate & Fools

A/N Could be seen as a spiritual sequal to Savior, with Ryou interacting with people I don't normally write.

* * *

_Fate leads the willing and drags along the unwilling. ~ Seneca_

* * *

"You seem so certain, Kaiba-san."

_He won't be for long_, the spirit whispers into Ryou's head.

Ryou doesn't bother to ask him what he means by it, just as he didn't ask why the spirit wanted him to talk to Kaiba in the first place. No, he'd asked no questions (he's sick of knowing only to then be made helpless) and simply approached the other boy after school.

The hallways are empty now.

Kaiba leans back against the row of lockers, arms crossed. He radiates a different arrogance then the spirit, somehow less suffocating. (Then again, anything could be less suffocating then the spirit…)

The blue eyed boy scoffs.

"Of _course_ I am. Only fools believe in that. I make my own destiny."

(The spirit just laughs at that.)

Kaiba arches an eyebrow.

"Are you a fool, Bakura?"

The spirit smirks. Ryou can't see it, but he feels it.

(_Well, are you, landlord?_)

Ryou strokes the rings, feeling the pendants between his fingers. It burns a little bit, but he has come to almost enjoy the pain. (That would be considered foolish, wouldn't it?) Ryou knows more than he knew before – the spirit knows more than he knew before. And the spirit told him of his previous self, of their shared past. (Of his _promises_.)

Whether the spirit is lying or not the fact remains…

(He twirls the hanging pendants.)

Ryou laughs lightly.

"I suppose I am."

* * *

A/N Also, if there is a specific character you would like me to write with Ryou, feel free to ask me in the review.

So what are you waiting for? Go forth and review!


	75. Without Words

A/N So. Long time no see huh? Okay, here's my excuse: birthday party on Saturday pushed back my school work which pushed back my writing. And then this chapter refused to write itself easily and -sigh-. I'm sorry. I'll never update this late again.

AU. More tornshipping ship tease than you can shake a stick at.

* * *

_To us, family mean putting your arms around each other and being there. ~ Babara Bush_

* * *

Malik sighed. Life kind of sucked.

He passed the money to the cocky shop owner, glaring the whole time.

_Bastard_, he thought, _making profit off a demon invasion._ _If Bakura were here, he'd just rob you. Or kill you. Probably both._

The man smirked, revealing a gap in his teeth. He dangled the bullets ever so slightly out of Malik's reach.

"I think you should show better manners, kid. Bullets are a rare commodity these days and I gave you a great price."

Malik licked the front of his teeth. (If Ishizu had been here, she would have caught the warning sign and she would have gently tugged on his arm, calming him.)

The shop owner grinned wider, "Say please."

But Ishizu was dead. So…

Like a flash of lightning, Malik snatched the cartridge of bullets from his meaty hands. Before the shop owner could utter another word, Malik punched him in the face. He tumbled over and knocked over a rack of guns.

"Please," Malik said, with a small smile.

"You little punk!" the shop owner shouted, struggling to get up.

"I prefer brat, actually," Malik replied, thinking wistfully of Bakura's nickname for him. Maybe he'd pay the other boy a visit.

"See you around!" Malik called and strolled out of the store. He wasn't scared at all. Honestly – what was the worst that could happen? That gap-toothed bag of flesh would call the police? Ha. Malik was already one step ahead of him – he'd been on the run from the Domino Police for months now.

Malik rounded the corner of the street, the midday sun giving him an extra boost of happiness. (Which he really needed because of the whole 'his life sucked' thing.)

The Domino Police weren't even that big a deal. Bakura was on the run from the Domino Police for ten years _and_ the Pharaoh's guard for seven years.

Malik scowled. He was thinking of Bakura too much. He needed to get more friends. Or just friends, in general. But Malik wasn't the most friendly person and plus the whole demonic invasion, every-man-for-himself, blessed-bullets-are-like-gold type of world he lived in wasn't exactly helping his friendship crusade.

Friendship crusade. Yeah. He was totally going to knit Bakura a sweater with the words FRIENDSHIP CRUSADER on it for his birthday.

…

Did Bakura even _have_ a birthday?

Damn it all! He was doing it again.

That's it. No more thoughts about Bakura for the rest of the walk home.

In order to achieve this, Malik focused intently on his surroundings, analyzing every little detail. _Flowers wilting, bee nest hidden in someone's rundown apartment complex, some idiot walking around with no visible weapon, a kid with white hair running into the alley._

Wait – what?

Was that Bakura? It had to be. Who else would have white hair?

Before Malik had conscious knowledge about it, he ran across the deserted street and into the alleyway. Some part of him (okay, most of him) realized that this was about the biggest no-no when it came to Malik's Guide to Surviving and Kicking Demon Ass. Running into alleys with no idea why had to be at least number seventeen on the list.

Regardless, he was halfway to Bakura when he saw it. Them.

Malik had never seen so many demons in one place. And not the sissy 'I'm going to torture you for kicks' or 'I'm just here to tasty your delicious cinnamon flavored blood!' demons. Shadow demons. Malik had heard rumors about what they looked like, and he knew that was what these things had to be. Tall, humanoid (but so _wrong_), shaped things built out of billowing darkness. They had slits where eyes should be and they were a dark – darker than blood – red.

There had to be at least twenty of them. Maybe even thirty. Holy hell, what had Bakura gotten himself into?

The white haired boy swung his sword (_note to self: ask Bakura where he suddenly got that awesome sword from and why_) wildly at them, but the long gash that ran across his back prevented him for getting a good swing at them. Malik cringed. He'd never seen Bakura bleed before. The shadow demons stretched and engulfed each other, becoming one circle of darkness. Bakura, panting, lifted up his sword again to attack – when a tendril of darkness lashed out at him.

The shock of seeing shadows demons in the flesh worn off in an instant. Malik, with the ease that came from doing something for the last three years, loaded his gun and began to fire.

The bullets, of course, hit their target with ease. A bright white light burst from wherever the bullets hit. But unlike the demons Malik was used to, they didn't run or fight back. They just ignored him, continuing on with whatever it was they were doing.

What were they doing? Malik leaned in for a closer look. Bakura was slouched against the wall as a black wisp whipped at him. It made contact with his skin, shimmered a light blue for a second, and then struck him again, this time forcing its way into Bakura's mouth. (Malik had his 'What in the Nine Circles of Hell?' look on his face right about now.) The darkness retreated, pulling along a thin, fluttering, strand of light blue…_stuff_.

What the hell. What the **_hell_**.

"Are you…are you _eating_ his _soul_?!" Malik shouted at the demons, who finally acknowledged his presence.

So much for rule number seven in Malik's Guide – 'If a demon doesn't notice you, do everything in your power to keep it that way.'

A section of their giant black cloud (which didn't sound too scary when Malik phrased it like that, you know, ignoring the whole soul eating thing) broke off.

Malik licked his teeth and clenched his fist. If he was going to down, he was going to go down fighting. He fired all the bullets he had left in his gun, blowing a huge hole through the middle of the darkness chunk.

Something shiny glinted from the corner of his eye. Bakura's new random sword!

Malik dashed towards it, gripped it tightly, and then swung. He slashed widely, trying to keep them away from the already freakishly white boy who was only getting paler by the minute. But his eyes were still half way open, so he wasn't done yet. _They_ weren't done yet.

The shadow demons had pulled apart from each other into their separate forms, surrounding Malik. He just swung harder. The sword was nothing like his gun. It was heavy and brutal and when it hit the demons it didn't burn through the darkness like his bullets did, it _sliced_.

Soon there was only ten. Then five. Then none.

Malik collapsed to his knees, gasping for air. But he couldn't help but smirk.

_I just took out a whole herd of shadow demons_, he thought, _I'm awesome._

Before Malik could gloat more, the sword disintegrated in his hands. No, seriously. It faded away into a soft sky blue light, then vanished. That might have freaked him out, but he had more important things to worry about.

Malik turned his attention back to Bakura, who was unconscious and still slumped against the brick wall. Even though his muscles cursed his name, Malik wrapped his arms around Bakura's shoulders and hoisted him. He needed medical care like now, and the only place Malik knew of that would have the right medicine was Bakura's house. After all, if there was one thing that was consistent about Bakura, it was that he was always prepared.

-0-

Bakura was cute when he was unconscious.

Wow. That was a whole string of words Malik never thought he'd say.

But he was. Not in a cute crush kind of way – cute like a stray kitten who was sleeping. His face, instead of twisted into Bakura's normal sneer, was light and serene. Even his hair looked calmer.

As Malik dragged Bakura down the street, he realized he really should have brought his motorcycle with him. That would have made things so much easier. Oh well, at least Bakura didn't live too far away. Just a couple more streets…

Malik collapsed onto the front steps of Bakura's house with a groan. Not that you could really call it a house. Or front steps. It was really just granite wall. But Malik had the key. Bakura hadn't given it to him, of course, Malik had to steal it. Then a few days later Bakura would realize Malik stole it and then he'd make another one. That Malik would steal. Rinse. Lather. Repeat.

Grabbing the key from his pocket, he stuck into the dented rock. The wall gave a small hiss; it opened just a tiny crack. Just as Malik was pushing in, someone pushed him out.

"I thought I told you to stop coming by here, brat," said a cold, flat voice.

Malik took a step back, shaking. No. Freaking. Way.

Bakura (**_Bakura?!_**) took a step out of the shadows and into the daylight. His arms were crossed and he looked both bored and annoyed at the same time.

"What the h– how are y– but I just-!"

"You're rambling, Malik."

"Well _excuse_ me, I was too busy getting over the fact that you've suddenly gained the ability to be two different people at once!" Malik shouted, on the brink of hysterics.

Bakura arched a brow.

"What are you talking ab–" Bakura looked down by Malik's feet, "Oh."

"Yeah, '_oh'_!" Malik yelled, "Mind explaining to me why you aren't dead?!"

Bakura tapped the not-Bakura with his foot, and then let out a loud chuckle.

"You're such an idiot, Malik."

"W-what?" Malik sputtered, "How dare you! I just saved your life you ungrateful bast-!"

"Correction," Bakura interrupted, "You saved _his_ life."

Both of them turned to stare at the white haired boy lying on the ground, who let out a small moan.

"I can't believe he's still alive," Malik whispered and then he remembered his fury.

"I can't believe I just risked my life for some random stranger!" he screamed, along with some other choice words. Malik yanked the boy by his stupid lying white hair, pushed back Bakura, and dragged the not-Bakura into Bakura's house.

"Just _what_ do you think you're doing?" Bakura asked, shutting the wall door behind them.

Malik began to rummage through Bakura's crates of random crap. Bakura was an excellent thief after all; his house was full of meaningless (at least to Malik) objects, medicine, knives, and ammunition.

"I'm finding something to heal his wound."

"Why?" Bakura scoffed, looking at the pathetic boy collapsed on the floor.

"Because I just fought off like six billion shadow demons and I'll be damned if I let my investment go to waste!"

Bakura's eyes narrowed.

"Shadow demons?"

"Yup," said Malik, tossing items aside, "Okay so maybe there weren't six billion, more like thirty but then they all became this big wall of black inky stuff and then they like sucked out that kid's soul or something. It was weird."

"Shadow demons don't eat souls," Bakura patronized, "They don't eat at all. They harvest energy."

"Well I guess he must have a lot of energy because they were treating him like an all-you-can-eat buffet."

Bakura glowered, "Don't be stupid. You know humans don't have energy sources. Only–"

"Only demons and angels blah blah blah, yeah, yeah. I've heard it all before."

"And yet your ignorance never ceases to amaze me."

"I don't need to know anything about demons," Malik hissed, "All I need is my gun and plenty of bullets."

Bakura rolled his eyes and stepped towards Malik to help find the proper medical supplies.

"Why are you helping me?" Malik asked, eyeing Bakura askance.

"The faster you get the stuff you need, the faster you and your new friend get out of my house."

Malik was about to retort when the mysterious sword-swinging, not-Bakura stirred. He opened up his eyes, a deep brown. Not quite the same color as Bakura's (not enough red) but close enough. He rubbed his head and then looked away. Something seemed to click inside of him because all of sudden the boy was frantic. He kept clutching his throat and tried to reach his back, all the while looking for something.

"Hey!" Malik said, "Who are you? What's your name?"

The boy ignored him, becoming more and more panicked as he continued to search for…whatever it was that he was searching for.

"Hey!" Malik shouted again, "I asked you a question!"

The boy would not listen to him.

Bakura let out a growl, "Enough of this."

The thief grabbed the other boy by his collar and shoved him into the wall.

"Calm down," Bakura whispered icily.

"Smooth," Malik muttered under his breath and walked towards the two.

The boy did stop panicking though, instead, he glared down at Bakura. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but then closed it immediately.

"I guess this would be the perfect time to ask you your name," Malik sneered.

The boy titled his head at Malik, then flashed him a huge smile. He opened his mouth and it moved…but no sound came out.

Bakura loosened his grip on the boy.

"Can you speak?" he asked.

The boy shook his head, white bangs covering his eyes.

Bakura dropped the boy completely and walked off to a corner of the room. When he came back, he had a marker and a pad of paper in his hand.

"Isn't there anything you _don't_ have?" Malik asked, incredulous.

The white haired boy in question shot him one of his signature 'Shut up, Malik' glares. Bakura thrust the marker and pad of paper into the boy's hands.

"Write," he ordered.

Eagerly, the boy scribbled down on the pad. A few seconds later, he ripped it off and gave the note to Malik, much to Bakura's annoyance.

It said:

**Thank you for saving me. My name is Ryou. **

Malik smirked. Finally, someone was grateful for his amazing act of heroicness earlier today.

"You're welcome, Ryou," Malik said, trying out his name, "I'm Malik. And your twin over there is Bakura."

'Bakura, Malik' Ryou mouthed, though no sound came out.

Ryou went back to his pad.

**I can't remember all of what just happened. Can you tell me? Do you know where my sword is?**

Oh, so that's what he was looking for.

"Okay," said Malik, starting his story, "I saw you running away from something and I thought that you were him so I took off after you. There were like thirty shadow demons you were fighting, but they formed this big shadow demon blob and cornered you. They started like sucking out this blue thing from your mouth–"

Ryou gasped. Or at least his face did, because no actually sound came out. He scribbled on the pad.

**My voice – They took my voice!**

Malik blinked and turned to Bakura, "They can do that?"

"Finish the story," Bakura responded.

"Right. So they sucked this blue thing out of your mouth and then I started to shoot them. Then I grabbed your sword and killed all of them. It was probably the most amazing thing ever. Anyway, as soon as they disappeared, your sword kind of did too. I didn't do anything too it, it just…poofed! Vanished."

Ryou pulled his knees close to his chest. The poor kid looked like he was going to cry.

Malik felt a bitter tang welling up in his mouth. He was overcome with this bizarre urge to…to apologize.

"Hey," Malik said, gently tapping him on the shoulder, "We can get you a new sword. Bakura has tons of knives and crap lying around - don't you Bakura?"

Bakura scoffed. "He's your charity project, not mine."

Both Ryou and Malik glared, though Ryou's was a little more heartbroken. He took the marker to the paper yet again.

**I'm not a charity project! I'm a - **But that sentence was crossed out as soon as Ryou wrote it.

**No. You're right. I should go. Thank you again for my life, Malik.**

Ryou placed the pad down and struggled to get up.

Malik read the note eagerly as Ryou collapsed back to his knees.

Bakura rolled his eyes.

"Obviously, you're not going anywhere until you're healed," he said, "Stay there while I find you some medicine."

"So," Malik said, sitting down beside Ryou, "What happened to your back?"

**Terra-shadow attack. **

Malik stared at the paper.

"What's a terra-shadow?" he spat out.

From the other side of the room, Bakura called, "One of the elementals – an earth demon. Not that hard to figure out, Malik."

Malik grimaced and turned to Ryou, "Then why didn't you just call it an earth demon?"

Ryou frowned.

**Because that's the proper terminology. They're not demons – they're shadows, borne from the magic and hate of this world. Calling them demons or elementals – the Pharaoh's Guard angels – is just slang. Detrimental slang at that! Demons implies something from another world, but they come from us – **

Malik snatched the marker out of Ryou's speeding hand.

"I get enough history lessons from Bakura, okay?" he said to the pouting Ryou, "Geez, you two don't just look like each other, you act like each other."

Speak of the devil. Bakura waltzed over towards them, handing a small vile of clearish yellow liquid to Ryou.

"Drink it," he ordered.

Ryou stared at it for a long time before reaching for the glass. He downed it in one gulp.

Malik pressed his lips together, "Why do you look like Bakura anyway?"

Ryou did his head tilt thing again. Then, he picked up the marker.

**Coincidence?**

Both Bakura and Malik snorted at that.

Ryou huffed a little bit and returned to his pad.

**I don't think we look that much alike.**

Malik laughed in a short burst, "Now I know you're delusional, because you're Bakura's spitting image. Right, Bakura?"

"Shut up!" Bakura snapped, moving closer to the wall.

"What's your deal?" Malik said back, recoiling.

Ryou's posture tensed.

"You heard it," Bakura said, stepping closer.

Ryou nodded rapidly and clawed at the wall until he stood up. His mouth opened, but then his cheeks flushed pink and he quickly shut it.

"Heard what!" Malik said, sulking, "What are you guys talking about?"

Bakura was just about to tell Malik to shut up when a blast of black energy ripped through the house. It sent Bakura and Malik flying to the wall on one side, Ryou to the other.

Malik, shaking, stood up. The darkness pulled rocks from the walls and ground. They swirled and spun with the darkness, until the darkness was coated in it. The demons had no face, but Malik knew that it wasn't him they were looking at.

Ryou took a step back before his eyes hardened in determination.

The demons let out a terrible screeching noise and in a blur of brown and mud lashed towards Ryou.

Something flared inside of Malik.

"Get away from him!" Malik snarled, running full speed towards the trio of earth demons.

Behind him, Bakura swore and began to run too.

By the time Malik reached one of them, he realized that his gun was out of bullets, so he did the only sane thing there was to do. He threw the gun at them. It hit the rock coating with a small thunk and then ricocheted from the demon to floor.

"Hey! I just wasted about fifty dollars worth of bullets on that kid – if you want him you'll have to go through me first!"

The three demons shifted ever so slightly, though Malik still couldn't really tell if they were looking at him or not. Because of the whole lack of faces thing.

One demon stepped forward and the other two walked closer to Ryou.

Before Malik could give the other two a piece of his mind, the demon closest to him raised his rock covered arm. It grew longer and slimed down, casting away useless rock until it was nothing but a solid, stone whip.

Oh sh–

The whip lashed towards Malik, who just barely dodged in time. The demon pulled the arm like whip thingy back–

Malik stared, eyes wide opened, as a white light pierced through the demon's round midsection. The soil and rock around it gurgled and then exploded with a hiss.

Bakura, knife in hand, glared.

"Get out of my house."

Malik gazed at him for a few moments longer, until a small smile broke across his face.

"Got a spare?" Malik asked, with a thankful smirk.

Bakura indeed had a spare and tossed it to him. Malik twirled the thing in his hands. Plain black handle, and the blade could have been sharper and longer, but beggars can't be choosers…

"Let's go!" Malik said and rushed towards Ryou.

The remaining two demons had formed a tight circle around him. (_What is it with demons and creepy circles? _Malik thought bitterly.) Rocks were flying between the gaps of the circle, and both demons were moving closer and closer at a steady rate.

Holy crap. This kid was like demon cat-nip or something.

"Hey! We're over here!"

The demons sent a few rocks flying their way, but for the most part continued their focus on Ryou. The mute boy still had that look of steely determination in his eyes. His lips were moving so fast, Malik couldn't even begin to make out what words he was trying to say.

Well he couldn't just stand here and wait!

"I _said_ 'We're over here'!" Malik yelled, chucking the nearest item of junk that was visible. The demon hit screeched and then seconds later three smaller versions of the rock monster formed around both him and Bakura.

"Nice going," Bakura glared.

"Just shut up and fight!"

The demons pounced, showering rocks and mud at them. Malik dodged, and stabbed one in the middle of its body. The entry wound glowed white and the demon stopped attacking long enough for Bakura to take his knife and slice it in half. The rocks it used for its form dropped to the ground with a loud thud.

Victory was short lived.

They'd attracted the other, bigger demon's attention, which was good because that's what Malik had been aiming for the whole time. It lumbered closer, each footstep of rock booming louder.

Why had he wanted this again?

Malik turned his gaze to the white haired boy, struggling to stand in the corner. His lips were still moving.

_Stupid kid_, Malik thought, _you are going to owe me your life by the end of this._

Out of the corner of his eye, Malik saw that Bakura was staring at him too. He looked pissed, for sure, but he also looked – suspicious, confused? – damn, he could never tell. Bakura's scowl always looked the same.

To the right of him, Malik heard a swirling sound. And that's when he remembered he was still fighting demons.

"Move!" Bakura snarled and pulled Malik by the sleeve of his shirt. They both fell to the floor as the three demons morphed into one very wide, very dripping, mud-covered rock demon.

Both Malik and Bakura swore and charged.

It hissed at them and shot its contents of dirt, mud and _whatever_ at them, not even really aiming, just firing. Malik knew that it knew that they could only dodge for so long. Eventually it would hit them.

Malik swore. Keeping them at a distance was to that thing's advantage too. They couldn't kill it with their knives if they weren't closer to it.

The demon launched a particularly large rock at Malik, breaking up Malik's thought.

"Bakura–!" Malik called out, but before he could finish the demon wailed – screeched – _screamed_ – in agony. He'd never heard anything like that before. Like the demon was being torn apart from the inside out.

A wooden chair broke over its head.

The demon's rock sizzled and folded into itself, collapsing into a black gooey mess.

Ryou was standing (shaking, but determined) behind it.

Malik looked down in horror. The hell? Since when do chairs take down demons? Since when do they _melt_? Could this day get any weirder?

Bakura looked at the black pool with disgust, as well. The black pool of mush was…_bubbling_.

Oh god–

Malik felt his face turn green.

Bakura glowered at Ryou, "Just how exactly did you do that?"

Ryou's eyes widened and it even looked like was blushing for a minute, but then he settled back into a defiant glare. He didn't make a move to his pad.

Bakura growled and before Malik knew it, he pounced on Ryou. The smaller boy quickly fell to the ground and then Bakura reached up his shirt –

…_what_?

"Bakura!" Malik shouted, wrapping his arms around the other boy's waist and trying to pry him off, "What the hell are you doing?"

Bakura, with ease, kicked Malik in the stomach and shoved him away. After a few more seconds of fondling (or man-handling or whatever the hell Bakura was doing to that poor kid) he shoved Ryou to the ground. Brushing himself off, he stood up.

"Heh. So you really are human."

Ryou glared. (The expression didn't look quite right on his innocent face.) He wrote down a few words that filled up a whole page of his pad.

**You're a jerk.**

"You're a _bastard_," Malik corrected for him, helping Ryou off his feet.

Bakura rolled his eyes, "Call me whatever you like. It's natural for those demons to be so interested in a normal human – I had to be sure he was one."

"Then why didn't you just ask him?" Malik exclaimed, exasperated.

"He could have lied."

"Yeah, because obviously this is the face of pure treachery and deceit," Malik sighed, pointing to Ryou's wide eyes and partial pouting lips.

"You don't know anything, Malik," Bakura sneered, "Angels aren't allowed to if they're angels. It's against their code."

Malik's rage finally bubbled over, "How do you know everything!?"

Suddenly the black goo made a soft hiss. Ryou eyes widened and he hastily scribbled down a note.

**They're reforming. We have to leave now.**

The now was underlined.

Bakura looked like he might strangle Ryou, but then he just snorted. He turned around, surveying the damage to his house. Finally, his gaze landed on Malik.

"I don't think I've ever actually seen your house, Malik. Seeing as how you got mine _trashed_, I do believe you owe me."

Malik was just about to insult him when Ryou tugged on his arm. His face was frowning, eyes big and urging.

Malik swore and turned around.

"Fine. Fine!" he shouted, "I guess it's just Slumber Party at Malik's tonight!"

-0-

"Here it is," Malik grumbled, motioning to the house. It was medium sized, bigger than the apartments in the city like where Bakura lived. But not as big as the mansions in downtown Domino by Kaiba Corp. and the Pharaoh's 'palace'. The white paint was chipped, weeds were overgrown in the front yard and for the most part, it looked like no one had lived there in years.

The walk hadn't taken as long as Malik had originally thought it would, considering he lived half way across town. It hadn't been a pleasant walk, though. Way too silent. Bakura never talked because he was, well, Bakura and Ryou couldn't even talk if he wanted to. Occasionally he would write a note or two, but mostly he just looked up to the sky. He didn't seem to ever notice the daggers Bakura would glare at him.

Malik sighed. He really didn't want them to be at his house.

"Hmmph, "Bakura smirked, "I was expecting something better."

"You ungrateful bast-!"

Ryou tugged on his shirt. The kid seemed to do that a lot.

"What?" Malik snapped.

Ryou handed him a note.

**Do you live alone?**

"Of course," Malik snapped bitterly, "Who am I going to live with – _him_?"

Ryou blinked. Then he wrote.

**Aren't you two close? You saved me because you thought I was him.**

"We are not close!" Malik said, flustered.

Bakura eyed him with a mix of annoyance and amusement. Malik hated that look.

"I hate you," he said.

"Obviously. That's why you risked your life for someone who bears only a passing resemblance to me," Bakura said, smirking.

"_Passing resemblance_?! What planet are you two living on?"

Then, Bakura's words sunk in.

"And I didn't do it for you!" he growled.

Ryou and Bakura both gave him 'Oh, really?' looks.

Bakura crossed his arms, "Then why did you do it?"

Malik was taken aback.

"Because I…" Malik struggled for an excuse, "I'm…I'm a decent person! And I wanted to save him! And stuff."

Wow. Even _he_ didn't believe that.

Bakura laughed out loud and walked to the door.

Ryou gave Malik a little pat on his shoulder. Malik glared – why was this kid so touchy-feely? He offered Malik a note.

**It's okay. You kind of remind me of a friend of mine. **

Malik stared at the note for a long time. It hadn't really occurred to him that this boy had friends. Or a life, or a back-story at all. He just sort of fell from the sky, but obviously he had to come from somewhere.

"Are you two coming or not?" Bakura said, "You do realize that they'll be coming back."

Ryou's sympathetic look turned solemn.

"What!" Malik exclaimed, "How do you know?"

Bakura sighed, "Just when I think you can't get any more stupid… They marked their scent all over us."

Malik's face contorted in disgust at the thought of them marking him. He ran up to the door where Bakura was.

"Why didn't you tell me this sooner?" he asked.

"I assumed you knew. Anyone with half a brain would know, Malik. Besides, it doesn't matter as much when we're travelling. It's only once we've settled that they can be attracted to the scent."

Malik stared at him, both his hands clenched into fists.

"Are you going to stand there gaping at me or are you going to let us in so that we can take showers and delay their return for a day or two?" Bakura asked, a small smirk on his lips.

Malik, muttering darkly under his breath, opened the door.

The place was a mess. There was one bed in the middle of the living room, with a stained mattress and sheets, and apart from that there was no furniture. Cobwebs hung in every corner, and the hardwood floor was covered in a coating of dirt.

Ishizu had always done most of the cleaning…

"Nice place," Bakura said, "Do you even have a shower?"

"Of course I have a shower!" Malik scoffed, "It's down the hall to your right."

Bakura walked off without another word. When Malik turned around, Ryou was already plopped down on his bed. He gave Malik a small smile.

Before he realized it, Malik was sitting down next to him.

"So," Malik said as nonchalantly as possible, "How exactly did you wind up here?"

Ryou blanched. His marker began to move.

**It's a long story.**

"Bakura seems like the type who takes long showers."

Ryou sighed, though no sound came out.

**I don't really want to tell you.**

Malik was slightly hurt for a second before his eyes settled into a glare.

"Well I saved your life so I think you owe me."

Ryou shifted his position uncomfortably, but then began to write.

**I was…well, I was sneaking away from home when it happened. A bunch of terra-shadows corned me in the alley and started attacking me. I fought them off, but one of them…**

Ryou's marker trembled.

…**injured my back. I got away…I was trying to get home! But they attacked again and drove me deeper into the city. Then, they just disappeared when the shadows came…I ran for miles before they finally attacked me in that alley. Then I met you.**

Malik reread the words again, trying to detect the subtext. Finally, he replied.

"Well, that sucks."

Ryou nodded his head in agreement and leaned against the wall. There was a small silence between them before Malik felt a slight tug on his shirt.

Ryou had a note to give him.

**Who's that?**

The white haired boy pointed to a small picture wedged between the floorboards. Damn! He thought he'd gotten rid of all the pictures of Ishizu.

"My sister," Malik said gruffly, turning away. He didn't want to talk about this. The last thing he wanted was sympathy.

Another soft tug on his shirt. Like a child.

"What!" Malik snapped, "I'm not going to tell you about her or what happened so don't even ask!"

Ryou recoiled a bit, but still had the small piece of paper in his hand. Malik snatched it from him with a snarl.

**I had a sister, too.**

Malik gasped slightly, startled by the words. They were so soft, just like Ryou's hair, or his little smile that seemed more like a secret than an expression, or the tender look in Ryou's eyes…

And Ryou offered Malik that secret smile again, just like he'd offered him that note.

Malik leaned in closer to him, to get a better look and…

"Am I interrupting something?" came a dark voice, with the God-awful mix of annoyance and amusement. Smug.

Ryou's smile faded into a harsh pout, which Malik assumed was him trying to glare. Mentally cringing (if that's what Bakura's voice sounded like then what would he look like?), Malik turned around.

Bakura was standing there, arms crossed, leaning against the door way with that damned smirk of his plastered over his face. His normally spiked and puffy hair was flatter, being dripping wet and all. The towel around his shoulders really didn't do anything. The water trickled from his hair down his throat and then down to his chest – his bare chest –

...

"Put a shirt on!" Malik barked, feeling enraged like he always did when Bakura was around.

Bakura ignored him.

"You," he said, looking at Ryou.

"His name's Ryou," Malik said.

Again, Bakura ignored him but Ryou at least flashed him a small smile and his lips said 'Thank you'.

"You never did tell us why those demons are after you."

Something flashed through Ryou's eyes. Slowly he turned to his paper.

**I don't know.**

Bakura stalked closer. (Malik suddenly had another urge to yell at him and tell him to put on a God forsaken shirt already.)

"Liar," he said, "Whatever secrets you're hiding – for yourself or whoever – are meaningless now. You got me and Malik marked, and we saved your miserable life on two separate occasions. Which means your loyalties lie with us now, _Ryou_."

Out of the corner of his eye, Malik thought he saw Ryou shiver.

"The truth. Now."

Ryou hunched over in defeat and picked up his marker yet again.

**Fine. My friends –**

Ryou scratched that out.

**My family are part of Atemu's guard, fifth level Archs. The demons probably smell them on me and that's why they're hunting me down. If you could take me to the palace, they'd probably know what to do. They could help.**

"The palace?" Malik asked, "You mean like the _Pharaoh's_ palace?"

Ryou scrunched up his face. It was kind of cute.

**He's not a Pharaoh. That's just slang.**

Good God, this kid and his technicalities.

"And slang is bad," Malik said, sighing.

**Slang is bad.**

Bakura said nothing, just stared at Ryou for a long time. Finally, his gaze fell to the blonde.

"Take a shower, Malik."

"Don't tell me what to do!" Malik shouted (he was still mad because Bakura still did not have a shirt on), "This is my house."

"Go," Bakura said again.

Malik cursed but turned away regardless. A shower could actually be just what he needed right about now.

-0-

Bakura was going to get this little boy to crack if it was the last thing he ever did.

It was painfully obvious that the boy was lying; he was fidgeting all over the place and refused to look Bakura in his eyes. That story he'd fed to Malik and himself was half-truth at best. Bakura knew the Pharaoh (his fists clenched just thinking about their last encounter), he didn't associate with humans.

Humans. Malik was human. Bratty, jaded and with exceptionally good aim, but still human. This _boy_ was not. He was too accustomed to demons and their ways, he was too quiet, and he was too kind.

Bakura suppressed a growl. So what the hell was he?

He had felt his back. There were no wings. But what kind of human would survive multiple demon attacks and then have their voice sucked out?

He was a mystery. And Bakura hated mysteries.

A small ripping sound caught Bakura's attention. The boy pulled off the sheet of paper and offered it to Bakura – a reserved sort of a hopeful expression on his face.

Bakura scoffed. "If I wanted to hear something from you, I would have asked."

The boy's wide eyes trembled a bit, but his face remained the same. So he was trying to control his emotions.

Another note was presented. Persistent little kid.

Bakura instead pretended to be unfazed and shook his wet hair. The boy's face flushed a light red. And then he glared.

He scribbled down another note but instead of handing it to Bakura with an unsteady gaze, the boy balled it up and then chucked it at Bakura's face.

Bakura, snarling, unravelled the note.

**Stop ignoring me!**

Before Bakura could give an adequate response, another note fell next to his feet.

**Please.**

Bakura looked up to find the boy's expression had changed. His eyes were wider and he was rubbing his arm, looking away. Was he scared?

"What?" Bakura said, giving in. Maybe if he talked to this kid for a second he would stop bothering him so he could figure this whole mess out.

The boy took his marker and wrote. Bakura was beginning to regret ever giving that thing to him in first place.

**Why do you hate me so much? You didn't have to save me from those shadows.**

"I hate everyone. What makes you so special?"

**You don't hate Malik.**

Bakura growled. He added 'observant' to his growing list of reasons to hate this kid.

There was a pause between them. Finally, Ryou wrote again.

**How do you know so much about shadows?**

"I could ask you the same question."

Ryou's marker momentarily dropped from his hand and Bakura seized the chance. He pulled Ryou by the wrist and shoved him into the bed.

"Just now – you were still lying, I could tell," he whispered.

The boy opened his mouth to protest, but then quickly shut it when he realized that no words would come out. So he simply shook his head violently, brown eyes far too wide for his face.

Bakura, for what felt like the five hundredth time that day, rolled his eyes.

"You were," and then Bakura added, "You're not human."

Like a match being lit, something sparked in Ryou's eyes. Genuine anger. He kicked Bakura in the chest – harder than Bakura would have expected from someone so weak – and then for extra measure pushed Bakura to the edge of the bed.

Ryou, blushing and glaring furiously, reached for his pad and shortly after shoved a note in Bakura's face.

**I am human.**

The words were written so hard that the ink had stained the sheets.

Bakura barely glanced at the note, instead focused on the boy's eyes. They were narrowed in his glare, but also…it looked like he was holding back tears. Or holding back some sort of emotion.

"What are you hiding?" he asked, softly. He hadn't meant to say that out loud.

Ryou blinked and then retreated back into a slumping position. He picked up the marker, ran his fingers across it, and then sighed soundlessly. Words soon flowed from his hands.

**I wasn't always though…**

The words were barely legible he was shaking so much.

**I mean I – **

Ryou crossed it out and started over.

**I shouldn't be telling you this – **

Crossed out yet again.

**It's just that I'm – **

Bakura grabbed onto to his trembling hand.

"Relax," he said. The boy stiffened for a second and then reached for the marker one last time.

**I was a guardian but my wings were ripped off.**

Impossible. Wings couldn't be pulled off without some sort of heavy machinery and then for sure it would have killed the body attached to them. And if by some miracle he'd survived that, there would have been a mark left – and then he would have died from the sudden lack of energy.

"You should be dead," Bakura said bluntly, running a hand through his hair.

**But I'm not.**

The look in his eyes was almost regretful.

Above all else, Bakura hated that boy for his eyes.

Before anything else was said, a small sizzling sound was heard. Both Bakura and Ryou tensed automatically. They knew that sound. Their eyes met and, though no words were said, they spoke to each other.

_Malik_.

Within seconds they both launched themselves from the bed.

"Keep that marker and pen with you," Bakura ordered as he put on his shirt and readied his knives, "It's the only way we can talk."

Ryou nodded and put them in the pocket of his torn up and bloodied sweater.

Bakura took two gliding steps into the hallway and broke open the door to the bathroom.

"What the hell!" Malik shouted as he wiggled his shirt over his head, "I was getting dressed you–"

"No time, Malik," Bakura hissed, pulling on his arm and dragging him out of the bathroom. The sizzling sound grew louder in Bakura's ears.

Ryou came rushing towards them. Not bothering with the pad of paper he wrote on Malik's shirt. **Ignis - Fire. Outside. 134.**

"Where?" Bakura asked.

Malik's face went blank when he read the 134.

Ryou again took hold of Malik's shirt.

**Surrounded**.

Another whistle-type sound buzzed through Bakura's ears.

Damn.

"Where's your motorcycle?" Bakura said, turning to Malik.

Malik ignored him.

"One hun-hundred and thirty four demons outside," he stuttered, taking hold of Ryou's hand, "How is that even possible? How can you even know that?"

"Malik!"

"Shut up Bakura, I'm having a meltdown!"

The windows burst open and the heat of the flames outside was finally felt.

That snapped Malik out of it. He started racing to the end of the hallway.

"Back porch!" he called as Bakura and Ryou ran after him.

They couldn't fight off all of them, not in the state they were in right now. That motorcycle was their only chance of survival.

Malik kicked down the back door as Bakura felt cold hands press against his chest. Ryou looked up at him, and then tore the knife straight out of his shirt.

A small earth demon, about half Ryou's size, emerged from the wall and leapt out at him. With no hesitation (for once the kid was standing up straight) Ryou stabbed it, creating a large white hole, and then sliced the demon all the way through.

Bakura stood in wonder.

Ryou looked unfazed and offered the knife back to him with a slightly guilty look on his face.

"Keep it," Bakura said as they stepped out into the fading sun.

"Hey!" Malik yelled, revving up the motorcycle, "Are you guys coming or not?"

Ryou squirmed at the sight of the cherry red bike. Bakura sneered. So he could stab a demon without a second thought, but he was scared of a _motorcycle_? Unbelievable. This kid really needed to get his priorities straight.

Without so much as a syllable, Bakura lifted Ryou off the ground and threw him onto the motorcycle. He squished Ryou up against Malik so there was no way he could fall off.

A deep roaring sound boomed past them as all the rocks from the house were sucked away, slowly forming into demons.

"Drive!"

"You don't have to tell me twice!"

In an instant, the world went from solid shapes and figures to nothing but colors and stripes. Everything flew past them, even the heat of the fire demons. Bakura wasn't worried, though. Fire demons were notoriously slow.

The rumbling and chaos of Malik's now destroyed house faded into the distance. They were in silence for an uncountable amount of time. No noise but the engine and each other's breathing.

Finally, Malik turned his head back towards Bakura.

"I'm almost scared to ask," Malik muttered, "But where are we going?"

Bakura looked down at Ryou. The boy's lower lip quivered a bit, but then he stopped and steadied himself. He gave Bakura a curt nod.

"Downtown Domino. I think we owe a certain Pharaoh a visit."

-0-

_Ryou_ _may look like a walking marshmallo_w, Malik mused, _but God_ _if he doesn't have grip._

Since they first propelled themselves away from Malik's house (which, he was trying very hard not to remember, was destroyed), Ryou hadn't loosened his grip. Not once.

He had asked the kid if he was alright an hour back, but he had just nodded and returned to squeezing onto Malik's waist for dear life.

Bakura hadn't said a word, other than the occasional command or snide comment. But this was Bakura he was talking about after all, that wasn't really a new development.

But still. Some conversation would have been nice. Downtown Domino was so creepy now. The buildings loomed down at him, threatening to engulf him, and the faint smell of burning incense always seemed to linger.

It looked nothing like it had when Malik was a child. It had been so alive back then, cars always in traffic jams, and you never had elbow-room when you walked.

But now the streets he'd driven down so many times were deserted and it was just…wrong.

A tug on Malik's shirt brought him out of his thoughts.

Ryou was pointing at a street on the left.

"Do you want me to turn?" Malik asked.

Ryou nodded.

Malik turned and with a faint smirk he realized Ryou was holding on to his waist again. Then he saw the building.

It wasn't that impressive, when he really thought about it. Domino had plenty of skyscrapers, and this one wasn't even the tallest. Kaiba Corp. was. And just because it had a lot of windows didn't make it prettier either. The only thing worthwhile about the building was the faint white glow around it. It was subtle at first, but the closer Malik looked the brighter it became.

Yeah. Glowing buildings.

What had his life come to?

He didn't like the Pharaoh. Not that he disliked him personally, he didn't know the guy. He hated him and his stupid company. The angels he employed or whatever. It didn't seem right that he built a business out of justice and protecting people. Those things should be for free.

But at this point in time Malik had been through several near death experiences and he honestly didn't care anymore.

The motorcycle stopped and before Malik could take the keys out of the ignition, Ryou was racing to the door of the building.

"Ryou!" Malik called, dashing after him, "Ryou – wait!"

Bakura didn't bother to run after them.

Ryou burst into the office building, with a panting Malik close behind.

For being the main office of a building that could glow, it was pretty lacklustre. There was a girl with light brown skin and dark brown hair typing away at the computer in the corner of the office. A couple of black couches in the middle of the room served as a waiting area, complete with a table of magazines. Thankfully, no one was inside but them and the receptionist. Malik really wasn't in the mood for other people.

Malik looked at Ryou, who to his shock, looked like he was going to cry. As Bakura sauntered in, Ryou ran up to the receptionist's curved desk.

The girl didn't look up from her computer but smiled anyway.

"Good evening! My name's Mana," the girl pointed to her name tag, (which indeed did say 'Mana'), "If you have an appointment, please tell me your name and scheduled time. If you'd like to make an appointment please visit Anzu on level three. If you'd like to file a complaint, please talk to Jounouchi on level five. If you have any questions, feel free to ask!"

Malik folded his arms. This Mana girl was ridiculously happy for being a secretary.

Ryou didn't say anything, instead gently tapping on the table.

Mana looked up. Then she let out a scream.

"Ryou! Ryou!" she hollered, tearing her headset off and jumping across the table, tackling Ryou to the ground.

Malik looked down at the scene, a series of emotions swirling in his head. Each one was different but by far the loudest one was '_Get off him_!'

But Malik didn't say anything because he was a good friend and didn't want to upset Ryou.

Malik blinked, replaying that thought in his head again. Since when were he and Ryou friends?

Mana finally got off of Ryou, but she hadn't stopped the screaming.

"You're alive – you're alive! I can't believe it! Atemu's going to be so happy! And Yuugi – Yuugi! He was so heartbroken all this week…I thought I'd never see him happy again…But that doesn't matter because you're back! You're alive!"

She hugged him once again before turning around and typing something into her computer.

"What does she mean 'back'?" Malik asked and Ryou at least remembered his presence.

He took out his pad and wrote.

**Ask Bakura.**

Malik gazed at Bakura, who had a look of utter death on his face. Like at any moment he was going to pounce and skin some poor soul alive.

The lavender eyed boy snorted. Ask Bakura. He didn't have a death wish.

Mana came bouncing back before Malik had a chance to ask Ryou more questions.

"So I just unlocked the fiftieth floor and you need to go up there right now! You still remember the password right? Well of course you do, you've only been gone like a week!"

Ryou smiled and started to walk towards the elevator. Malik and Bakura followed.

Mana waved, "I'm so glad you're alive!"

-0-

"Who was that?" Malik asked with fire in his eyes, as soon as the elevator doors slammed shut.

Ryou frowned, surprised at his tone. He took out his marker.

**A friend of a friend. We worked together.**

Malik still glared, but felt a little bit better now with an explanation.

Bakura, meanwhile, was sulking. He radiated hatred from every pore, though most of it was directed at Ryou. Malik thought about asking him what was wrong but didn't want that hatred burning him. Bakura was scary.

Ryou wasn't afraid though, either that or he was just plain stupid and wrote down on his notepad.

**What's wrong?**

Bakura sneered and ignored him.

Ryou eyes narrowed.

**Tell me. Or I'll start throwing the papers at you again.**

"Again?" Malik asked, "When did you start?"

Bakura glowered harder at Ryou, if that was even possible.

Ryou wasn't taking the hint because he wrote down yet another note.

**I'm glad you're here.**

Bakura's mouth dropped opened.

"Just what the _hell_ is that supposed to mean?"

Before either Ryou or Malik could respond the elevators dinged open but instead of a room, the doors opened to another wall that had a small electronic box on it.

Malik sighed. This place was so weird.

Ryou stepped towards it with ease and typed in a pass code. The wall opened and this time there was actually a room. Okay, so it was more like a hallway decked out in way too much red, but still. Better than being trapped in an elevator.

The next three things happened very quickly, and Malik in the depth of his stomach knew that it was important.

Two boys, almost identical in the same way that Ryou and Bakura were almost identical, walked into the hallway. They had the craziest hair Malik had ever seen, and he knew Bakura.

The second thing was that Bakura tensed dramatically, the way he did when he was about to kill a demon.

The final thing was that Ryou jumped out of the elevator so fast it almost knocked Malik over.

"Ryou?" Malik gasped out.

That got the attention of the other two boys. The slightly smaller looked up for one second and then tears spilled from his eyes.

"You're alive. Ryou! You're alive!" the boy cried out running into his arms like Mana had done just moments before.

Except this time, Ryou returned the hug with just as much enthusiasm as the other boy had.

Malik stood there, seething. What had these people done for Ryou to get him to hug them? Malik had broken at least every rule in his Guide, gotten his house destroyed, and more or less scared himself mentally for the rest of his life and all he ever got was a couple of smiles here and there. Never a hug.

…

Not that he wanted a hug. Or something. Yeah.

Malik was sure that an hour had passed before they stopped hugging.

The other boy, the taller one, older too by the looks of it, stepped forward.

"Ryou," he said and gave the boy a warm smile. Then he turned his eyes to Malik.

"Just who exactly might you be?" the man asked, voice smooth and prideful. Malik hated him already.

"You first," Malik snapped back.

The man seemed shocked for a second by Malik's attitude and was only stopped from talking when Ryou handed both Malik and the man two pieces of paper.

Malik looked down at his.

**The taller one is named Atemu. He's the Pharaoh. And the other one is Yuugi. They're both my friends so please try to be nice.**

Scoffing Malik crumpled the note to the ground.

"So your name's Malik," Atemu said.

"It is."

Malik was determined to give the shortest answers possible, just to be a prick.

"And you saved Ryou from the shadows."

"Yup."

Atemu was visibly getting frustrated and the sight was so pleasing to Malik that he couldn't help but smirk.

"Well, I'd like to..." Atemu took a deep breath, "Thank you for returning Ryou to us. If you talk with Mana at the front desk she'll tell you about your reward."

_Returning? He's not property_, Malik thought. _And if he was Bakura and I would own him like seven times over by now._

"Spectacular," Malik said, with a fake smile.

Atemu eyes hardened and his posture shifted.

"You can leave now," he said.

Malik snarled, "I'm not leaving until I know he's safe!"

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Ryou blush.

"He's perfectly safe here!" Atemu huffed, "He's safer with us than he could ever be with you. He belongs with us."

That did it.

"Like hell he does! Do you know how many times I've risked my life for this kid over the past couple of hours? Do you really think we are just going to let him go so easily?" Malik shouted.

Yuugi was taken aback by this, but Atemu narrowed his eyes in suspicion.

"What do you mean by 'we'?" he asked, glaring at Malik.

Bakura calmly stepped out of the elevator.

"He means me."

Atemu's eyes widened to ridiculous proportions.

"_Bakura_!"

"You know each other?" Malik asked, bewildered.

Bakura ignored them both. He waltzed over to the dazed Ryou, pulled him by his arm and slammed him into his chest.

Ryou's face flushed a bright red and his already confused face only escalated.

"We're leaving," he said, to both Ryou and Malik.

"Fine by me," Malik said, already beginning to turn away.

Ryou finally squirmed his way out of Bakura's hold. He reached down for his pad, only to find there was no paper left and threw it to the ground in frustration. Ryou reached for Bakura's hand, pulled up his sleeve and then wrote a single word, underlined three times.

**Family**.

Bakura's eyes found Ryou's. They were so determined, so needy, practically screaming at Bakura that he needed to _understand_ and he needed to _let go_.

Damn it all! He hated this stupid kid who just showed up on his doorstep and had the nerve to shake up Bakura's perfectly content life – and it was bad enough already because of Malik – and this boy he –

The marker was pressed to his skin again, breaking his thoughts.

**Where else can we go?**

We. He was beginning to loathe the invention of that word.

Bakura shook the boy off him.

"We're not leaving," he said.

Ryou smiled, but only a bit.

"I should have you arrested!" Atemu snarled.

Suddenly, Bakura remembered that that bastard was here and still alive and still breathing.

A whole new wave of rage washed through him.

Before Bakura could put the _Pharaoh_ in his place, there was a soft sound, like the sound of scratching or whistling. Bakura looked down and saw that his shadow had moved itself away from him.

Atemu, Ryou and Yuugi saw the same.

"Yuugi," Atemu said. Yuugi nodded. White feathery wings expanded from their backs.

They both opened their hands ever so slightly and a beam of red light shimmered in the air above them, Atemu's a darker red then Yuugi's, until the light solidified into a sword.

"Hey that looks just like the one Ryou–" Malik's sentence was cut off when a shadow demon wrenched itself from the core of Malik's shadow. He stumbled into Ryou's arms, gasping a bit, before he pulled out his gun and shot.

"You know, last time we met you might have caught me off guard," he fired three more shots, "But this time I'm prepared."

The demon fizzled out. Bakura would hardly call that a victory.

All around them, shadows emerged from every corner. They walked towards them, darkness and pure energy crackling around them.

It was twice as hard to kill a shadow demon than any other type of demon when you were using mortal weapons – without any infuse of magic.

The demons' eyes, red and endless, seemed to devour Bakura on sight.

By instinct alone, Bakura stole a glance at Ryou. He was looking down, but only for a second.

They met each other's gaze.

Ryou clenched the handle of the knife tighter and gave Bakura an unsure nod. Somehow, Bakura understood.

_If we go down, we go down together._

And then the darkness was upon them.

-0-

Malik felt an icy pain slash through his right arm. He shot even harder, pushing back the pain and the absurd coldness. His body shivered despite himself.

"Ryou!" Malik shouted, "Bakura!"

Another dose of that icy pain. Malik fell to his knees. He couldn't shoot at anything. The darkness was all around him, consuming him, killing him–

He was going to die.

Malik cried out their names one last time.

-0-

Ryou had never been good with words. Especially before he came to work for Atemu. He had always slipped up or stumbled ("Sorry! Oh, I'm so sorry I didn't mean it like that.") so eventually he just gave up.

He didn't mind being quiet. He liked watching. He didn't miss his voice that much.

(The darkness lashed out at him again, but Ryou didn't really feel it.)

That was why Ryou had agreed to work for Atemu. Not because he believed in what they were doing, like Yuugi and Mahaado and Jounouchi did, but because it made him feel powerful. They gave him the words (words that he normally couldn't grasp), the spells, and he could perform them and do something. Be worth something. He wanted…needed…that.

Needy.

Amane had called him that once. Maybe. It was hard to tell in the darkness he was in right now, it distorted memories.

He should have just died. When the demons ripped off his wings he should have just died like anyone else would have. Then they wouldn't be in this mess right now – then everyone would live.

But then…then he never would have met Malik or Bakura.

A small light bloomed in his chest at the thought of them, so when the darkness whipped at him, it _hurt_.

Ryou let out a cry of pain (it's okay to be weak here, no one's watching...). Why did it hurt when he thought about them? He'd known Yuugi for five years and Yuugi had always been so sweet and kind –

But when the darkness hit–

Pain, but bearable.

Hm. He still wasn't dead. Was Malik? Was Bakura?

They'd hate him. While dying. (The thought fills him with so much grief he didn't even move when the darkness hit him.) They'd curse him for bringing this on them, when their only crime had been saving his life.

He'd never get to say sorry. He'd never get to see them again.

He would never see Malik's smile, or the way he got flustered whenever Bakura said just about anything to him. He would never see the way Bakura's expression softened when he thought no one was looking.

The darkness clawed at him.

He just wanted to see them again…just once if he could…

Ryou looked up and in the distance; through the darkness he saw a soft wispy strand of blue light.

There – right there – it had been there all along!

Ryou reached for it, and without saying anything, without a single word, he knew.

-0-

It started softly.

A small whisper in the background. Malik ignored it, just as he ignored the whispers from his sister. He wasn't stupid. He knew the darkness was trying to trick him.

But then the sound grew. Louder and louder until Malik had no choice but to turn around and ask whoever that was if they would mind shutting up so that he could die in peace.

He didn't see a person though. Not yet. A beam of pale, beautiful blue light shone in the darkness and as the words grew louder, the light grew bigger. Bigger and bigger, pushing back the darkness until Malik could see Bakura right by his side. Where he'd always been.

They exchanged looks, and Malik knew that he knew.

The blue light burst.

"_Ryou_!"

The darkness disappeared.

It hissed and reached out but the light forced it away. Ryou forced it away. He didn't have wings, like Yuugi or Atemu did, but he was still flying with his sword in his hand, shining like some sort of beacon.

Malik couldn't help but smirk. To his right, Bakura snorted.

Ryou looked down at them. The sword disappeared, as did the blue light. His feet landed on the ground.

And he smiled.

"Thank you," Ryou said, "for saving me."

-0-

"So the Pharaoh's not going to have you arrested, which is pretty awesome, right Bakura?" Malik chattered on.

Bakura rolled his eyes, "The _Pharaoh_ couldn't arrest me if he tried. He just wants an excuse to stop trying."

"I still don't understand how that nickname started in the first place," Ryou muttered under his breath.

Bakura stopped for a second and looked at him. It was still odd, even though it had been three days, to hear his voice.

"You sound like a girl," Malik said.

Ryou huffed, "At least I don't dress like one."

Before Bakura knew it, the laugh ripped right out of him.

Malik glared, "Shut up."

"Don't be mad because he has a point."

Malik let out an aggravated sigh, "I don't know how I put up with you two."

Ryou's eyes, like always, found Bakura's.

"You put up with us?" Bakura asked, crossing his arms.

"Yes! I put up with you!" Malik snapped, "I put up with you being all cryptic and anti-social all the time! You still haven't told me how you and Atemu even know each other in first place."

"I haven't told Ryou either, so don't feel left out."

Malik glowered, but continued, "Plus! You two got my house destroyed and still no one has told me just what happened that day or how Ryou got his voice back or just why you and Ryou look so much alike – "

Ryou opened his mouth.

"If you say coincidence I'm going to slap you."

Ryou closed his mouth.

Malik sighed, "It's obvious I'm the victim here."

Ryou laughed lightly at that. They walked out of the giant glowing office building and into the new Domino City. Ever since that day, demon attacks had gone down by over eighty percent. People weren't afraid anymore.

"Do you think they'll come back?" Ryou asked, looking at the crowded street, "The shadows?"

"Yes," Bakura said automatically, "They always do."

Ryou sighed heavily and stared at the ground. Malik wrapped his arm around the boy.

"Well then I guess it's a good thing that we can totally kick any type of demon ass, right?"

A blink, and then Ryou smiled.

"Right."

They walked together without words for a moment before Malik spoke again.

"If they come back would you go back to Atemu again?" he asked.

"No," Ryou said, certain, "Even if I wanted to, I can't. I'm human, remember?"

Bakura snorted at that.

Malik looked into Ryou's eyes.

"So why did you change your mind?" Malik said, slowly, "Why did you stay?"

Ryou tilted his head but then reached for Bakura's arm. He didn't say anything as he rolled up Bakura's sleeve. Instead he simply pointed at a single word written, underlined three times.

**Family**.

* * *

A/N This chapter gave me so many issues you don't even know. A review would totally brighten my day! Please review!


	76. Of Lack of Family

A/N Takes place just before Millennium World.

* * *

_In every conceivable manner, the family is link to our past, bridge to our future. ~ Alex Haley_

* * *

"Tell me about your sister."

They are alike in that regard, the thief and the spirit. Commanding. It radiates of their presence, like royalty.

(Ryou is both insignificant and unable to resist.)

But the thief's words are warmer than the spirit's, spoken hushed and passionate.

_Perhaps it's not fair_, Ryou thinks as the thief scoops him into his gold covered arms, _to compare them_. _They're different._ (_The same way the spirit and I are different – _but that thought goes unnoted, dissolves into the emptiness of Ryou's mind.)

"Why?" Ryou asks. He knows the reason, he dreams, no matter how hard the spirit fights to keep the ghosts contained. The question is directed at the thief asking, when he could simply take.

The thief intertwines their fingers.

"Because you're mine, right? So your family is my family, too."

The thief pulls Ryou in closer, so close that Ryou can smell the ash from the never-ending fire on him. It's not particularly bad (or real, to be honest), so he breaths in deep yet again.

He's just another possession to both the thief and the spirit, not a person. The truth leaves a bitter tang in his mouth, but at least right here – _right now_ – the thief treats him kindly. Or as close to kind as any of them can get.

On cue, the thief leans in and rests his head on Ryou's shoulder.

Ryou relaxes into the touch. Because honestly – why not? He has nothing left to lose – no _family_ left to lose. Mother and Amane are dead, Yuugi will hate him for this (how could he not?), his father hates him too, even if he denies it.

Ryou only has the ring and his name.

(And both those things belong to the spirit now, anyway.)

Hot breath on his neck wakes him out of his daze.

"Tell me, landlord," the thief whispers, caressing him, "I want to know."

* * *

A/N Reviews shall be huggled!


	77. The Last Life of a Dream

A/N Late update on the account of school work. Two (fairly platonic) boy on boy kisses.

EDIT: I HATE YOU AND YOUR FORMAT FFNET YOU TOOK AWAY MY THREE DASHES. -sigh- EDIT TWO: OMG THEY TOOK MY DASHES AWAY FROM MY OTHER CHAPTERS TOO. HOLY CRAP I'M GOING TO HAVE TO REINSERT THEM FOR LIKE 60 CHAPTERS. -dies-

* * *

_Our life is composed greatly from dreams, from the unconscious, and they must be brought into connection with action. They must be woven together. ~ Anais Nin  
_

* * *

"Are you awake? Ryou? Ryou? Are you awake?"

Ryou opened his eyes in one quick motion, gasping as he did so. The small lamp on his nightstand was on. He pushed himself into a sitting position only to come face to face with wide, puffy, green eyes.

Amane.

"Amane?" Ryou asked, dazed, "_Amane_. What are you doing up? Ugh – what time is it?"

She clutched the light blue blanket, bowed her head and trembled.

Panic flared up in Ryou.

"Are you _crying_?"

Amane let out a howl. She collapsed, sobbing so hard that it shook her entire frame. Ryou pushed away his blankets and pulled her close.

"Shh," he whispered, trying mimic their mother, "It's okay. Tell me what's wrong. I'm here now, so everything's okay."

Amane snuggled into his shoulder, "I had a bad dream."

Ryou petted her hair, "What about?"

-0-

"Ryou."

His father didn't say his name like his mother or Amane did. It never came out the same. Sometimes…sometimes it would sound like he was trying to say it the same (like the few times they were together for his birthday or Christmas). But mostly, mostly it would sound –

"_Ryou_."

Like that. Cold and distant.

Ryou turned around, away from his family's summer cottage.

"Yes, father?"

"There's been a change of plans. We're leaving tomorrow."

Any color that Ryou had drained from his face.

"But you said–"

"I know what I said!" his father cut him off, growling between clenched teeth, "But this is what I am saying now."

Ryou looked away, muttering to himself, "I don't understand why I have to leave at all. I want to stay here, with Amane and Mom."

"Look, Ryou, if I could leave you here I would!" his father shouted, suddenly looking very old and rigid.

Ryou's eyes widened and he blinked back tears.

His father blanched.

"Just go," he said wearily, "Play with your sister or something."

-0-

"That doesn't sound so bad, Amane," Ryou whispered, calmly and gently.

Amane pulled herself away from him as tears rolled down her face.

"It gets worse!" she insisted, more tears spilling out.

Ryou kissed her forehead, trying to calm her, trying to tell her that everything would be alright.

"It's okay, Amane. I believe you. How does it get worse?"

Amane wiped away her tears. Then, she looked up.

"I die."

-0-

A soft wind blew past him like a gentle caress.

Ryou closed his eyes, committing the moment to memory. Something was wrong, he knew it, he felt it, he saw it. His mother smiled too much now; it never reached her eyes. His father was gone for twice as long now and when he was home, he just locked himself in his room. And now that his father was taking Ryou with him on his next trip…nothing was going to be the same again.

So the right here, the right now needed to be savored. The wind blowing past him, the sound of ocean crashing against the rocky shore, the forget-me-not's beneath his feet – all of that needed to be remembered. It was too perfect not to be.

"Big brother!" Amane called as she ran down the field of bluish purple flowers and tall grass, "Mommy's here!"

Ryou looked down from the hilltop and saw his mother's car drive alongside the ocean. He smiled, a bit sadly.

Amane rushed down the hill, gaining speed.

A peculiar feeling gnawed at Ryou's guts.

"Amane!" Ryou shouted, "Amane, slow down!"

Time did not stop. It did not slow nor did it speed up. Instead, Ryou was overcome with the sense that he was no longer seeing something, but taking a picture of it. The world did not flow together; instead it became a series of unrelated photos. Photos only subtly different from the last.

His mother's car maneuvered around the sharp rocks, pulling closer to the mouth of the driveway. Amane tripped, tumbling from the edge of the field into the road.

The car spun. Amane dived.

A soft wind blew past him like a gentle caress.

-0-

The blood inside of Ryou froze. He broke out into a cold sweat.

Desperate to not only ease his own fear, but the fear of his snivelling sister, Ryou pulled her into another hug.

"But you're still alive, Amane. See?" He squeezed her tight, "You're still alive!"

Amane pushed him away.

"No, no, _no_!" she screeched, fresh tears breaking out, "You don't get it, Ryou! This isn't about me!"

Ryou blinked.

"Then what was the nightmare about?"

"You."

She paused, then sneered, "And that _ring_."

-0-

He woke up with the ring on. Ryou used to find that unusual (he was always sure to place the ring on his nightstand before bed) but now it was expected.

(He traced the pattern of the ring lightly.)

Welcomed, even.

He should find that bizarre, but his whole life was bizarre, so was this ring really that much of a difference? At least it was beautiful. Better than friends in comas.

A quick look at the clock told him that it was already time to get ready for a new school. He hoped that his father was right. Whatever was happening would just stop once he started this new school.

Ryou sighed and stirred his tea.

It was, after all, such a hassle to keep losing friends. Keep transferring schools.

Such a _hassle_ to keep caring.

(He's jaded and he's knows it, but he's quiet so it doesn't matter.)

After another five minutes or so of indecision, he grabbed his backpack and began his funeral march. School was only a ten minute walk away.

Maybe things would be different this time. Maybe his reputation would precede him and people would just leave him alone. He'd been alone for so long, it doesn't even really bother him that much anymore. And he's not completely soulless (not yet). Ryou didn't want anyone else hurt.

"Umf!" Ryou let out a strangled gasp as someone bumped straight into him.

"Sorry!" said the boy, "I'm so sorry, I didn't even see you."

"It's okay," Ryou mumbled, picking up his books.

"I'm Yuugi, by the way," the boy said, offering a wide smile and his hand.

He had never seen a smile like that before. It was so bright and pure (and for him? How was that possible?). Ryou didn't catch the pendent, a sibling to his own ring; until he looked at Yuugi's outstretched hand.

It wasn't beautiful like his ring, but deep in his soul he wanted it all the same.

(A feeling overtook him, a feeling he had only ever had once before, the day his sister died.)

Yuugi's hand, close to the pendant that hung from his neck, was still there – waiting for him.

_Don't take it. Don't take it._

Ryou did. It was soft and warm.

"My name's Bakura," he said, strangely out of breath.

"Well Bakura-kun," Yuugi grinned, "I'm sure we'll be great friends!"

-0-

"He would have been good for you," Amane said.

Both she and Ryou were too involved in the story to be truly frightened at that point.

She repeated herself, "He would have been good for you if you'd let him."

-0-

Ryou collapsed onto his bed the moment he got to his apartment. All throughout his first day of school, he had this pain in his chest. Like someone was stabbing him with little knives. And he had the most awful headache, especially when people talked to him (especially when _Yuugi_ talked to him).

And…and…

(And he saw things, out of the corner of his eye. A man. Shadows.)

So I've finally gone crazy, he thought, flipping over and staring wide-eyed at the ceiling.

A dark chuckle filled his ears. Ryou bolted upright.

"Who's there?" Ryou called.

_Oh relax, Landlord. It's just me._

Ryou's body tensed, every inch of him awakening.

"Where are you?" he yelled, walking cautiously out of his room and into the hallway, "And what do you mean by 'landlord'?"

_Host. Vessel. Take your pick; they're all the same. After all, it's what you are._

Ryou sank to his knees as another stabbing sensation pierced him.

_You see, I've taken up permanent residence in your body. I'm your tenant, which makes you my landlord._

Ryou moaned in agony and the knives twisted deeper into him. He grasped at his chest, trying to make it stop, when he felt it. The ring. It was the ring.

_Very good. Would you like a pat on the head, Landlord?_

Indignation flared up in Ryou. He was in pain and this voice had the nerve to be sarcastic to him?

_I was being honest. I've been here for quite some time and you've never noticed. Though I suppose…_

The voice paused for a second, deep in thought.

_Perhaps…perhaps this is the puzzle's doing. How fitting, then. So close too, right within our grasp, Landlord. It shouldn't be hard to possess it, especially when _his_ container – what was his name, Yuugi? – seems so fond of you. Actually you seemed rather fond of him yourself, Landlord. I think that was first time you ever disobeyed me. Now we can't have that, can we?_

Ryou couldn't see it, but he could feel the (rambling) voice's smirk.

_Hmm, maybe you would like another player for your Monster World?_

"What are you talking about?" Ryou demanded. He was honestly fed up. Blood was leaking through his shirt, he was hearing a voice inside his head, and most importantly none of the things the voice said made any sense to him. If he had to have a voice couldn't it at least be coherent?

_You reincarnations always seem to forget. It's such a hassle to continuously remind you, Landlord. You're going have to remember on your own._

"Reincarnation?" Ryou asked, shaking his head, "Remember what?"

_Your promise._

"What promise?" said Ryou, almost in hysterics.

_I'm going to unleash eternal darkness, Landlord. And you're going to help me._

That voice was smirking again, Ryou could just feel it.

It dawned on Ryou that this no longer had to do with his sanity, or his life. He was suddenly aware that from then on the choices he would make would impact much more than his isolated slice of the world.

"I-I won't," he stuttered, out of disbelief and primal fear, "I won't!"

The air in front of him shimmered, as if a million prisms had just been inserted into the empty space, and everything was reflecting off of a reflection. It was the way Ryou imagined what a desert mirage would look like, from the stories his father used to tell. The most logical conclusion would be that whatever he saw would not be real.

(But…)

But it was real. A man formed; hovering a few inches off the ground, completely see through. It was himself. His long white hair, his brown eyes, his ring. But…the white hair was too spiky and sharp, the brown eyes were too narrow and dark, and the ring no longer felt like it belonged to him.

"Oh, Landlord," the twisted version of himself laughed. He floated down and pressed a tender kiss on a stunned Ryou's forehead.

"You won't have a choice."

-0-

"I hate him," Amane said, more serious than Ryou had ever seen her. (That terrified him.)

"I hate him more than I'll ever hate anyone."

"But Amane," Ryou pleaded, "He's not real. It was just a bad dream."

Amane looked up at him, as if he had just told her that the sky was orange.

"Aren't you listening, big brother?"

-0-

His soul room decays very easily, which would be a brilliant metaphor, if he cared.

He's been trapped in here for too long (could it still even be called entrapment?). The only thing he really cared about was Yuugi and, by default, Yuugi's friend. Salvation too, but Yuugi had come to mean that as well. Ryou liked to think that if things had been different, (if he had been stronger, if the spirit had been weaker), maybe they could have been happy together.

He sighed.

Even in his own soul, his thoughts swirled and spun and were suppressed. No time for analyses. He must focus on the action. The melting of his light blue walls. He reached out and touched it. It burned as it grabbed hold of him, thrusting him into the spirit's world.

He's been here many times before, but he still doesn't quite understand who that small boy is. Is it him? Is it the spirit? Ryou always followed the boy with grey hair and tan skin regardless of which answer he chose to accept that day.

And that boy would always run from the same handful of guards, hiding just in time.

Ryou's heart would always skip a beat as their spears hovered over the vase.

But in the end they walked away, leaving just the boy and Ryou alone in an empty hut. The boy would follow the guards once they had left.

"You're stupid," he told the boy, even though the boy can't hear him, "If you had just stayed there, if just hadn't made a fuss, you never would have seen any of that. You could have been normal."

He realized the hypocrisy, doing nothing had not made him any more normal, but Ryou said it anyway. It wasn't like the boy could hear him.

The boy followed the guard's down a hidden path, into a dark cave. Then the boy would watch in horror and be broken beyond repair. Even after millennia had past.

The next part changed, depending. Maybe it changed more often than he thought as there had been many a time when Ryou would just close his eyes and refuse to see.

But he watched, now.

The flames grew brighter as they consumed more people. Some faces he recognized (Amane's, Yuugi's, his mother's) others he didn't, but did anyway.

He should be broken. But he wasn't.

So he knew he was dreaming.

(_"Are you awake? Ryou? Ryou? Are you awake?"_)

"Landlord."

A voice, cold and reserved, but somehow so enticing.

"Yes?"

The spirit folded his arms as he lingered in Ryou's doorway.

"What were you doing?"

"Dreaming," Ryou responded.

There was silence as the spirit waited for a better answer.

"About us."

-0-

"What was its name?" Ryou asked, feeling so strange and overcome by desire, "The village. What was its name?"

Amane shrank and looked down.

"I don't remember."

-0-

"I don't like you," Ryou said, as the spirit walked into Ryou's soul room.

"I never would have guessed."

"You don't like me, either. Remember?" He pointed to the walls, words, invisible to a person who wasn't looking, inscribed on them, "The things you said?"

The spirit rolled his eyes.

"I was rereading them when it occurred to me. You don't like me but you _understand_ me. So I thought, since I don't like you, maybe that means I could understand you too."

Ryou sighed.

"I've been staring at this ceiling for God knows how long, trying to figure you out."

The spirit sauntered towards him, "And, my dear landlord? What have you found?"

"Facts. A couple at least. You're meticulous, for one. And insane. Patient and clever and apathetic and conniving – and did I mention insane?"

The spirit gave him a warning look. Half-amused, half-threatening.

Ryou ignored it.

"But those were just facts. Just things I knew. The truth is I don't understand you at all. I could spend the rest of my life looking at this ceiling and you'll always just be _you_. Some divine sort of machine whose results I can see, but no matter how hard I try I can't see the gears."

A snort. "How poetic."

"But me. I'm me, I can see within myself, and I don't like myself so the same logic should apply, right?" Ryou's eyebrows furrowed, "So I just thought about the major things you need to know to understand someone. What they hate–"

For a split second, Ryou's eyes left the ceiling and turned towards the spirit.

"–and what they loved. And then I was just…"

He paused, retreating back into his own thoughts.

"Finish your sentence, Landlord," the spirit commanded.

"I was just thinking," Ryou sighed, "that I've never really loved anyone but Amane. I like Yuugi; I think I still care about him, a little. Enough to not want him to die. But I don't love him. Isn't that what a soul is, though? The ability to keep loving, no matter what? Amane's dead. And I haven't loved anyone since. So does that mean my soul died with her? Does that mean I don't have a soul anymore? You don't have a soul. So then I thought…"

"Thought what, host?" the spirit growled.

"I thought that made us like kindred spirits, or something," Ryou closed his eyes, "And then I realized that I do like you. In a weird way. I'd miss you if you were gone."

"You think too much," sneered the spirit.

"I do," Ryou agreed, "But I thought some more, anyway. About Amane…and you."

He opened his eyes, rolled over, and faced the spirit.

"If I help you willingly, would you let me see my sister again? It doesn't have to be _real_ as long as it's her. And it just has to be long enough for me to ask her something. That's it. Then you can do whatever it was you were going to do to me. When it's over."

The spirit stared into Ryou's eyes for eternity.

Then, agreed.

-0-

Amane cried again. The nightmare's hold over Ryou broke and he cradled his sister yet again.

"It's okay, Amane. None of that happened. It's not real," he soothed.

"It was horrible, Ryou," she sobbed, "I was there. Right there! And I couldn't even stop you – couldn't even hug you – because I was dead!"

"But you're not dead, Amane. You're right here and you're not dead," he said, rocking her.

"But what if that doesn't change anything?!"

-0-

_Yuugi will die in here._

It was morbidly fascinating to think about. Just the slightest glimpse of the thought sent shivers down Ryou's spine (and not always unpleasantly).

_I am building this and creating this so that Yuugi will die._

It was bizarre. A weird sort of half-dream where he knew he could wake up at anytime he wanted to, but didn't. ("_Are you awake? Ryou?_–")

He dipped his brush and then painted red.

"You've gotten the color just right, Landlord," said the spirit, taking translucent form besides him.

"You sound surprised."

"I am. I didn't think you paid such close attention," he eyed the RPG board up and down, "to the details."

"Isn't that what you wanted? Don't forget that I agreed to this," Ryou said, still absorbed by his work, "I want to give it my best effort."

The spirit said nothing, just stared.

Ryou placed the figurine of the grown up boy of his dreams on table. He walked towards the spirit, who, as always, was just a little bit taller than him. Just a little out of his reach.

Ever the pragmatist, Ryou stood on his tippy toes, and pressed a kiss to the spirit's cheek. It quivered there for a second.

Ryou continued to walk towards his backpack and swung it over his shoulder. He took one last look at the spirit.

"I'm going to school now," he said, to the form that hadn't moved an inch, "so you can look at it all you like."

It wasn't finished though, and Ryou knew he'd be working on it all night instead of on his homework.

(He looked forward to it.)

-0-

"You knew it was bad," Amane said, twisting her fingers into his and looking into a dazed Ryou's eyes, "And you just kept going…"

-0-

He was being followed.

Ryou was accustomed to things following him while they lurked in the shadows, but this was different. This was distinctly human. More than one, too. Probably some thugs, looking for an easy target. Ryou almost dared them to. If they tried to harm him the spirit would kill them…

(It was empowering, that knowledge, almost to the point of intoxication.)

As drunk as Ryou was, he didn't notice when one of his stalkers came up from behind him and punched him. Ryou fell to the ground with a thud and while he was regaining his senses another one of the assailants ripped his ring away from him.

His ring.

(Ryou was cold all over, shaking, so freezing…the ring…he needed the ring…)

"Give me. Back. My ring," Ryou growled out, eyes darken. Two thugs took hold of him.

"Oooh!" said the thug with blue eyes, "Would you look at that, Akito? Little poodle's got a bark."

The boy with his ring (hishishis!), Akito, smirked.

"Who would have ever thought? Besides..." said Akito, slipping the ring over his neck.

"_Give it back to me now_!" Ryou roared, struggling against the two thugs hold on him.

"I don't like this kid's attitude," said the blue eyed thug.

"Me neither," agreed Akito, cracking his knuckles, "Maybe he needs a lesson in manners."

The two thugs holding him laughed.

It was like a false wake from a dream. When you awake from one dream only to be in another. Foggy awareness, but still the smeared, fast-pace, dream state.

(It was so cold.)

Ryou's hand slid over the knife.

Akito took a step forward.

_He took it he took he took it_ (hetookhim) _he took it he took it…_

Ryou pulled the knife out and stabbed the thug on his left in the gut. As he fell to his knees, Ryou stabbed him in the back again. The one second advantage of surprise Ryou had wore off and the other two thugs charged at him while Akito backed away. It was easy work. His body remembered the spirit's movements of the blades and Ryou had always been a good dodger.

Wiping the blood on his pants, he stalked towards Akito. When the boy turned to make a run, Ryou pounced on him. Ryou flipped him over and stared at his ring.

The boy squirmed underneath him. _Akito_ squirmed underneath him. (If he has a name, does he have a family? A sister waiting for him when he gets home so that he'll chase away all her bad dreams?)

"P-please, I'm sorry," he begged, "Please."

Ryou placed the knife to edge of the rope. He dragged a line across the Akito's throat, a thin trail of blood following his knife. The ring pulled off of the boy without hesitation.

The boy gasped and gurgled and was altogether revolting but Ryou didn't mind. The ring's warmth was in his heads again, and suddenly he felt sane.

-0-

"A-a-amane," Ryou stuttered out, squeezing his sister too tight, "I-I would never. You know me. Amane! I would never do _anything_ like that…"

She sobbed loudly into his chest.

"But you _did_!"

-0-

"Oh, I am so proud of you, landlord," the spirit purred, as he curled himself into a ball, "Of course, I was quite looking forward to shredding that mortal's soul apart, but I'll admit, this was a nice change of pace."

"Just leave me alone," Ryou croaked out, voice raw and sore. Even in his soul room.

The spirit laughed and draped an arm around him, "But you don't really want that, do you, Landlord? You want me to stay with you forever. That's why you killed them."

"That's not true!" Ryou shouted.

"It isn't?" the spirit feigned belief, "Then why did you kill them?"

"I-I was scared," Ryou said, stumbling over his own words, "I was scared – they were going to kill me. It was self defense! That's all!"

The spirit made a tsk tsk sound.

"They weren't even armed, landlord of mine."

Ryou closed his eyes, desperately searching for another excuse.

"It was mercy killing!" Ryou exclaimed.

"Oh?"

Ryou nodded, "I knew that, once you got the strength, you would torture them, curse them to the darkness forever! I thought…I thought it would better if I just…"

"Still can't say it? Killed them, Landlord, you killed them."

Ryou cringed.

"Besides," the spirit said, cupping Ryou's chin, "That's not the real reason at all. Why did you kill them? Hmm?"

The spirit lowered his face just centimeters away from Ryou's own.

"Why?"

The truth burst out of him like a gun, like an atomic bomb.

"Because they _took_ you away from _me_!"

The spirit stared for a second as his smirk consumed his entire face. He threw his head back and laughed, louder than Ryou had ever heard it.

"I truly do own you, don't I?"

Ryou trembled, holding back tears.

"So how did it feel, Landlord? To take a life?" the spirit whispered into his ear.

"I thought it was horrible. When you killed in my body you always pushed me out just as I saw that look in their eyes. I never saw it go out, just saw it starting. I thought that I'd never be able to do it because of that look. But then I saw it – saw it go out and…"

The spirit smirked, wrapping his arms around Ryou.

"And what, my most precious little landlord?"

"It didn't bother me."

He let out a small sob, which sounded more like laugh than anything.

-0-

"I just don't understand, big brother," Amane said, wiping away her tears, "How you could need him so much..."

Ryou didn't have an answer to that, mostly because it hadn't been his nightmare, it had been Amane's and…

Well, if there was an answer to a question like that, Amane was better off not knowing.

-0-

Ryou woke up. He felt confused and bewildered as his senses slowly returned to him.

Sight. (Sand…desert sand…a village…_that_ village.)

Taste. (Mouth dry, when was the last time he drank?)

Touch. (The ring was gone but the scars were still there, so this wasn't a dream.)

Smell. (Something was burning…)

Sound. ("_Bakura_!")

Ryou slowly pried himself of the desert floor. Who was that calling him?

"Bakura!" exclaimed a voice, laced with righteous fury, "Stop this madness now!"

Pharaoh.

He saw them all now. The Pharaoh and Yuugi, Anzu and Honda and Jounouchi, The Pharaoh's priests, (who'd he only ever seen through fragmented memories and half-awake dreams).

"Yuugi-kun?" Ryou asked. He'd forgotten…he'd forgotten what Yuugi's presence felt like. It was so warm.

Yuugi blinked, "Bakura-kun?"

"What's going on?" Ryou asked, which wasn't a lie.

"Guys," Anzu said, relief coating her voice, "I think that's the real Bakura."

The real Bakura? Ryou thought, fairly amused, there's a real Bakura out there?

"Bakura-kun," Yuugi said, rushing towards, "There's no time to explain. We have to find a place to hid now."

Ryou looked over Yuugi's shoulder.

The darkness was consuming.

"I think I saw an entrance to a cave over here," Ryou said, leading them down the path both he and that boy had travelled many a time.

-0-

"I don't really remember much after that," Amane admitted, "it just sort of blurs together."

Ryou looked down at her, "What do you remember?"

-0-

The shadows clawed and reached for them as Ryou led them to the birthplace of the millennium items.

_"If I told you I was sorry, would you believe me?"_

("If we have faith, I know we'll get through this. I know we'll beat Zorc!")

"How could you, Bakura-kun?"

_"Be careful," Ryou said, "The rock is slippery."_

("The darkness is stronger and I am weak.")

The fire was still burning when they got to the end of the tunnel.

("Yuugi – move!")

_"You were the only best friend I ever had."_

-0-

Amane paused for no longer than a heartbeat and eyed the shadows of his bedroom suspiciously.

"I do remember the last part good, though," she said.

-0-

The rock shook and gave way. The world was suddenly made of photos and Ryou could see what was coming.

"Yuugi – move!" Ryou screamed, pushing him into the arms of Jounouchi.

The rock crumbled and fell into the darkness. Ryou along with it.

"Bakura!" the Pharaoh shouted and reached for him.

Ryou reached back, tears falling from his face. Their fingertips grazed over each. His hand was soft and warm. (Like salvation.) All Ryou had to do was squeeze a little tighter.

_Landlord._

-0-

"But?" Ryou questioned, voice barely a whisper. Horror had already crawled through all of him by now. Had snatched his voice.

Amane looked at him, terrified and confused.

"But you let go."

-0-

He had never died before, and he couldn't remember being born, but it must have felt like this.

Sharp knife kisses stabbed and caressed him.

Ryou was sure he saw Yuugi, for a split second.

He knew it was a fact when the spirit wrapped his arms around him and the image faded away.

-0-

"And then what?" Ryou asked softly, pulling himself into a ball. Tears slid down his cheeks freely.

He had never once yelled at Amane. Not once until now.

"_And then what_!"

-0-

"My sister," Ryou said as he draped his jacket over what was left of their bodies, "When will I get to see my sister?"

"In time, Landlord. We have eternity," said the spirit, "Now come. Watch this with me."

Ryou did as he was told, leaning against the spirit as he watched the souls turn into smoke, rising up to a blood red moon, and dissolving into the darkness of the sky.

Like something out of his dreams.

-0-

"And then I woke up."

* * *

Reviews, please?


	78. The Feel of It

A/N Post-series. Gonna assume some sort of interaction between Ryou and Malik happened during Battle City.

* * *

_You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see, but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel. ~ Unknown _

* * *

"It doesn't feel over," Malik sneered.

Soft droplets from the ocean hit Ryou as he listened intently.

"I don't know _why_. The items are gone. The Pharaoh's gone. I _saw_ him cross over myself," Malik growled, face frowning into some sort of last imprint of rage. (Ryou could almost feel it, the hatred, splashing him like the water below.)

Ryou inched closer to him. He didn't really know why. (He still didn't know, for the most part, anything. And the things he held as certainties could definitely never answer a 'why'.)

Malik closed his eyes, the rage falling back inside of him. Like a wave, collapsing in on itself.

"But I still!" he cried, eyes shut but his eyebrows furrowing.

"I still," he trailed off, hand curling around something that wasn't there. Absentmindedly, Ryou traced the scars on his chest.

Feel. He felt now, more than he could remember feeling (more than he was really prepared to feel…). He knew the spirit was gone. The millennium ring was buried forever; there was no way it could ever reach him. But he still…there was still…

There was still that linger sense of …

(_What_?)

Sighing, he reached out and held Malik's hand.

"Feel it," Ryou continued (for him), "But I still feel it."

* * *

A/N Review on your way out?


	79. Pluto

A/N Well, hi everyone, if there's anyone there. I bet you weren't expecting to hear from me ever again! I could give a million truthful reasons why I haven't been here, but they'll fall flat. Basically, I keep waiting for my life to settle down so I could write again. But life's never going to settle down, so I have to write anyway.

Thank you to everyone who has reviewed in the interim and I'm sorry I did not respond, but know that I treasured them.

So here's a new chapter! Definitely not worth the wait, it's _literally_ the first thing I've written in two years, but hopefully it's a start of more updates. I'm not making any promises, but I'm here and doing my best to write.

Anyway - on to the story!

Gemshipping. Modern AU.

* * *

_Myths are clues to the spiritual potentialities of the human life ~ Joseph Campbel_

* * *

Bakura's never had a conscience.

-0-

So that makes it all the more surprising when one day, one pops up.

He's in his World History class, when something catches his eye – a simple gold bracelet. It jiggles quite nicely when the girl in front of him raises her hand. But she's much too pale for it. It'll look better on his tan skin.

"Don't steal that," his conscience says, in a voice as soft as wind chimes.

Bakura hesitates, not because he's not going to steal it (he is), but because he's never had a voice in his head before.

"Why?" he asks back, genuinely curious, "I want it."

"But it's not yours," the voice counters.

"It should be. I'll make it be."

"You can't force ownership," says the voice gently, "Besides; this already belongs to someone else. How would you feel if someone took something precious to you?"

"I'd take it back."

He snatches the bracelet easily as the bell rings.

-0-

The voice returns almost every day after that, with its never-ending chorus of don'ts.

"Don't steal that. It's wrong."

"Don't touch that. It's sacred."

"Don't say that. It's cruel."

And so on and so on.

It's interesting at first, but eventually it just wears Bakura down.

"Just shut up!" he finally snaps, after arguing with the voice had made him miss his window of opportunity. (It's not easy to steal things from the Domino Museum.)

"I'm not going to do what you say!" he continues, voice dark with anger, "Not ever. So just shut up."

He can feel his conscience squirm around in his mind. Bakura's never regretted anything he's said, but he can't help but feel a little sorry for the voice. It's so weak and pathetic. There's no reason to yell at ants.

"You're annoying," the thief says, apologizing.

"I just want to help you be a better person." (Bakura can almost feel the voice's pleading breath on his ear.)

"Don't waste your time," Bakura says, "Haven't they already told you? I'm lost cause."

(He remembers suddenly, clearly, all the doctors standing around him. Looking down at him. His mother crying.)

"Someone like me can't ever be good," he says again, more to himself than the voice. (Even if the voice is himself.)

"It's hard to be good," the voice says wisely, "That's why we settle for better."

-0-

"You should do your school work."

"No," Bakura says and goes to sleep.

-0-

He trips Atemu in the hall. It's not a particularly clever or original plan, but it makes him laugh all the same.

"You should be nicer to him," his conscience says, unusually serious.

Bakura hisses. There are few people he hates in the world more than that spoiled brat Atemu Mutou. His parents own half of Domino (including the museum), so he always comes to school with the very best. He walks around with his nose stuck in the air and thinks that he's the closest thing to the Gods themselves. He's vain, arrogant and haughty and the whole school loves him just the same. They vote him student class president every year.

Nicer to Atemu? (He's seething now.) _Never_. He won't forgive that kind of betrayal from his own mind.

"I'm not betraying you," his conscience soothes, "I'm trying to help you."

"So you _say_."

"It's true! I have this feeling…" the voice trails off, "I just have this strong feeling that you two have the potential to be great friends."

Suddenly, Bakura laughs, louder than he has in years.

Foolish voice. Precious voice. Friends! What a naïve thought. Yet, he can't find the strength to scold his conscience; in truth, he finds it strangely endearing. He forgives it for betraying him.

"What's so naïve about friends?" his conscience asks timidly.

"I'll never have friends." Bakura says it with pride.

For the first time in a long time, there is silence in his mind.

Then, quietly, "Aren't we friends?"

Bakura blinks. Are they? He really doesn't know, no one asks him the kind of questions the voice does.

"If not," says the voice, still in a soft whisper, "I'd like us to be someday."

Friends. What a dumb thing for a conscience to want.

-0-

He's never had friends. Nor has he ever wanted them.

The people around him have always been afraid of him (which is fine with him, fear is a sign of respect). Besides, a thief has no need for friends. These are the things he tells himself.

-0-

He visits the museum the next day.

"You seem to like museums a lot," the voice notes and Bakura can tell it's pleased that something other than stealing makes him happy.

Oh, don't jump to conclusions so quickly, little voice.

"I like museums because they always have the prettiest treasure."

-0-

He hates school. Truthfully, he only attends because it makes for a good alibi. The trouble is attending is not enough; he must write papers and fill out workbooks and take exams. That bastard Atemu always gloats about having higher scores than he does, but Bakura knows his scores would be high too if he could just make _sense_ of the words. On paper they just blur and bleed together.

Last year he failed chemistry twice, so now he's stuck taking a remedial science class to make up for it. But even in this class he can't make heads or tails of the words. Something about space, he gathers. (He's always been fond of space; at least, he's always been fond of the moon and the stars.)

Bakura glares at the words, trying to use all of his hatred to force them into a form he can understand. But it's no use. All he accomplishes is straining his eyes. He's about to rip the papers to shreds when a gentle presence falls upon him.

"I can tell you the answer. There are nine planets in our solar system," his conscience says, "Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto."

Bakura blinked. Was it normal for a person's conscience to help with homework? He decides to ask.

"I'm not sure," the voice admits, "I don't remember what normal is."

A pause.

"I don't think I'm your conscience though."

Bakura is taken aback for a second, but then shrugs it off. He's never had a conscience anyway.

"Then what are you?" he asks the voice.

"I think I might be a ghost."

"Oh."

…

"What's the answer to the next one?"

-0-

"If you're a ghost," Bakura asks, once all the homework is done, "how did you die?"

"I don't remember."

Bakura scoffs, "You don't remember your own death but you can remember the names of the planets?"

"It's not like I can control what I remember," the voice says, with a slight quiver to it. It's sad. (And that makes Bakura feel…something too.)

"Well, what _can_ you remember?" he asks harshly.

"Nothing."

"Well, you must remember something. You can talk, at least."

"That's true," the voice says, just a tad brighter, "I remember a lot of non-consequential stuff: algebra, rainy days, creampuffs, and boards games. I remember feelings too."

"You remember _feelings_?" sneers Bakura.

"Yes. I remember this feeling that I was doing something very important when I…" the voice trails off, "well, I guess when I died."

Hmm. Maybe it's his turn to ask questions.

"What's it like being dead?"

"I'm not sure really," says the voice, "I don't remember being alive; I don't have much to compare it to."

"Can anyone else hear you?"

"No. You're the only one."

That pleases Bakura, though he doesn't know why.

"Why me?"

"There could be a lot of reasons," explains the spirit, "You could be psychic or some sort of medium. Perhaps I lived in this house before you and I only show myself to its residents."

Bakura looks around, acutely aware of how much he hates this place. It's dark and dirty, the water only works half the time, and he can hear the rats scurrying in the walls at night. But his parents abandoned him four years ago and this complex's landlord was the only one willing to rent to him under the table.

When he turns eighteen he'll have a palace.

The voice continues on, "Maybe you're a descendent of mine, though I'm pretty sure I never had children. Or maybe someone has cursed you with me? It could also be that you have something that houses my soul and I simply follow it."

Wow. He never knew there were so many reasons for being a ghost.

"I think I was very into the occult when I was alive," says the voice, almost guiltily, "Maybe that's why I'm like this."

"Which answer do you pick?" asks Bakura.

"I couldn't say. I don't even know for sure I'm a ghost."

"Well, what else could you be?"

"I could be a demon."

Bakura laughs.

-0-

In the morning, he asks the voice a question that had been writhing in his mind all night.

"What was it like before you met me?"

"Lonely."

-0-

"You lied to me!"

Bakura rages at the voice, on and on for the entirety of 5th period. It isn't until midway through 6th that the voice can get a word in edge wise.

"I didn't lie to you," the voice whispers to him gently, soothingly. Like he's a damn child.

"You didn't?" he sneers, "Then explain to me how I got the answer _wrong_, wise ghost of mine."

In his mind, he can feel the voice deflate.

"I don't know."

"Huh? Really? You don't know. Gee, that seems really familiar. You don't know much of anything, do you? Poor ghost," he taunts, "It must be so hard for you. All alone. You don't even have any memories to keep you company."

"Stop. You're being cruel."

"Cruel! I'm kinder to you than the whole rest of the world," Bakura snarls, "Only I hear you. Tell me, ghost, if I wasn't here to listen would you even exist at all?"

The voice exhales. (He can feel the breath on his neck.)

"You're only saying these things because you're cross with me," it rationalizes, "But it's not my fault."

Bakura glowers, but the voice continues on.

"I swear that Pluto was a planet when I was alive."

-0-

"I can prove to you I'm right," the voice says once school is finished.

Bakura snorts, "You don't deserve my trust."

"Though I think you're getting awfully hung up on one question out of thirty-five, I understand that trust is a fragile thing. Please let me prove myself."

Stupid silky voice, spinning its pretty web. He hates when it makes sense.

"Fine, we'll go to the library – and don't you dare say anything, I know what a library is," Bakura snaps, "and if you're lying I'm checking out books on exorcisms."

-0-

Bakura scrolls through the articles on the computer, not paying much attention to them. The words blur even faster on the stupid machine.

"Ah, see! Look at that line there," The voice says and Bakura lifts his hand off the mouse.

"Its planetary status was revoked in 2006. I must have died before then."

Died before then. He never really thought about that.

"How old do you think you are?" he asks, previously frustration at the voice forgotten.

"I don't know."

Bakura sighs, "Is that the only answer I'm ever going to get from you?"

-0-

Even though the voice can't sate Bakura's curiosity, it is useful for school work. (Disregarding current events, of course.)

The voice spends hours at his side, encouraging him to try and whispering the answers when he gives up. Slowly, his grades start to improve.

"Now you see, after we solve for x we can go back and plug it in and solve for y..."

Bakura zones the ghost out, focusing instead on the pleasant rhythm of his voice, how it rolls up and down like soft ocean waves…

He smiles lazily to himself, until he sees blur race across his room. Rats or thieves? Whatever it was it was going to die.

Unless it was already dead.

There is a translucent boy floating in his living room. He's skinny. And kind of girlish, too. His hair falls a little passed his shoulders and he has a gentle expression on his face. He's wearing a t-shirt and jeans that fade into a swirl of mist. (He has white hair, even whiter than Bakura's own. He's never met another person like that.)

"Hey, voice," Bakura says.

The boy looks up with wide brown eyes.

"Yes?"

"You have a body."

The voice looks down at his hands and then back up.

"I guess I do," he shrugs, "Now, as I was saying…"

-0-

Bakura and Atemu's voices rise in outrage simultaneously.

"_What_!"

"Mr. Mutou, Mr. Inoue, calm yourselves! Or I'll send you both to detention –" what's-her-name teacher exclaims.

"I'd rather be in detention than have to work with that –"

The voice puts its ghostly hand on his shoulder. He stops himself.

Atemu looks like his just itching to say something, but doesn't as well.

"Thank you," teacher says, "As I was saying, the two of you will be assigned Greek and Roman mythology. Which leaves Egyptian mythology for Ms. Kiryuu and Ms. Shinohara."

Bakura is furious. His fists are shaking so badly he thinks he'll start an earthquake.

"It's okay," the voice says, "It'll be okay."

The boy wraps his transparent arms over Bakura's shoulders and even though he's dead, Bakura can feel his heart beat with his own. Thump, thump. Thump, thump.

(And, for the first time, his stupid little conscience wins.)

They make no progress on their project. Instead, Bakura and Atemu spend the rest of class glaring at each other.

But, all things considered, it's a start.

-0-

"This is stupid!" Bakura yells and throws the book at the wall. The voice tries to pick it up, but his fingers just run through it.

"It's not so bad," says the voice, "It's actually pretty interesting when you have the right textbook."

"It doesn't make any sense," Bakura moans. He kicks the textbook (even though is already on the ground) and pretends that it's Atemu's face.

"Why do they all have so many names? I can't keep them straight," he grumbles.

"I'll help," the voice says, with a smile on his stupid face, "This book doesn't tell them right, anyway."

Bakura pursues his lips. He really doesn't want to learn this, but the thought of listening to the voice tell him stories is not a bad one.

"Alright," Bakura says and settles himself cross legged on the floor, "Go."

"Well, I guess we should start with the gods in the Pantheon; they're the most important. Don't worry," the voice smiles again, "We'll just start with the names. There's Zeus/ Jupiter and his wife Hera/Juno. There's Poseidon/Neptune along with Dionysus/Bacchus. Apollo is Apollo in both versions but his twin sister is called Artemis or Diana. Then, there's Hermes/Mercury and Athena /Minerva. And after that is Ares/Mars and his some-times lover Aphrodite/Venus. Finally there is Demeter/Ceres and Hephaestus/Vulcan."

Bakura just stares. He didn't understand a word of that, but doesn't tell the voice, since the poor thing seems out of breath.

"I know that's a lot, but those are the major ones," he stops for a moment, remembering something, "Except for Hades of course. He's a really important god, but he's not on the pantheon since he spends all his time ruling the underworld. The Romans called him Pluto."

"Pluto?" Bakura says, perking up, "You mean the not-planet Pluto?"

The voice blushes. Or rather, he makes a face that living humans make when they blush. There's no color to his cheeks. (Though Bakura imagines that it would look quite nice.)

"I told you," the voice says, pouting in his pretend body, "It really was a planet when I was alive."

-0-

Pluto is the Lord of the Underworld and Ruler of the Dead. He didn't get the job by choice; he just drew the shortest straw. He revels in his duties, regardless.

Bakura can relate.

-0-

Pluto is the God of Riches and Precious Metals.

Mining digs up wealth from underneath the earth. The voice says that's how he came to be associated with the underworld. The little ghost seems slightly perplexed about how the two relate, but they make perfect sense to Bakura.

Death and riches go hand in hand.

-0-

Pluto possesses a helmet that can make him invisible.

The voice looks at him disconcertingly when Bakura happily explains all the ways it would be useful.

-0-

The voice spends lifetimes reading to him. Bakura knows he can live in these moments forever.

-0-

A few days later, the teacher tells the class that next session they'll be meeting at the library. She informs them that it's the only class time they'll get for their stupid mythology project _and_ that it's due in two weeks. It'll count as twenty percent of their final grade.

Bakura scowls all the way through fourth period.

"You're going to have to talk him," says the voice, once school is over, "You don't want to fail."

"I'd rather flunk that stupid class a million times than work with that pompous bastard."

The voice shakes his snowy head, "No, you don't want that – "

"Don't tell me what I want." Bakura crosses his arms and turns away from the ghost.

Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees the voice smile. It's a really dumb looking smile. He scoffs.

"Bakura," says the voice.

Bakura looks up. It's the first time he's ever heard the voice say his name.

"You've been doing so well at school," the voice says proudly, "I don't want to see your temper ruin it for you. You're better than that."

Bakura glowers. The voice's words are making his cheeks hot and his stomach feel all queasy.

"Besides," the voice continues brightly, "if you and Atemu both fail than you'll just have to retake the class together. You don't want that, right?"

Bakura doesn't have anything to say to that.

-0-

He arrives at the library ten minutes after the bell.

The teacher doesn't notice him (he is a thief, after all, even if the voice has been weighing down his efforts) and he slides into one of the empty tables.

"I think they keep their mythology books in that section," says the voice, pointing at the left corner of the library. No one else but Bakura sees him.

"Yeah, yeah," he mutters under his breath and trudges toward them. Fifteen minutes of looking through titles and skimming pages later, Atemu still hasn't shown up. For whatever reason, this enrages Bakura. Far more than if Atemu had just shown up in the first place.

What, did that bastard think he was too good to work on a project with him?

"Maybe he just fell ill," the voice chirps in.

Bakura snorts. He grabs about five different books and slams down on his table. If Atemu wants to fail, that's more than fine with him.

"That's the spirit!" The voice settles above his shoulder. Bakura buries his head in the books, taking his time, trying to decipher the words as best he can. Suddenly, he hears laughter.

His head snaps up and he finds Atemu looming over him. The red eyed boy chuckles again.

"Just what is so funny?" Bakura snarls as he stands up.

"Nothing," Atemu says, smirking, "I just didn't know you could re – "

Suddenly, he stops himself.

"Finish your damn sentence," Bakura growls, voice low and deep. (His fists are shaking again.)

Atemu glares at the bookshelf next to him, refusing to meet Bakura's eyes.

"Just nevermind," he says and wanders away into the books.

Bakura is about to pummel the answer out of him (voice be damned) but then the bell rings. The voice, with his little ghostly hands, nudges him along.

-0-

Pluto has a wife named Proserpina. He stole her (but didn't do a very good job of it). Proserpina's mother took revenge by laying waste to all the vegetation, knowing that Jupiter would have to rule that Prosperina be returned to her. Pluto then tricked the maiden into eating some pomegranate seeds, so she would always have to spend part of the year with him. That's why we have seasons, or something.

"In some versions, she fell in love him and ate the seeds herself," the voice says, with a faraway look in his eyes, "Isn't that interesting?"

"No," Bakura states.

"Why not?"

"He's powerful; of course she'd fall in love with him."

"I don't think that's it," the voice says, with a thoughtful look on his face. He always has that look on his face.

"What _else_ would it be?"

"Empathy."

"_Empathy?_" Bakura repeats, incredulous.

The voice nods.

"Proserpina's mother completely isolated her. I'm sure she must have had a lot of lonely days. When she was brought to the underworld, maybe she saw how lonely Pluto was and empathized with him."

Bakura just stares.

"Who would be _stupid_ enough to empathize with the God of the Dead?"

The voice touches a finger to his lips.

"Well I guess that would depend on which God of the Dead we're talking about."

-0-

The voice is reading Bakura's literature homework to him, when all of a sudden he freezes.

"That's my name," he says, and there are no hints of wind chimes in his voice now.

"_What_?"

"That's my name!" the voice repeats with more urgency.

Bakura gapes at him, trying to recall the last passage they read.

"You're name is Sakura Arisugawa?"

"No," the voice says with a great sigh. (He's trembling slightly.)

"My name is Ryou."

-0-

Two days pass and nothing changes.

"You have a name now," snipes Bakura, "Aren't you going to do something with it?"

"Like what?" the voice says with great melancholy, "It's just a first name. Though I guess it could be my last name…"

The voice glares at the floor.

"I still don't know anything."

-0-

"We should go the museum, tomorrow," the voice says, not as bright as he used to be, but getting better, "to help with your project. It's almost due."

"Heh. Really?" Bakura teases, "I thought you hated it when I go to the museum."

"I don't hate it," the voice says, exasperated, "I just I prefer it when you _don't_ steal ancient artifacts."

-0-

Pluto, the thing that used to be a planet, has a moon named Charon. Charon is so named after the Greek figure who ferried souls to the land of the dead.

"It's interesting isn't?" the voice says, not really talking to Bakura at all, "How it all comes back around?

-0-

Bakura and his ghost are walking to the museum when a woman screams.

"Thief!" she shouts, "Someone stop him! Thief!"

Bakura spots the 'thief' immediately in the crowd. He has no skill or artistry and his feet are practically tripping over themselves in a desperate attempt to escape. All it takes is a jet of his leg for the wannabe thief to crumble.

Bakura seizes the red purse out of his grimy hands.

"Oh, thank you!" the woman cries, "Thank you."

Bakura grimaces.

"Just take it," he says, offering her the purse, "And try not to be so careless next time."

The woman makes a move to thank him again, but he disappears quickly into the crowd. Bakura's sure that if he had to listen to her for another moment he'd hurl. Sighing, he turns around and heads back towards the museum, thinking that's the worst of it.

It's only when he looks up at the voice that he realizes he's wrong. He hasn't even started to grasp what he's done.

"Bakur –" the voice says, but he cuts him off.

"_Don't_. Don't you dare," he warns, already seeing that stupid smile start to break out on the voice's face.

"I'm still a thief and you're stupid Pluto still isn't a damn planet so don't you dare – "

The voice – Ryou – just laughs and throws himself into Bakura's arms.

It's like being hugged by a freezer. (Or the farthest not-planet from the sun.)

-0-

The museum has two new exhibits, one on Ancient Egypt and the other on the Iron Age of Mesopotami. While they both hold very pretty treasure, neither of them have anything do with his project.

"Can we go home now?" Bakura asks, dreadfully bored. Not even pickpocketing seems appealing to him now. He just wants to go home and maybe have the voice read to him some more.

"Let's keep looking," the voice urges him, "My intuition is telling me that there is something important here."

Bakura narrows his eyes, "We're not here for my project at all, are we?"

The voice looks away guiltily.

"Forgive me," he says, "But I must find out who I am."

"Of course, _Ryou_." (He sneers the name like a curse.)

"Please don't be cross with me," Ryou says, hovering closer to him, "It has nothing to do with you."

"Oh, it doesn't?" Bakura chuckles darkly, "What happens when you do find the answers to all your questions? Ghosts only remain ghosts because they have unfinished business. What will happen to you once you've finished yours?"

Ryou drops. He floats shoulder to shoulder with Bakura now, instead of above him.

"I don't know," Ryou mumbles, "I don't even know if I am a ghost."

"Do you want to leave?" Bakura turns his eyes away, "Move on to the Underworld?"

Ryou shakes his head, "Not really."

"Then why are you doing this!" Bakura shouts, eyes flashing, "Things are fine just the way they are! You're fine like this."

"Things are not fine," Ryou says firmly, "I can sense its presence. Every day it grows a little bit stronger, biding its time before it's powerful again."

"What does?"

Ryou's eyes are somber. "The thing that killed me."

Bakura relaxes, "So it that what you are? A spirit of revenge?"

"No," Ryou says, again uncharacteristically certain.

"It's fine; you can tell me," Bakura smirks, "I'm sure if I was ever murdered I would come back and seek my revenge as well."

"No," Ryou repeats, "It's not like that. The thing I've been feeling…it's not human."

"My, my," Bakura says, with no hint of humor, "You were messing with some dark things."

"If I did," Ryou stares at his translucent hands, "I certainly paid the price."

Bakura watches him and feelings that he doesn't know what to do with at _all_ whirl through him. Finally, he speaks.

"Alright, we can have one more look around."

(Ryou only looks a little surprised.)

"Thank you," he says.

"Yeah, yeah. Lead the way."

-0-

They wind up in the basement. Bakura's has been there a couple times, it's where the museum stores a few of the exhibits they have when they're not showing them upstairs. Occasionally, it'll have something interesting, but most of the good stuff is in other, more protected rooms.

Bakura walks towards the center of the room, where all the boxes and cases are.

"No, I have a feeling we should go left."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Fine," Bakura says with a sigh and turns left. They walk about ten yards before a filing cabinet blocks their path.

"There's something behind it," says Ryou.

"Obviously," Bakura replies. He shoves the cabinet to the side and in its place is a wooden door.

"Still want your answers, ghost?"

Ryou nods. He places his hand over Bakura's as he opens the door.

-0-

Pluto the not-planet, at its coldest, is -250 degrees Celsius. Because it is so cold, most artistic depictions of it color it blue or purple. In reality, it is reddish brown.

Bakura respects that. Red has always been a good color to him.

-0-

Honestly, when Bakura opens the door he half expects the Furies themselves to lash out at him. Nothing of the sort happens. Instead, the door only leads to a bigger and even more empty room. There is no light. They can only see because Ryou's body has a slight glow to it.

"This feels so familiar," Ryou mutters, floating deeper into the room, "I feel like I've been here a thousand times."

Bakura frowns. His stomach does flips at the thought of Ryou existing without him.

"This way," says Ryou and Bakura follows him.

The ghost leads him down another hallway until they come to yet _another_ door. This one isn't block half as well as the last one. It only has a small pathetic crate guarding it. Bakura easily pushes it aside with his foot.

"Are you sure you want to open that?" he asks dryly, "Is it just going to lead to more doors?"

"I don't know," Ryou admits, "But my heart tells me that I should open this door."

"Your heart?"

A nod.

"You say the strangest things," Bakura says as he twists the doorknob, "Aren't ghosts supposed to be scary?"

Ryou doesn't say anything back; he's too busy staring at the contents of the room. Bakura, too, is aghast.

Inside the room is some kind of game board ("It's a tabletop RPG!" Ryou says in amazement) that is at least two yards in length. There are two throne-like seats at each end and by the board's four corners are lit torches. Little figurines, a deck of cards and ten-sided die are all scattered across the board. Someone's been playing it.

"Ba-Bakura!" barks an ungodly arrogant, but very familiar, voice.

Shit.

"What are you doing here?" Bakura shouts, before Atemu can have a chance.

"What am _I_ doing here?" Atemu rages, "My parent's own the museum! What are you doing here?"

Bakura crosses his arms. "I got lost."

Atemu glares, "Do you think I'll fall for that?"

"Yeah, well, _prove_ I was doing anything other than looking for the bathroom, Mr. President."

Atemu lets out a frustrated snarl. "Bakura! I don't have time for your games! Get out of here now before I call security!"

Bakura looks towards down at the spectacle before them. "It seems to me like you're the one playing games."

Atemu steps forward threateningly.

"Fine, fine, I'll go," Bakura says, putting his hands up, "I don't want to be around anyway when the guards ask you what you were doing playing this elaborate game all by yourself."

Atemu glowers. "What do you know, Bakura?"

"What do you know?" Bakura shoots back. What the hell kind of question was that? Did Atemu know more about that RPG game and the non-human power than he did? The nerve of that bastard!

"Let's go," Ryou whispers into his ear, "Let's go while he's still giving us the chance."

Bakura snorts. As much as he hates leaving a battle, Ryou was right. Better to flee and live to fight another day.

"I'll see you at school tomorrow," he sneers and exits the room.

-0-

Once they are a good distance away from the museum, Ryou speaks again.

"That game houses all of my secrets. I'm completely certain of it now."

He looks at Bakura pleadingly, "I have to see it again."

"Don't worry, little ghost," Bakura smirks, running a finger across Ryou's nonexistent cheek. (The touch is cold.)

"We'll be back after hours."

-0-

At home, Bakura prepares for war.

He keeps his treasure hidden under the floorboards of his apartment and tonight it has all resurfaced. Bakura weeds through piles of things that had caught his eye: bracelets, necklaces, statues and brooches. Anything that looks like it could be even remotely mystical he places on his body. By the end his arms covered with bracelets all the way up to his elbows and his pockets full of statuettes.

Ryou eyes him up and down. "Is all that necessary?"

"Yes," huffs Bakura, "Whatever this thing is, last time you fought it – _it killed you_."

He slips an ornate dagger into the pocket of his red sweatshirt, "I'd rather _not_ have the same thing happen to me."

"Fair enough," Ryou says and floats towards the window.

"It's a full moon," he notes, "Do you think it means anything?"

Bakura snorts, "Aren't you the one who should be telling me?"

Ryou's bangs fall over his eyes and he turns away from the thief.

"It could be very dangerous to go tonight," Ryou confesses, "And yet I can't shake this feeling that I must…"

Ryou wraps his arms around his semi-visible body.

"I'm sorry, this is all so selfish. I shouldn't be putting you in danger like this."

Bakura, grunting, swats his hand through Ryou. Literally through. The boy's mid-section turns to mist for a second.

"You're not putting me through anything," Bakura says, "I'm doing this because I chose. I want to help you find the answers you seek."

Ryou looks up at him. He smiles, ever so slightly.

Bakura scowls, "Don't look at me like that. It's only so that you'll be less annoying when I ask you stuff. Now come on, let's go. It's midnight."

-0-

No one worships Pluto, because they know death cannot be swayed.

When Proserpina is Queen of the Underworld, she is so feared that people only speak her name in curses.

"You see," the voice says, "she understands Pluto's loneliness better than anyone."

-0-

Bakura breaks into the museum with ease; he must have done it a thousand times by now.

"There's still time to turn back," Ryou says as they enter the basement.

"Stop bothering me!" Bakura barks, "How many times do I have to tell you that I'm going to do this?"

Ryou deflates, floating closer to the ground, "I'm just saying that if you want to go back there's still –"

"Shut. Up. Ghost."

Ryou does, but he still has that little concerned look on his face. It's annoying. They reach the second door faster than before and just before Bakura opens it, he pauses.

"What's wrong?" Ryou asks.

"Shh…" Bakura says, "There's someone talking."

He presses his ear against the door.

"Partner…all I want to do is help you…"

Bakura's mouth drops open. Atemu, again? Just what the hell is that guy up to?

"I know that, I know that," Atemu says, "But how can you expect me to do this if it might hurt you?"

"Can you hear this?" Bakura whispers. Ryou nods and purses his lips into a tight frown.

"Go inside," the ghost says.

"What!" Bakura hisses, still trying to keep his voice a whisper, "You were the one who told me to leave just a few hours ago!"

"It's different now."

"How? If that bastard sees that I'm here he'll call the cops for sure!"

"Bakura," Ryou says, with fire in his eyes, "I know who he's talking to."

Bakura stops, stunned.

"Go inside," Ryou repeats, turning his head towards the door, "Go inside and tell him everything I tell you to."

Bakura winces, internally struggling between his instincts as a thief and his duty to his ghost. He growls.

"If you're wrong about this –"

"I'm not."

Sighing, Bakura pushes the door open. There is Atemu, standing in the same spot Bakura last saw him in, talking to air. Atemu's eyes bulge.

"Ba-Bakura! What are you doing here?"

(Bakura didn't even know the answer to that himself.)

He shrugs, "Doesn't it feel like we just had this conversation?"

Atemu looks like he could strangle Bakura with his bare hands.

"I'm calling the cops!" he says, storming to the door.

"Ask what he knows about Zorc," Ryou says, glaring daggers at Atemu. (He'd never seen the ghost look so mad. He didn't even know the ghost _could_ get mad.)

"Oi! Mr. President, before you go, I want you to tell me something."

Atemu stops dead in his tracks.

"What do you know about Zorc?"

The whole room freezes. Then, slowly, Atemu turns around.

"I should have known you would have something to do with this with this Game of Darkness, Bakura."

Game of darkness? What the _hell_ was a game of darkness? But Bakura doesn't dare ask; he can't stand the thought that Atemu knows more than him.

So he fakes a laugh, "Maybe, maybe not. Why don't you tell me what you know before you start making accusations?"

Atemu clenches his fist and holds his head higher.

"I'll make you pay for what you did to my partner."

"You're 'partner'?" Bakura restates, trying to figure out who he meant, "You mean that girl who's always hanging out with you in History? I didn't do anything to her."

"Anzu's not my – what are you even talking about?" Atemu asks, just as perplexed as Bakura.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the other me who lives inside of me! The one whose soul _you_ sealed away!"

"Sealed away his soul?" Bakura echoes, voice thick with disbelief, "Who the hell do you think I am, Pluto?"

"Who?" Atemu says, gaping at him, "Are you Zorc or not?"

"Don't ask me stupid questions! _You_ were the one who was talking to Zorc earlier!"

"I was not!"

"Was too!"

"Was not – ugh!" Atemu let out a strangled cry, "What are you even doing here, Bakura? Have you come here just to be a thorn in my side?"

"Oh please. Don't flatter yourself! I came here to help my ghost."

"Your…ghost," Atemu states flatly.

Bakura glares. "You're the one who just admitted to having a split personality a second ago!"

"It can't be…" Ryou blanches. Trembling, he buries his face in his hands.

"What is it?" Bakura asks.

"What's _what_?" Atemu shouts, "I didn't say anything!"

"Could it really be?" Ryou mutters to himself. Suddenly, his head shoots up.

"Is it you, Yuugi-kun?"

"Who's Yuugi?" Bakura yells, beyond exasperated.

"How do you know my partner's name?"

"What's with you and this partner thing?"

"I remember now," Ryou says softly, so softly it could be mistaken as the summer breeze.

Then, a hundred times stronger, "Bakura, I remember now!"

"Great! Does that mean we can get the hell out of here now?"

"Who are you talking to?" Atemu asks, throwing his hands up in the air.

Ryou shakes his head urgently.

"No, no, I have to finish the game of darkness I started."

"You mean you're Zorc?" Bakura questions, feeling a brain tumor coming on.

"I already told you I'm not!" Atemu yells.

"No. But I did summon him. By accident, of course, not that it matters. I was such a fool…" Ryou's hair falls over his eyes.

"Ghost," Bakura says, stepping closer to Ryou, "Tell me how you died."

"I give up," Atemu mutters to himself and walks back to the game board.

"Yuugi, my most precious friend, he and I we're avid gamers. We were always trying out the latest ones and looking for ways to make the old ones more interesting. In my foolishness, I turned to the occult for our amusement. It was supposed to be a simple spell."

Ryou fidgets and grabs his arm.

"It would temporarily transfer our minds into our game pieces so we could act out the story for real. I built that huge diorama and my father let me keep it down here. He used to be the owner of the museum."

Ryou still couldn't bear to look up at Bakura.

"But I did the spell wrong," Ryou says, voice cracking, "I transferred our souls instead. More than that, I breathed life into the antagonist of our game, Zorc."

Bakura inhales. He's never be good understanding others emotion. He's never wanted too. He has plenty emotions of his own to experience. But right now, all he wants is for Ryou to tell him everything – to tell him how he feels.

"Keep going," Bakura says. (Softly.)

"Yuugi and I tried to defeat him as best we could; we fought long and hard. But it was pointless; in the game Zorc has infinite power. And I knew that if we lost, Zorc would be able to use our bodies to get into the real world. So I did the only thing I could think of."

Ryou looks up at Bakura now; there are dark tears in his eyes.

"I split our _souls_," he moans, "I used the darkness in our hearts to power a spell that would bind him to his game piece forever. It worked, but at a terrible price. I was only half a soul now, so I couldn't move on. I was doomed to wait in limbo until either Zorc freed himself or the darkness in my soul returned to me."

"Me," Bakura says, "You mean me. I'm your darkness."

Ryou nods. He closes his eyes tightly together, trying not to cry.

"And it's the same for him, too isn't?" Bakura says, jerking his thumb towards Atemu who was talking to himself. Probably saying the same things Bakura was saying now.

"I believe so, yes."

Bakura blinks, letting the truth that he'd spent his whole life with just half a soul wash over him. To be honest, it actually explains a lot. He shrugs.

"If that's all this is, what's the big deal?" He yawns, "Let's go home."

Ryou just stares, "Don't you hate me? For the horrible fate I've cursed us with?"

"No. It doesn't bother me that much. Can we go now?"

"B-bbut I," Ryou stutters, "I have to destroy Zorc once and for all. I can feel him getting stronger."

"Okay."

Bakura marches over to the table and scans all the different figurines. His eyes stop on a black demon/dragon hybrid.

"This the guy?" Bakura says, picking up the small piece.

"Yes," says Ryou, "What are you going – "

Bakura crushes Zorc in the palm of his hand.

"What did you just do?" Atemu shouts, rushing over towards them.

"I killed Zorc," Bakura says simply, wiping the little bits of wood on his jeans, "What does it look I did?"

"Can he do that?" Atemu asks the air next to him.

A dark scream pierces the room. Out of nowhere, a swift gust of wind extinguishes all the torches simultaneously. The room shakes as if Pluto's great horses Orphnaeus, Aethon, Nyctaeus and Alastor might break through the ground at any moment.

Then, slowly, as if nothing had happened, the torches flicker back to life.

Atemu is the first to speak.

"I can't believe that worked."

Ryou frowns, "That was very…anti-climactic."

"What are you guys complaining about?" responds Bakura, "I thought you wanted him dead."

"It's just," Atemu says, staring at the game board, "shouldn't it be a bit harder than that?"

Bakura ignores him. A spoiled brat like him would always find something to complain about.

"We're going home," Bakura tells Ryou.

"Wait!" Atemu says, "What about our other halves?"

"What about them?"

"We have to lay them to rest," Atemu says, placing his hand over his heart, "It's our duty to help them cross over."

-0-

Orpheus was a fool who let his lover die.

"But," the voice tells him, "He went to the Underworld to rescue her. When he came to Proserpina and Pluto's thrones he played a song of their love. It was so gorgeous and tender and bittersweet that it made Proserpina weep. And no one else had even seen Pluto's eyes shine as brilliantly as they did that day. They allowed him to return with Eurydice on one condition."

"What's that?"

"He could not turn around and look at her as he walked back to Earth."

"Well how was he supposed to know she was there?" Bakura asks, "You can't trust the God of the Dead."

"No," the voice agrees, "But he could trust his love for her."

_Trust his love for her?_

The voice says such stupid things.

And, anyway, Orpheus turned around.

-0-

Bakura clenches his fist. The moment his voice stopped being his conscience and started being Ryou, he knew he'd have to face this someday. His ghost was a _ghost_ after all. He was all dead and stuff.

He lowers his voice so Atemu can't hear him.

"Is that what you want?" he asks. His mouth is dry and his voice is hoarse and his insides feel trampled on.

"Now that you have your memories, do you want to move on?"

Ryou smiles at him, so softly, so tenderly. (Who else but Ryou could ever look at him like that?) Slowly, he cups his hand around Bakura's cheek. It's a pseudo touch, but Bakura can still feel its cold chill.

"It wouldn't be fair for me to haunt you the rest of your life," Ryou says, stroking Bakura's scar, "You deserve autonomy. And for my sins, I deserve to be dead."

"Are you talking to him?" Atemu asks, almost politely. Bakura growls as a response.

"Yuugi thinks the way to freedom is to smash their game pieces too."

Ryou kisses his forehead.

"Come on, let's go."

-0-

Pluto, in an attempt to entice Proserpina, planted narcissuses. Narcissus was a boy who fell in love with his own reflection.

"She was very beautiful," says the voice, "but he also saw himself in her."

-0-

Bakura holds Ryou's little model in his hand. He's some kind of white wizard, with a big floppy hat and a staff that sort of looks like an ankh. (Bakura can't bring himself to close his fist around it.)

Neither, it seems, can Atemu. Both boys just stare at the little figurines, unsure of what they can and cannot do.

"It's alright," Ryou whispers (always whispers), "It can't hurt me anymore than last time."

All of the gold on Bakura's chest begins to choke him. His bracelets weigh a thousand tons and he can't move his arms. Why did he bring so much accursed jewelry?

Ryou places his hand over his little mage.

"It's okay. I'm right here," Ryou says, with wind chimes in his voice, "And since we're sort of the same, I'll always be right here."

Without thinking, without breathing, Bakura crushes in his hand.

His conscience is splinters of wood; there is no more voice.

Then (because Bakura gets the feeling Atemu is too much of a coward to do it himself) he snatches Yuugi's statue and crushes it as well.

Atemu looks indignantly at him, but says nothing. Bakura thinks a part of him is relieved.

"W-what's going on?" says a voice that is neither Atemu nor Ryou.

Bakura whips his head around. Slouched in one of the giant chairs, is a boy who looks like a smaller, paler version of Atemu.

"Yuugi-kun?" says another voice. The only voice Bakura's ever heard.

Ryou is slumped in the opposite chair, just starting to slowly open his eyes.

"Ryou-kun?" says Yuugi as he opens his eyes. Then he shouts, "Ryou-kun!"

Before Bakura or Atemu can properly process what has happened, Ryou and Yuugi are out of their seats and running towards each other. Ryou sweeps Yuugi up into a big hug and the other boy laughs wildly into his shoulder.

They might be saying things to each other, Bakura can't tell. All he sees is them _holding_ each other and sobbing.

"I guess we should just let them have this moment," Atemu says, his voice strained.

Bakura folds his arms. "Yeah, I guess."

-0-

One of the bracelets Bakura had been wearing was enchanted. Ryou thinks that's part of the reason why Zork was so easily destroyed. (Bakura just thinks they were making a big deal out of nothing.) And it's definitely the reason Ryou and Yuugi were given back their bodies.

"You see?" Bakura says to Ryou, "And you told me nothing good would come from being a thief."

-0-

"I'm glad you were going to let me die," Ryou says, a thousand days after that night in the museum. He is sprawled out on the rooftop of their new apartment, looking at the moon. Bakura lies next to him. The night air is so chilly, when Bakura closes his eyes he can almost imagine they're on Pluto.

"Yeah, well don't get used to it," he says, stroking Ryou's face. It's so warm, almost unnaturally so. He doesn't know when he'll ever get used to it, but he keeps caressing it all the same.

"What do you mean?" Ryou asks, rolling over.

"I'm never going to let you die again."

"That's an awful thing to say."

Bakura has to laugh, even though his ghost is no longer a ghost he is still just as strange.

"Why is that?"

"Everyone is supposed to die eventually, Bakura. It's not natural when they don't," Ryou says, "Believe me, I'd know."

Bakura just smirks. "What is natural about life anyway? If anything ever happened to you I'd just steal you back again."

"Don't talk like that, it's dangerous," says Ryou, wearing that look of concern again, "Life and death is so much than we could ever possibly understand. They're not meant to be taken lightly. I've…I've crossed those lines before and I don't want you to ever do the same."

Ryou lightly touches Bakura's check.

"Despite what you may think," he says with a knowing smile, "you're not the God of the Underworld."

Bakura, grinning, pulls Ryou even closer. (He can feel Ryou's breath on his lips.)

"But I _am_ the King of Thieves."


End file.
